by Cynthia Dane
There will be plenty of time for that bullshit when I willingly let myself be collared for three whole days, starting Wednesday night.
I guess I’ll find out if I really do understand where women like Nova are coming from.
Chapter 6
IAN
God help me, I’m more excited than a boy leaning how to drive or going to his first rock concert.
More excited than a boy stealing his dad’s car and winging how to drive so he can sneak off to his first rock concert. Not that I know anything about that…
You see, it’s Wednesday. The day Katie is going to put on her collar and not take it off for a whole three days. Her body won’t be the only thing that’s mine. She’ll do anything I command – within reason – learning how to serve as well as submit.
Not just sexually.
Beyond sexually.
As I’ve told you before, I don’t think much about living the BDSM life full time. I know plenty of couples who do that and are very happy. I’ve said before that I think it could be draining and even limiting – from my end. That’s why I think three days is a good limit. Katie can handle three days, and that’s probably about as long as I can handle too.
Fuck I’m excited!
I haven’t seen her all day. She’s working, but she’s taking care of certain matters on the other side of town while I continue to oversee the remodel at The Grand. I won’t see her until after dinner. She’s coming to my place with an overnight bag full of day clothes and a few other things I’ve asked her to bring.
I mailed her the collar, requesting she show up wearing it. Any inhibitions needed to be dealt with before she arrived. And yes, she had a few. During a phone call last night she requested that I give her an hour or two a day to take off her collar and recharge. I was glad she had that kind of foresight. It’s important she take care of herself like that.
It makes me even more excited. You have no idea.
Dinner is take-out again. Valerie joins me in my kitchen, where we discuss her family life and talk briefly about mine. I haven’t told anyone about Kathryn, although I think my assistant suspects it. She’s quick like that.
“That Kathryn Alison sure gives you a run for your money,” she says with a twinkle in her eye. “That kind of woman could be good for you.”
Don’t I know it.
Valerie leaves a half hour before Kathryn is due to arrive. I do some light cleaning, as I always do before my Katie is scheduled to come to me for more than work chat. Far from the first time, and don’t get me wrong… I love dimming the lights, lighting a few scented candles, and straightening up my couch to get ready for some serious boyfriend-girlfriend stuff.
Are we boyfriend and girlfriend? I suppose.
The doorbell rings right at eight. I put on a spritz of cologne, enough for Kathryn to notice, and go to answer the door.
I’m not disappointed.
She’s dressed as I requested, in a T-shirt and cotton shorts, her strappy sandals cute and her ponytail youthful. I’m sure she felt silly going between her apartment and my condo in that.
What gets me, however, is the collar twinkling around her throat. The moment I see it, I have to contain what I’ve got going on in my pants. No sense losing it all right now. I’m a bit… sore about that sort of thing.
Especially around Kathryn Alison, collared or not.
“Katie,” I say, opening my door so she can come in. “Good to see you.” She drags in her overnight bag and waits for me in the living room. “Did you bring everything you need?”
Silence spreads between us. Silence, aside from the cat yowling in the corner of the room because there’s a damned visitor. We both look at Saoirse, who quickly realizes she’s not going to get the due attention she thinks she deserves and saunters into the library.
The silence continues.
The corner of Kathryn’s mouth twitches. Starting three or so weeks ago, she readily put on the collar and played out a scene for an hour or two. I’m asking for a lot more now. We’re going to be having a full scene for the next three days. So now I get to see that hint of rebellion in her face again.
I love it. Never before have I had a sub who resisted me so much at times. Not that I want her to actually resist me. That’s not a good sign of a woman enjoying herself – not unless she gets off on that kind of behavior. Those women are rare, in my experience, and Katie is certainly not one of them.
Our eyes lock from across the room. She’s dressed like a petulant girl, but I know that her heart beats with purpose and her mind is ticking away, thinking about everything I could possibly do to her – to humiliate her.
I want to assure everyone that I am not into humiliation, per se. I don’t get off on lowering women in status and watching them struggle for their bearings. It’s one thing to challenge a sub’s way of thinking, to open her mind to a new world of endless, sexual possibilities. It’s quite another to make her feel embarrassed and hate herself.
There’s no good in that.
I like to think that by this point Kathryn knows I’m not like that. I’m not going to debase her for my amusement. I’m not going to ask more from her than I know she can handle. Sure, I may overestimate her current mental abilities, but I would never, ever make her negatively uncomfortable on purpose. I want her to enjoy these next three days. It will be a bit rough at first, sure, but eventually…
Eventually she’ll find the joy in it.
“I brought everything… sir.”
What a bite.
“Good. You can put your bag in the bedroom. Did you eat dinner?”
She picks up her overnight bag and heads to my room. “Yes,” she says. “Did you?”
I don’t answer. She’s in the other room, anyway, putting her things away. I go into the kitchen and pour glasses of Chardonnay. When I look up, Kathryn is standing on the other side of my island counter, her countenance stern and her lips pursing to the point of absurdity.
“Well?” she says, hands on her hips. “What do you want of me, sir?”
Sarcasm. Her favorite defense mechanism.
“Relax, darling.” Oh, I’m getting defensive too. I want to defend my honor as a man. And as a Dom? I want to put her in her place. Yet I know that’s not a good idea at the moment. “No need to be on edge.” I hold up the cider. “Wanna watch something on TV?”
Her mouth twists in disbelief. Yes, Kathryn, thus far every time you get collared, we have sex. I’m sorry, however, I can’t have sex for three days straight. Maybe you can…
“Do I get a choice, sir?”
“You always have a choice.” She’s starting to get on my nerves. Kathryn the Domme is here, not Katie my sweet sub.
Good thing I don’t plan on any sex tonight.
Does that surprise you? Here I was, all excited today because I get Kathryn any way I like for the next three days. My cock’s been like a little springboard ever since I woke up this morning. All right, so that’s par for the course for a man my age. Morning wood, say hello to the world! But this fucker – literally – is unrelenting. He wants nothing more than to drive long and hard into Kathryn’s cunt. He’s a crude boy.
Thankfully, I am a man. A man who knows how to hold himself back.
I’ve already decided that we’re not having sex today, no matter how much I want to bend her over my couch and fuck us both senseless. I’m practicing everything I know about self-control as I take her hand and bring her to the couch, where I give her Chardonnay to help her ease into her role. There’s nothing on TV, so I put in a movie. Nothing sad. Nothing overly funny. A run of the mill drama that hinges on beautiful scenery more than it does story.
Because neither of us are paying attention.
Kathryn is waging a war in her mind, like the first and second nights she submitted to me. I understand. Okay, I don’t understand, but I understand this is something she has to go through. Whatever she’s thinking, I hope it ends in both of our fav
ors.
I put my arm around her. I hold her close to me. I almost take off her collar so she’ll feel more comfortable. After thirty seconds or so, however, she relaxes, placing her hand against my chest and drawing her legs up onto the couch.
This is a position she would have chosen with the collar on or not. It’s not necessarily submissive, but in our current states of minds, it is. She’s deciding to trust me. She’s lowering her guards. She’s making me feel like a king without realizing it.
Maybe not a king. More like a protective knight.
Kathryn is a fragile woman. She won’t let you think it easily, but I can tell. I can see it within her. By now, I like to think I know her well enough to know this about her. No matter how much she postures, talks smack, or glares at me, I know that deep inside she’s as fragile as any other human being. She wants to trust. She wants to fall in love.
She wants to submit.
Katie, the whole point of the final part of your training is to help you see what you’re capable of. What you can feel when you finally let yourself go. And I mean go. It’s not enough to put on a collar two hours a week and not feel guilty about me tying you up, spanking you, and sinking my cock as deep as it can go. You need to completely let go and put your life in my hands.
In turn, I will be testing my limits as a Dom who swears to protect and take care of his sub.
You’re a woman worthy of taking care of, my sweet.
“How are you feeling?” I ask toward the end of the movie, my hand sneaking up her shirt and stroking the small of her back. I intend to be soothing, not sexual, but I feel her body tense, becoming alert to my intimate touch. “We should probably go to bed soon.”
It’s not even ten, but I’m tired. I don’t doubt that Kathryn is too, what with running around town all day while dealing with her mental battles. Nothing sounds better than holding her in my arms in bed, drifting off to sleep with the scent of her shampoo in my nose.
Well, that and sex, but like I said, that’s not happening tonight. I want her completely relaxed before tackling that in this context.
Kathryn lifts her head, hand pushing against my chest. “I’m fine. I suppose we could go to bed…”
Her voice is heavy. No matter how many reassurances I give her tonight, she needs me to audibly say it.
“No sex.” I stroke her hair, so fine and soft between my fingers. “Let’s get ready for bed and go to sleep. Tomorrow, we’ll talk more about what’s going to happen through Saturday.”
Kathryn doesn’t know it, but we have a date that evening to round out these BDSM festivities.
“All right.”
If she had asked to have sex anyway, that may have swayed me to make love to her. Except she didn’t ask that, and I didn’t think she would.
I clean up in the living room as she gets ready for bed in my bathroom. The faucet runs. She brushes her teeth and washes her face. She’s adorable in her shirt and shorts, the ponytail swishing back and forth as she dries her face with a small towel.
My hand brushes against her ass as I approach the sink. She stiffens. “Why don’t you go turn down the bed while I freshen up in here?”
She glances at me in the mirror. A flash of “Why don’t you go jump off a cliff?” is in there, but I ignore it. Be feisty, Kathryn. That only makes it more fun when I finally fuck you.
By the time I finish in the bathroom, Katie has completely turned down the bed and is about to get in her side by the window. Before she put her knee on the mattress, however, I say, “Take off the shorts. And the underwear.”
She stops, glaring at me, saying nothing. In time, she slips off, putting her thumbs in the elastic of her cotton shorts and shoving them toward the carpet. The underwear goes with them, until she’s completely bare from the waist down.
I’m also in a T-shirt and boxers, my usual fare for sleep when I’m not going naked. I turn off my light and climb into bed, inviting her to join me.
She probably wonders why I asked her to get naked down below. She doesn’t ask, however. Yet I give her a short spiel about wanting to feel her skin against mine as we sleep.
I mean… there’s a lot of truth to that.
I also am a man with a lot of kinky plans.
Chapter 7
KATHRYN
Sex dreams don’t come to me often, but when you’ve been denied sex by a man like Ian Mathers, you’re gonna dream about fucking somebody.
Guess who is in my sex dream. Hilariously enough, it’s not Ian. No, it’s the guy from The Dark Hour. The one Nova walked away with and got to intimately know against a wall.
Apparently, I thought he was hot.
“Kathryn,” he says with a purring accent. “Let’s go away, you and me. I’ve got a private jet. Anywhere in the world. Brazil, Singapore, Tahiti… what is your poison, my beauty?”
I’m putty in his hands, my giggles piercing my own brain and my body begging him to fuck me. I don’t think it has anything to do with the man himself. I could be dreaming about any hot guy. All that matters is that my brain has nothing to do with Ian right now.
Ew, Ian.
“That’s right, precious kitten.” The man strokes my cheek and brushes his hand against my hard nipple. “Don’t think about that man. Think about anyone but him. It’s time you try on a new Dom for size.”
A new Dom.
Hey, sleeping-sex-dream Kathryn is all about getting her a new Dom to try out everything she knows on.
The man lures me down onto a couch, his breath hot against my skin. Fingers roll against my nipples. My legs are parted. Kisses cover my shoulder, my back, my cheek. His weight is pushing against me, his cock thick and hard as it rubs along my ass.
I see daylight.
My eyes are slowly opening, the handsome foreign man disappearing from my dream. I’m still awake – sexually, anyway. My body calls to be touched.
And it is.
There are hands on me. That wasn’t a dream. Neither were the kisses as they pepper my skin and roll into my ear.
Ian.
It’s God-fucking-knows-o-clock, and Ian Mathers is rubbing against me in bed, his cock about to penetrate me.
“Shh,” he says, clasping his hand over my mouth. The other cups my breast, rolling my nipple between forefinger and thumb. My unclothed pussy is wet, and I don’t know if it’s from my sex dream or from Ian manipulating me in my sleep.
My God.
This was in that letter he sent me. “You will be available to me at all times of day. Even when you’re asleep.” Boy, I guess so. I remember thinking the idea was hot, but didn’t think he would actually do it.
I very rarely have morning sex outside of some fingering and oral. Actual sex with a man’s cock is usually out of the question, because who wants to deal with that waking up?
Apparently I do.
This should be against everything I hold dear as a woman. Namely, my bodily autonomy. Did I tell Ian it was okay to awaken me with sex? Inadvertently. Was he going to have sex with me while I was asleep? Well, he said he might. Do I want to know the answers to these questions?
Yes. And no.
I don’t think he would have done something so heinous. Not only because nothing about his previous behavior says otherwise, but also because he’s only going for it now that I’m awake.
The dream world. Reality. Who knows which one came first. Was I having a sex dream because Ian was stimulating me in bed? Or was I already horny as fucking hell because I thought I was going to have sex last night and then didn’t at all?
Furthermore, who the fuck cares?
Coming out of a dream world means I’m existing on the border between illusion and reality. Everything my body feels is absolutely real. However, it’s amplified by my sleepy mind, a mind that is quickly awakening thanks to the hand silencing my moans and the other hand squeezing my breasts and rubbing the inside of my bare thigh. My senses are heightened. I can barely believe this is
happening, since it still feels like a dream.
His breath against my skin. His quiet groans in my ear. The way he presses against me from behind, his hands grabbing everything, keeping me silent. The rest of him getting ready to take me and use me any way he pleases.
“You will be available to me.” I really am his doll.
I don’t care.
It’s not a joke when I say this is fucking hot. Maybe it’s my sleep-addled brain making me think that, but hey, I’ll take it. I’ve never been woken up with sex before. I never thought I would like it. Yet I trust Ian, and when he strokes my slit, neither of us are surprised when I’m wet enough to do whatever he wants.
Shit, like nobody knows what he wants.
He doesn’t say a thing, let alone good morning, as he lifts my left leg and presses the head of his cock into my wetness. I moan into the palm of his hand, watching the morning sunlight ascend through the bedroom window as he slowly slips into me, filling me at this ungodly hour.
Once I’m too full to take more of him at this angle, he pulls out, muttering something that I can’t comprehend into my ear.
Before I know it, Ian slams back into me, shaking my body, flinging my leg over his hips, and using his free hand to snake beneath my shirt and squeeze my breast as hard as he dares.
In my current state, it’s almost overwhelming.
The man doesn’t even touch my clit, and yet I’m halfway to squealing in his hand, my body overcome with desire and pleasure. I don’t know where he got so much energy this early in the morning, but he’s not letting up. I jerk in his embrace from the force of his strength. I cower beneath his hand, sinking deeper into his arms, against his body, willing more of him into me as he takes me, over and over.
“You’re mine,” I feel in his movements. “This is what you were made for. You don’t need to worry about anything else. Let go and indulge in the moment.”
Do you think that’s what he means when he does this? Or is he a horny fucker using me like a convenient blow-up doll?
“Katie.” That’s the only word I hear from him before he fucks me harder, his cock impaling me from behind, reaching deep, deep within and threatening to split me in two. I close my eyes, blotting out the sun, welcoming the darkness of my dream world.