“Shit,” he breathed so only I could hear.
A giggle bounced out of me, and for another thirty minutes or so, after Montana had eaten two bowls of soup and five small slices of pie, Mum was finally setting him free from her food trap.
“Did you enjoy it?” she asked, her eyes hopeful.
Montana rubbed his belly, nodding. “I loved it, Mrs. Harkin. Why aren’t you a professional chef? Best food I’ve had in years.”
Her face lit up, and she capped his shoulder, pressing her lips to smile. “Why, thank you. Do you have a place to stay?” she asked.
My eyebrows stitched. “Oh, no, Mum—”
“Oh, stop it, Lauren. We have three extra bedrooms.”
“Yes, I know, but I’m sure he’d like to spend his time elsewhere,” I said, through partially gritted teeth.
Montana shrugged hard. “Are you kidding? I was going to book a hotel for a few nights in the city, but if she’s giving me a room to stay in, I don’t see why not.”
Mum smiled smugly at me. “See. Besides, I’m making my blueberry muffins and pancakes in the morning. He shouldn’t miss out. You like blueberries?” she asked him.
“Love ‘em,” Montana said, smiling down at her. I knew he was doing all of this to please her and stay on her good side. I didn’t blame him, but I knew how overbearing Mum could be, and I also knew how annoying Brent could be. The only one I wasn’t concerned about was Dad. As long as he had his flat screen TV and his favorite leather recliner, he was okay. Sometimes he would get so quiet I forgot he was around.
“Great. So, Lauren, show Montana to one of the guest rooms, and I’ll send Brent to get his things from his car.”
“Thank you, Mrs. Harkin,” Montana said.
She smiled with her eyes, but I playfully rolled mine at her and grabbed Montana’s hand, leading him out of the kitchen. “Are you sure about this?” I whisper-hissed as I reached the staircase. “I mean… my family can be a bit wild and overbearing—”
Montana placed a finger on the fold of my lips, quieting me. “I’m here to be with you, Lauren. It’s okay.” He shrugged. “Besides, your family seems cool as shit. It’ll be nice getting to know the people you grew up around.” He knuckled my chin, and I sighed, squeezing his hand and making my way up the stairs.
“Alright. If you say so.”
“I told you I wanted to visit your farmhouse anyway… it’s the shit.”
“Thanks. Mum and Dad actually helped build it.”
“Seriously? They did one hell of a job.”
We met up to the door at the end of the hallway, and I opened it. Montana stepped inside, taking a quick look around the bedroom. This was my favorite guest room. What I loved most was the canopy bed and the smooth white sheets that hung in front of the floor to ceiling window. The floorboards were polished and clean, and there was a huge bathroom with the perfect Jacuzzi tub. I envied this space. Every time I visited my parents, I’d spend most of my nights in this very room. It was perfect. “This room is way better than any hotel I’ve ever been in,” Montana said, running his hands across the sheets. “And I know I might be a cheap dick, but it’s free! How the hell can I beat that?”
I laughed. “No, the price you’ll be paying is eating everything my mum cooks and bakes. You have no idea what you’ve just gotten yourself into.”
He shook his head. “That’s better than handing over money. Plus, I love to grub. Win-win situation, Princess.” He squeezed me against his side. “Show me your room,” he murmured.
I blinked up at him. “My room?”
“Yes. I wanna see it.”
I pressed my lips. “Trust me, you do not want to see my room. It’s all girly and… ehh.”
“That’s okay,” he said, tilting my chin.
I sighed as his eyes locked with mine. The pad of his thumb ran across my chin, and I nodded, turning and making my way down the hallway. We passed by three doors before meeting in front of mine. “Okay,” I said. “Brace yourself.”
He gave a crooked smile, and I pushed the door open. I was sure the first thing he took notice of was the light pink walls. Posters covered every single wall and in the north corner was my full-sized bed. Montana walked past me, taking a hard look around.
“This. Is. Insane,” he said. His eyes caught on something, and he stepped forward quickly, running his eyes up and down one of the posters. “Wait… you came to our show in Dublin?” he asked, glancing back.
“Yeah. Well, I was just interning then, but it was fun to have a free pass backstage. It was your first show out of the U.S., right?” I asked, shutting the door behind me.
“Hell yeah,” he breathed. “Man, that was the best show of my life.” He turned, looking around the room, spotting the Dublin FireNine T-shirt and the plastic flame that came along with it pinned onto the wall. “Dude!” he burst out laughing, staring at the faded T-shirt. “Look at my hair! It was so long!”
“Hey, that mohawk is what made you stand out. It was awesome, especially when you dyed the tips for the first time. The girls went crazy.”
“I can’t believe you have all this stuff,” he said, recognizing more of the FireNine items I’d collected. “You’ve been a fan of the band for a long time, huh?” he asked.
“I was a fan way before FireNine made its breakthrough. A few of my friends used to listen to your mix tape after school every day. We fell in love.”
“Wow,” he breathed, slumping down on the edge of my bed. I took the spot beside him and looked from wall to wall with him. “It’s crazy how far we’ve come.”
“How so?” I asked.
“I don’t know. I didn’t think we’d ever make it this far. There are so many bands in this world that want to make it big… we felt like we were just another number.”
“No way,” I scoffed, bumping his shoulder. “FireNine deserves everything they have. I’m so glad you and your band are so close. I’m glad none of you have let the fame tear you apart.”
“Yeah.” He flashed a smile.
“So… how long are you going to stay here?”
“Two or three days, give or take,” he said.
I nodded. “Then you’ll be flying back?”
“The band is practicing again this weekend for the Blowout tour. All weekend long. Pretty sure my damn fingers are gonna fall off by the time we’re done.”
I laughed. “Practice makes perfect.” My gaze drifted from his, and I sighed, placing my head on his shoulder. “Montana, I’m really glad you came.”
“I’m glad too, Lauren.”
“You know, I was actually in court earlier this afternoon. The judge settled it, and the divorce will be finalized by the end of this month,” I said, sitting up to meet his eyes.
His expanded, and a slow smile spread across his lips. “Really?” he asked, his voice a pitch higher. “Shit, that’s good, babe!”
“There’s also a restraining order filed against him.”
“Good, ‘cause if that fucker would’ve tried another stunt like he did at my place again, he would’ve had his ass handed to him. Not even kidding.”
I nodded. “I know. But it won’t happen again.”
Montana looked me over, swallowing thickly as he pulled me into him. He hugged me tight, and his arms were warm as they locked around me. “I want you to promise me something,” he said after kissing the top of my head.
“Anything, Montana.”
“Promise me you won’t hide anything like that from me again. Anything you’re going through, I wanna know about. I want this to work, Lauren. No more secrets, okay?”
“Okay,” I whispered. “I promise.”
He dipped his head back, and I looked up, meeting his gentle eyes. A smile graced his lips as he leaned in, pressing his mouth on mine. I clutched the back of his T-shirt in my hands, sinking into his chest. His fingers ran through my hair and then down my sides. His touch was amazing. Everything about him was amazing.
He groaned a little as I sunk further,
spreading his lips apart and running my tongue across his. His hands landed on my ass, and he squeezed it, smiling behind the kiss. I smiled back, but I didn’t dare pull my lips away.
Before I knew it, I was lying on my back, and he was on top of me, his bottom half between my legs. I’d torn at his jeans, and he’d yanked my cotton shorts down. He was inside me in no time, and once he was there, his eyes were glued to mine. He kissed me again, delicately, as he lifted my thigh and gripped it. He stroked slow and deep, and my lips parted. It felt incredible. With his mouth on mine and our bodies grinding and rolling in harmony, we couldn’t help ourselves. It didn’t take very long for us to build up and release, and I didn’t mind it one bit. It was quick, sweet, and highly emotional. It was perfect—blissful in every way possible.
Montana’s eyes squeezed shut as he stilled within me. I gripped his shoulder blades, sighing as he buried his face into the crook of my neck, the both of us breathing through the moment.
He panted quietly, lifting his head to kiss my cheek, and I smiled over his shoulder, staring up at the stars on my ceiling.
That was just what I wanted.
He was just what I needed to feel free, beautiful, and alive again.
MONTANA
Twenty-Three
The two days I spent with Lauren and her family were a true experience. She wasn’t lying about growing up in a happy home. Her mother was sweet, and her father a real gentleman. Her brother was very protective, but, hey, she needed that after the way shit went down with the last rocker she dated. I couldn’t blame him.
When I got back home, Lauren tagged along with me. I’d promised her another day on the beach, so we headed to Virginia Beach.
“I’m excited,” she said as I parked the car.
“You get really antsy about beaches,” I teased, unclipping my seatbelt.
“Well, of course! I didn’t think I’d love the sun and water so much after living in Montrouge pretty much my whole life, but I do. It feels so good on my skin…” She rapidly freed herself from her seatbelt, pushed out of the car, and stood outside the door.
I climbed out as well, and when I looked over, her head was knocked back, her eyes closed as she pointed her face towards the sun. “Don’t complain to me when your face catches on fire, cause that’s what sunburn feels like,” I said, laughing.
She turned and placed her arms on the hood of the car, smirking. “I haven’t been sunburned before, and it won’t happen today.” It’s funny because that’s what she said, but the complete opposite happened. After spending nearly three and a half hours on the beach, she’d caught a horrible case of sunburn on her arms and chest. She whined as we made our way back to the car, and lucky for her, I had some aloe stashed in my bag.
“Why didn’t the sunblock help?” she asked, frowning as she rubbed the aloe on her chest.
I snorted a laugh as I cranked the car. “It only lasts for so long. I told you to put more on.”
“I didn’t think I needed more. I still felt greasy!”
I shrugged. “Lesson learned, babe.”
She sighed, pressing back against the leather. When I pulled onto the freeway, she reached over and grabbed my hand. I looked down, watching as she locked fingers with me. I met her eyes briefly before focusing on the road. “Thank you,” she murmured. “Although I feel like burnt bacon, I really had fun today.”
“Of course,” I said.
She smiled, squeezing my hand. Then, she said something that made my heart flutter—it always made my heart flutter. She said, “I love you, Montana.”
I brought our hands up and turned them over, kissing the back of hers. “I love you, too, Lauren.”
Her smile was soft, and by the look on her face, I could tell she was satisfied to hear me say it. Man, I couldn’t believe this. This girl was mine. After what felt like a battle, she was all mine, and I was all hers.
I never thought I’d see this day coming. Never, in my whole fucking life, did I think I’d fall for someone—not this hard. She was my air. Without her, I suffocated. She was what motivated me to become a better person. I did it for her. I did a lot of crazy shit for her.
Commitment was something I was terribly afraid of. After missing out on so much with my parents and after witnessing how broken they were without each other, I didn’t want to go anywhere near it. I just wanted to party, get wasted, and mess around with whomever I wanted. I didn’t want boundaries or holds put on me. I didn’t want strings or attachments. I didn’t want restrictions or anything serious. I just wanted to be me, and for a while, that’s who I was. I was me, but truthfully, I wasn’t completely happy.
With Lauren, I realized I didn’t need the parties or the drinks or the bitches (Yeah, I still needed to work on that word.) With her, I didn’t care about the boundaries or the holds. Hell, I loved them.
It was weird, but with her, I felt locked down yet free at the same time. I felt whole and real and true. Secure. There was so much I felt with her… so much I refused to miss out on. I knew there would be more to look forward too, and I also knew shit would get tough once the world realized we were official, but I wasn’t letting anything get in the way of that. The obstacles were only going to make us stronger—make me stronger.
Lauren was my woman.
She was going to be my rock—the one to hold me down.
She was going to be my first and last love.
She was going to have it all.
She was, and always would be, my everything.
And damn it, I loved the thought of that.
MONTANA
Epilogue
The tour lasted three months.
They were three long, but insanely wild, months. There were so many people. There was so much love. It was our last show, and we’d just reached our final performance. It was a bittersweet moment. These fans of ours were wild. They were like no other. It was hot and sweaty in Las Vegas but it wasn’t stopping us from rocking that stage.
I loved my band so damn much.
As I looked at each of the boys, I realized our passion had grown into something much bigger. I couldn’t quite explain it, but I knew none of us were willing to give this jig up, not even for all the money in the world. We had our music, we had each other, but most importantly, we had our lives outside of FireNine.
It was an emotional night for me, and once our performance wrapped up, I couldn’t help but smile and boast as I stumbled backstage, in desperate need to see her.
It was pretty crowded with all the bands hanging around, a few fans, and the workers. I walked back and forth, scanning the area in hopes that I’d find her. She wasn’t working this show. Shelby had taken over for her, but she promised she’d be here in time.
Time passed me by, and I realized maybe she hadn’t made it. I wanted to quit looking, but I didn’t because I knew Lauren, and I knew she wasn’t the type to break a promise. I started down the hall and stopped in front of the band’s dressing room door. I pushed it open, but it was dark inside.
No one was around. Where the hell is she?
I turned back around and marched down the hallway, spotting Deed with Megan. “Hey, man. Have you seen Lauren?”
He shook his head, his damp hair flopping. “No. Haven’t seen her all night.”
I nodded, and he walked past me, wrapping his arm around Megan’s shoulder. I swiped at my forehead, removing the nervous sweat. I had to keep my cool. I needed to relax. I turned around again and started for the dressing room, but as I got closer, a fiery redhead appeared around the corner, and when she spotted me, she grinned hard and wide.
My heart banged in my chest as her warm smile made me ooze. “Fuck,” I breathed, hurrying for her. “Where the hell have you been? I was looking all over for you.”
“I know. I’m sorry! But I have a surprise for you,” she said before kissing me.
“Yeah? What kind? One that’ll take place in the dressing room?”
She laughed, slapping my shoulder in a playful m
anner. “No, Montana. This is for real.” She clutched my hand and turned around, dragging me down the hallway and around the corner. I spotted the exit ahead, and my eyebrows stitched.
“Where are we going?”
She didn’t respond.
Instead, she hurried forward and pushed out the exit door. Squeezing my hand tighter, she rushed around the back of the stadium, and we met in the parking lot. And what I saw, I couldn’t fucking believe.
She stopped walking quickly as I stared ahead, spotting a tall white tent with lanterns lit outside of it, and hung around the tent were small decorative lights that really made it stand out. There had to be over fifty people beneath the tent. They all chatted and hooted and hollered, celebrating the night away. The atmosphere was astounding. I knew most of the guests there, but the people that stood out most were my parents who stood in the corner, waiting.
“Come on,” Lauren whispered, tugging me forward. I swallowed hard and followed her towards the tent. It was when we were beneath it that I saw the HAPPY BIRTHDAY MONTANA banner with all blue letters hung above the DJ stand. A big-ass cake was on the table in the corner, and the most insane part about the cake was it had an edible mohawk on top of it, the tips spray painted a fierce orange just like mine.
I laughed at the sight of it, and Lauren released my hand, grinning up at me. “We were setting up while the band performed,” she said. “Happy birthday, babe.” She stood on her toes to kiss my cheek, and I clutched her in my arms, turning my face to catch her lips.
“I don’t even know what to say…” I said. And really, I didn’t. I never had anything like this done for me before.
“There’s nothing to say, man.” Gage’s voice rose behind me, and I spun around, spotting him with Miss Eliza and baby Grendel, Roy and Kelsey, Deed and Megan, and Ben.
“Happy birthday!” they all shouted, tossing confetti over me.
Who I'm Becoming Page 21