by Rye Brewer
And Allonic—well, I didn’t know the story with him. Only that he seemed to hover around Anissa. I would have to keep an eye on him. What were his real intentions? It was clear Anissa and I had a lot of catching up to do, even after spending what was really a short amount of time apart.
I especially wanted to tell her what happened on the other side of the portal. No, I couldn’t tell her the specific details. Only that I had met the infamous Fane. She would know who he was. Everyone did. I would tell her Fane knew where my brother was, but that I hadn’t had the chance to get the information from him before he transported me back to where I’d come from.
It didn’t matter what I wanted to tell her if we never made it back to somewhere we could be alone. I felt the presence of the others very acutely. Marianelle managed to pry her eyes from Steward long enough to shoot me a knowing look. She was the only one who knew exactly where I had been and exactly who I’d been with.
Or was she?
Allonic seemed to be giving me a knowing look, too. Almost like he knew exactly what was happening inside my head, or at least like he could get a feel for it. How was that possible? Could he feel all others, not just his sister? What an unnerving thought.
I turned back to the witch. “How can I get a hold of you when I need to return?”
“Return where?” she asked. “Or should I say, to whom?”
“Enough of your games. We both know he wouldn’t be happy if he knew you were playing them with me.”
Anissa’s hand slid into mine. “We all know who you’re talking about,” she murmured.
“You do?” My head snapped around in her direction.
She nodded. “Yes. Allonic told us that’s where you were going—to meet with Fane.” She squeezed my hand, but I could hardly feel it. There was too much going on inside to process minute by minute.
“At any rate,” I managed to sputter, wondering how much danger Anissa was in just by knowing who I’d been with. “How do I find you?”
I noticed Anissa glaring at Marianelle when I spoke to her. I could feel a seething anger rolling off her in waves, and her pulse raced. I felt it in her wrist, pressed against mine. She was upset—beyond upset. I looked down at her, and she shot a pointed look up at me.
“I’ll explain later,” I murmured. “Don’t get ahead of yourself.”
I heard a rushing noise as I finished speaking, and when I looked again at the space Marianelle had just occupied, it was empty. Only a tiny, fading dot of light remained. She’d thrown up a portal and vanished into it without a word.
“Damn!” I growled, exhaling in frustration.
What was I supposed to do then? She was the only one who could lead me to him. I couldn’t run the risk that he would summon me again, especially when I’d made it clear I had no desire to look for my brother. It didn’t mean I didn’t want to see him again, however. I couldn’t trust that he would understand what was happening in my heart.
Anissa frowned. It was clear she didn’t know why I was so desperate for Marianelle’s help. She clearly took me the wrong way, down to withdrawing her hand from mine. Terrific. Something else I had to deal with. Why not? I didn’t have enough going on.
I turned to Steward, who looked more himself once out of the presence of the witch. There was an almost tangible chemistry between them—not a very sweet one, but it was palpable nonetheless. “What do we do now? Go back to the Sanctuary?”
He shook his head. “It’s not safe there anymore. I’m not even entirely sure how safe it is for me.” His deep voice was heavy with concern.
I felt a stabbing pang of guilt. I had put him in danger, when all he’d ever tried to do was help me.
“I’m sorry,” I said, and I knew as the phrase left my lips how inadequate my words were.
“I understand. Now, it’s just a matter of finding somewhere else to send you.”
Allonic stepped in. “I might be able to find a place.”
“You could?” Anissa asked.
I heard so much hope in her voice, my heart went out to her. Something had passed between them while I was gone.
He nodded. “I just need a little time.”
Her face fell. “Time? I don’t think we have time. I don’t think we can afford to waste another minute.” She took a few steps away from me, then started pacing back and forth, arms crossed over her abdomen.
I heard her muttering something under her breath, like she was debating whether or not to do something. I only wished I knew what was happening in her head. I looked at the others and could tell they were just as confused as I was.
“All right,” she finally muttered, then turned to us. “I think I know where we can go. It’s the safest place right now, all things considered.”
“And where would that be?” Allonic asked.
She only gave him a cryptic smile.
That smile didn’t give me a very good feeling.
23
Anissa
I didn’t like the idea. In fact, I sort of hated the idea. But once I weighed our options, I knew it was the only answer.
I turned to Steward and Allonic. Both of them were waiting for me to say something. I wondered how it was possible for two beings to be so alike, yet so different. Then again, it was the same for any creature. My sister and I were both vampires, yet we were very different. Same thing with me and Jonah. We were alike—very alike in many ways—but fundamentally different. Maybe it was their similarities that put them at odds with each other. They were so similar, they rubbed up against each other.
That whack to the back of Steward’s head probably hadn’t helped things, either.
I took a deep breath. They wouldn’t like what I was about to say. “I need you to take us back to League headquarters.”
I had expected one or both of them to protest, but Jonah spoke before they had the chance. “Absolutely not!”
I glanced at him. “Why not?”
“Because it’s the worst idea I’ve ever heard. I mean, we just came from there. We were thrown out—well, you were thrown out. I left on my own. Still, I don’t think they’ll roll out a red carpet for us.” His brow creased when he frowned. “I can’t imagine why you would want to go back there.”
“It’s the only place we can go where there’s even a remote chance of safety,” I said. “The League of Vampires won’t turn you away.”
“And you? You’re…”
“I know what I am,” I nodded. “And this is still the best idea. I need you to trust me right now.”
He smirked. “You’ve said that before. Look where it got us.” He looked around the room, then back at me with a cocked eyebrow.
“Point taken,” I murmured, blushing again. “Still, this is right. I mean it. Please.”
He thought it over, then sighed.
I knew I would hear that sigh. It meant he was about to give in to me.
“Are you sure about this?” Steward asked.
“Do you have any other ideas?” I looked at Allonic. “I’m sorry—not that I don’t want your help, but we need to move fast.”
“I understand.”
Steward spoke up again. “All right. If you’re sure about this, I can take you to the meadow not far from the Sanctuary—but that’s as far as I can go.”
It was better than nothing. I looked at Jonah, who shrugged. “I don’t think I have much of a say right now. This is all your plan.”
My nose wrinkled. “You might as well tell me it’s my funeral.”
He chuckled as he took my hand.
We were in it together, and that was all I needed to know just then. Let’s hope my plan worked.
Allonic held up a hand. “Here.” He removed his cloak, revealing a simple tunic and pants beneath it. “You’ll need this.”
“Why?” Still, I reached for it. I could almost feel power tingling in the fabric. It made me wonder what its purpose was, then I remembered the way he’d covered me with it when we traveled to the room we were in now.
>
“You’ll need it if you don’t want the company of a spiritwalker.”
His knowing smile made me smile in return. I knew Allonic was thinking about how I’d fought off the wraith Steward had sent into me.
“Why would we need one, anyway?” Jonah asked.
“They’re necessary for you to pass through a shade portal,” he explained.
“Why couldn’t you have told us that to begin with?” Jonah looked incensed.
I shared that sentiment.
“It’s easier for you not to know when time is of the essence,” Steward explained, and again he glared at Allonic.
I could feel the tension between them rising again.
“Time is of the essence now,” I reminded them.
“Share it with Jonah,” Allonic continued. “That way, you’ll both be able to pass through.”
“Thank you,” Jonah replied.
I couldn’t help smiling again. It was nice to see them getting along together—we may have just met, but Allonic was still my brother. If the two of them got along, so much the better.
“Wait a minute. If we need a cloak to get through a shade portal, how come we could walk in and out of Sanctuary without a cloak or spiritwalker?”
He smiled indulgently, like someone speaking to a child. “The way you got in and out Sanctuary? That’s not a portal. It’s only a hidden entrance. Before Jonah showed it to you, you never would have found it. Once someone does show it, it’s like a key of sorts. Now you know it’s there. You can’t miss it, can you?”
“No. And it’s hard to believe I ever would have overlooked it before.”
He smirked. “That’s how it works. The entrance you used opens directly to Steward’s quarters. It’s his personal one.”
“Excuse me,” Steward said.
We both looked at him. He was glaring at my brother. “Are you sure you aren’t sharing too much information? It’s one thing to share your cloak…”
Allonic drew himself up to an even taller height.
I could just feel the animosity building all over again. It was enough to make me roll my eyes.
“There’s nothing wrong with sharing information—and my cloak with my sister,” he said in a dangerous tone of voice. “My mother would want me to help her, don’t you think?”
Steward didn’t look impressed. “Your mother is not a shade or a memory keeper. She has no responsibilities or accountability to the shades, unlike you or me. It doesn’t matter if she wants you to help your sister or not. She doesn’t live by our rules.”
Allonic laughed. “That’s funny, coming from you. You’re the one who brought the vampires in. You’re the one who showed them the entrance in the first place.” He pointed to Jonah, who looked less than pleased to be dragged into their fight. “You might as well have given them the key to the Sanctuary, since they can get right in thanks to you telling them how to. Don’t chastise me about what I should and shouldn’t do. You have no right.”
Steward opened his mouth to reply, but I beat him to it. “Speaking of. I want to see my mother.”
“Anissa, I wanted to talk to her first.”
“So, what are you saying?” I asked, shocked and hurt. “That she wouldn’t want to see me? You had to clear it with her first?” My heart ached unspeakably, even more than it had when I found out she was still alive and hadn’t reached out to me. She didn’t want me at all. The sketches didn’t mean anything if she didn’t want to take the chance and be with me.
I could hardly process everything I was feeling. It was like information overload. There was so much spinning through my head, nothing got through. I was numb. I almost didn’t feel Jonah’s hand touch my arm.
“We should go, quickly.”
I nodded, still numb. He was right. I would let Jonah take care of things for a little while. In the meantime, I would get my head straightened out. And my heart.
I spread the cloak between my two outstretched arms, and Jonah took one end to wrap around himself. Only when we were both covered did Steward lead us through the portal, back to the meadow just outside the Sanctuary.
Allonic followed.
Moments later, we were outside again. It was still dark, the moon still ripe and bright.
“Thank you,” I whispered to Allonic as I handed back his cloak. “You know how much that meant to me.”
“I do.” He fastened it again at his throat.
I couldn’t help asking, my curiosity getting the best of me even as my heart ached. “How does it work? Why did it make it possible for us to get through the portal?”
He touched the rough, strong cloth. “It’s imbued with the essence of spiritwalker. That’s how it makes crossing through shade portals possible.”
I knew we needed to leave—we were out in the open, at the mercy of any Enforcer that might come along. Still, I couldn’t help but mention it again. “One day, I want to see my mother. I need to.”
“And I’m sure she’ll insist on it. I didn’t want you to think she wouldn’t want to see you. It’s not like that at all. She wants to see you. And Sara.”
“She does?”
“As long as you don’t hate her. I think that’s what she’s most afraid of.”
My breath caught in my throat. “I could never hate her,” I whispered. “Not ever.”
“She’ll be glad to hear that,” he smiled.
“How—how will I find you?” I asked, though I felt Jonah’s eagerness to get out of there and knew time was ticking away. We still had to course to headquarters, which would take time. We had to get to safety before dawn.
“I’m a shade, remember? I’ll find you.”
I reached for him, and he took my hand. Something unspoken passed between us.
“You have to hurry,” Steward said. I heard regret in his voice. “You’re in danger. I’m sure there are Enforcers who will want to find the Enforcer you killed.”
“You killed an Enforcer?” Jonah asked, mouth hanging open.
“There’s a lot we need to catch up on,” I told him. “I did. And I fed on him. And you need to tell me about Fane.”
Steward cleared his throat. “I’m sure there are shades looking for you, too,” he added, as though we needed more of a reason to get out of there.
“Thank you,” I whispered to him, then looked at my brother one more time.
I hoped he was right, that he could find me when he wanted to. I needed to see my mother again. Just knowing she was there somewhere, filled me with conflicting emotion. I wanted more than anything to feel her arms around me again. I wanted to rest my head on her shoulder and let go of everything I’d been carrying around for so long. Everything Marcus made me do, everything I went through after saving Sara. All of it. Only my mother could help me make sense of it.
I took Jonah’s hand and rested easy in the knowledge that at least I wouldn’t have to think about anything while we coursed. He would lead the way. Good thing, too—I was so numb, so emotionally spent, I wished I were human. At least humans could sleep.
24
Philippa
I left Gage in the basement, where I’d found him. There was no helping him just then, and the more I tried, the more hopeless I felt. It was like trying to get through quicksand. The more I fought, the more it sucked me in.
“I’ll get back to you later,” I murmured before leaving him.
He nodded, and there was still a hopeful light in his eye.
I hated to see it. He had to know I couldn’t join him. I couldn’t give my blessing to a war. How had things fallen apart so quickly?
Vance waited at a distance.
I could hardly look at him.
His father. Had his father started the Great Fire? Had he blamed my parents? Was he the reason they went away? I couldn’t bring myself to believe it, especially when I saw the sincerity in Vance’s eyes. It was more than I could stand.
“What’s wrong?” he asked when I reached him.
“Who says there’s anything
wrong?” I asked.
He smirked. “Sure. Act like I don’t know you.”
I rolled my eyes. “Why does there have to be anything wrong? I talked to my brother. It shook me up a little. What do you expect?”
He nodded thoughtfully. “I guess that makes sense. Is he all right?”
“I wouldn’t say that,” I replied, trying to sound light. “I wouldn’t say that at all.”
He took my face in his hands. “I hate seeing you looking so worried,” he murmured. “I hate him for doing this to you. I’m sorry, but it’s true.”
I closed my hands over his. “I appreciate that, but it’s my problem to deal with, not yours. Don’t worry yourself too much about it.”
I wished he wouldn’t touch me that way—not that I didn’t like it, but because I liked it way too much. It was so hard to keep my heart under wraps when he made me feel the way he did.
He wouldn’t let go, even though I tried to tug his hands away.
“Have dinner with me,” he murmured, looking into my eyes.
I just about melted into him. How could I help it?
“Where?” I asked.
“Nearby.” He smiled, taking my hand in his. “Come on. I’ll show you.”
In a flash, I was in his arms—he was too fast for me to protest—and before I could blink an eye, we were coursing to the top of one of the spires on either side of the cathedral’s body. I didn’t have time to think or process what was happening before we reached the top.
“Wow,” I gasped when he set me on my feet. “You don’t let a girl get a word in edgewise, do you?”
“I find it’s harder for a girl to fight me when I don’t give her the chance,” he grinned.
“That’s very reassuring.” I looked around—we were at the top of the world, or so it seemed.
It was just like being at home, in the penthouse. For miles in all directions, all I saw were trees and rolling hills. The sky was clear, the moon shining bright. It was a beautiful night, and I was in the middle of it. Almost touching the stars.