by Debra Dunbar
His spirit-self was frigid as it dug through me, cataloging what I’d lost and regained while I desperately tried to hide the red-purple of Gregory’s energy from him.
You can barely hold any energy. Your storage has dwindled to almost nothing, and your ability to convert is severely compromised. It will take centuries for those skill to re-direct elsewhere. Centuries that I will be unable to recognize any gain from our contract.
Tearing my body to bits for the last few weeks wasn’t gain? Groping me beyond what any consort would expect wasn’t gain? I could understand being upset over the delay in breeding, but he’d entered into a thousand-year contract—he surely wouldn’t be expecting the offspring of his dreams right out of the gate.
“I still devour.” My voice was beginning to take on a desperate quality. “That’s what you really wanted, isn’t it? You can contribute storage capacity and conversion from your end in the first few attempts, and I’ll supply the devouring.”
I wouldn’t, but I’d say anything to delay my execution. I winced as he merged slightly with my spirit-self, tearing his claws into the abdomen I’d just repaired. The physical I could withstand, but this rape of my soul both terrified and infuriated me. I’d never survive this demon, no matter his decision. I needed to get out. I needed Gregory. If I could just get back to him somehow, I know he’d move heaven and earth to try to help me out of this mess.
I find myself enjoying you too much to kill you. I will wait until you repair before I make my decision, and in the meantime you will be my favorite toy in all ways—physically and otherwise.
My mind whirred with thoughts of how I might escape, might find a way to the safety of my angel. Even if I got a message to him, he’d not be able to save me from Hel. I’d need to cross the gates before I could rest easy in his protection. I’d need to do it in a way that didn’t set off Ahriman’s suspicions otherwise he’d kill Leethu, Dar, and the remnants of my household.
I took a deep breath and reciprocated Ahriman’s caress, cringing as I merged his sooty spirit with mine. He shuddered in delight, and I choked back the vomit that rose in my throat.
“I… I’d like a vacation with the humans, please,” I begged, my voice as seductive as I could make it given the circumstances.
No. You just got back, and with your inability to store energy, you’d surely die. I find I do not want you to die, Az. Not yet.
I clenched my jaw and stroked against him. “I can devour. Gain my energy reserves that way. It will help me recover faster.”
He paused, and I realized there was some truth to what I’d thought were lies. An excellent idea, my imp. But you can devour here in Hel and be safe. No, you shall not go.
I pulled against his spirit-self, drawing him further in. I swear his orange eyes rolled slightly backward in his head. “I will give you a breeding occurrence now if you let me go. Just a brief vacation to spread an Ebola virus variant, grab my hellhound and hybrid horse, and I’ll be back.”
He panted, fetid breath against my cheek. Ebola is a particular favorite of mine. I will grant you this trip in exchange for a breeding occurrence, but you must return in one week. If you do not, you’ll spend the rest of your contract chained to a wall. Do you understand, Az?
“Yes.” One week. Fuck. And how I’d manage to pull off this breeding occurrence was beyond me. There was no way I was giving him the devouring skills, but I had nothing else he wanted.
Ahriman continued to partially join with me, careful to mostly remain inside his corporeal form. Once again I felt my intestines spill from a searing tear in my belly. It seemed an eternity before he’d satisfied his needs and left me bleeding on the dungeon floor. Tears pricked the back of my eyes as I began the painful process of fixing my physical form, well aware that nothing would wash away the filth that coated my spirit-self.
30
Although I was unable to accurately track time, it seemed to be a few days before the demon returned. I tensed as I saw black smoke seeping through cracks in the walls, leaving a greasy stain behind.
Let us see what you can contribute to our offspring, my consort.
I took a deep breath, pulling together the courage for the ordeal ahead. “Can we do this in a more comfortable setting? I don’t mean to complain, but I’ve been down here for ages with no food or drink.”
He tilted his head and regarded me with those orange eyes. You are broken, and the need to combat starvation and dehydration has taken a toll on your strength. How rude of me to have forgotten.
He wrapped me in darkness, transporting me with a disorienting jerk to another room. This one was warm, with a fire in a central hearth. A variety of plush seats were scattered about the room, designed to accommodate an assortment of demon forms. A tray of meats, vegetables, and breads stood by a sofa, and a glass decanter full of red liquid and two glasses sat nearby.
I dove at the tray, cramming food and drink into my mouth as fast as I could. The repast was in the elven style, and for once I didn’t bemoan the blandness. Giving up on the glass, I chugged the red liquid, which turned out to be wine. My head buzzed, and I hoped the alcohol would make what was to come less painful. Ahriman watched. I didn’t care. I was so relieved to be out of that horrible dungeon, even if only for a few moments.
Are you ready, Az? I’d finished every bite of food on the platter and drained the decanter dry. My stomach bulged out uncomfortably, but I felt the happy sleepiness that came from a meal after so long without.
“Yes.” I approached the demon and stood before him, reaching into my spirit self to section off the portions I’d offer him. I’d thought long and hard about what to give, knowing I’d need to include some of my devouring skills to pull this whole thing off.
Ahriman reached inside me, extending only a small amount of himself to receive—so much for Plan A. I’d hoped he’d risk enough contact to attempt to seize and devour him, but even when he was joining his spirit-self with mine, he’d always been careful to hold the majority of himself a safe distance away. If he’d been weak, I could have spooled him in with a touch, but an ancient demon like Ahriman wouldn’t devour easily. I’d need to be able to grab and hold at least seventy percent of his spirit-self to have a chance at taking him in.
I held forth my contribution, and he took it, retracting fully into his corporeal form as I tried to appear relaxed and casual. I’d never procreated before, my one practice attempt resulting in the death of my tutor. What happened now?
“Can I go?”
His semi-solid shape pulsed, sending out a puff of gray. Yes. One week, Az
I couldn’t help but bolt for the door, slowing to a more respectable pace as I reached a series of hallways leading out of the building. The sunshine blinded me, hitting eyes so used to the dark, and I realized that I was in Eresh, close to the angelic gate that linked Hel with Seattle.
I picked up my pace, panic creeping along the edge of my mind. How long would it take Ahriman to realize I’d given him crap, that his formation wouldn’t be able to devour so much as a bacterium? I saw the gate ahead and couldn’t stop myself from breaking into a run. Just a few more yards.
Shaking as I reached the passageway, I reached out a hand to activate the gate I’d used several times before. My hand hit the shimmering rift and passed right through. What the fuck? I tried my other hand, a foot. I threw myself through the gate, only to land flat on the gravel just beyond it. I couldn’t go through, couldn’t activate it. I’d been able to activate gates since I was a few centuries old—what had happened?
Frantic, I looked around, trying to find another demon to open it.
“You! Yeah, you with the slime-covered legs. Can you activate the gate?”
The demon slid over to me, leaving a trail of green behind him.
“Of course I can. Are you a Low or something?”
I winced. Imp wasn’t an especially high demon, and this wasn’t the first time I’d been mistaken for a Low, but it still stung. I clamped my arm to my side t
o hide Ahriman’s consort mark and nodded.
“You’re lucky.” The demon swiveled a many-eyed face toward the shimmer. “This is the only one still open. All the other gates are closed.”
No, it couldn’t be. For two and a half million years the gates had never been closed. Had Gregory gotten my message? What was going on in Aaru? I felt even more anxious to get back, especially since this gate might not remain open much longer.
“I can pay you. I’ll owe you a favor.”
The demon’s seeping eyes swept down my naked human form. “Okay. Who are you?”
“Zalanes.” He’d be pissed that I’d used his name, but since he was an imp too, it was somewhat believable. I’d have to remember to make it up to him sometime.
The round shape before me extended a damp protuberance toward the gate, and it glowed, opening to reveal the Seattle street. Relief flooded me, and my limbs felt weak. One step, and I’d be safe. Then I’d have one week to figure out what to do.
I walked forward and smashed against a hard surface, bouncing back to sprawl on the rock pathway. The slime demon burbled out what must have been laughter.
“You’ve been banished. Sucks to be you. And you still owe me a favor.”
He slid away, and I stared up at the sky in shock. Banished. I hadn’t realized the full implications of what I’d asked Gregory to do when he’d broken our binding and sent me to Hel. It wasn’t that I couldn’t activate the gates—I couldn’t use them at all. I was stuck here. Damned to Hel forever.
Numb, I stood and brushed the gravel dust from my skin. There was nowhere I could go that Ahriman wouldn’t find me. No elf would risk his kingdom to protect me, and other ancient demons wouldn’t care. I was his toy to do with whatever he wanted for a thousand years. And once he figured out I wasn’t going to give him the devouring skill he wanted, I’d be dead.
As if on cue, I smelled the thick, oily scent of burning flesh. I closed my eyes, unwilling to see what was about to form before me. Even if I did give in and let Ahriman have the devouring skills he wanted, he’d kill me. As soon as he achieved his desired offspring, and tired of playing with me, I’d be dead. And I was willing to bet it would be far sooner than in one thousand years.
I felt the air chill with a sharp bite of frost, the smell of burning flesh intensifying. I was dead either way. The best I could do at this point was ensure that Aaru was safe from his plans for the time being, and that my household was safely out of his grasp. The thick smoke choked me, burning through my lungs as I breathed. Wyatt. Amber. Nyalla. Candy. Michelle. Boomer, Diablo, Piper, and Vegas. Dar and Leethu. And Gregory. I love you all.
Claws brushed against my arms and something sharp pierced my side. I bit my tongue, trying not to cry out in pain. Az, you are an imp of disobedience and trickery. Shall we go home and try this again? Otherwise there will be no vacations for you.
I had no idea why he was so restrained. I’d expected violence, fury, my body a smear across the pavement of Eresh. Instead, he was giving me a chance to try again. I steeled my resolve. I’d give him nothing more.
“Yes. I will try again.” It would only delay the inevitable, but I found I really didn’t want to die, and another hour was better than nothing.
He gathered me in a suffocating embrace of black. I opened my eyes to the dark damp of the dungeon. This wasn’t my home. It would never be my home, although it was likely to be my grave.
31
For some odd reason, it took Ahriman a few days before he approached me to “try again”. I wasn’t sure if he needed a recovery period, or there was other business he needed to attend to. During that time, I paced the damp dungeon, practicing holding energy within me and converting my form. I was recovering my abilities. Too bad I wouldn’t have the time to fully regain them.
I cringed when I smelled Ahriman’s familiar smell, watching his smoke form coalesce in the dim light. Just as he became vaguely solid, a furred lump crashed from his arms to the floor. I stared into Dar’s one red eye, the other swollen shut, his snout covered in blood.
I would have had the succubus join us, but she is well protected at the moment.
“Fucking Wythyn elves.” Dar’s voice was slurred, but the one good eye was fierce with anger.
Yes. Shame their leader is dead. He had his uses.
It was then I noticed the silver collar around Dar’s neck. No wonder he was so physically damaged. He wasn’t able to fix any injuries with that damned thing on him.
“Let him go.” I strode toward Ahriman, clenching my fists. “We had a deal. You don’t touch my household. Any discipline of them goes through me.”
We did have a deal, Az. But you neglected to disclose your damaged state, and you’ve been duplicitous in our very first breeding attempt. Breach of contract, my dear. All bets are off.
I halted, staring down at Dar as my blood ran cold. “I’ll give you want you want.”
I’d risked Dar’s life enough—all for demons, humans and angels he didn’t care about. Gregory refused to kill me up on Devil’s Paw, but he wouldn’t hesitate to take out the monster I’d be forced to create. Would he and the other angels prevail? They were ancient and powerful, but so was Ahriman, and if he had not just one, but a small army of devouring spirits, Aaru would fall. But with my brother before me, I couldn’t choose otherwise, even with the entirety of creation at stake.
“Don’t you dare give this fucker anything!” Dar snarled.
Ahriman kicked him in the side, launching him to land at my feet. He coughed, and chunks of bloody flesh sprayed my legs.
“There are things in life worth dying for,” he whispered, blood bubbling from his mouth. “Make me proud, Mal. Be the demon I would follow through hell and back.”
My eyes stung, Dar blurring as I looked down at him. We were going to die. We were both going to die.
“Fuck you, Ahriman. I won’t give you shit.”
In a flash I was pinned against the damp wall, glowing silver restraints pinning my wrists to the stone. I didn’t have much energy, but I’d be unable to get free, unable to fix any of the damage Ahriman was sure to inflict.
Then I will just take what I want.
Ahriman dove his spirit-self into mine, easily resisting my attempts to expel him. I began a series of futile evasion tactics, trying to hide my devouring ability from him while knowing full well it was just a matter of time before he gathered whatever he wanted and ripped it from me. It didn’t take long before he’d cornered me. He reached for my devouring abilities. I closed my eyes and felt the red-purple within me, the angel-spirit I’d stolen from Gregory, leap forward, blocking him. Ahriman screamed and yanked clear of me, nearly tearing me in half in his haste to retreat.
An angel! You have part of an angel. And not just any angel, one of ancients—the Dragon Slayer, the Prince of the Presence.
I opened my eyes and saw Ahriman inches from me, his orange eyes calculating as they swept me.
You will give me what I desire. Give it to me!
We’d gone from “I’ll take it” to “give it to me”. I realized that the angel-spirit would keep Ahriman from snatching my devouring ability. His increased eagerness was easy to understand. I’d managed to tear away part of a powerful angel—probably the most powerful angel in Aaru. That kind of skill was what he so desperately needed. Too bad.
I spat at Ahriman. He grinned, before turning to Dar. I looked at my brother in apology, and saw the angry resolve in his eye. It gave me strength.
I will drive him to the point of death, and you will have a few brief moments to change your mind before he is gone forever. Just give me what I want, Az, and I will raise you to the highest state. You’ll be my equal, walk by my side as I crush Aaru under my heel. I’ll even let you finish eating that sanctimonious bastard of an angel.
I kept my eyes on Dar, drew from his strength. “I’d much rather angel-fuck that sanctimonious bastard than eat him. Rot in Hel, Ahriman.”
The demon sprouted vicious claws
on his feet and began to kick Dar, tearing sections of his abdomen with each blow. When Dar became a bloody mess of fur and flesh on the stone floor, Ahriman turned to me.
It was my turn, and it wouldn’t be quick. I thought of Gregory and realized that we’d never have our eternity of sin together. He’d mourn, but I knew in my heart he’d be proud of my decision. Would he ever know my sacrifice? Would he ever realize I’d died doing the right thing?
The right thing. This is my parting gift to you, my angel, I thought, and I opened up the place in me where all my Owned beings resided. I flew wide the doors to my soul and felt a rush as they exited. Ahriman laughed and gnashed his yellow teeth, slowly approaching.
You too, I told Samantha Martin. End of the line, girlfriend. She hesitated a moment, and just as the demon reached for me, she left, sweeping out of my spirit-being into her afterlife.
Teeth tore into my neck. I felt the muscles tear, the blood pour down into my lungs and out along my skin. I looked death in the eye and felt oddly light. Something bright and shining swam through me, like a river of fire. A river of smokeless fire. As I danced on the knife’s edge between life and death, the red-purple of Gregory’s spirit-self erupted within me, suffusing my being with a burning heat of power.
The dungeon exploded in light. I heard Ahriman scream, felt him slap against me as he pushed himself backward. The restraints that held my arms melted, dripping on the floor to smoke like white acid. I felt oddly unbalanced, as if something unfamiliar and heavy rested against my back. But it didn’t matter, because I was free, and even if I died, I was going down fighting.
I dove for Ahriman, but my physical attack was wasted on a semi-solid demon. His black surrounded me, seeping into my pores and through to my spirit-self where he hit me with a massive surge of energy. It should have split me in half. It should have killed me. It certainly hurt like fuck, but I wasn’t dead. I blasted him back, realizing my efforts were in vain. I just couldn’t pull as much energy as I used to, and Ahriman was ancient.