“It was her wish to keep it secret. There has been too much turmoil in the ranks since Jonrell’s death and she didn’t want to add any more stress.”
“One Above, you at least have to tell Kaz.”
Hag’s eyes shot open. Krytien thought she had fallen asleep. “No! Not that. Most of all do not tell him.”
“As commander he has the right to know,” said Krytien.
She tried to sit up, but a coughing fit took her back down to the cot. She collected herself quicker this time. “Because he is commander, that’s why he shouldn’t know,” she finally managed. “He’s got too much troubling him already. I know you can see it. The last thing the big softie needs is to worry about me too. Please Krytien, don’t say anything to him until this is done.”
The honest plea took Krytien by surprise. Hag rarely ever let her guard down, but the mage saw that the last thing she truly wanted was to burden anyone.
Krytien slowly nodded. “I understand. It’s for you to tell.”
“Thank you.”
“Just make sure you stay alive long enough to do it. It’s the least you owe him and everyone else for that matter.”
“Then drop all this mushy stuff and let me get some rest.”
Krytien smiled. “I can do that.”
He exchanged a look with Wiqua and left the tent, wiping his eyes.
* * *
Kaz looked up as Elyse entered his tent.
“Working late again, I see,” she said.
Kaz grunted. “Of course. We’ll end up converging with Jeldor sometime in the next two days. Based on reports, we’re likely to face off against Conroy and Markus by the end of the week.”
Elyse walked over to him and rested a hand on his shoulder. Her touch caused him to flinch, but she did not remove it.
“I hope you know just how much your effort means to me. I nearly gave up after Jonrell’s death. Without you, this war would already be lost.”
Kaz turned away from her intense gaze. His guilt over Grin’s death weighed on him too greatly. “I wanted to talk to you about something,” he said.
Elyse grabbed his arm and pulled for Kaz to turn back and face her. “I wasn’t finished,” she said.
Kaz found he couldn’t speak as he stared into her emerald eyes.
“Not only would the war be lost but so would my kingdom. Most importantly, I would be lost. You have been the rock in my life. It is because of you that I’m stronger. You’ve given me everything.” She paused. “I know the mysteries of your past bother you more than you let on. I just wanted to tell you that I don’t care about your past, I care only about the man you are now. You are a great man and someone I am proud to know.”
Elyse’s words bit deep into his flesh as he thought about his conversation with Kroke. He knew the right thing to do would be to tell Elyse the truth. Yet, he found himself conflicted after hearing her open up to him.
“The decision is yours,” Kroke had told him earlier. He doesn’t care, so why should I? What’s one secret? No. I can’t do that.
He opened his mouth to tell Elyse the truth, when she did something he would not have expected in ten lifetimes.
She wrapped her arms around his neck, pulled him close, and kissed him. He forgot his guilt as her soft lips pressed into his and his arms found their way around her waist. They held each other tightly and Kaz did not want the moment to end. Yet, his past haunted him.
As he kissed Elyse, a vision entered his mind of a beautiful woman with soft skin, the color of polished onyx. In the vision, he caressed her cheek and stared into her deep brown eyes.
“I love you, Kaz.”
He started to respond in turn, except he blinked. And when he did, he saw that it was Elyse who had spoken those words. He had caressed her cheek.
Who . . . who was that?
Intense emotions for the woman in his vision coursed through his mind as he pulled away from Elyse.
She was someone I loved.
“Is everything alright?” Elyse asked. She looked alarmed.
Kaz looked up, realizing he had dropped to his knees. Elyse wore a look of confusion.
“I’m sorry,” she continued, her expression turning to one of hurt. “I shouldn’t have overstepped myself.”
Kaz opened his mouth, trying to find the words to explain what happened, but the more Kaz fought, the more impossible it became to do so. Slowly, the image of the woman faded.
“Kaz, please. Speak to me. Are you alright? What happened?” Elyse asked.
She knelt down in front of him.
“I don’t know,” he whispered.
Chapter 37
“They would be an impressive host if we didn’t outnumber them two to one,” said Markus, shielding his eyes from the blistering sun.
Conroy’s mount shuffled restlessly in place. His squinted eyes never left the enemy’s lines when he answered. “Numbers don’t mean everything.”
“As Kaz has shown before.”
“We will win,” said Conroy, sweat beading on his brow. “But it will not be easy. Kaz’s men have become hardened veterans. Just look at their lines. Those are well-disciplined soldiers. He’s done wonders when you consider the state of the queen’s army before this began. Even though we have every advantage, I expect this to still be a hard fought battle.”
Markus grunted and Conroy almost chuckled to himself. Olasi’s son liked to think himself a man capable of ruling as well as his father had, but Conroy knew he was but a shadow of the former duke.
Even in old age, Olasi’s mind was sharp. He would have looked over our enemy and offered some sort of insight rather than restating the obvious. He wouldn’t have let Elyse slip through his fingers and he would have done a much better job of delaying Jeldor from meeting back up with Kaz. Granted, the old man would never have bent a knee to me either. I guess you take the bad with the good.
“My lord,” said Ventrin, pointing. “It looks as though they accepted your offer to parlay.”
Conroy did his best to conceal his excitement as he watched three figures separate themselves from the ranks. He had hoped the foreign commander would be willing to meet before battle if only so he could see Kaz in person. Conroy wanted to hate the man for making his path to the throne more difficult than it needed to be, but he could not.
“Let’s go,” said Conroy, clicking the reins of his mount. Markus and Ventrin fell in behind him.
Conroy had forced Kaz to meet him on a field of his choosing. Long ago after King Aurnon the Eighth’s death, Conroy had planned for this day, knowing that this location would be the most ideal for him to achieve victory. Every lie whispered, gold piece spent, and decision made since the king’s death had led to this battle.
Other than a few low hills spread haphazardly over the land, the terrain was mostly flat before them. Tall grass and small patches of trees lined the sides of the open space.
Conroy slowed his mount as he neared the three men. Duke Jeldor and General Grayer accompanied Kaz. He would have considered them more, but Conroy found himself captivated by the foreigner. He closed his jaw, realizing that his mouth had started to gape. The reports had been true after all. Kaz wore a suit of armor reminiscent of what the great General Victas had worn.
How is that possible? He would not have access to such texts. And who among his ranks possibly has the skill to craft such a thing.
Only after composing himself over the shock of the elaborate armor did he realize that Elyse had not joined the party.
Interesting.
Their groups came to a halt some ten feet from each other. Neither said a word. Conroy watched Jeldor and Grayer eye their commander.
One Above, I didn’t think anyone could make Jeldor hold his tongue.
Kaz carried himself in a way that demanded respect. He sat rigid in his saddle, holding the famed panther helm under one arm. The sun shone bright off the black man’s shaved head, a thick goatee and furrowed brow added to his intense demeanor.
Conroy felt a slight twist in his gut. Never had any man’s gaze intimidated him, yet something in Kaz’s stare unnerved him. He caught himself.
He is but one man.
“Where is your fair queen? Did she not have the nerve to meet me face-to-face?”
“She did not want to give you the wrong impression,” said Kaz.
“And what impression is that?”
“That she would accept any of your terms.”
“I’m not surprised. Her rule has been plagued by foolish decisions.”
“If you suspected her response, then why call this parlay at all?” asked Jeldor.
Conroy ignored Jeldor and spoke to Kaz instead. “You know Commander, I’ve been impressed with your ability. I hoped that if we had a chance to speak in person, I might convince you to leave Elyse and join me. Together we could not only secure Cadonia, but tame Thurum once again and unite the kingdom as it had once been under Aurnon the First.”
“What are you talking about?” said Markus in a hushed whisper.
Conroy glared at the man, refusing to elaborate further.
“I will not turn traitor,” said Kaz.
“Traitor,” repeated Conroy, the word sour on his tongue. “I’m sure you’ve heard of General Victas, later Emperor Victas of the Quoron Empire. After all, you wear armor almost identical to his. Many thought he was a traitor at first when he seized the throne, yet most historians agree that without him the empire would not have survived as long as it had.” He paused. “Like Victas, I know that it is my duty to Cadonia to take the throne from Elyse. Call me a traitor now or perhaps a villain, but in time, history will prove that my actions saved Cadonia.”
“And I thought Bronn was arrogant,” said Jeldor under his breath.
Conroy glared at the duke, but did not allow his emotions to get the better of him. He gave Kaz one last chance. “You have proven yourself a worthy commander and I’ll admit your armor is quite the sight to behold, but you are not Victas. You will not win today.”
Kaz grunted. “You’re right. I am not Victas. I know a little about the man. Unlike you, I don’t idolize the ghosts of the past.”
“The man was the greatest general to walk the face of this earth, undefeated in his lifetime,” said Conroy, terser than he intended.
Kaz’s stare intensified and his voice took on an edge that Conroy felt crawl up his skin. “Victas may have been undefeated in his lifetime, but that is only because he did not live long enough to face me in battle.”
* * *
Elyse paced the hospital tent, waiting for it all to begin. She had decided not to meet Conroy. She knew that it may come across as a sign of weakness to the duke, but her real purpose was to show that she only wore one face today.
Not the young princess. Not the unprepared queen. Not the stubborn woman. Let Conroy see Kaz up close to know the kind of man who commands my army. Let him understand better than before that I will not be pushed again.
In the meantime while the parlay took place, Elyse felt the need to stay busy. So, she helped Wiqua with any last minute preparations he needed in the infirmary. The beds were empty now, but Elyse knew it wouldn’t be long before each would be filled with the moans of the wounded and dying.
One Above, let this be the last time. Win or lose, please no more death.
“Thank you again for your help, Your Majesty,” said Wiqua, bowing.
Elyse smiled back at the Byzernian as she finished organizing fresh linen. “It’s nothing. I just want to do my part.”
“It’s a rare thing for someone of your station to even be seen talking to us, let alone pitch in and do some real work, you know,” said Hag. She sat down as she talked in order to catch her breath. “Your brother surprised us all in much the same way. He’d be glad to see you here.”
“Thank you. I try to learn from the best,” said Elyse. “Unfortunately, I can’t stay much longer. I do need to witness the battle.”
“Of course,” said Wiqua. “Please, go on now. I believe we’re as ready as we can expect to be.”
Elyse understood the solemn tone of the man’s voice. She parted after giving him a warm hug and then walked over and did the same with Hag. The two could not be more different and yet Elyse saw the genuine love they shared. Their relationship had encouraged her to express her feelings for Kaz.
She left the tent with guards and Lobella at her side. Kaz’s reaction to her advances and their kiss confused her at best. At first, he seemed to reciprocate and his warm embrace filled the gaping hole in her heart. But then, he had tensed and pulled away, wearing a look of distress before sinking to the ground.
Elyse had tried to learn what had happened, but all Kaz would say is that certain memories came back to him. He would not elaborate. And since then, Kaz grew increasingly distant.
Their conversations since had been about general strategy and reviewing information Elyse obtained from Bronn in regards to Conroy’s tendencies as a person and leader.
Perhaps he has too much on his mind and will not allow himself to open up until the battle is over.
She said a silent prayer as she walked, praying to ease the stresses of Kaz’s mind as well as the worries of her own.
* * *
The three men headed back to camp and Kaz eyed the formation of his soldiers.
“That went better than I thought it would,” said General Grayer.
“His offer to you took me off guard,” said Jeldor, looking at Kaz. “Conroy isn’t known to hand out compliments. You’ve earned his respect and apparently his admiration.”
Kaz shrugged. “I could care less what he thinks of me. His meeting was a mistake on his part.”
“How so?” asked Grayer.
“He’s more enamored with Victas than what Elyse learned from Bronn.”
“He certainly wasn’t happy about how you diminished the greatness of Victas,” said Jeldor.
Kaz smiled. “Of course he wasn’t. And because he strikes me as the kind of man who’s unaccustomed to being challenged, I’m willing to bet his emotions will influence his decision-making and battle strategy.”
“So, how will that affect our plans?” asked Jeldor.
“It won’t,” said Kaz. “You will still take the right, and Grayer the left. I will command the center. We’ve already positioned ourselves to look like we might be susceptible to a wedge attack. I was worried he might have seen through our deception and change formation, but now, I think he’ll use that strategy no matter what.”
“What makes you so confident he won’t change?” asked Jeldor.
Kaz saw Grayer grinning. “Tell him.”
“Kaz had Drake look up tendencies in Victas’s strategies. It took him awhile to cross-reference all the accounts, but apparently in a situation similar to ours, Victas always preferred a wedge formation. He practically invented the strategy,” said Grayer.
Jeldor chuckled. “Conroy would know that too. And since you downplayed your knowledge of Victas, he’ll be bent on proving to you the man’s genius.”
Kaz nodded. “Let’s just hope I haven’t out-thought myself.”
“I doubt it,” said Jeldor. “I haven’t agreed with everything you’ve done, but I’m not ashamed to say that I can’t imagine we’d have been as successful without you.”
The three stopped fifty yards from the first line of soldiers. They said their farewells and wished each other luck. Kaz had a great deal of respect for both men. He hoped this wouldn’t be the last time he’d see them.
Jeldor rode left while Grayer peeled away toward the light infantry on the right. Kaz dismounted, handing the reins to an aide and walked toward the front lines of his men. Krytien awaited him.
“How’d it go?” asked the mage.
“About how I expected,” said Kaz.
“Any changes?”
“Nothing for now. Any adjustments will have to happen once we’re engaged.”
“So, you still want me out here then?” asked Krytien.
&nb
sp; Kaz heard the nervousness in the mage’s voice. He put his hand on his shoulder. “I need you here. You’re the only one I trust to get word to Drake and Janik. Besides, you and the other two are crucial for keeping the center from falling apart. We can’t give away ground too quickly which means we’ll need to suffer a lot of abuse until the wings fold around Conroy.”
Krytien sighed. “Let’s get this over with then.”
“Good. Take your place in the third line, directly behind me. As long as you don’t stray, I promise no one will get to you.”
Krytien met his eyes and nodded before easing into the ranks. He took a place next to Nora and Lufflin.
Crusher came up beside Kaz. “They’re ready. Did you want to say some words to them?”
Kaz shook his head. “They know who they are. They know what this means. If they don’t, then I’ve failed them as a commander.”
Crusher grunted. “Are you ready?”
Kaz thought about that for a moment. He still hadn’t admitted the truth to either Crusher or Elyse. The weight of the image he still held in his mind of the black-skinned woman had distracted him too much.
Besides, now is not the time for such a discussion.
He wondered what kind of a man he was to hide the truth. He picked up his helm and secured it over his head. Looking out through the panther’s mouth toward Conroy’s lines, his heart raced and his hands twitched. Whether in the glimpses of his distant past, or the newly formed experiences of his time in Cadonia, he had always been ready to fight.
It may be the only thing I truly know.
“Absolutely,” said Kaz finally to the Ghal.
Crusher slapped him on the back and grinned. “So am I.”
The two fell into ranks and watched as Conroy’s troops came forward in a tight wedge, just as Kaz had predicted. The weight of the world trickled off his shoulders and he grinned.
I may have been born for this.
* * *
“Are you sure those things are going to work?” asked Drake.
“For the fiftieth time, yes they’re going to work! You need to put some trust in Krytien,” said Janik.
Steel And Sorrow (Book 2) Page 41