The wine tasted crisp and fresh and was a nice distraction.
“Thank you, Cameron,” I said.
He grinned. “I didn’t cook it.”
“You know what I mean. Thank you for caring enough to do everything you’ve done for me.”
“So you’re out of the ‘you’re a bastard’ phase?”
“I’m still not quite sure how you did it, but I feel… reborn.”
“Can’t have my submissive sad, now can I?”
But I wasn’t his submissive anymore, and my heart wrenched with the thought. I refused to cry again, couldn’t have him see me weak and validate his theory I wasn’t strong enough to stay.
He turned to better look at me and rested his head on his hand. “Eat, Mia.”
Cameron still made my insides coil and then liquefy. I took another bite of salmon, hoping his stare would cease its penetration.
So now you want to look at me, Mr. Cole? Now that I’m dressed in a Babydoll and in bed with you? All I could think of was if he planned on making love to me. Maybe a goodbye fuck? I really needed him inside me right now, and the thought of all this small talk continuing for much longer caused a shiver.
“Cold?” he said.
I took a sip. “The wine’s warming me.”
Cameron placed his glass down on the bedside table. “I’m so proud of you. You faced your demons bravely and now you can move forward and live the life you’re destined for.”
“What kind of life is that?”
“Whatever kind you want it to be.”
“I want it to be here with you. I want you to continue my training.”
He leaned over and ran his fingers through my hair. “You’ll feel differently in the morning. Get some sleep.”
“Can we talk about it?”
“The decision is made.”
That was it then. The decision was made. Yet again I’d been removed from the process. I feigned understanding, not wanting to cause a scene and validate his doubt.
“How are you feeling?” he said.
“Content.” I gave a half truth.
Leaving here wasn’t going to be easy.
“Goodnight, my darling.” Cameron climbed out of bed. “Maybe I’ll drive you home.”
He gave me a drop-dead smile before leaving.
In a fog, I found an assortment of toiletries in the bathroom and took my time to use each of one, like the Estee Lauder cleanser and face cream and the gold colored hairbrush. I cleaned my teeth with what looked like a titanium toothbrush. Maybe I’d be allowed to keep it as a souvenir? A piece of Cameron.
My fingers traced where my collar had been. I missed it terribly. Had I not been so tired, I’d have snuck downstairs and back to that dungeon to retrieve it and put it back on.
The thought of having to leave here, leave him, made me want to scream, and clenching my fists into balls, I stared at myself in the mirror.
“If you don’t go after want you want now, you never will,” I told myself.
Cameron had been very persuasive. His look of intention proved that changing his mind would be impossible. I could add Mr. Stubborn to his list of titles.
I headed back into the bedroom and climbed onto the king size bed, wondering if I’d be able to sleep knowing he was a few doors down. Tucked under the covers, I peered upward, not surprised to see the chain and leather cuffs waiting for some lucky submissive. Jealous of this faceless girl that would get to be secured within them by Cameron and have his precious time, I willed myself into nothingness.
And drifted off.
With no clock in here, it was impossible to judge the time.
But it was still dark outside.
I checked to see no one else was wandering the corridors and began my search, not wanting to be caught wearing this see-through Babydoll. Three doors down, I found Cameron’s bedroom.
He was in bed, resting back against a tall leather headboard and wearing those round rimmed glasses, looking all scholarly while reading from an iPad. All he had on was PJ bottoms, his chest naked revealing that muscular torso. Whatever he was immersed in gave me the time to admire this delicious eye-candy. The man who I desperately needed to be my master.
I quietly closed the door and made my way around the other side of the bed, tiptoeing as I went.
His chestnut gaze found me.
“You can’t sleep either?” I climbed onto the bed beside him.
“Love breaking rules, do you?” He leaned over and pulled the comforter back. “I’m going to have to keep a very special eye on you.”
“There are all these noises outside my room.” My toes curled at being close to him again. “This place isn’t haunted is it?”
“Not as far as I know,” he said. “No one has ever died here.”
“There’s always a first time.”
He laughed. “Please don’t tell me you have a hidden agenda, Ms. Lauren.”
“Only to be the best submissive you’ve ever had.”
“Mia—”
I sat up. “No, hear me out, please. You revealed to me what really happened to me and now I remember it. The shame and guilt I’ve had all my life never needed to be carried. All that wasted time. All those years I held back on what I wanted because I didn’t believe I deserved it.”
Cameron placed his iPad down by his side and then shifted position to look at me.
“I deserve to choose what I want to do with my life now,” I continued. “That’s my prerogative. My heart is telling me to stay. To be with you. To have you show me all that you can. And I refuse to leave. I am not leaving. You’re not kicking me out.”
He blinked at me. “Keeping you here is out of the question. It would be unethical. I’d be taking advantage of you. You need to be far away from this place.”
“Look at me,” I said. “You’ve seen everything I’ve been through. How unfair life has treated me. Choices have been taken away. Lies told. Now I see the truth. I want this. Never am I happier then when you are mastering me, guiding me into subspace. I belong here. It’s helping me heal. You know it is. You would never have given me to Richard had I not—”
“Given is a strong word. You have free will.”
“And I want to stay here.”
“Sleep on it.”
“Throw me out and I’ll camp on the front lawn.”
“You are so stubborn, Ms. Lauren.”
“I know what I want and I know what I need.”
He sucked his bottom lip, looking thoughtful and so damn handsome in those round rimmed glasses.
I poked his ribs. “Am I or am I not your fucking submissive?”
“Did you swear at me?”
“Maybe.”
“You must listen to me.”
“I can help you with your clients.”
“You’re still talking?”
“Yes, evidently I am, and no, I won’t change my mind in the morning.”
“I can still hear you.”
“Because you gave me the courage to speak. I see what you do here. I see the importance of your work. This is no ordinary manor. It saves lives. I am in awe of what you accomplish and how you do it. I am so proud of those who come here as their authentic selves. This place is more than I ever realized. More than I ever knew possible. I will be proud to stand beside you as your submissive. Because I understand that the woman who holds that title represents the sacred female who has overcome life and gives herself over with full consent because she can. She is the epitome of the empowered. Now I understand. I own my sexuality.”
“Mia.” His tone was commanding. “Yes, you do—”
“I deserve this title. Have I not proven that I am strong enough to hold it? Have everyone here know that I am yours.” I pointed at him. “Your equal.”
“I’m delighted that you understand how we honor the role of our chosen submissive—”
“Am I worthy of this title?”
“Undoubtedly, but if you will be quiet for just one second—”
He was holding a manila folder.
“What is that?” I said.
“A contract.”
I sucked in a gush of air. “Our contract?”
“Maybe.”
Blinking at him, I realized he’d needed to see my strength, needed to hear from me that I wanted to stay. “Tell me it is.”
His stare was intense.
I fell against his chest, planting kisses there, my body trembling against him. “I’m still your submissive?”
“The matter is still under consideration.”
With more kisses, I worshiped him, showing how much I wanted and needed this. I reached down for him, my fingers feeling beneath the waistband of his PJ’s and farther down and soon finding him, wrapping my hand around his silky hardness.
He caught my wrist and pulled my hand away, saying, “There’s plenty of time to prove you’re a good submissive.”
My heart leaped with joy.
“You’ve come a long way,” he said. “Your experience may very well be an asset.”
My tears returned but they were of joy, of relief, and resting with my ear over his heart I was soothed by its strong and steady beat. “So I will get to sign one after all,” I said, exhaling after an eternity of waiting for him.
“We need a clear and concise agreement. It’s essential that you’re completely congruent with all that I ask of you during your training. ” He raised it. “Perhaps if you still feel the same in the morning, we’ll go over it, should you have any questions.”
Tomorrow. I’ll still be here.
Despite being this close, I yearned to be closer, and would count the seconds until his affectionate words turned into tender touches.
Having a contract before would never have been practical. I saw that now. It had been imperative that I believed he held all the power. This piece of paper meant I still had some say over what happened to me.
I let the happiness in.
“I need you to understand clearly what it is I’ll be asking of you,” he said.
I didn’t know if I’d be able to wait now, and certainly not after him saying something like that. But I gave a nod that I would, and to be honest I was a little sleepy after being drawn down into this glorious feeling of relaxation. I had never felt so liberated, and it wasn’t just from that room either. Cameron had liberated me from myself. My past.
I gave a drawn out sigh of satisfaction and Cameron responded with a boyish grin. His beauty and strength made my heart dissolve and I wondered if this was what it was like to lose yourself to another. There really was no choice in the matter. It kind of snuck up on you and stole whatever it desired. He had to know the effect he was having on me. Everyone caught in Cameron’s wake fell at his mercy. There was no escaping becoming infatuated.
“I’m looking forward to you continuing my discipline,” I whispered.
He curled his fingers and brushed his knuckles over my cheek. “Sweet Mia.”
“When do I get my collar back?”
“When you’ve proven yourself worthy.”
“Not tomorrow?” I wanted everyone to see me wearing it so they knew.
“We’ll see.” He caressed my arm.
“Thank you, Sir.”
“Your skin is like silk. I can’t stop touching you.”
His caresses soothed. “Scarlet told me you’re very select on who you choose as your sub,” I said. “I’ll never take being here for granted. I know I haven’t always been easy.”
“Apologizing for being so defiant?”
“I suppose I am.”
“We have made progress.” He scrunched locks of my hair and tugged, the sting just bearable.
“I can tell you now I don’t want any anal stretching.”
“Has our feisty Mia returned?” he said, amused. “Anal plugs are a soft limit here.”
“What does that mean?”
“We can’t have ass play if we don’t prepare you first. It’s more preparation then stretching.”
“So I don’t have any choice?”
“That look in your eyes that begs me to fuck you will be the same look you’ll have when I insert your anal plug.”
I buried my face into his chest, my face ablaze.
He ran his fingers through my hair. “God, you’re beautiful.”
I peeked up at him. “Even when I’m bright red?”
“I’ll take a Mia Lauren in every color, please.” He swept his hand over my back, chuckling.
I beamed at him. “How old were you when you first discovered you were into kink?”
“Sixteen.”
“What happened?”
“It’s just something you know. You’re drawn to riskier images of sexuality and the idea of vanilla doesn’t appeal.”
“Have you ever been in love?”
“Am I being interrogated by my sub?” he said darkly.
“I want to know everything there is to know about my master. So I can please you.”
“Obey me in all things. That is how to please me.” He tapped my shoulder. “Up you get.” He climbed out of bed. “Let’s get you back to your room.”
“I can’t stay with you tonight?”
“No, Mia. Cardinal rule. We never sleep together. It prevents us from forgetting our place. Our relationship is master and sub. We will we never be lovers. And as only lovers sleep together, we must sleep apart.”
Heavy hearted, I took his hand and let him guide me out and back down the hallway.
That small quiet voice reassured me at least I’d won tonight’s challenge of persuading Cameron to let me stay.
We soon made it back to my room.
He pulled back the covers. “In you go.”
My heart almost leaped out of my chest with joy when he got into bed beside me. I forced myself to hold back on telling him what he meant to me, nervous he’d feel it necessary to withdraw his affection. I couldn’t have coped with that right now.
“At no time while you are under my supervision will you be permitted to pleasure yourself,” he said. “Understand?”
I willed his stare to focus on something other than me.
“Mia?” he said firmly.
“I won’t touch myself,” I muttered, assuming he knew his words turned me on. Oh, the irony.
“I won’t be able to sleep,” I said, defiantly.
“I have a cure for that.”
I arched a brow, wondering what he had in mind.
Cameron flipped back the covers. “Bring up your legs.” He eased my nightgown up my thighs, hoisting it around my waist, and I lifted my butt to assist. He moved each of my legs to bring up my feet and position the soles so that they touched each other. My thighs were spread wide, completely exposing my pussy.
“Proof that less is very often more,” he said.
Despite all we’d done and shared, having him dressed in PJ bottoms and me virtually naked beside him with everything on show made me blush wildly.
Cameron sat up beside my waist and crossed his legs. He placed his middle finger in his mouth and sucked, wetting the tip. Then he placed his finger on my clitoris. I raised my head to better see. Ever so slowly, he moved his finger in a small circling motion over that tight little bud.
“Remain still,” he demanded sternly. “Understand.”
I hadn’t moved yet, but the order made me want to. “Yes, Sir.” I eyed him suspiciously, wondering what he’d do next.
Yet his finger circled excruciatingly slow, keeping an even pace, his concentration only breaking for a smile when he saw my reaction. Stunned by the pleasure building there, gaping in awe, my bliss rose beneath his touch. His small encircling continued slow and sure as his fingertip massaged my clit with perfection.
Of course I’d touched myself down there before, but this, this was different. I’d never thought to go slow. My body had always yearned for faster flicking.
“Where did you learn this?” I stuttered.
>
“Silence.”
Spasms overwhelmed my pussy as it throbbed, gratified by his sternness. Willingly I submitted, resting my head back on the pillow.
“Don’t bite your lip,” he said. “You don’t have my permission to balance the pleasure with pain.”
“It’s too much.”
“Obey.”
Dying from pleasure was a real possibility right now.
His finger continued, languidly circled my clit. “I ordered you to stay in your room. Consider this your punishment.”
Cameron sent me hurtling into the stratosphere, rising ever higher. My eyes squeezed shut. The pleasure was a delicious torment.
The world slipped away.
Higher still I climbed, caught in an erotic vortex, a whirlwind of bliss, mesmerized that it was merely his fingertip encircling and never ceasing that was keeping me there, held midair in this climax. I was beholden to him, my pussy clenching and relaxing and clenching again, my hips fighting this urge to pump against his finger.
Stunned, my eyes shot open to again see the proof that all he was doing was circling my clit slowly. It wasn’t only Cameron’s skill that was remarkable, it was his patience, his desire to see this experience fully realized for me as he waited out the time it took for this never ceasing orgasm to play out. Minutes passed gloriously, dissolving into what could have been half an hour as I surrendered to this endless orgasm, panting, moaning, and trying not to writhe. My thighs trembled.
Both my scent and his cologne filled my nostrils. My every thought led back to him.
Endlessly riding this crescent, the pleasure radiated to my nipples, forcing them to become pert from this sublime bliss. I brought my hands up to cup them and soothe their rapture, their wanton desire for my master.
“Arms by your side,” he whispered.
I was caught in a blinding grip of paradise and sucked in air, trying to fill my lungs with oxygen as though I’d forgotten how to.
With limbs weak and trembling, I began my descent, freefalling back to him. He brought me down from this impossible pinnacle with strokes, and slaps, and caresses, his fingers exploring and proving once more he’d mastered the art of touching a woman.
His woman.
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