by Zen DiPietro
She paused, deciding if she’d reveal her more personal reasons. She added, “People hug me when I leave, and hug me when I return. They miss me when I’m gone. And I miss being here when I’m away. That tells me that I’ve found a home.”
“Do you miss your life at the Keep?”
“No. It’s one thing to have authority over the lives of others. It’s another to have jurisdiction over my own life.”
“Ahh.” Eryl’s body language was confusing. He relaxed, as though he’d heard what he’d wanted to. Yet his shoulders seemed to bow slightly with apprehension. She didn’t know what to make of that.
“Kassimeigh, what conclusion have you come to about why we elders chose to release you from the order? You must have thought about it a great deal.”
“I did, at first. I was hurt and rejected, though objectively I knew that the elders somehow thought it was for the best. It might have been because of my being a manahi. You waited until I was fully trained to release me. You might have thought I had more to offer as a full-time manahi.”
“No. Your being a manahi had no part in it. We were convinced that your training and dedication to the order would prevent any conflicts of interest. You would have remained a shiv first, and a manahi second.”
She kept her casual pose, in spite of the surprise that zinged through her. “Then why?”
“What no one knows is that Eldest Whitmore is having memory issues and wishes to retire. And Elder Marin also wishes to retire.”
“What does that have to do with me?”
“It’s pertinent to both of us, actually. The elders needed two new members to replace those who are leaving.”
Dread welled up from somewhere deep within her. “You were one of the two.” Obviously, since he had become an elder.
“Yes, and they need another. Someone extraordinary. You.”
She felt like he’d shot her in the chest with an arrow. “I couldn’t be an elder. I was young even to be made a justice.”
“You’re right. As you were before, you couldn’t be an elder. You were the perfect shiv. Compliant, centered, dutiful, logical. Your joining at such a young age molded you. But to be an elder, you needed to lose that compliance. You never developed a true sense of independence and individuality. We had to ensure that you did before becoming an elder. You can’t be an elder if you only follow. You must be able to lead.”
“The order cut me loose as a character builder? To make me elder material?”
“To help you grow into who you would have been without the influence of the order. You deserved that chance whether or not you became an elder. We didn’t make our decision lightly, or without consideration for you.”
“You’re saying the order always intended to reacquire me, after I’d developed enough independence to suit them.”
“Yes. We thought it would take longer, but you’ve quickly surpassed our hopes. That only proves how ideal you would be as an elder.”
“Couldn’t the elders have simply given me a leave of a year or two? Expelling me was harsh. Almost brutal.”
“If you’d known you were coming back to the order, your experience would have been different. You would have limited your options, knowing you were only on a timer until your return.”
She knew that was true. “But it was manipulative.”
“Would you have called the elders manipulative a year ago?”
“No.”
“That’s the point, exactly. No one intimidates you anymore, do they? No one inspires deference.”
She considered. “No. I offer courtesy and duty but I defer to no one.”
“Not even your general?”
“I defer to his position as the ranking officer of the Guard. That’s just hierarchy. I don’t defer to Will as a person.”
Eryl simply smiled. He was silent for a few long moments, then asked, “Are you angry with the elders for what we’ve done?”
Was she? She thought it through even as she spoke aloud. “I’m happier now than I’ve ever been, so whatever it took for me to get here was the right path. Anger is irrelevant. Though I admit, I am annoyed by being treated as a child, or a pawn. I feel used.”
“What about the order? Are you willing to return?”
“I committed to the Guard. I have duties here. Even if I could so easily relinquish those duties, I don’t want to. This is my home now and I don’t want to leave.”
“You’ve done good work with the Guard. Your handling of the terrorists was flawless. You proved you were as wise as any elder and as impartial as any justice. But you wouldn’t have to give up your work here. Instead of living at the keep, you could commute when needed. I understand you have a method of travel that is quite fast.”
“How would that work? Elders have always lived at a keep.”
“You’d remain a justice, but wouldn’t be expected to work as one, or fulfill duties at any of the keeps. Unless you chose to. As an elder, you would be subject to no one. You’d have ‘jurisdiction’ over yourself, as you put it. Your only recurring duties would include weekly status meetings that you could do by comm. Special assignments would require sporadic periods of leave from the Guard.”
“I’m not going to ask for sporadic periods of leave. I’m committed to the Guard.”
“I already spoke to Will. If you want to be a shiv and a Guard member, he’s willing to work with that. Actually, having a justice elder as the first officer of the Guard lends a great deal of cachet to the outfit. Think what you could do for them.”
She let that statement ring in the silence of her office for a full minute before she replied. “I should be mad that you talked to Will before coming to see me.”
“But you’re not.”
“I kind of wish I were.” It was the least she could do, given his presumption.
“I’m making our case, Kassimeigh. The elders needed two new replacements. You and I are the ones that need to be there. It’s unanimous. Any other appointment would require months of discussion and wouldn’t be the right fit anyway.”
“No.”
“No?” His eyes widened.
“No.” Her jaw was tight with certainty. She had no doubts.
“No one has ever refused an offer to be an elder.”
“Once again, I make history. I’m getting used to that.”
“Kassimeigh, you’re needed.”
“I’m needed here. And I want to be here. You all took a chance that I would return after you pushed me out, and I’m saying no. Find someone else.”
“There is no one else. Someone young and progressive is needed. Someone extraordinary. You.”
“Not my problem. Sorry.”
Eryl sighed and closed his eyes for a moment. “I wanted you to come back to us because you wanted to. But there’s more. We need your help.”
He looked up. “One of those special assignments I mentioned. Someone has devised a product they call ‘sparkle.’ When breathed, the stuff creates a euphoric feeling. It’s catching on because people, particularly kids, find it fun. The trouble is that some people are also finding it deadly.”
She said nothing, and Eryl leaned forward. “A justice was called out for a dead thirteen-year-old two days ago. She suffered brain damage and died less than an hour after breathing this stuff. No one is talking about who gave her the sparkle.”
“That’s a terrible situation, but I don’t see what it has to do with me.”
“We believe some low-level manahi must be involved in the manufacture of the product. Because of the strict oversight of the pharmaceutical industry, there’s almost no chance of scientific complicity. That makes it very likely that it’s manufactured with mana instead. And no one can do with mana what you can. You’re the one that needs to investigate. You’re the only person on the planet who can be both manahi and justice.”
Some of the anger she lacked before found its way to the surface. Her frustration threatened to boil over and become rudeness that she really didn’t want t
o vent.
“My life is here. That’s all I want.”
“I see.” Eryl stood. “I won’t continue trying to convince you, then. I need to get back to the Northern Keep. It was good to see you, in spite of the circumstances. I’m glad you’re happy.”
She stood, too. “Thank you. And I’m sorry you wasted your time.”
“I didn’t.” He offered her a sad smile, then crossed the room and opened the door. Just before he closed it behind him, he called back into the room, “I left something with Canan, in case you want it. Keep well, and keep in touch.”
“You take care of yourself, too.”
The door closed and Kassimeigh pursed her lips, trying to remember where she’d left off before Eryl arrived. With determination, she worked through the rest of her tasks for the day.
“What do you think it is?” Izzy wondered, poking at the box with her forefinger. Kassimeigh had invited Izzy to her office after she’d finished her work.
“I’m not sure, but I have my suspicions.” Kassimeigh glared at the package. She still hadn’t touched it. It lay exactly where Canan had left it on her desk.
“You could just open it.”
“Then I’d have to know what it was.”
“Good point.” Izzy didn’t press the issue. She crossed her right ankle over her left knee and drummed her hands against the arms of the chair that Eryl had so recently vacated.
“This is why we need you here,” Kassimeigh pointed out. “Who else would stand around scowling at a box with me?”
“You’re right. Now I have to join.”
Kassimeigh tried to figure out if Izzy was joking or serious. Sometimes it was hard to tell.
“I’m serious. Will’s been coaxing me all week. I was just waiting for him to ask one more time, and I was going to finally give in.”
“I’m glad you’ll be here. To celebrate, let’s not tell Will. I’ll suggest that he needs to do something really special to sell you.”
Izzy laughed. “Is that insubordination?”
“Not at all. Will knew who he was hiring as his first. And also who he’s trying to hire as his reader.”
“Well, goody. This is going to be fun.”
Kassimeigh pushed down on the box with the palm of her hand, then sighed and picked it up. She tore the top open and extracted a pile of black cloth and a small digital photo display. With a sense of foreboding, she activated the display. A pretty adolescent girl with brown hair pulled into a clip smiled, caught in a moment of time that would now serve as both a reminder of what was and what would never be. Kassimeigh had never seen the girl before, but she had no doubts as to who it was. She looked into the soft brown eyes of the girl who had died. Eryl knew that she could not let a young girl’s death go unanswered.
She closed her eyes and tamped down the swell of anger and frustration. That new sense of defiance crept up her spine, and she pushed it away too. Later, she would have a chance to unleash those feelings. For now, they were irrelevant. There was only one choice she could make. But that didn’t mean the Council of Elders would get what it expected. She’d be writing her own rules from now on.
Two hours later, she swung her pack onto her back, careful not to disturb her sword sheath. She closed the door of the room she shared with Arc and rested the palm of her hand against it for a moment before striding down the hallway. Clad from neck to toe in justice black, she felt complete for the first time in months. Even when she hadn’t owned the title of Justice, she’d still been a justice, in her heart.
Now she’d be one on her own terms. Once she was consecrated as an elder, they could make no rules for her. Could not use her. She had a family to protect within this fortress, and if anyone used someone, she’d be the one doing it. She smiled, certain that the elders had not foreseen the end result of their manipulation.
Her boots made decisive claps against the stone floor and she felt the aura of authority surrounding her as she turned a corner. It felt more than good. It felt familiar, yet new, and satisfyingly dangerous.
A new recruit emerged from the opposite direction, saw her, and froze in place. The only things that moved were his eyes, darting around, seeming to search for some hole to dive into. No luck for him there, so he just stood there looking like an idiot. She offered him a nod of acknowledgement and continued on her way.
As she stepped out of the fortress, she saw a crowd had gathered. She touched hands as they were extended to her when she passed. Everyone seemed to want to give her their best wishes. She knew they wanted to show their support for her change of circumstances, but it gave her departure an odd sense of finality that she didn’t like.
When she clasped Justin’s hands, he gave hers an extra squeeze of support. Azure and Carston stood together, and both offered warm regards. Most of the people who had gathered to see her off had known her as a shiv and therefore weren’t taken aback by her appearance and all that it implied. A few newly recruited gawkers stood on the fringes, and they’d have to work on processing their commander’s new dual role. That would be their problem. She had plenty of her own.
As she traveled down the line of well-wishers, she saw that Will and Arc stood with Izzy alongside her kite.
“I’d almost forgotten this version of you,” Will teased as he enveloped her in a hug. “I’ll keep you apprised via the comm. Don’t worry about not being here, but get back as soon as you can. I’m proud of you.” Not many people would hug a justice, and Kassimeigh suspected that the astute general was making a silent statement to the gawkers in the crowd.
“Thanks, Will.”
“Let us know if we can do anything to help,” Izzy insisted, bestowing her own hug.
“I will. I might be calling on you, in particular, very soon.”
The last goodbye was the hardest. It shouldn’t be. She didn’t plan to be gone for long. Still, there was a sense of change on her, as though she had one foot in her current life and one foot poised to step forward. She just didn’t know what she was walking into or where to put her balance.
Arc took both of her hands in his and kissed her knuckles. “Be careful. And kick some ass.” He wrapped his arms around her torso and held her tightly for a moment, then released her. “I’ll see you soon,” he whispered in her ear.
There were too many words in her head, and they were all too small. She simply pressed her hand to his chest, and they both felt the buzz that came from their bond. She knew he understood.
“Keep me posted on things here,” she directed authoritatively. She scrutinized the group that had gathered to see her off. “If things fall apart in my absence, I’ll have to work you doubly hard when I get back.”
Groans and good-natured chuckles answered her. She stepped down and crossed to her kite. She took a good look around at her best friends, her troops, and her fortress. Whatever happened in the coming days, this was home, and she’d be back here as soon as she could.
She settled herself, waved, and took off for the Northern Keep.
Message from the Author
Thank you for reading!
I hope you enjoyed Guardians of Terath: Facing Fortune. I’m excited about the way the characters developed after Seeking Sorrow, as well as the events that have been put into motion for the third book in this series, Breaking Bard.
I’d love to hear your input, and I’m curious about what you expect or hope to see in future books in the series. You never know . . . your feedback could have a direct effect on the next book. Inspiration comes from everywhere and you might just be my next muse.
Please visit me at my blog: www.WomenOfBadassery.com. I would absolutely love to hear from you there or at [email protected].
Finally, I’d like to ask you a favor. I did the writing, but you are the one with the power to make or break this book. Authors live and die by reviews, so I would be grateful if you could write a review for me at Amazon and/or Goodreads. Just a couple minutes of your time would mean so much to me.
I hope to
hear from you!
In gratitude,
Zen DiPietro
Contents
Facing Fortune
Copyright
Pronunciation Guide
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Message from the Author