I open my eyes, looking past the haze of red. Even that is fading with every sip. Control returns to my limbs. On instinct, I bring one hand up and run it through my hair.
Stubble. Short, prickly stubble.
And on that realization, the world crashes into me. I see where I am, what state I’m in, and why.
I’m outside on a… on a balcony. The same one as before? No. I look around. This one’s different. It’s more expansive, for one. For two…
For two, I catch the source of the red. Flames. Dancing flames, from gas torches placed all around the perimeter. I focus on them as the final bits of my dementia drain away.
It’s night. I see the stars above me. The flames make the shadows flicker and twist along the floor.
“Good, good,” Esteban’s voice. “You’ve come back to us now.”
Fear seizes my insides and I jerk up. I expect to be restrained in some way. But I am not. I grip the armrests of my chair and push up—
“Shh, shh, relax,” Esteban says. His hands come on my shoulders, and he gently eases me back. I find myself accepting the movement much too easily.
I tear my eyes away from the flames and look at him. Then I look past him, and see that we are alone on this rooftop.
A rooftop. That’s what it is. Not a balcony. A rooftop!
“Wine?” Esteban asks. “I dare say I am a connoisseur of fine spirits. And I do pride myself on my collection. I’ve brought together rare vintages from all over the world. It’s not the largest, most certainly. But I do try to make it one of the best.”
“Why?” I spit at him. “Do you want to get me drunk so you can rape me, too?” I bring my arms around myself and huddle in my robe, suddenly cold.
“Ah,” Esteban says. He rises and moves away. I watch as he walks to the railing and looks out over his darkened estate. “Lilly. Miss Ryder, if you prefer? Let me assure you that you are in no danger of that from me. Much like with my wines, I have distinguished tastes in bodies. And while I’m sure, you were lovely enough at some point—I saw you when Mr. Stonehart introduced us, after all—people of your gender hold no appeal to me.”
I narrow my eyes at his back. He’s gay?
“And what my men have put you through is unfortunate,” he continues. “But you see, Miss Ryder, certain appetites must be appeased. It is just the seven of us on this island. If I did not offer you to my men, well,” he chuckles, “they would soon get restless. And trust me. This way is the lesser of two evils, for you.”
I scoff to show him what I think, but it’s all a façade. In truth, I don’t think I can channel the strength to withstand abuse at the hands of his guards.
“What do you want?” I ask him softly. It’s almost a plea. “Why am I your prisoner?”
He takes a deep breath. “You smell that?” he asks. “The scent of the sea. Growing up inland, as a little boy, I always dreamed of having a house by the sea.
“It still appeals to me, you know. It still invigorates me. Being here, I’m reminded of all that I’ve lost, of all that was taken away from me—by your Mr. Stonehart.”
He turns around. For the first time since I was kidnapped, Esteban looks calm. Mellow, even. Thoughtful and hypnotic, in a way.
“Hugh—Mr. Blackthorne—assured me that you would be an invaluable bargaining chip for me to claim back what I lost.” He purses his lips. “After all this time, however, I’m beginning to think otherwise.”
Fear seizes my insides.
“Jeremy,” I say quickly. “He knows?”
“Oh, yes,” Esteban nods. “Your Jeremy knows. He knows quite well what we want, who we hold, and what is being done to you. Sadly, he seems quite resolved—unyielding, even—in his position.”
“Good,” I sneer. My proclamation is a complete act. On the inside, I feel hollow and broken. Like there’s nothing left. If Jeremy knows what’s being done to me, and he still doesn’t come…
But, why would he? How could he? The demands I remember being made when they shot the video of me swallowing those poison pills were ludicrous. There’s no way Jeremy would accept.
Except… I had hoped, prayed, wished, that maybe I meant enough to him that he would.
It seems I was wrong.
Despair swells up and all but swallows me whole.
“Good?” Ethan turns back and cocks an eyebrow at me. “Tell me. How is all of this good, Miss Ryder? I was assured that you were an asset valuable enough to be a prime bargaining chip. I was told of Mr. Stonehart’s devotion to you. His obsession for you. I was led to believe he would do anything to get you back.
“Kind of,” he says softly, “how I would do anything to get Dextran back.”
“Let me talk to him then,” I beg. “I can convince him. I’m sure of it! If that’s all you want…”
Esteban looks at me sadly and shakes his head. “That is what I wanted, Miss Ryder. Not anymore.”
“What do you mean?” I whisper.
He sighs, and walks toward me. He deposits his wine glass on the table, and sags into a chair.
I see him from up close. For the first time, I see how very small he seems. How fragile. How broken.
His eyes don’t have that manic glint to them anymore. All I see in them is an overwhelming sadness.
“I don’t want it anymore,” he tells me. “It is something I can never get. All I want now…” He exhales heavily, “…is peace.”
I scoot my chair around a little bit to face him.
“But peace,” he sighs again, “is unattainable, given what I’ve had done to you.”
Is he being penitent? I’m shocked. Is my kidnapper—my second kidnapper—developing a conscience? It’s beyond belief.
I run a hand over my head again just to make sure I’m not hallucinating.
“I’m sorry, Lilly.” He looks at me. “I’ve been led astray. Consumed by greed and vengeance. I manufactured this—this plot—to get my company back. To strike at Mr. Stonehart in a way that he would keenly feel. Assurances were made, but now, it seems, those assurances were false.”
“What did Hugh tell you?” I whisper. I feel my chance, however vague and uncertain, floating somewhere just beyond reach. But just minutes ago, there was no chance that I could speak of.
I reach out, and actually take his hand. “I can help make it right.”
“Can you?” He gives a small, humorless laugh. “I’ve poisoned your mind, Lilly. I’ve damaged you forever. I’ve taken your life, all your potential, away from you. For what? Greed. Avarice.”
He scoffs and pulls his hand away. “Oh, if my family could see me now…”
I swallow.
“There’s no going back for you, Miss Ryder,” he says. “Nor for me. Not ever. We’re both committed. There is no making it right. And unfortunately, in this tale, there is only one end for you.”
He rises. He looks down at me. “I’m sorry,” he says once more. With that, he turns, and walks away.
Chapter Twenty-Seven
LILLY
Mere minutes after Esteban leaves, I am visited by the third member of his guard. The silent one, who’s never said a word to me.
He comes up the stairs smoking a cigarette. I look over my shoulder when I hear him coming. My insides seize in fear.
But my worry was ill-advised. All he does is grunt a crude, “He wants to see you,” just before dropping an envelope on the table. Then he turns and leaves me alone.
He wants to see me? Who wants to see me?
I reach for the sealed, small, square envelope. My heart skips a beat when I see Jeremy’s tight, precise writing on the front.
To Lilly.
Excitement rips through me as I tear it open. I look around making sure I’m alone. Then I withdraw the paper.
I unfold it. My breath catches when I see lines and lines of small, tightly bound text. Without even reading, I know right away: Jeremy wrote this.
He wrote this, whatever it is, for me. When? I scan the page but there’s no date.
>
Doubt forms in the back of my mind: What if I’m imagining this? Then my hand crawls up to the top of my head. I wince when my fingers find that awful, prickly skin.
It means this is real! I hold the letter up so it’s better illuminated by the flames and begin to read:
Lilly.
I cannot say all the things I want to in this letter. You know why. My words will not be restricted to your eyes alone. Others will see.
So, I will say what I must, and leave it at that.
I have to see you. I have to know that you are alive. Believe me when I say that I am willing to do whatever it takes to get you back.
But I have to be sure. I have to be sure that you are you. I have to make sure that your safety is guaranteed.
I failed you. And now, I am paying for my mistake.
I will make it right. That, I swear. On my mother’s grave, I promise you. I will do whatever it takes to get you back. You know I hate repetition. But that one promise is worth repeating, over and over again:
I am willing to do anything to get you back.
So to whoever else may read this message, know that my word is sealed in writing. I am committed. You will return to me, my sweet Lilly-Flower.
I have initiated the transfer of Stonehart Industries stock. The pieces are in place. All that remains is final confirmation. Affirmation, that I still have you.
And so I request a meeting. On the night of July 10th, you and I will meet. I will see that you are safe, that you are secure. And it is only after that is guaranteed that the demands made of me shall be met.
I failed you once, Lilly. I did not protect you as I should. But I love you. My love for you trumps all else. Let me be ruined. I will willingly sign my empire away if it means I can have you back.
July 10th, Lilly. On that day, you are coming home.
My hands shake as I put the letter down. I can’t believe what I’ve read. Could it be true? Would Jeremy truly give up all he has for me?
I can’t ask him to do that. And I have the overwhelming fear that he and I will both be stepping into a horrible trap.
July 10th. July 10th. How long ago was this letter written? How much time do I have left?
What day is it today?
“Today is the dawn of the ninth.” A voice informs me. “That means we have approximately a day and a half to get you to the designated meeting place.”
I spin around, clamping a hand over my mouth. I hadn’t realized I’d spoken!
Big Man comes into view, along with Hugh. “Lilly,” Hugh continues, “you’ll be meeting my son tomorrow night.” He extends a black cloth sack to me. “Over your head. Quickly now. We have to rush to make sure we get there in time, before your… visions… take hold of you again.”
The last thing I see, before the cloth covers my face, is Hugh’s triumphant and sinister grin.
--
My hands are tied behind me and I’m directed, none too kindly, down an unfamiliar path. There’s a stuttering roar in the distance. I recognize the blades of a helicopter.
The sound becomes deafening as we approach. Someone—Big Man, probably—lifts me up and deposits me on the metal floor of the cabin.
“Eighteen hours you have to get her back!” Somebody screams. Esteban? Maybe. It’s hard to tell with the bag over my head and the roar of the rotors.
The door slides shut, isolating us from the noise. I go to my knees, trying to right myself. Something hard strikes me in the back of the head.
Pain explodes through my skull. I pass out.
--
“Welcome to… paradise!”
The bag is ripped from my head. I gasp, wide awake, alert, and panicking.
I’m strapped tightly to a chair. I cannot move. My head whips around as I try to take in as much of my surroundings as I can.
I’m in a vast, empty warehouse. It’s cold. Flood lights from the ceiling illuminate the place. Their harsh whiteness reflects off the shining, grey floor.
“What—” I try to mumble, only to realize that I can’t. There’s some type of gag in my mouth.
Esteban is right there beside me. That glimmer of madness is back in his eyes.
Is this real? I wonder. I want to touch my scalp.
But then I remember that, not once, did I question reality when lost in the illusions. That knowledge steadies me. This is real.
“Well, well, well, Miss Ryder,” Esteban laughs. “How do you like your new accommodations?”
I make a futile attempt to speak that amounts to nothing.
“Your sweet Jeremy picked them out for us,” he says.
My eyes widen. Jeremy’s here! He’s nearby, I can feel it!
I redouble my efforts to speak.
“Quiet,” Esteban snaps. “You have to be told how this will all work. You do want to see him. Don’t you?”
Immediately, I stop struggling and go still.
“Thought so,” Esteban smiles. “So, Miss Ryder, here are our rules of engagement:
“You will be given ten minutes together. How you spend that time is up to you. Physical contact, however, is prohibited. To guarantee your compliance, and to nullify any chance of escape, I’ve been given… this.”
Esteban kneels down, and pulls from his briefcase, a thin, black, plastic collar.
I suck in a panicked breath. My heartbeat doubles. My chest rises and falls in short, tense gasps.
“Ah, yes,” Esteban smiles again. “You recognize it. You know, I noticed one much like it around your neck when I visited Jeremy’s home.” He steps to me. I shy away.
“Hush, hush! Don’t worry,” he tells me, stroking my cheek with the back of his hand. “It’ll all be over soon. If Mr. Stonehart complies. You had better hope he does, because, if not…” He snaps the collar around my neck in a sudden jab. “…well, all it takes is one press of a button and you’re pretty much a goner. Aren’t you?”
I force myself to sit tall and stare him straight in the eyes. I will not have him see me afraid.
“And there it is again,” he murmurs. “That ill-advised façade of strength. Rose informed me that you like to feign appearances.
“Such a filthy thing, this collar,” he says, shaking his head. “And to think, you want to return to the man who first fitted it on you! My dear, if anything, you should have viewed my kidnapping as an escape. But,” he shrugs. “That’s just the way the cookie crumbles. That’s the right saying. Isn’t it? Forgive me. English is not my mother tongue.”
I glare at him, silent and full of hatred.
“So,” he continues, “you understand how it is vital that you cooperate. Yes? The current of your collar has been, hmm, what’s the right word… adjusted?” He snickers. Then he leans forward, pressing his fists into my thighs. “It’s been doubled, Lilly,” he tells me. Then he shakes his head. “Not even one as determined as you can live through a shock powerful as that.”
My eyes widen in horror.
“Mr. Stonehart has been informed of the new threat to your well-being,” Esteban says. “If he wants you back, in truth, he will have you before the night is done. And, if not…?” He lifts his shoulders in a nonchalant shrug. “Then it’s lights out for poor Miss Ryder. In either case,” He smiles. “You and I will not be seeing each other again. This is it, our final good-bye. I hope that, for your sake, Mr. Stonehart comes to the right decision today.”
Chapter Twenty-Eight
LILLY
After Esteban leaves, a long stretch of time passes where the only thing I hear is my own frantic breathing.
I am lucid. I know it. I can feel the cold air against my shaved scalp. Goosebumps prickle my skin.
I try to calm my breathing. I cannot. Every inhale is borderline frantic. The exhales are no better. Every time I breathe, I’m reminded of the tightness around my throat, of the constricting, deceiving thin strip of plastic that has been the source of so much pain, so much uncertainty, since the first moment I woke with it on almost a year ago.
Almost a year but not exactly. It’s been ten months. And now things have gone full circle. I’m in a warehouse in God-knows-what location. I have the collar back around my neck. The current’s been doubled. The control of it is, once more, in the hands of a madman.
A madman who has already admitted he’d be willing to kill me. A madman spurred past the brink of sanity by the person who first fitted the collar on me.
Jesus.
A sound comes from behind me. I whip my head around, instantly alert. Could that be Jeremy?
But when I look, there’s no one there. Just the long, vast, empty expanse of warehouse space.
Did I imagine the noise?
Dread fills me. Every passing minute where nothing happens makes me more anxious. Where is Jeremy? He’s supposed to be here. Esteban said he’s here. Why isn’t he here, Goddammit?
I start thrashing against the bonds. “Let me out! Let me out!” I try to scream. But the gag in my mouth muffles all speech. A sweat breaks out over my back. I feel hot and freezing cold at the same time. It’s like I’m in the throes of a horrible fever combined with the worst elements of a nightmare.
A cramp shoots through my left arm. I stop, panic ripping through me. For a dreadful moment I think the current has been turned on.
But, no. That was just my imagination. My imagination, or another latent effect of the poison that’s been given to me?
I start to tremble. To shake. I can’t help it. It comes from the depths of my body, from the very core. I cannot fight it. How can I fight? How can I do anything, restricted as I am, stuck as I am, in my current position?
Dread continues to fill me. It flows into me like sewage pumped out of a septic tank. I thought I was strong. I thought I could resist. But there’s nothing left. Not anymore. I’ve been broken. I’ve been overcome.
Where is Jeremy, Goddammit?
Could Esteban have lied? Could this be another one of his games? His, Hugh’s, or Rose’s twisted, fucked up, sadistic games? I’m the victim of so many wrongdoings. How is it possible to stay strong when all the lights of my life have been snuffed out?
Uncovering You: The Complete Series (Mega Box Set) Page 106