by Alexa Davis
When I released her, she kissed me hard and pulled my lower lip between her teeth, sucking it hard as I felt her tighten around me, squeezing down as she came screaming into my mouth. I felt her drag me over the edge with her and came hard and fast, slamming into her and holding her there until I could breathe again.
I collapsed to the side and dragged her onto me, where she lay draped over me, scratching Skipper’s ears as he popped his head up to check on us. Realizing we were going to be still, he jumped up onto the bed and settled himself at the foot of it after turning in circles and nosing the bedding into the semblance of a nest around him.
“This wasn’t what I had planned,” I confessed as we lay in each other’s arms. “I brought food. It’s out in the living room.”
She laughed, a low and feminine sound that made my body consider round two an actual possibility. “You could have just let me put clothes on,” she reminded me. I snorted.
“Now you’re talking crazy, woman,” I chided her. She laughed again and snuggled into my side.
“I hate to admit it, but I’m starving,” she said, pushing closer into my side.
“Me, too, darlin’. Why don’t you just throw on a robe and see what Patty set aside for us from dinner. Rachel nodded her head and slipped into a short kimono, tying the belt around her waist to keep it from falling open. My face must have shown my annoyance with her modesty because she laughed out loud and leaned over to kiss me chastely.
“Feed me now, and I’ll take it off for you again later,” she assured me as I slipped my jeans back up over my hips. I decided to forego the belt and shirt and followed her out to the living room after trapping Skipper behind the bedroom door.
The fire had burned down a little and the room was toasty and inviting as we sat and I poured her a glass of the sparkling, white wine. At first, we ate in silence, attacking the food like starving people. After a few minutes, our hunger sated, we slowed down and picked at the fruits and cheese, going over the events of the day.
I admitted that Verica’s willingness to wade in had won me over, and I was planning to cancel the other interviews. I didn’t bother sharing that a few had already canceled, not wanting to be associated with anyone who would consider working with her.
Finally, at the moment I’d been rehearsing and waiting for, I kept finding ways to postpone it, picking at the food, massaging Rachel’s shoulders until she was nearly asleep, and clearing away the remnants of supper. Out of distractions, I looked over at Rachel, who was watching me with a pleased smile on her face.
“What are you thinking?” I asked, suddenly self-conscious.
“Just thinking about how nice it will be to go to bed with you tonight,” she replied, lifting her knees to her chin as she sat on the floor. The view from my seat across the blanket was enough to make my mouth go dry and I gathered myself together to finally say what I needed, even if only to get past it and back inside her, where I belonged.
“Rachel, you have changed a lot about this place since you arrived,” I began, sitting closer to her and taking her hand in mine. She put her knees down and watched me intently. I pulled the ring out of its hiding place in the basket and opened the box for her to see the softly glinting stone in its setting.
“Daniel, what?” she began to ask before I cut her off.
“Just let me finish, before I lose my nerve.” I swallowed hard and continued. “I can’t remember my life before you, and I can’t imagine it if you leave.” I knelt on one knee and plunged ahead. “Marry me, Rachel. Be my wife and my partner, and I won’t let you down.” I held the ring in front of me as she sat there, a stunned look on her face.
“Oh, Daniel, I wasn’t expecting this,” she breathed, and I saw the telltale shaking begin in her hands. “I can’t marry you, Daniel. It’s just not fair.” She sniffed and hid her face in her hands while I sat there holding the ring. The room spun and I blinked slowly, trying to figure out what to do next. I had promised myself I wouldn’t beg if she said “no,” but the words escaped unbidden from my lips.
“Why?” the word echoed harshly in the rafters. “How isn’t it fair?” I tried to keep my tone level, but bile rose in my throat. Instead of pulling away, Rachel collapsed into my lap, and I flinched as a low wail came from her.
“I can’t give you babies, Daniel,” she sobbed in a half-whisper, her tears hot on my leg. “I just can’t. You’ve seen the scars. You know I’m telling you the truth.” She sat up and wiped her nose on the sleeve of the cotton robe. “I wanted to tell you, but I was afraid it was too much to share, that it would be forward of me to assume our relationship was even going there.” She breathed deeply and controlled her tears.
“You can’t marry me because you can’t get pregnant. You can’t get pregnant because that piece of trash put you in harms’ way and you almost died,” I said the words carefully, but the more I spoke, the angrier I knew I sounded.
“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have wasted your time,” she said softly from her sleeve as she wiped the tears from her cheeks. “You were so wonderful. I just couldn’t resist being with you as long as I could.” She sniffed again and stared at the floor.
“I’m not asking you to be my baby machine,” I scolded her. “I’m marrying you because you’re the woman I never knew I could even dream about.” I tipped her face up and forced her to look at me. “I’m asking you because I don’t want to live another day without knowing that you will be mine forever.” I fought the frustration I felt as she looked at me in shock.
“You want to marry me even though I can’t give you a son to carry on the family business?” she asked, amazed that it was even a possibility.
“I’d marry you if it meant I only had another year at the ranch,” I replied. “But, that’s not going to happen, because you’re going to stay forever, right?” I waved the ring under her nose like a bribe. She laughed and cupped my face in her hands.
“No,” she declared, adding to it before I could even pull away. “There are a couple of things we have to work out first.” She kissed my numb lips. “I can’t just quit school, and I won’t just quit you,” she pointed out, softening the blow. “I appreciate that you want me in spite of my…issues.” Rachel took the ring from my hand and closed the box, after giving it a look of longing.
“So, you’re not saying no, you’re saying…” My voice trailed off and I waited for her to finish the sentence.
“I’m saying, as soon as I know my past isn’t going to hurt your future, and as soon as I know I can still finish the work I need to do at school, I would be delighted to be your wife, even if all I’m good for is mucking stalls and forcing tubes into horses’ orifices.” She smiled. I opened the box and took out the ring.
“Then there’s no reason not to wear this,” I pointed out. “Just because we’re not setting a date doesn’t mean you get to walk around looking like you’re available, woman,” I growled at her. I slid the filigreed platinum over her slender finger, watching the diamond wink in the firelight.
“It’s beautiful,” she admitted, her eyes shining with unshed tears.
“It’s one of a kind, just like the owner,” I boasted, running my fingers through her damp hair. “And don’t think I’m letting you off the hook with this ‘my past will hurt you’ horse-pucky, either.” I waved my finger in front of her face until she giggled. “Your past, and my past, are not things we have to handle alone.” She climbed into my lap and I tried to focus on the matter at hand, instead of her tight, bare bottom resting on my thighs.
“You know he’ll probably make more trouble for you if he finds out. Can we at least keep it a secret?” she asked me in a whisper. I wrapped my arms around her and silently promised myself to hunt Steed down and teach him the meaning of repentance.
“It doesn’t have to leave the ranch,” I agreed. “But everyone already knows I was asking, so it won’t exactly be a secret,” I admitted. I ran my fingers over the cool skin of her thighs as I watched her preen and move the ri
ng in the firelight, making little sounds of pleasure as she held it up for us both to see.
“It’s a beautiful ring,” she mused. “But what makes it even prettier is that it means you chose me.” I thought for a moment about what she’d said.
“Actually, you are the one wearing it, so by your words, what really makes it beautiful, is that you, chose me,” I argued gently.
I moved her hair away from her neck and kissed her softly moving my way up to her temple and sliding my hand into her kimono at the same time. As my hand slid over her breast, clamping her nipple between my fingers and kneading it to attention, she opened her mouth to me and we kissed. As I lay her down on the blanket and opened her robe, I thought to myself that for such a rough start, the day had turned out almost better than I’d planned.
Chapter Nineteen
Rachel
I tried to put the night before out of mind as I checked in on Dancer and Pete as the sun rose. Skipper was by my side and even he was more quiet and obedient than usual, affected no doubt, by the smells and sounds of the medical suite. I’d left my engagement ring, and Daniel, in my bedroom. The one, I’d left for privacy’s sake, the other so he could sleep off the wine and amazing feats of stamina he’d surprised me with the night before.
I knew I should’ve just said “no” and left it there. There were so many ways for us to go wrong still. I’d been with Jason for three years, and in the end, he’d burned me in ways I didn’t realize happened in reality. How could I possibly think that I could have forever with a man who hardly knew me, who hadn’t known me before I was so bruised and damaged to the core? But, he accepted the damage. So, maybe if he still felt the same way once school started and I wasn’t around all the time, we could make it work.
My stomach churned thinking about the attempted character assassination that had followed the car accident, with me as the primary target. Anything and everything that could be said about a woman was heaped on me like compost on a garden bed, and I would not let that happen to Daniel and his family. I planned to wait until after Verica’s welcoming party that night, but then I had to talk to the Hargraves about my experience and damage control. Because I knew the kind of people they were dealing with, who had the money and free time to waste on ruining lives just for the hell of it.
I looked into the medical suite as quietly as I could. Pete was curled up in a ball in the corner, while Verica sat watch with Pretty Dancer. She had a steaming coffee mug in her hand and looked no worse for the wear, for which I was grateful and again marveled at the clockwork organization and effortless running of the ranch under Hannah’s watchful eye. I knocked quietly to warn her of my entry and she turned and smiled up at me before casting a possessive and admiration-filled glance at our sleeping horse master.
“He let me sleep all night. I feel guilty; I’ve only been up for about an hour,” she whispered. Dancer stirred, and a quick check of the heart monitor and oxygen saturation meter brought a sigh of relief and a stupid grin to my face.
“What a strong, brilliant girl you are!” I said to Dancer as I stroked her nose. She nickered and nodded profusely in response, and the jockey and I both had to stifle giggles. I loosened the straps on the sling a little, to allow Dancer some small movement and test her ability to hold her own weight, but left the winches alone until Dr. Pallace returned to reexamine her.
Daniel came up behind me and grabbed me when I jumped. He mouthed “sorry” and put his arms around me, frowning slightly when he held up my hand and the ring wasn’t there.
“I’ve got mucking to do,” I replied to his silent scolding in a stage whisper. “I can’t wear it while I’m shoveling horseshit, even in gloves.” I raised my eyebrows at him, and he grudgingly nodded agreement. I ignored the flip my stomach did and asked him if he’d eaten.
“No, I imagine I had exactly the same first thought you did. How is she?” Daniel asked. He checked the machines as I had just done, and watched me as I forced my hands into latex gloves and checked her mouth, nose, and specifically, the two bite marks.
“Granted, this is my first ‘in real life’ snake bite, but I think she’s doing really well,” I asserted. I shone my penlight into her eyes and her pupils dilated appropriately. “I won’t make any definite claims. That’s for Dr. Pallace,” I conceded. “But, I see nothing that seems to suggest she isn’t getting better.” Verica heaved a sigh behind me.
“I trust your word,” Daniel stressed. “I suggest you ladies go get breakfast while I take the watch, and then we’ll set up a rotation until the doc arrives to confirm what I’m sure is your more than adequate prognosis.” He kissed me gently and shooed us out the door before either of us could contradict him.
We walked quietly for the length of the paddock, as though there was a heaviness that surrounded the entire stable that we couldn’t speak over. As we approached the house, the feeling abated, and Verica thanked me for going to the mat for her.
“I always stand up for the people who stand by their animals.”
Her gushing compliments were difficult to hear. No one should have put this girl, younger even than me, in a position to be grateful because I’d told the truth and done what any decent person should. I shrugged off the compliment and at the sad look on her face, slipped an arm around her shoulder and gave her a quick hug.
“Do you know where I am on the list?” she asked so nonchalantly, I had to hide a smile behind my hand.
“After last night, I think you ARE the list,” I confided. Patty met us on the back veranda with a coffee in each hand, switching Verica’s lukewarm cup for the fresh one without a word. She nodded us toward the table and we sat under the dim, flickering strings of light as close as we could to the fireplace that adorned the end of the massive back deck. Warming our behinds with the early morning fire as we warmed our hands with the hot coffee, we sat in quiet companionship until Hannah appeared with hot biscuits, fresh squeezed orange juice, and a plate of thick-cut bacon. Patty was close behind with a tureen of country gravy and a platter of sausage and scrambled eggs.
Verica loaded up her plate and I snatched a couple of big, fluffy biscuits, dropping them on my plate as my fingers stung in complaint against the heat. I split them open and spread churned butter over them, then drizzled them with the honey Hannah harvested from the ranch beehives. The crisp smell of morning was punctuated by the fragrant biscuits and heavenly smells of the bacon and sausage as I closed my eyes and breathed in the wonder of living so close to the earth, exactly the way I had always imagined.
When I opened my eyes, Hannah and Patty were speaking quietly to Daniel, who looked over at me and winked. His slow smile and the utterly masculine way he looked me over made me blush, and I prayed the dim, pre-dawn light hid my dismay from the men who were now loping up to the table, all of whom looked like sleep hadn’t been kind to them. At my questioning look, Hugh yawned and admitted they’d sat with Pete for much of the night, playing cards, helping with snacks, and trying to keep his spirits up.
I sniffed as tears nipped at my eyelashes. Hannah beamed over the table like the proudest momma, and even Jackson slid into an empty seat, rubbing his eyes and groaning his wordless complaints at the early hour.
“Why are you up?” I asked him as I slid several slices of bacon and a biscuit onto his plate.
“I didn’t go to bed until Verica took the watch. I was on the laptop all night, going over symptoms and whatever for Pete.” I glanced at Hannah, who fluttered her hands and clasped them over her heart.
“Pete was real grateful to be able to see that she wasn’t getting worse, even by the online doctors’ articles,” Hugh piped up, lifting a tumbler of juice in a toast to Jackson.
“Good job, Jackson,” I said to him. He nodded and smirked at me with a mouthful of food. Verica chuckled and I rolled my eyes.
“Did you look at her yet, Doc?” Hugh asked. I glanced up expecting to see Dr. Pallace, but surprised that he’d be back so early. To my eternal consternation, Hannah, P
atty, the men, even Verica and Daniel were all looking at me.
“’Scuse me?” I choked, trying to swallow and talk at the same time.
“Do you think Dancer is okay?” Hugh repeated. I shot Daniel a look, and he beamed back at me and motioned for me to answer.
“Well, considering I’m not an actual doctor yet…” I cleared my throat and continued carefully. “As far as I could tell, with the limitations of my level of expertise, which is not expert at all, Dancer seemed to be doing remarkably well, especially since she was bitten twice and wasn’t treated as immediately as would have been preferred.” I glanced around at the nodding heads of the men and Daniel’s proud grin.
“Well, men, the chores won’t do themselves, and breakfast is getting cold. Eat up and roll out,” Hannah commanded the hands before she disappeared back into the kitchen. Daniel read the roster and the guys shoveled food into their gaping maws and shuffled off. Suddenly, Jackson, Verica, Daniel, and Patty were the only occupants of the table.
Verica glanced from me to Daniel and back again, surreptitiously sneaking peeks at my unadorned hand in between. Daniel sighed and stared me down, and I slid my hand under the table to change the subject. Of course, Jackson had missed the interaction and dove right in, per his usual fashion.
“Hey, Daniel, did you punk out or what?” he asked, ignoring my glare.
“I did not, as a matter of fact, but we thought we’d hold off on announcements, considering the state of things right now. Let’s make sure Dancer is okay first, Bud.” Daniel averted calamity calmly and deftly steered the conversation back to the most important matter at hand, and saved me from a manufactured explanation.
By the time the sun was over the trees, the four of us had found our way back to the stables and met Dr. Pallace, who as it turned out, had indeed made the drive in the dark to check on our Pretty Dancer before he needed to be at his clinic. He was very upbeat and positive in his prognosis, and even happier when Patty brought out a steaming to-go cup of her amazing coffee, swirling with thick, fresh cream. He cautioned us to keep Dancer still and feed her carefully for the next day, limiting her food intake and watching her fluids, and promised to be back the next day, with the hope of removing her restrictions.