by J. D. Lander
Connor was getting frightened. His mind flooded with thoughts. Had he been watching him? What did his words mean? Was this kid a stalker? Was he a serial killer? Was he stalking him so he could serial kill him?!
“Why have you been watching me?” Connor crossed his arms to hide his trembling hands.
“Because you are different. I told you that.”
“I think you need to leave before I call the police.” Connor threatened, now agitated.
“If you give me an answer, I will leave.” Adam didn’t appear to have any emotions unless curiosity counted, but that only showed in his words.
Connor turned and hastily walked away with his fists clenched in frustration. Once he was out of Adam’s view he ran into the house. As he ran he couldn’t help thinking that Adam was running behind him and would suddenly jump him moments before he reached safety. The paranoia caused him to slam the door shut, this time purposely.
“Connor, is that you?” his mom shouted from the kitchen.
“Yes! Quick, come look out the dinning room window!” He stamped his feet into the dining room and to the window to see if the boy was still there. Darcy dropped a dish into the sink and swiftly moved to meet him at the window.
“What is it?” Darcy feverishly searched the backyard. “What are we looking at?”
“Nothing. He’s not there anymore. There was a kid in the backyard a second ago.”
“Probably just one of the neighborhood kids playing. You had me scared!” She gently nudged him in the shoulder and returned to the kitchen.
Connor proceeded to his room. “Who was this boy?” He thought to himself. When he dropped his backpack it made a loud thud against the floor next to his desk. A moment later he found himself walking over to the window. He stared down into the yard; his eyes darting around like a hawk. The search ended abruptly. Adam was at the edge of the woods gazing up at him. “Uggh!” Connor groaned. He fiddled with the window’s lock for a minute before finally getting the window open. “Go away!” he shouted down into the yard.
“You’re angry. I will ask you again tomorrow,” Adam yelled back just loud enough for him to hear. His words still seemed to carry no emotion. Once again, Adam turned and disappeared into the woods.
Connor slammed his window shut, hoping the noise would travel across the yard. He felt pride in his success at getting rid of Adam. If it were a battle he was surely the victor. Now that Adam was gone, one thought remained above all others. Where was Adam going?
Instead of taking his usual nap before dinner, Connor sat down at his desk and did homework to pass the time. Adam showing up in his yard twice rattled his mind. Why had he never seen Adam before? Where did he go in the woods? The other day he had walked almost to the waterfall and there was no sign anyone was living out there. Could it be possible that Adam was living in the woods? Most of all Connor wondered why he was not scared of Adam and why he had not told his mother about their interaction. Any fear that Connor felt of Adam seemed to be overshadowed by his curiosity.
While reading at his desk, Connor found his leg anxiously bouncing up and down, causing his lamp to shake. In between assignments, he looked out his window and for some inexplicable reason expected to see Adam. The more he tried not to think about Adam the more he thought about him. Soon he was unable to concentrate and decided to set the table for his mother.
Downstairs, his mother was cooking a roast chicken and potatoes. Connor didn’t ask if she needed help with the cooking. In the past, his attempts at cutting vegetables ended with a Band-Aid and a delayed meal. Instead he grabbed plates out of the cabinet and proceeded into the dining room, careful to stay out of his mother’s last minute frenzy.
During dinner his father was more vocal than usual, spewing nonsense about corporate tax laws changing for next year and how the President was overtaxing. Connor half listened and smiled and nodded when his father looked toward him. Darcy, however, asked questions and pretended to understand the answers. Connor wondered how smart she would have been if she had gone to college. His father always appeared to know what he was talking about but neither him nor his mother would ever know if the information was incorrect. His mind drifted for a moment imagining how dangerous it would be if all families took their father’s words as truth. Hate could exponentially spread through the world with such little effort. Maybe it already had.
“Connor? Connor? Are you listening?” John furiously questioned, as if Connor’s lack of attention would lead to the world’s end. Connor blinked and found himself staring out the window into the dark at nothing.
“Sorry, I was just thinking.” Connor turned his head back toward his father to find a rather angry expression.
“Thinking about what? Taxes?”
“No, just school stuff.” Connor quickly looked down to his plate to break the tension building as his father continued to scowl at him.
As if his life wasn’t pathetic enough for him to be distracted from homework, now he couldn’t participate in a conversation. What a gloomy life he had.
The next day, Connor woke to his alarm. If he hadn’t stayed up in bed all night thinking, he would have gotten a full eight hours. Connor rushed to get ready for school and headed out the door the moment he finished. He arrived at school early. He sat in homeroom waiting for attendance to start. Alice walked in.
“What’s up with you?” Alice asked.
“Nothing,” he replied.
“You’re never here early, you’re always on time. It’s that benefit you get for living next door. You don’t have to wake up early to catch the loser bus and you don’t have to leave your house early to beat traffic. So the way I see it is something is up,” she explained.
“I woke up before my alarm and couldn’t fall back asleep,” he lied. He never lied to Alice. What was happening to him?
“Well, let’s hang out tomorrow. It’s the weekend and we haven’t talked in awhile.”
“That sounds good. Just call me when you’re ready to hang out.”
“You’re the one who sleeps late so you should probably call me. I’m ready at 8 a.m. I’d say we could grab breakfast in town but you don’t eat breakfast.”
“That’s fine, I’ll call you.”
The homeroom teacher, Mr. Vorheeve, began taking attendance. He was very energetic for his elderly age and did not lack confidence for a man with so little hair. The bell finally rung and classes began. Connor was glad he had plans for the weekend. He wished Alice had classes with him but she was in Advanced Placement classes. Connor never pushed himself or cared enough to take advanced classes. He didn’t regret his decision because it made his life easier.
When what seemed like the longest day of classes in the history of classes was finally over, Connor left his non-advanced classes and headed home.
Today, Connor walked faster than usual. He made his way to his house and standing in his back yard, as he had expected, was Adam. Connor dropped his backpack by the front door and made his way over to Adam.
“What are you doing here?” Connor asked, already knowing the answer.
“I told you. I’m here to ask why you are different.” Adam stood there staring back at Connor expressionless as if his mind was occupied studying him.
“I don’t know you. Why should I tell you if I was different?”
“You look kind so I thought you would tell me if I asked.”
“Well, people don’t normally ask those kinds of questions to people they don’t know. You need to establish a relationship and trust for someone to tell you those things. I don’t know you from Adam.”
“I am Adam,” Adam replied.
“It’s an expression!” Connor shot back.
“Why?” Adam sincerely asked.
“I don’t know, because my dad says it to people. It’s probably old. It’s something that old people say.”
“But you said it,” stated Adam.
“Yes, I did, because apparently I’m an old man. Don’t you see my gray hair and wrinkles?!” He h
ad waited all day to see if Adam was going to be there and now Adam was frustrating him. Never before in his life did he feel so much chaos on the inside and anger on the outside. “Why do you go into the woods?”
“I live there,” Adam replied, as if it were a dumb question.
“Well, you don’t look like you live in the woods except you are wearing the same thing as yesterday. Listen, I can’t answer your question because it’s personal and I don’t know you.”
“Will you tell me if I know you?” Adam seemed excited by this notion as if he had solved a puzzle. Connor felt like he couldn’t hurt Adam’s feelings. For some reason Adam had a naivety about him.
“That’s fine, just stop showing up in my back yard and you probably should change your clothes daily. It’s not that you look dirty but people will get that impression” With that Adam turned and walked into the woods. He turned and waved goodbye excitedly. Connor waved back, still wondering where he was going. Adam didn’t look dirty so where was he sleeping? Why did he keep Adam a secret if the situation could somehow turn dangerous?
That night, Connor’s hands whisked across the pages of his notebook, filling line after line with the emotions and thoughts he kept bottled up. A couple of months had passed since he had last written. Writing was his outlet and kept him from spiraling down into darkness. The people around him all thought of him as normal, plain, unexciting. An illusion he worked to portray as some innate form of protection. In reality, his soul was like a caged butterfly: beautiful, captive, and hidden away from the world.
When he finished writing, he ripped the pages from his notebook and shredded each individually. He flushed the pieces down the toilet, watching as his words, his truth, swirled away forever.
CHAPTER 5
The Meeting
Adam sat on a rotting log deep in the woods, staring into the white and yellow sky. Once the sun seemed high enough in the sky, he headed through the damp woods toward Connor’s house. Once he arrived he stood on the front lawn but no one inside noticed him. Today, he was proud of the navy V-neck shirt he was wearing. He stood patiently, waving at everyone who strolled by. Suddenly a blonde girl was walking down the sidewalk toward him. He was standing in the grass so he concluded he was not in her path.
“Hello,” she said.
“Hello,” Adam replied.
“I’m Alice.”
“I’m Adam.”
“Are you here to see Connor?” she asked.
“Yes, I am waiting for Connor,” Adam replied.
“Does, he know you’re out here?”
“I don’t think so. If he knew he would have come out,” Adam convinced himself.
“Well, let’s go inside. He’s expecting me. He didn’t say anything about you on the phone…”
Alice rang the doorbell. The two stood in awkward silence for a moment before Darcy opened the door.
“Hi, Mrs. London!” exclaimed Alice.
“Alice, how nice to see you! Connor said he was expecting you. He’s upstairs in his room. Who’s your friend here?”
“This is Adam,” she stated, confused for a second but too lazy to correct her.
“Hello there, Adam. It’s nice to see your little group is expanding. You guys can go right up,” Mrs. London said.
Alice and Adam proceeded up the stairs.
“Isn’t that funny?” Adam asked Alice.
“Isn’t what funny?”
“She said guys!” Adam exclaimed, smiling.
Alice rolled her eyes to herself. As they approached the door it opened. Connor stood on the other side. He looked at Alice and then noticed Adam. Does Alice know Adam?
“Come on in guys,” Connor said.
Alice looked over at Adam who was smiling again. She was somehow finding his childish humor insulting. Alice sat on the bed. Immediately after, Adam sat next to her. Connor sat across from them at the computer desk.
“Do you know each other?” Connor asked.
“We briefly met,” Alice answered.
Connor was confused why they had arrived together.
“Connor, I thought we were going to talk today?” Alice said.
“Me too, Connor,” Adam stated.
“Ok, Adam, I didn’t specifically say that or that it would be today. Alice, I was not expecting Adam to be here,” Connor answered timidly.
“He was on your lawn waiting for you,” Alice stated.
“He told me not to wait in the backyard,” Adam responded.
The situation had officially gotten even more uncomfortable.
“Alright, Connor, just call me when you guys are done playing outside on the lawn or whatever. You didn’t even tell me you had a new friend.” Alice got up and walked out. She almost made it to the front door.
“I thought you guys were spending time together today?” Mrs. London questioned.
“The guys are,” Alice replied as she closed the door gently behind her.
Mrs. London shook her head, wondering what had happened.
Connor sat quietly upstairs with Adam. He wasn’t sure what he was supposed to do. He still questioned why Adam was so weird. He wondered if Alice had just let a serial killer into his house.
“Listen, Adam, you can’t be so weird,” Connor explained. “When people hang out they don’t wait on lawns. You set a time and date and meet.”
“I’m sorry. I didn’t realize I was being weird,” Adam said, looking down.
Now Connor felt cruel. He wondered what he was supposed to do with him.
“Do you go to school?” Connor asked.
“Not right now, but I’m going to go to your school Monday, I decided,” Adam replied.
“Ok, that explains why I’ve never seen you before. You haven’t enrolled yet.”
“I want to be your friend,” Adam stated.
“That’s a little forward. I don’t think you should necessarily ask that to any more people,” Connor replied.
“Ok, just you.”
Adam sat waiting for an answer. Connor suddenly realized and replied, “Ok, that’s fine, I can be your friend if you stop being weird.”
Connor decided to take Adam for a walk through town. He showed him the church at the end of the block. Adam stared up at the towering steeple for a long time. The church had a brick front with a tall white steeple. The steeple contained a brass bell for show. When he was young he often wondered how someone climbed all the way up there to ring it. As he grew older he noticed on the very top of the steeple there was a speaker. Connor didn’t understand what Adam was looking at for such a long time. He gently tapped him on the shoulder and signaled to keep walking.
Their next stop was the high school. Connor explained the layout. On each side of the doors was a wing. Directly behind the doors was the lunchroom and administrative offices. From the outside the school didn’t look like anything much. It was also brick with large windows peering into each classroom. The seniors and juniors occupied the East Wing while everyone else got stuck in the West Wing. Connor’s friends often joked the West Wing smelled like body odor. In front of the school lay a circle of grass with a road around it leading up to the entrance and exiting on the other side. A small break in the circular road, on the left side of the high school, led to a parking lot for staff and seniors. On the right side of the high school was the soccer field. Behind it laid the track and the gymnasium. It was a typical small town high school where everything was crammed onto a small piece of property.
Adam didn’t seem to care much about the high school. Connor decided to take him to Main Street, which was only a few blocks past the high school. Main Street was full of pizzerias, a candy store, a music store, and restaurants. All of the kids in town and the adults socialized on Main Street. It was the one place in town people could gather. Adam didn’t say much the whole time. When they walked down Main Street he seemed to stare at people a little more than Connor thought was normal. However, Connor didn’t think Adam was normal.
Their last stop before h
eading home was the local pond. Behind it laid the town pool and a large wooden jungle gym. Connor remembered playing there as a child. Beyond the jungle gym was a sharp slope and beyond that only lay mountains until the next town. The silence was unsettling so Connor decided they needed something to fill it. He decided television was the best option.
When they arrived back at the house, Adam still said nothing so Connor just turned on the television in the living room. He changed the channel to MTV. Adam sat with his eyes fixated on the screen. Connor decided to help his mother set the table so he left Adam in the living room.
“Is Adam new at school?” his mother asked.
“Yes,” Connor replied, unsure if he lied or not.
“That was nice of you to show him around. I can imagine how hard it is for parents to up and move a kid his senior year.”
“I think he’s in shock from it all. He doesn’t say much,” Connor replied.
“Is he staying for dinner? We have plenty.”
“I’ll go check.”
Connor went back into the living room to ask Adam about dinner. He was gone. Connor checked upstairs and then walked the perimeter of the house. He concluded that this situation must be part of Adam’s social awkwardness.
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Alice’s telephone rang. It was finally Connor calling her to come over. She thought it was rude of him to make her wait so long. She yelled to her mother to give her a ride over. Her mother obliged. When Alice arrived Connor was up in his room as usual.
“Why did you call me so late?” Alice asked.
“Adam was here until right before dinner,” Connor responded.
“I feel like I wasted my whole day waiting for you to get done. This was supposed to be our day to talk and now I’m just frustrated,” Alice explained.
“We can still talk. Let’s talk now.”
“You talk! I don’t really have anything to say right now. No, I changed my mind. Who is Adam and where did he come from?”
“He was standing in my backyard the other day and said that he wanted to be friends.”
“Connor, you don’t find that weird that he was in your backyard? What was he doing?”