I couldn’t help but think of the first time I locked her legs in the spreader bar. There was no fumbling now and the voices of nagging insecurity died away. My fingers were moving by instinct, just like those of a musician tuning their instrument.
We’d been through such a long journey together. Yet the end of the road was winding somewhere in the horizon, beyond our reach.
Kat gasped when I placed one final kiss at the top of her spine. That spot always made her wet and needy.
It was time to flip the switch.
“Now get back on your knees with your back straight and your hands extended, palms down.”
Once the riding crop was back in my hand, I made a full circle around her and stared deeply into her reddened eyes. She looked back at me. The only sign of distress was her puffy, tear-marked skin. Her limbs were still, and her stance exuded confidence. I placed the end of the crop under her chin and stroked her softly with it. My favorite deceptive caress.
“We both know you’re a pain slut so whipping you won’t be all that effective, will it?”
“No, sir. I...” A little wicked smile lit her face. “It will feel like a prize.”
“Smart girl.” I nodded in approval but tried to keep my tone as even as possible. This was not Thomas her lover, but her Master and disciplinarian. She’d better wrap her mind around it. I regarded her with what I hoped was a cold stare and slid the crop along her cheek. “So, I’ll use pain as a reward if you are a good girl and do as I say. You will get all the pain and erotic pleasure your heart craves by the end of each day you spend here if you have finished all your tasks.”
“Sir, what will you do to me if I disobey?”
That was the hardest task to think of. I didn’t like my final solution. I’d have to be firm.
“I’ll treat you like you are nothing. I won’t touch you except with my foot. I’ll put you in a chastity belt. I’ll gag you and make you sit in the corner.” I grasped the crop tighter. “I’ll remove your gag only so you can eat from a bowl on the floor like a dog. I won’t speak to you. You’ll also sleep on the floor next to my bed. Would you like that, pet?”
“No, sir.” Her eyes widened in horror at the prospect. For a short moment, I felt triumphant. Finally, a punishment she wouldn’t think of as fun and kinky.
“Then we’re clear.” I kept the cold voice, resisting to the need to comfort her. “Remember, that will only happen if you choose not to follow my rules. You’ll have a say in your schedule, as I don’t want to set you up for punishment. Still, once you agree, it’s law. Understand?”
“Yes, Master,” Kat whispered in a small, scared voice. Her shoulders shuddered for a moment but then she straightened them and looked at me again with bravado.
“Good girl. Now, we’ll start with a few very simple exercises tonight. I’ll ask you questions and when you answer to my satisfaction and I believe you’re being sincere, you will get a smack with the crop as a reward.”
Her face lit up. She confirmed her understanding with an enthusiastic nod and a, “Yes, sir”. That earned her a hit across her left breast and a bright red mark.
“That’s just for incentive.” I lifted her chin again and uttered, “Why didn’t you do your design assignment?”
That caught her off guard. Kat blinked and tried to lower her gaze. I tutted and forced her to look up with the crop.
“No, no, Kat, the old rules still apply. You won’t avoid direct eye contact. I’ll only be satisfied with your answers if you are looking at me. Again, why didn’t you do your assignment? You had more than enough time. You also draw all the time and have a thousand ideas. Why did you fail it?”
“I...” She trembled in discomfort at my hard stare. “I forgot.”
“Really?” I withdrew the riding crop from her face, walked behind her and slid its end along her bare shoulder. “Your most important assignment for the entire year and you just forgot it? You are not that scatterbrained, Kat.”
“I had other things to do,” she said quietly and squeezed her handcuffed palms. “I get distracted easily, and—”
“What got you so distracted?” The crop was teasing her skin and she was beginning to shake again. If I touched her, I’d feel the shivers up her spine.
“I… everything—life, colors, you… I am out of control when I fall in love, and—”
I yanked her hair back and moved closer to her face. My expression must have been firm enough because she squirmed and swallowed.
“Are you trying to blame your Master for your blatant lack of self-control and basic discipline?”
“N-no, Master, no. It is entirely my fault. I’d never—”
She stopped when I tapped my fingers gently on her cheek and let go of her hair.
“Don’t sweat it, pet. I know you’re too busy thinking you’re the worst. Still, I don’t think you’re being sincere. Your reasons are too vague, as if you’re skirting the subject.”
“Master, I have no idea what you expect of me. How can I answer to your satisfaction?”
“Simple. Be sincere and don’t try to hide.” I pushed the riding crop between her legs and rubbed it against her pussy. Kat moaned out when the rough edge made contact with her clit.
When I withdrew my hand, the leather rectangle glistened under the mild light.
“Ah, my little slut, still wet and horny even at such a time. So what, should I ignore my duties to you and simply fuck your brains out? Would it be justified if I abandoned your training to pleasure myself?”
“I… it’s not up to me to judge you, sir,” Kat uttered in confusion. In her mind, she was walking on the edge of a very dangerous abyss. Her voice was getting lower and she blinked, desperate to find the right answer to please me.
“You’re probably right, pet. Let me make this easier for you.” My hand went back to her hair. “You gave yourself to me. I could easily take what is mine. You’ll probably scream for it and cum like crazy. It doesn’t change the fact I’d be ignoring the purpose of what we’re doing here.”
“I… don’t understand.”
“Kat, Kat… My priority is for you to get better at handling your life. It’s important for both of us. If I simply use the next two months for plenty of insane, kinky sex, that would make your submission pointless. I’ll choose to keep control tonight because it is important for me.”
She was still staring at me with a frown.
“Just like your studies were important to you.”
“I’m not sure.”
“Don’t deny it.” I shook my head and yanked her hair harder. “I watched you when you were talking about design. You were burning for it, just like you burn each time you submit. You can’t reject your passion, little one, just like you can’t hide that you long for me to whip you. Is that true?”
“Y-yes, sir. I… It’s my calling.”
Kat never saw the next hit coming and cried in delight when the crop marked her other breast.
“Very well, pet, we’re getting somewhere. There is no way you could have simply forgotten something so important to you, right?”
After making sure her tits were equally bruised, I moved on to stroke between her thighs again.
“I’d buy it if it was a test, or paperwork, or anything mundane. But this? You love designing. I don’t think you forgot. You just hoped it’d go away if you didn’t think about it, didn’t you?”
Kat bowed her head in shame but then raised it with a start.
“Yes, sir.”
“I can see that. My question is why? Give me a straight answer already. You know why, Kat.”
“It’s just so hard to say it.” Tears began rolling down her cheeks.
“Say it.” This time, I teased her sensitive nipples, just light touches enough to make her crave more.
“I was scared. I was terrified of going through this assignment,” she cried. “I’d go outside for inspiration. I’d look at colors, fabrics, patterns, anything to get moving. It seemed… I couldn’t come up
with something that hadn’t been done before. I felt useless.”
I raised a welt on her ass with the next hit. The excitement was bubbling inside my chest when I landed the crop on her butt cheeks with a crack.
“Keep talking. You’re doing well.”
“I fear I’m not good enough. I keep getting those thoughts. There is no way to stop them.” Her beautiful features were twisted in an agonized expression as she said those words. “I try everything—pain, dressing up, smiling, working on every detail of my makeup. It never stops… As if there is a voice in my head.”
A rain of smacks continued on her thighs, her back, her shoulders, as I gave her the reward for her sincerity. The harder I hit and marred her skin, the more words poured out of her lips.
“Sometimes I wake up in the middle of the night and I’m so anxious. I’m suffocating.” Kat arched her back and I ran the crop along her pussy lips. “I can’t stop thinking I’m a failure, that I’m wasting my time and my father was right all along. Some shadow is chasing me… and I have all these thoughts… ideas… wishes… They overcrowd me. I don’t know what to do with them.”
I paused for a moment and stroked her hair gently.
“I have all these tools and no knowledge of how to use them.” Kat sobbed again and pressed against my hand.
“I wish you had told me about it, Kat.” My voice was dripping with sadness when I slipped out of character.
“I’m sorry, Thomas.” She tried to blink the tears away but they were too profuse. “I loved being with you. I was terrified you would leave me if you thought I was an insane bitch.”
I left the crop on the closest chair, leaned forward to kiss her and switched to being her loving boyfriend.
“Kat...” I pressed my face to hers. “You might be a little insane but that’s what I love about you. You don’t even realize it but you made my life better in every way. I’ll never leave you because you are going through hard times. Also...” I kissed her briefly. “You are many things but bitch is not one of them. Please, promise to never hide such things from me again. I’m not asking you as a Master or Dom but as your friend and lover. We can work through it.”
“Thank you,” she whispered simply and kissed me back. I took my time enjoying the taste of her lips but ended the kiss before it distracted me. There was a lot more Kat had to endure before I allowed her a break.
“I know it’s been a rough day but we are not done yet. Tomorrow, I’ll let you rest the entire day. Tonight you need more pain.”
I got up and walked to the table to pick up her nipple clamps. The weights attached to the clovers were heavier than the ones we used during our kink sessions. Kat moved in discomfort and breathed in and out at the sight of those torture devices.
“On your feet, Kat.”
It was difficult for her to get up on her own. She probably spent hours on her knees. The restriction of the cuffs and the spreader bar didn’t make it any easier. Still, I remained in my place, just holding the nipple weights bouncing like a hypnotist’s pendulum.
It was her battle.
After a few tries, she managed to steady herself on her heels and slowly move her knees to lift her lower body. She stood on really shaky feet, and I wrapped my arm around her waist and whispered, “Can you stand, Kat?”
She nodded and shifted her eyes to the shining metal balls in my hand. Without another word, I cupped her left breast and opened the clover, and its sharp teeth sank into the flesh of her sensitive nipple. Kat yelled in genuine pain and shut her eyes.
“You’ll endure it. Embrace the pain like you always do. Give yourself to it. You’ve been through worse.”
I kissed her tears and attached the other clamp to her right breast. She was sobbing and whimpering, trying to adjust her mind to the physical agony. The weights heaved down on her breasts, making them go red with all the blood that flooded them. She was gritting her teeth and doing her breathing exercises. Her body and soul fully succumbed to the sensations.
“Walk to the table and bend over it.” I pointed it out to her. It was only at the other end of the room but with her bound legs and the excruciating pain in her breasts, it might as well have been miles away. Kat stared at me in despair, exhausted and tortured, but I only shook my head. “You can do it, Kat. A little more effort.”
She nodded and took a small step. The metal balls swayed from her nipples. Kat was walking slowly, in an awkward way, with spread legs and immobilized ankles. Each time one of the clamps moved, she winced, gritted her teeth and stopped for a few seconds. I caressed her back when she made those abrupt stops and whispered to her.
“Come on, kitten, just a little more.”
“It’s so difficult,” she whispered and I nodded in understanding.
“It will all get better, Kat. You’ll see.”
If she was cursing me for being so intolerably cruel, she didn’t show it. The girl nodded, blew a tress of hair from her face, and continued.
Finally, Kat got to the table, after a lifetime of baby steps and tortured movements that deprived her of any grace. The moment she pressed her cheek to the tabletop I walked behind her and removed the clover clamps and handcuffs. My hands went back to her sore nipples and caressed them softly while she cried. The pain must have been too much even for her.
“Shh… It’s over, Kat. It’s all over.” I kissed her cheek and whispered, “I’ll be back.”
I took a small bowl of icicles from the freezer and rubbed them against her nipples. She rested her sore wrists on the table.
“Now… I know it will take you a while to make those voices disappear from your mind,” I said and turned her face to me. “But next time you have these intrusive thoughts, think of them as these weights. Remember how hard it was just now. You lived through the moment. In time, we’ll learn to completely cut off those voices in your head.”
Kat nodded with a faint smile. I picked up a new piece of ice from the bucket and brought it to her clit.
“Spread your legs. That’s your little reward for being so brave. Cum as hard as you want and can, little one.”
She obliged more than happily and moaned out loud when my fingers moved the small, smooth piece between her soaked thighs, from the throbbing button of her clit to her ass. Kat closed her eyes and cried when I focused on stimulating her love button.
“Remember...” My lips covered her earlobe. Kat was pressing herself against me. This time her cries were slowly turning into groans of pleasure. “I’m here not only as your Master but as your safe place whenever the world is too much for you. I’m here, Kat.”
She dug her fingers into the table, raised her bruised ass cheeks and pressed her pussy against the ice. Our lips found each other and we shared a passionate kiss as I took her orgasm scream.
“We’ve got a long way to go but I promise I’ll help you get to where you want to be.”
VIII
“Oh, wow, you guys really outdid yourselves,” Kat exclaimed when we walked out on the roof. I nodded and wrapped my arm around her waist. She was looking around with the enthusiasm of a little girl. That gave her the glow that drew people to her. Just a few months ago, during her roughest episodes, all I’d hoped for was that Kat would keep smiling.
She was back to her usual enchanted self and was intoxicating, even more than the sparkling champagne we grabbed from the nearby waiter.
Kat took the flute from the tray in her delicate hand wrapped in a satin glove, and took a generous gulp. I removed wavy hair from her neck and kissed it, my tongue leaving traces of champagne down her skin.
“Careful with the drinks, kitten.” She giggled when I rested my hand on her ass. “I have several special surprises for you later.”
“Oh come on, Thomas, live a little.” Kat leaned her head on my shoulder. “The night is still young. I’m sure I will have more than enough time to get sober.”
I didn’t reply and instead looked down at her. It amazed me how far she had gone from the terrified, crying woma
n kneeling on my floor six months ago.
Over the two months Kat had spent living with me, my every waking moment was occupied with her in some way. It took me a fair bit of effort to come up with a reasonable schedule that wouldn’t overwhelm her but also wouldn’t allow her to slack. To my surprise, she didn’t struggle to surrender control as much as I feared. Kat embraced her role and did exactly as ordered, either because of fear of punishment or out of her natural need to serve. She finished her designs, passed the exams she’d failed and went back to school to finish her studies. Allie helped her get her old job back after I reassured her Kat was just going through some harsh times and was on the mend. If it had been anyone else, I doubted they’d have made such a compromise but she had been one of their most sought after pro subs. Shortly after that, we chose a nice affordable apartment for her and she moved out. My heart ached once I learned how much her old rent was. No wonder she went broke.
The insane shopping sprees didn’t help either.
I had mixed feelings when she left. On one hand, her progress and my contribution to it filled me with pride. On the other, I’d be a liar if I said I didn’t feel relief at not having such a responsibility on my shoulders.
In many ways, Kat was still the same girl I met and fell for, an artistic force of nature who turned my life upside down. Still, the old restlessness and fear she was hiding beneath layers of fake cheer were less and less visible.
She hadn’t fully let go of her insecurities. I really doubted anyone was ever fully free of the nagging voices. Hopefully, Kat had learned how to control them.
Tonight, she looked gorgeous and confident in her small red dress and stockings. The little pendant hanging from her neck, a thin silver chain with a small red ruby, was glowing right over the line of her breasts. I knew it would look great on her the moment I saw it.
Earlier, when Kat and I had entered the office, many of my co-workers had stared at us with shock and some envy. It was more than just a little scratch of my ego. If I still had my high school mentality, that night would have been the triumph of my life—the grand moment when I could show the world what a high-class trophy I got.
Unorthodox Dom: (New Adult BDSM Romance) (The Unorthodox Trilogy) Page 8