“Oh, for the love of…” I stride toward her. She braces herself, the tiny old lady, as if readying for a physical attack.
But her steely expression turns to one of surprise when I bustle right past her, ignoring her completely, and take the fire exit stairs down.
32.
It’s dark and it’s cold on the street, and I hate being outside at night. I can’t go home. Where do I turn?
I consider the library. It’s open 24/7 for everyone studying. But it’s all the way on the other side of campus. I wouldn’t feel safe making the trek out there now.
There is one other option.
James.
I take out my phone and scroll to his name. Really, right now, what choice do I have?
I hit call.
He picks up on the second ring. “Hello, Celeste.”
“I need your help,” I say.
“Really.”
“Yes. You have to pick me up.”
“Do I? After the stunt you pulled running out on me, again?”
“Look, James, I’ve had a really long day, and trust me, I wouldn’t be calling you if I had any alternative. But I don’t. So here I am, completely at your mercy. So shoot me for asking for help.”
“You don’t sound particularly distressed.”
“That’s because I’m fucking pissed off, James! Look…” I take a deep breath. “I’m asking you for one favor. This one time. My roommate locked me out, and I have nowhere to go. I’m standing in front of my building freezing my ass off. The damn entrance light is flickering. It’s going to go out at any moment. Are you going to help me, or not?”
“What exactly are you asking me, Celeste?” He’s toying with me, the asshole. “What would you like me to do? Should I call Summer, perhaps, and try to smooth things out?”
“I’m asking you to pick me the fuck up!” I explode. I pause, close my eyes, and rub the bridge of my nose. “I’m sorry. It’s just—I’m really fucking angry! You know? And I wouldn’t be calling you now if I wasn’t desperate. Are you going to help me, James, or are you going to leave me out here on my own? Do you want me to beg? Because honestly, after the day I’ve had? I’m willing to do anything just to get it over with.”
“Celeste, relax.” His voice is calm and certain. “I grabbed my car keys as soon as I figured out what you needed. I’ll be there soon.”
***
James’ sleek, black Porsche pulls up to the curb. I walk around the front and get in.
“I had a feeling you would call,” he says when I close the door.
I strap the seatbelt on. “Why? I’m not your two a.m. booty call.”
“Not that,” he says. He steers into traffic with none of the aggression of last time. “I handled your question poorly, earlier today. You asked what Summer wanted. I played coy and let you assume.” He looks over at me. “I’m sorry.”
“So?” I ask. “What did she want?”
“She came and demanded to know if I had slept with you.”
The blood drains from my face. “Oh,” I say weakly.
“I told her yes.”
I sink deeper into the seat.
He notices. “Should I have lied?” he asks.
“It’s complicated,” I mutter.
So that’s why Summer looked so triumphant leaving his office. She got what she wanted.
And what she wanted was confirmation of my infidelity. Not a quick random fuck from Professor Landon.
Even worse, she got it straight from the horse’s mouth. If I had fessed up, at least I would have had the chance to smooth things over. Now I doubt I’ll ever be given the opportunity.
I groan.
“That bad?” James comments.
I shake my head. “Never mind… Let’s just get to your place. I’m tired. I need to sleep.”
“K,” he says.
We drive the rest of the way in silence.
33.
“I never got to thank you last night,” I tell James early the next morning.
He’s making himself an unhurried breakfast of eggs and toast in a pristine white Harvard robe. The little emblem on his chest is a subtle confirmation of his alma mater.
He glances at me. “What for? From what I surmise, I made your situation worse, not better.” The kettle boils. He hooks his thumb to it. “Would you get that?”
“Oh. Sure.” I take it off the stand, then pour water into a cup pre-filled with instant coffee.
James puts his eggs on a plate and pops the toast out early. “Thanks, babe,” he says, taking the cup from me and sitting down.
I notice he did not once ask if I were hungry or wanted to eat. He just set about making his breakfast for one.
“Anyway, thanks. For picking me up. For letting me spend the night.” I gesture back at the couch where I slept while he stayed upstairs. “For letting me use your shower this morning.”
“It’s nothing,” he says. “You see for yourself. I’ve got plenty of space.”
He chews his egg.
I shift from foot to foot, feeling a little awkward. James hasn’t tried to make a move on me yet. Even though we were never close, per se, I always felt like our bodies, at least, were in perfect sync.
Now the harmony is gone. James seems withdrawn, somehow.
That’s not him. That’s not who he is. Not who I know him as. The James I see now feels like a bad replica. Like he’s putting on a show for his in-laws or something.
I don’t like it.
“Anyway, I’ll get out of your hair as soon as I can,” I promise. “I’ve just got to figure out what to do with Summer first. I’ll go back to the apartment today and see if I can get through the block, and then—“
“Celeste.” James cuts me off. “You’re avoiding.”
“What? What am I avoiding?”
“You’re avoiding telling me the truth,” he says calmly. He cuts into his eggs, keeping his eyes on the sawing motion of his knife. He cuts out a small piece and plops it in his mouth. “You still haven’t told me why you ended up in the hospital, or what the doctors told you.” He looks at me, then, and holds my gaze. “Don’t think I haven’t noticed.”
I feel a sudden heaviness settle over my shoulders.
I try to laugh it off. “Oh, that? That was nothing. I told you…”
“No, you didn’t,” he interrupts. “You lied. Everything I gather points to you being out of a home for the foreseeable future.” He says it as casually as if he’s just commenting on the weather. “I like you, Celeste, but there are going to be rules. I need honesty between us. You’re free to spend however long you want on the couch, of course, as a friend.” He glances past me at the furniture. “But I would much rather you stay with me, in my bed, as my lover.”
He pushes his plate of food away, quite delicately, and dabs at his lips with a napkin. “The choice is yours. You know where I stand.” His eyes hone in on me, and his voice takes a tone of unadulterated passion. “You know how much I want to make you come.”
And just like that, I dissolve into a puddle of pure need. I have to clutch the back of a stool to stay upright.
“That’s all up to you, of course.” He rises and turns away. “I’m going to go shower. The door’s open and the invitation’s at your feet. What you do with it?” He shrugs. “That’s up to you.”
And he leaves me there, gawking after him.
I feel his pull.
***
I pace the living room floor, caught by indecision, tempted by his offer, but knowing I could never satisfy his conditions.
He wants to know what happened at the hospital.
Does that mean he cares?
He shouldn’t. But even if he does, I’m not telling him. Cancer, all that shit, all of it, I’m keeping a secret as long as I can.
Even if that secret takes me to the grave.
I glance at the clock. It’s way too late to try and make my first class. Summer will undoubtedly be there.
I’d hate for her t
o think my absence is me avoiding her.
I’m still trying to make up my mind on what to do when I hear the water shut off. I hear a noise and look up.
A completely naked James save for a towel wrapped around his waist is standing at the top of the stairs.
Surprise flickers across his face. His eyebrows go up. “You didn’t join me,” he says.
I bunch my hands into fists at the sides of my body. God, how I want to run those hands all over his tight muscles.
“No,” I say, my voice strained.
“And yet you didn’t leave.” He leans forward into the railing, holding himself up with his arms. His chest and shoulders tightens deliciously as he lowers his upper body over the edge. “Why is that?”
“Do you want me gone?” I ask, trying the offensive to cover up my sudden vulnerability for him.
“Certainly not,” he smiles. That smile, coupled with his velvety smooth voice, does crazy things to my insides. He starts down the stairs. “I just thought,” he says, trailing one hand along the railing, “that your presence here, instead of whatever class you’re supposed to have at the moment, would be dictated by…” he stops at the bottom of the stairs, so that we’re finally on the same level, “…our fucking.”
And just like that, my inhibitions are vanished. I’m putty in his hands.
He approaches me, each step pure and predatory. I stare at him, paralyzed by physical masculine perfection.
“Celeste.” He steps around me, brushing my hair back to expose my ear with one finger. “I want to fuck you.” He grabs my hips and pulls them tight to him. I gasp when I feel the erection hidden by his towel. “Do you want to let me fuck you?”
“God, yes,” I whisper. My knees are weak.
He brings his hand around to my other ear. “Do you want me to fuck you… hard?” he rustles.
“Yes!” I breathe.
He spins me around. His mouth lands on mine.
He kisses me with a fiery passion. My brain short-circuits with his lips on mine. Higher-level thought becomes impossible. All I know is that I need more, more, more!
“Tell me how you need me,” he rasps into my neck. He pushes his hips into me and rubs his cock over the smooth, soft flesh of my stomach. “Tell me how bad you want it.”
“I want you,” I gasp. His hands pull open my shirt and my breasts spill out. He unhooks the bra and lets it fall to the wayside. “I need you to fuck me hard.” His mouth drops to one breast, then shifts to the other. “Make me forget everything else,” I beg. He drops to his knees and presses his face into my tummy, showering me with hot, hungry kisses. His hands hold onto me so tight. “Make me forget who I am.” He tears apart my jeans, and he shimmies them down my legs. He runs those strong fingers up and down the back of my thigh, cupping my ass and squeezing. “Make me forget my name,” I say, as his fingers dip into my panties and peel them off. “Make me forget everyone, everything, except you!”
He complies with a growl and buries his face in my pussy. I moan as his tongue starts to lap at me. The way he does it is unlike anything I’ve ever experienced before. He eats me out as if my pussy were the last he’ll ever touch.
In a surprised moment of shock, I realize I wouldn’t be all that opposed to that proposition.
No, no, no, I scold myself. Getting possessive over him is the last thing I want. It’s the first step toward developing feelings, and feelings are most definitely out.
He stops. The sudden removal of his tongue blasts a cold chill thru me.
My eyes shoot open, and I look down. James is staring back at me, a hard look on his face.
“You withdrew.” His jaw is set and he looks angry. “I told you not to do that.”
“James, please,” I beg, needing him to continue, needing him to dispel the pooling lust between my legs. “Don’t stop.”
My hands tangle in his hair, and I pull him to me. He doesn’t budge.
“You withdrew,” he repeats. “And I don’t like that. I’m going to have to teach you a lesson, Celeste.” He stands and looms tall over me, frightening in his intensity. “Strip,” he commands.
“I’m already naked—“
“Your shoes,” he says. “Bend at the waist and take them off. Right now.”
The command in his voice is nothing I can deny. Immediately, I drop down. He stops me.
“Keep your legs straight,” he says. “Bend forward on your way down. Take them off, and stay like that. Show me your fucking ass.”
I look in his eyes for an uncertain moment. He does not waver. “Do it, Celeste,” he whispers. “Do it now.”
I swallow, perturbed and yet miraculously turned on by his sudden shift in attitude. I bend down, at the waist, keeping my legs straight, just as he commanded.
I undo the strap and slip out of one shoe, then the next.
I start to rise, but his hand on my lower back stops me. “Tut-tut,” he says. “Not yet. Stay bent over, Celeste.”
I turn my head to look at him.
“Eyes down!” he snaps, and punctuates it by slapping my bare ass. I nearly fall forward from the impact and flinch at the sharp bit of pain brought by his hand.
But then sheer lust washes over that pain, and the desire to comply with his every wish comes over me. I’ll do anything he says so long as he gets me off.
“Good girl,” he murmurs. He steps around me, running one hand over my skin. “Spread your legs. Stand wider.”
I do as he says, still keeping my head down. I see his feet from between my legs.
He drops his towel. It hits the floor in a pile. “Hold your ankles,” he says. I do. “Good. That’s it. God, you look so fucking perfect like that. Your pussy is dripping wet. You want me bad, don’t you?”
“Yes!” I plead
“I want you too,” he says. His voice is growing husky. It has a particular edge I’ve never heard before. A hint of aggression, of anger. Of underlying displeasure. “But I can’t have you retreating on me.” He smacks my ass. I yelp out. “That’s not how things work, Celeste.”
He grips each ass cheek tight in his hands and jiggles them. He positions himself right at my entrance, so close that I can feel the heat emanating from his body, but not yet close enough to touch.
“God, you’re so fucking beautiful. So sexy. So pure.” He reaches down and scrapes his nails along my thigh from my knee to the curve of my butt. I wince against the pleasured pain. I’m going to have red marks running down both legs. “I’m going to ruin you, Celeste, you know that. I’m going to make it so that no man you ever have after will be the equal of me. You’re going to be mine.” Another slap. “My woman, my lover, my Celeste.”
This is getting intense. But I love it. Hearing him speak with such passion fills me with a feeling entirely unknown before.
This is more than just desire. I’ve been desired before, felt it many times with other men—but what I’ve never felt was valued.
James gives me that. He makes me special. Like I’m one of a kind.
It’s all a lie, of course. I can’t get seduced by the fantasy that I might actually mean something to him.
But it sure is nice to pretend.
“And what do you want your Celeste to do?” I purr.
He makes a sound of pleasure deep in his throat. “Get up,” he says. “Get on the counter. I’m going to fuck you in the kitchen.”
I straighten as fast as I can. Too fast. I feel a bit of light-headedness. I blink through it, fighting the vertigo, determined not to have a repeat of hospital night…
The wave passes. I look at James, see the raw desire burning in his eyes, see the prominence of his thick, pulsing cock. A wave of different sorts washes through me. This is a rush of anticipated pleasure.
He watches me closely. He noticed my stumble, I’m sure of it. But he doesn’t comment. Instead, he says, “Go.”
I strut to the counter, feeling his eyes glued to my ass. I hop on, twist around, lean back and spread my legs. “Come get me, Profess
or Landon.”
James rushes to me. Our mouths crash in a fiery kiss. His torso presses against mine. I love the hardness of his body, love the way my breasts are squeezed tight. I love the firmness of his touch, the heat of his skin, the way when he’s with me, I forget all else.
His hands move between us, and he twists my nipples. Then he pinches them. Hard.
I gasp out. He breaks away from the kiss and sucks on the hurt. I moan with his mouth on my breasts. God, it feels good to have them touched. They’re so tender, so needy…
He kisses his way lower, lower, lower. He stops with his mouth just inches away from my pussy.
He looks up at me. “Do I have your word you won’t retreat?
“Yes!” I cry pressing my legs to him.
“Do I have your word you won’t hold back?”
“God no!” I say.
He gives a tiny, devilish grin. “You better not. When I make you come, I want your whole body to shake. I want you to scream. I want you to give in to the pleasure fully. I want the whole goddamned building to know you’re being fucked, Celeste.” He tightens his grip on my hips and stares me straight in the eyes. “Will you do that for me?”
“Yes!” I say. “A million times, yes. Yes, yes, yes! Just hurry and fuck me!”
“At your command,” he snarls. I yelp as he flips me over in one quick jerk. My breasts and stomach hit the cold granite counter. I gasp as the breath is stolen from me.
“You know I’m clean,” he says. I can feel his tip hovering at my entrance. “Do you trust me yet?”
“Yes,” I say, my logical mind absolutely devoured by the powerful need pulsing through me.
Uncovering You: The Complete Series (Mega Box Set) Page 135