Sean's Reckoning

by Sherryl Woods

  “But I’ll only go if you will,” she’d told Deanna not ten seconds ago.

  Now Ruby and Sean sat side by side awaiting Deanna’s decision.

  “And this is all about Hank?” Deanna asked, her gaze on Sean’s face.

  “Absolutely,” he said. “Taking time off is hard on him, especially when he can’t get around all that well. Hank’s an active guy. Forced immobility will make him impossible to live with.”

  She grinned. “So you want us around to be a distraction for an incredibly cranky man? Sounds like fun.”

  “Oh, I think I can guarantee his mood will improve with you ladies underfoot, Ruby especially.”

  “Charlotte will have a cow if the two of us ask for vacation at the same time,” Deanna said to Ruby. “You know she counts on you to fill in for me if I so much as go to the ladies’ room.”

  “She can hire a temp,” Ruby countered. “The firm can afford it. Hodges has won two huge settlements in the past week.”

  “Not to change the subject, but speaking of settlements,” Sean said to Deanna, “what’s he done for you lately? Has he managed to get you a dime from that irresponsible landlord of yours?”

  Deanna thought back to the conversation she’d had with her boss just two days ago. She’d kept the news to herself, because she could hardly believe it was going to happen. “He settled,” she confessed. “The check’s supposedly in the mail.”

  Ruby whooped and ran over to give her a hug. “Way to go, Dee! How much?”

  “Not a fortune,” she said, trying to caution Ruby against getting too excited. “But five thousand dollars will go a long way toward getting Kevin and me a place of our own and a little bit of furniture.”

  “Is Hodges taking a cut?” Sean asked suspiciously.

  She shook her head. “Not a dime. I offered, but he said I deserved a lot more, so he wasn’t taking any of it.”

  “Well, well, well, a lawyer with a conscience. I’m impressed,” Sean said.

  “Don’t be,” Ruby said wryly. “All he did was make a couple of threatening phone calls to the guy. He didn’t even waste any corporate stationery.”

  “Well, whatever he did, it worked and I’m grateful,” Deanna said. She looked at Sean. “So your timing couldn’t be better, actually. I was thinking that Kevin deserved a vacation before summer’s completely over, and that I’d use a little of this money to pay for a couple of days at the beach.”

  Sean’s expression brightened. “You’re saying yes?”

  “Yes,” she said, unwilling to think about the prospect of spending several lazy nights in Sean’s company on a romantic, moonlit beach. “But we’re chipping in for part of the expenses.”

  “Absolutely not,” Sean said, his jaw set stubbornly.

  “Absolutely yes,” Deanna said just as firmly.

  “Can we dicker over the finances later?” Ruby begged. “I want to go tell Hank.”

  “Go,” Sean and Deanna said in unison.

  Sean chuckled. “I think we can finish this discussion without bloodshed.”

  Deanna frowned at him. “Don’t count on it.”

  Ruby shook her head. “Can you two play nice, or do I need to send Kevin in here to referee?”

  “We’re two civilized adults. We’ll be fine,” Sean reassured her.

  “One of us is civilized. The other one is stubborn as a mule,” Deanna countered.

  When Ruby had gone, Sean met Deanna’s gaze. “I’m glad you said yes.”

  Her heart flipped over in her chest at the heat that rose in his eyes. “Sean, we’re not going to be alone out there.”

  “I know that, but I imagine we can steal a few minutes to ourselves from time to time.”

  “To do what?”

  He drew her to her feet and into his arms. “This,” he murmured, kissing her until her toes curled.

  “And no more,” she said in a shaky voice.

  “And no more,” he agreed solemnly, then grinned. “At least not the first night.”

  Anticipation shot through her, tempered only by a stern reminder that this was going to be essentially a family vacation with lots of people under that same roof. Sean would never pressure her into turning it into something else, not with Kevin just down the hall.

  But he might tempt her, she thought, glancing into his eyes. They were sparkling with pure mischief. Oh, yes, he was definitely going to tempt her. And she was going to have to draw on an already overtaxed reserve of willpower to resist. Heaven help her! It was going to be a really, really long and dangerous week.

  Chapter Eleven

  The house in Truro was covered in soft-gray shingles that had been weathered by countless storms. The shutters were white, and window boxes full of bright flowers hung on the railing around the porch. The house was within sight of the beach dunes, and, with the windows open, a salty breeze wafted through the bright, cheerful rooms. Deanna had never seen such a lovely place. It reminded her of a house her parents had rented years ago at the Jersey shore, but this one was smaller, cozier.

  “Hey, what was that look about?” Sean asked, regarding her with concern. “You looked so sad all of a sudden.”

  She forced a smile. “Just thinking about a time long ago and far away.”

  “Did it involve Kevin’s father?” he asked.

  She heard the tension in his voice and quickly reassured him. “Absolutely not. Frankie and I never went on a vacation.”

  “Your parents, then?”

  She sighed at the accurate guess. “Yes.”

  “You don’t say much about them. Are they dead?”

  “To me,” she said softly, unable to stop the tears that welled up in her eyes. She’d told herself a thousand times that what had happened years ago didn’t matter, but there was an ache in her heart that never seemed to go away.

  Sean frowned. “What does that mean?”

  “They didn’t approve of me marrying Frankie. We haven’t spoken since,” she said, giving him the short, unemotional version that omitted all of the rage and accusations that had left her feeling raw and anguished on the day she had walked out of their house for the last time. The fact that their concerns had been well-grounded was something she still hated to admit.

  Sean regarded her with surprise. “You never told them he’d left you?”

  She shook her head. “At first I kept silent because I didn’t think I could bear to hear them gloat over having been right about him. Then it became a matter of pride. I didn’t want to go to them when I needed help.”

  “Do they know about Kevin?”

  “No.”

  She saw the war of emotions on Sean’s face. “You realize who’s hurt most by that, don’t you?”

  She refused to acknowledge that her son could be hurt by the absence of two people he’d never even known.

  “Deanna, you need to contact them,” Sean said. “Give them another chance.”

  She leveled a look straight into his eyes. “The same way you’ve given your parents a second chance?”

  Sean winced at the comparison and his jaw set. “It’s not the same thing,” he insisted. “I don’t even know where my parents are.”

  “One of these days you will. Ryan’s determined to find the whole family, isn’t he? What will you do then?”

  “We’re not discussing my family,” he said tightly, “we’re talking about yours. Kevin ought to have a chance to know his grandparents and vice versa.”

  “You’re setting a double standard, and you know it,” she accused, hurt that he, of all people, didn’t understand why she might never want to see her parents again. They’d made the decision to turn their backs on her. She’d asked nothing from them but their love, and they’d withheld it. How was that any better than what his parents had done?

  Hurling the one comment guaranteed to infuriate him, she said, “Besides, this is none of your business.”

  With that she whirled around, shouted for Kevin and headed for the beach at a brisk pace. She wasn’t su
rprised when Sean didn’t bother to follow. After all, she’d just slammed a door very firmly right in his face.

  Sean had had no idea that he and Deanna had so much in common. Granted the break with her parents had come when she’d been an adult, and she’d made her own choice about it, choosing Frankie Blackwell over her family, but the fact was, they were both facing a future without the people who had given them life. If he wasn’t anxious to change that in his own situation, why was he so insistent that Deanna should be? Was it because he wanted for her—for Kevin—what he wasn’t willing to fight for for himself?

  He heard the thump of Hank’s cane hitting the porch, but he refused to turn around. He wasn’t sure how much his friend had overheard, but knowing Hank, it had been enough to ensure that he’d have an opinion to offer. Probably one Sean had no desire to hear.

  “It’s going to be a long week, if you don’t go after her and apologize,” Hank said, coming up to lean on the railing next to him.

  “Why should I be the one apologizing?” Sean grumbled, even though he knew the answer as well as Hank did.

  Hank grinned. “Maybe because she’s right. You set impossibly high standards for everyone else when it comes to family, but you don’t exactly apply the same rules to yourself. How many times have you even seen Ryan since you were best man at his wedding?”

  “We’re both busy,” Sean said defensively.

  “The man owns a pub,” Hank retorted. “You know where to find him any night of the week.”

  Sean had no argument for that. “Deanna just took me by surprise. I had no idea that she was on the outs with her family. I assumed she didn’t have any, since she’d never mentioned them.”

  “You don’t mention yours, but they’re out there,” Hank reminded him.

  Sean scowled at him. “You are so damned annoying when you find a chink in my armor.”

  Hank grinned. “We live to serve. Go after her. I don’t think I can stand an entire week of you two dancing around each other. Besides, it’ll ruin the romantic vibes.”

  Sean glanced pointedly toward the door. “Speaking of romantic vibes, where is Ruby?”

  “Hiding in her room,” Hank said. “Upstairs. She refused to take the one next door to mine on the first floor. She left it for you.”

  “Sorry.”

  “Me, too. The thought of looking up into your ugly mug if I call out in the middle of the night is not exactly the scenario I envisioned when we came out here.” His expression brightened. “But I’m confident I can get her to change her mind eventually. I’m impossible to resist when I really put my mind to it.”

  Sean studied him curiously. “Is this just about sex? Is that all you were hoping for this week?”

  Hank shrugged, looking more at a loss than Sean had ever seen him. “Hell if I know. That woman has more excuses for keeping me at arm’s length than any female I ever met.”

  Sean chuckled at the confirmation that Ruby wasn’t sleeping with Hank. “She still has your undivided attention, though, doesn’t she? In my book, that makes her the smartest woman you’ve ever dated.”

  Hank didn’t seem impressed by his analysis.

  “What about you and Deanna? Anything going on?”

  Sean wasn’t particularly happy at having the tables turned on him. “No,” he said succinctly. “Mutual decision.”

  “Yeah, right,” Hank said skeptically. “If it’s mutual, it’s only because you’re scared. Are you finally in over your head?”

  Sean thought about the feelings that welled up in him every time Deanna walked into a room. Some were familiar—attraction, heat, lust. And some were emotions that usually sent him racing in the opposite direction—vulnerability, protectiveness, a longing for the kind of future he’d never allowed himself to imagine before.

  “Getting there,” Sean admitted aloud for the first time. He sighed heavily. “Guess I’d better go find her and apologize.”

  “If you want to do it right, you can always send Kevin back up here. Ruby will be glad of the chaperon.”

  Sean laughed. “Poor kid. He has no idea the heavy burden he’s carrying on his shoulders this week.”

  “Probably best to keep it that way,” Hank said. “Or you’ll have something else you’ll need to apologize to Deanna for.”

  “I think there’s enough crow on my plate for now,” Sean said, then headed off to get his first taste of it.

  He found Deanna walking along the beach, shoulders slumped, hands tucked in the pockets of her light windbreaker. Kevin was running head of her, ducking in and out of waves as they splashed against the shore. The look on his face was one of pure joy. Whatever else came out of this week, Sean was glad he’d been a part of giving the boy this happy memory. As a kid, he’d always managed to get sick on the day everyone in school was supposed to talk about their summer vacation. He’d hated that he never had anything to talk about while everyone else shared stories about their weeks at camp or trips to the beach, to ball games or amusement parks.

  Kevin looked up, spotted Sean and gave a shout, then began racing toward him. Sean saw Deanna’s shoulders stiffen perceptibly, but she stopped and turned to wait for Sean. Even if she wasn’t quite literally coming back to meet him halfway, it was something. He had to give her credit for not backing down from the encounter.

  “I’m sorry,” Sean mouthed silently as he scooped Kevin high in the air and perched the boy on his shoulders.

  Deanna’s serious expression didn’t acknowledge the apology, but some of the tension seemed to drain out of her.

  “How’s the water?” he asked.

  “Cold,” she said, just as Kevin shouted, “It’s great! Can we go swimming?”

  Sean looked to Deanna.

  “I’m not going in there,” she said with a shiver.

  Sean laughed. “Then I guess it’s just you and me, buddy. You wearing your suit?”

  “No,” Kevin said, clearly disappointed.

  “Run on up to the house and change, then,” Sean said. “Your mom and I will wait right here.”

  A flicker of dismay crossed Deanna’s face, but she didn’t argue.

  After Kevin had gone, Sean repeated his apology, trying to explain his attitude toward his own family, an attitude he admittedly tried never to examine too closely.

  “I know your heart’s in the right place, that you’re thinking about Kevin,” Deanna conceded when he finished. “But when it comes to my folks, you don’t know what you’re talking about.”

  “I know.”

  “Then you’ll drop it?”

  “If it will wipe that frown off your face, yes.”

  A smile trembled at the corners of her mouth.

  Sean reached over and touched a finger to her lips. “Much better.” Then he leaned down and kissed her, just a quick, gentle kiss to remind himself of the taste and feel of her mouth beneath his.

  Huge mistake. He wanted so much more, but Kevin was screaming his name and tearing across the sand, dragging a towel behind him. Sean’s only consolation was the unmistakable shadow of regret in Deanna’s eyes, too.

  “I don’t see why anyone would want to dig for clams,” Kevin grumbled. “It’s hard work, and they’re yucky.”

  “Not when they’re in a big bowl of New England clam chowder,” Sean assured him.

  Deanna grinned at the pair of them. The clam digging had been Sean’s brilliant idea. She was stretched out on a blanket nearby listening to the two of them grumble. The sun was warm against her skin. After only a couple of days, Kevin’s hair was turning lighter and his skin was developing a faint tan, except for his nose which had gotten sunburned the first day out. He looked healthy and happy as he knelt on the sand beside Sean, digging haphazardly with his small shovel.

  The setting was idyllic, even if being around Sean 24/7 was beginning to take a toll on her nerves. It had been difficult enough to resist him in the city, where she only had to contend with the sight of him in tight T-shirts and snug jeans. Out here, even on th
e chilliest mornings, he was usually wearing shorts and a T-shirt. More often than not he wore only his bathing suit, exposing more taut, bare skin than she’d been exposed to in years. The temptation to rest her hand against his bronzed chest, to trace the hard muscles in his arms or the six-pack of sculpted muscles on his abdomen was nearly irresistible.

  If Sean was having similar difficulty keeping his hands to himself, she wasn’t aware of it. He seemed perfectly content jogging along the edge of the water with Kevin running along beside him or engaging in a cutthroat game of cards with Kevin and Deanna in the evening while Hank and Ruby disappeared into town.

  This was what marriage to a man like Sean would be like, Deanna realized with a sudden burst of awareness. Slow, quiet days together as a family, accompanied by the edgy thrill of anticipation. Of course, if they were married, there would be an end to the sensual torment. They could spend the entire night making wild, passionate love to each other, satisfying this longing that never quite left her.

  Deanna was so shaken by the image that she inadvertently dropped the can of soda in her hand. It spilled over her bare thigh, soaked the blanket and sent her scooting onto the hot sand.

  “You okay?” Sean asked, appearing beside her.

  She forced a smile. “Just dropped my soda all over myself. It was cold.”

  “You need to go in the water or you’ll be all sticky,” he said.

  “Not me. The ocean’s freezing.”

  By then Kevin had joined them. “No, it’s not, Mom. You’ll love it once you get in.”

  A mischievous grin spread across Sean’s face. “Kev, I don’t think your mom’s going to become a believer unless we prove it to her.”

  She shot a wary look at him and backed up a step. “Meaning what exactly?”

  Before she could react, Sean had scooped her up until she was resting against his bare chest. The sensation of being next to all that sun-warmed skin was so intriguing that for a moment, she completely forgot about his obvious intentions. When she finally remembered, they were already at the ocean’s edge.

  “Put me down, you idiot,” she demanded, trying to wriggle free and escape before he dunked her in the Atlantic. He simply held on more tightly and kept walking.