by Brynne Asher
I flip her to her back and she complains, startled by my quick move
“Why did you do that?”
I crawl over her, raised on all fours, and give her a small frown. “Slow down, baby.”
She exhales in a huff, a look mixed with confusion and regret bleeds over her features when her voice dips. “What’s wrong?”
“Addison,” I start quietly and lower my body to hers. I partly cover her, pinning her to the bed so I can still run my hand down the center of her body as I look into her eyes. “I like everything with you. Even though I look forward to taking you fast and hard at times, our first time’ll be anything but. You’re not getting your hands on me before I get mine on you. You need to relax for me.”
I run my fingers down her stomach and trace the top of her panties barely dipping my fingers inside the hem. She closes her eyes and tries to bury her face in my neck. “I find it hard to relax, Crew.”
“Ever?” I ask against her temple as my fingers move slowly, feeling how wet she is over her panties. I circle her clit through the material, giving her barely a touch.
“Pretty much,” she whispers, her lips moving on my skin.
I dip my fingers inside to find her dripping and her body jerks at my touch. She’s running hot, but I have no idea what’s going on with her. The sooner I find out, the better. I keep whispering against her hair. “No one’s ever taken their time with you?”
Her hand clamps my forearm as her body tenses. “Please quit talking.”
I run my index finger lightly through her wet core, bound and determined to figure out what’s going on with her. “Addison, look at me—”
But the moment I speak, the beeps to her security system break into the moment, alerting the fact a door has been opened. Ringing loud from the keypad on the wall by the threshold, I thought she was tense before, but nothing compared to now.
“What the hell,” I start and begin climb from the bed. The beeps stop and we hear, “Yoo-hoo!” calling from far away in the house.
Addison grasps my shoulders, pulling me toward her bare body, whispering, “It’s Bev.”
I drop to her, completely covering her as I turn my head to yell over my shoulder, “We’ll be down in a minute!” When I look back to Addison, I bite out, “I’m changing your locks.”
“Get off. I need to get up.” She tries to push me off.
“No.”
Her voice turns frustrated as she drawls my name. “Crew.”
“I’ll let you up, but be prepared for a discussion. Tonight. I can read your body, and it’s saying it wants me as much as I want you. But I can’t make it good for you when you’re trying to wrestle me. I promise it won’t be anything but good for you—and if you let go, it’ll be fucking great.”
I see her building up her walls that were down two minutes ago. “I was not wrestling you, and there’s nothing to talk about.”
“I think you just proved there is. I’ve gotta get you to relax, baby. We’ll figure that out tonight.”
There’s a hint of attitude in her voice when she says, “I might be busy tonight.”
I grin. “With what? And before you lie to me, remember I have cameras everywhere. I’ll know if you have a party going on.”
Her eyes narrow with annoyance. “There’s no event, but that doesn’t mean I might not have plans.”
I lean in to kiss her quickly. “You have plans all right. With me. Get dinner from Maggie and I’ll be here at seven. We’re getting an early start.”
I shift my weight, but she grabs my arm, stopping me, and I see her eyes go big. “An early start to what?”
I pull away and reach for my clothes on the floor. Not taking my eyes off her, I adjust my raging hard-on, which is gonna suck. Her eyes dance up and down my body as I do. When I begin to yank on my jeans, I say with complete determination, “Tonight, my complicated Addison, I’m gonna figure you out. Before you fall asleep in my arms again, you’ll be nothing but relaxed.”
Her eyes widen as she fists the covers over her tits. I bend to grab my shirt and shoes, regretting leaving her practically naked in bed. I’ve got to count how many locks need to be replaced and add the hardware store on my long list of shit to do today. No one’s walking in on us again.
I need uninterrupted time with Addison Wentworth.
And it’s gonna happen. Tonight.
Chapter 14 – I Can Keep a Secret
Addy –
I stand in the spacious entryway of my old farmhouse that acts as a corridor to every room on the main floor of my home. It’s flanked by the front and back doors with the ornate stairway at the back of the house.
Ignoring the centuries of old charm surrounding me, I frown as Crew stands from where he’s been crouched, working on my doorknob. He tests my new key before slamming the antique door shut. His eyes come to me at the same time I hear my deadbolt flip easily into place.
“There.”
I frown deeper and cross my arms. “That wasn’t necessary.”
“Too many people have access to your home, Addison,” he says resolutely. “Next up, you need to change your security code.”
“Only my small circle of employees knows it. I trust them.”
“I don’t care if they are trustworthy. It’s too many people.” He starts packing up the small box of tools he brought over two hours ago.
In fact, I wasn’t even here yet when he helped himself to changing my locks. We were finishing up from a small event late this afternoon when I saw him drive by in his old pickup truck. We had three events today and it was busy. I had to square up some things in the main building and Crew was here for an entire hour before I got home. He got into my house, disarmed my security system—even though I still haven’t given him a key or the code—and he’s worried about the people I’m closest to and trust?
I’ve been feeling petulant all day after he left me in bed this morning when he threatened to “figure me out,” leaving me in a state of horny I hadn’t seen in…ever, really. So much so, I almost brought him a salad with no meat for dinner. He’s a big guy—no way would a salad fill him up. I’m all out of barbeque chips, and besides my Laffy Taffy, I don’t keep a lot of snack food in the house. I’m barely here as it is.
As irritable as I was, I couldn’t make him eat only a salad. So I ordered enormous turkey sandwiches layered with brie, thinly sliced green apples, and spring mix with honey mustard on cranberry wheat bread. It’s a new Maggie creation this summer and one of my favorites. She added sides of fruit. When I told her it was for Crew and me, she threw in pastries and a container of meats and cheeses. Over the past few days, Crew, Grady, and Asa have been eating at the Café daily. Not to mention, Clara has a big mouth. Everyone knows who Crew is and what he is to me, even though I’m still trying to define what we are in my head.
Currently, he’s my locksmith whom I’m not too happy with.
He took a break from his locksmith duties to eat, scarfing down his dinner in record time. He thanked me as he kissed me on the forehead and left to finish his task before I was halfway done with my meal.
By the time I finished eating and found him at my front door, he was finishing up.
“It’s only five people, Crew. I’m going to have to give Morris a new key anyway. He’s not only the caretaker of the property, but I pay him extra to maintain this house since there’s so much I can’t do myself. He’ll need a key.”
He sets his toolbox by my front door and shrugs. “I can help you with the house.”
“What I’m trying to explain to you, Crew Vega,” I stress his name, “is that I’ve managed just fine for the last year-and-a-half. I don’t mind my employees coming in when they need to, or even want to. In fact, I like that they want to be here.”
“That’s fair.” He moves to me and tags my hand, heading toward my stairs. “But you like me here, too. Right?”
I raise an eyebrow and can’t keep the snark out of my voice when I mutter, “I thought I did, but I’m ret
hinking it.”
He smiles. “Well, when I have you like I had you this morning, it would be nice if they knocked. Now they’ll have to knock.”
“What are you doing?” I ask, even though I know what he’s doing since he did the same thing last night, pulling me up to my bedroom.
“I’m going to figure you out, Addison. I’ve been thinking about it all day, and I told you I had a lot to do. I need to focus and the sooner we get this hashed out, the better.”
We make the turn to the second staircase and everything I’ve been feeling all day is coming to a head. I don’t know what more he wants to figure out—he knows everything there is to know about me. The simple fact he looks at me differently than any man ever has before makes me crazy nervous. I do know I’ve thought about it all day and decided if he’s going to demand anything more from me, I’m going to demand more, too.
I just decided to give everyone a new key. It’ll show him, I’ll just ask them to knock before using it. He can spin his wheels changing locks, my friends are welcome in my home all the time. He’ll just have to suck it up and get used to it.
He pulls me around the corner to my room. As much as he’s perturbed me with the locks, I like him everywhere in my house.
I sweep through the door, letting go of his hand. Putting a few feet between us, he stops in the middle of my room, between the door and me. I’m not sure what he’s going to say, so I stay silent. I mean, he’s kissed me in the White House, set up surveillance of my home and business, broken into my house twice, and now changed my locks. I didn’t ask, but I’m sure he kept a key for himself. Not that he needs one—he seems to get in just fine all on his own. He’s seen me mostly naked and knows all he has to do is lay a hand on my body for me to turn to mush in a heartbeat.
Oh yeah, and he knows my entire life history and all the secrets I’ve held dear for as long as I can remember. But here he is, thinking he has more “figuring out” to do.
Honestly. This has been the most bizarre week ever.
He crosses his arms and aims his dark eyes on me. Out of the blue, he starts with, “Tell me about the control.”
I frown. “What do you mean?”
“Yesterday morning, you said you needed it to cope. Tell me more about that.”
I shrug my shoulders, giving my head a little shake. “There’s nothing more to tell. I need to have a grasp on things to function. What happened the other night hasn’t happened in a long time, Crew. Probably not since my late teens. I don’t know why you’re asking about this.”
“Because you don’t need it with me. Because I know all there is to know, Addison. With me, you can let it go.”
“You’re expecting an awful lot, Crew.” I tip my head before stressing my words. “Especially when you give me nothing in return.”
I know he knows what I’m talking about, because he narrows his eyes and the sharp takes over. His body doesn’t give it away, but his dark eyes do. Even though I’ve barely known him a week, I see it. It’s startling because he’s been nothing but warm with me since the night of the White House dinner.
“See?” I say softly. “I might not know you well, but I see what just happened. That shield has disappeared with me the last couple of days, but there it is again. You’re guarded and closed off when you want me to be everything but. I’ve got an issue with that.”
He doesn’t take his eyes off me, but he scarcely shakes his head.
There’s no beating around the bush, I have to know. “Why do you have clearance with the CIA?”
“Addison—”
“What have you been doing the past ten years?”
His voice turns as sharp as his eyes when he tries to squash my efforts. “I’ve told you I can’t—”
“You said I made it all worth it,” I quickly cut in, not giving up.
This statement not only makes his mouth go tight, but his whole body as well. The sharp from his eyes leaks out, tension spreading through his strong arms crossed over his chest, slipping over his body. In all the ways I’ve seen Crew Vega in the last week, this is new.
“Addison.” His voice comes out rough, almost pained.
“I want to be worth it,” I whisper. “Let me be that for you, but let me be it completely.”
He says nothing, but his sharp eyes slowly close, shutting me out.
*****
Crew –
Fuck.
That’s a surprise. I squeeze my eyes tight and think. I wasn’t expecting this.
I wanted to figure out why she was wound like a spring in bed this morning. Hell if she didn’t turn it back on me. Why I let that slip about her making it all worth it, I have no idea.
“You have a secret?” I hear her say.
I let my head drop and exhale.
“I can keep a secret, Crew.”
Her voice, soft and smooth, breaks through to me and I look up.
Not taking a break, she keeps hitting me in the gut.
“I think I’ve proven that over the last twenty-five years, don’t you?”
I shake my head at her relentlessness.
She even has the nerve to flip her hand out and half grin when she keeps on. “And since you know everything there is to know about me, you know it’s true.”
“Enough,” I counter on a sigh.
“Well?”
“It’s not only that I shouldn’t tell you, but I don’t want to tell you, Addison. I don’t want you to know that part of me.”
It’s true. I’m not afraid of anything, but with what I’ve done and what I’m training others to do, I don’t want to risk her knowing. It could only go two ways. With her past and what she’s lived through, she could high-five me. Or, she could be disgusted and tell me to get the fuck out, never wanting to lay eyes on me again. I don’t gamble. I’m calculated, measure every risk I face. I want her too much, it’s a fifty-fifty shot I’m not anxious to take.
“Why?” She tips her head with a look of confusion. “In the past few days, you’ve gone out of your way to protect me, show me you want me, and tell me things I didn’t know about my father. I’ve given you my trust for no other reason than because it felt right. But something you don’t know about me, Crew, is I don’t enter into things lightly. I grew up having to look over my shoulder as a necessity. As fast as things have happened between you and me, you’re standing right here because I want you here. You might be pushy, but I’m no pushover. No way would you be here if I didn’t want you.”
I even my breathing before responding. “You can say that now. You don’t know.”
“Maybe it’s time you give me a little blind trust, then. Try me, Crew. I dare you,” she says with attitude.
My face cracks from her remark. “You dare me?”
She says nothing but raises her eyebrows, as if to silently double-dog-dare me.
I sigh, giving her an ultimatum. “You can’t tell me to get the fuck out without me explaining.”
Her face turns surprised. “Is it that bad?”
“Give me your word, Addison. I’ll give you what you want, but I won’t let you end what we’ve started over this. No fucking way.”
“Fine,” she breathes, giving her head a little shake. “You have my word.”
She’d better mean it, there’s no fucking way I’m gonna let her kick me out now. Not for this anyway. I planned to tell her down the road, when things progressed. I wanted her in deep, where there was no way she could walk away from me.
One thing’s for fucking sure, it never occurred to me I’d be standing here after ten years, questioning my decisions for the first time ever. I’ve never questioned a decision in my life.
“Crew?” She breaks into my thoughts, becoming restless.
I decide there’s nothing to do but throw it out there. “I don’t have an official title, but some would call me a Soldier of Fortune.”
She looks perplexed. “I don’t know what that is.”
“I contracted with governments. Ours and our fore
ign allies. I only worked abroad, never here in the States.”
“Okay,” she adds carefully. “Why couldn’t you tell me that?”
“Because I did for them what they couldn’t do, not even their troops, and they paid me well to do it. I didn’t get into it for the money, I did it because at that time in my life, a long time ago when I signed on, it was important to me.”
It’s the truth. Nothing was more important to me at the age of twenty-three. There’ve been many days over the years I wondered where I’d be if the opportunity never arose. But I never regretted it, never imagined this moment. A day I’d have to explain myself—maybe defend myself—and hope to God a good woman would forgive me for it.
In ten years, I never conceived today. But here I am.
And here it goes. When I see the color leave her face and her eyes widen, I take a step closer, but she instinctively steps back.
Her words come out in a rush. “Wait, what did they pay you to do?”
“Addison,” I start as I reach for her.
“What did they pay you to do?” she repeats, louder than the last.
I pull my hand back and try to even my tone, explaining calmly. “I was paid to eliminate threats. All kinds of threats, but in the past few years, mostly terrorism.”
“Eliminate?” Her voice disappears into a whisper.
My jaw goes hard, answering in a single clipped word. “Yes.”
She keeps whispering. “You didn’t arrest them, did you?”
I exhale and say firmly, “No.”
Surprisingly she stands her ground, not wavering. There’s no doubt in my mind she now understands what I’ve done the past ten years.
“You killed them,” she states.
“Yes.”
“You were a contract killer,” she goes on.
I pause, trying to figure out what she’s thinking. “Yes.”
“You worked for governments to kill people?” her voice comes louder.
“No,” I quickly refute. “I never officially worked for anyone. Like I said, some might call me a Soldier of Fortune, but I wasn’t a soldier for anyone. If I was caught or captured, not one person would lay claim to me. Those who contracted my services would deny any connection, including our own CIA. I worked at my own risk, but I did it knowing it was the right thing to do. I knew it then, and I know it now.”