Crossroads

by Skyy

  Denise laughed at the new sappy version of her friend. Cooley threw her middle finger up.

  “Where is Misha?” Cooley asked.

  “She had to get home.” Carmen sat back next to Nic. “You know she got married—straight woman curfew.”

  “Awww, I wanted to meet her so bad.” Sahara rolled her eyes.

  Cooley nudged her sarcastic girlfriend.

  “So for real, Cooley, what are you going to do now?” Farih asked.

  “I don’t know. I guess, look for another job. Bae, are you going to love me if I’m broke?” Cooley batted her long eyelashes at Sahara.

  “Don’t worry, honey, you can be my Stedman.”

  Everyone laughed; they knew Cooley could never be a kept woman.

  “You can come to New York, be my manager,” Denise added.

  “That’s a good idea.” Sahara smiled. “You can manage me too, baby.”

  “I don’t know.”

  “For real, bruh, you are a natural. Maybe you should consider it.” Denise nodded her head. The thought crossed her mind; management might not be a bad idea.

  It was four in the morning, but no one cared. The crew sat around laughing about their past experiences.

  Cooley reminisced about the first time she saw Lena, and how she thought she was going to be the one to get her first. She had to catch herself from saying too much when she noticed the uncomfortable look on Terrin’s face.

  Farih told stories about how photo shoots really went. The women listened as she explained how a sexy, beach photo might look sexy and exotic, but in actuality it was cold and uncomfortable.

  Lena noticed how Denise and Farih touched each other frequently. Even if it was in subtle way, they would find a way to touch. She didn’t want to touch Terrin like that.

  “Man, if y’all could have seen my face when Denise sent me those photos.” Cooley shook her head, remembering when Denise had sent photos.

  “I remember, she started choking and everything.” Sahara laughed. “I didn’t know what was wrong with her.”

  “I’m sorry, bruh. Didn’t mean to mess you up like that.”

  Cooley’s lip curled. “Yes, the hell you did. You knew exactly what you were doing.”

  Everyone laughed as Denise nodded in aggreance.

  Lena glanced over at Terrin, while her friends laughed and talked. Terrin sat with a goofy smile on her face. She seemed out of place. Sahara walked in the house and immediately fit in. Lena didn’t know why it was different with Terrin. Terrin didn’t seem to want to get to know her friends. She wondered if it was all because of Denise.

  Lena noticed the smiles on her friends’ faces. Carmen and Nic, Cooley and Sahara, and Denise and Farih all had the love glow, a glow she didn’t have. Thoughts ran through her mind. She wondered if she would ever have that glow with Terrin.

  The group began to disperse when they realized the sun was coming up. Sahara and Carmen talked about her singing at their wedding. Sahara and Farih exchanged numbers. Terrin stood by the door while she said her good-byes to her friends.

  Lena walked over to Denise. Denise smiled, walking toward Lena. They embraced instantly. The hug was warm. Lena didn’t want to let go.

  “So you aren’t going to forget me when you blow up as an actress, are you?”

  Denise smiled. “Now you know better. I could never forget you. And, hell, you act like we aren’t going to be talking.”

  “Are we?” Lena’s face fell.

  Denise put her hands on Lena’s shoulders. “Of course, we are, Lena. You are still one of my bestfriends, you know.”

  Lena’s face lit up. She hugged Denise again. Denise hugged her back.

  Denise felt someone looking at her. She glanced up and saw Terrin’s eyes fixated on her embrace with Lena. Denise and Lena let go of each other.

  Denise walked over to Terrin, extending her hand. “It was real nice meeting you, Terrin.”

  Terrin hesitated. “It was nice meeting you too.” She forced a smile while shaking Denise’s hand.

  Denise could feel the tension through the strong handshake. Terrin was letting her know that Lena was hers now. Denise wanted to laugh but just smiled and walked back over to Farih.

  Lena walked up to Terrin. “You ready to go?”

  Terrin tried to hide her attitude, but she knew it was obvious. She’d had enough of the Denise and Lena reunion and was ready to get the hell out of there. “Yeah, let’s go.”

  Lena frowned. She didn’t like Terrin’s anti-social attitude all night. She wanted Terrin to be more like Farih and Sahara; she was embarrassed by her attitude.

  The car ride was quiet. Lena couldn’t stop picturing her friends’ faces and the glows they possessed. Lena pulled the vanity mirror down. She looked at herself. She barely recognized the woman she had become. She was twenty, married, about to be divorced, and there was another baby growing inside of her. She tried to remember how all of this happened.

  “So my friends want to go out to eat when we get back to Memphis.” Terrin put her hand on Lena’s thigh. She couldn’t wait to get back to Memphis and be around people she wanted to be around.

  “Terrin, I can’t do this.”

  “What did you say?” Terrin asked, unable to hear Lena’s murmur.

  Lena turned her head to Terrin. “I can’t do this. I can’t.”

  Terrin’s heart skipped a beat. Lena’s words almost made her miss their turn. She pulled into the Westin and parked into the first empty spot she could find. Terrin turned the car off. Neither moved.

  “What do you mean, Lena?”

  “Terrin, I am sorry, but what we have going on is not what I really want or need right now.”

  Terrin wanted to yell. She took a series of short breaths to calm down. “It’s ’cause of her, isn’t it?” Terrin wanted to turn around and go let Denise have it.

  “No, it has nothing to do with her. But don’t think that I didn’t notice how you were acting with my friends tonight.”

  “Whatever. That’s bullshit.” Terrin opened the car door and got out. She slammed the door behind her.

  Lena was shocked. “Terrin.” Lena got out of the car, closing the door almost as hard as Terrin did.

  “Lena, I’ve done everything you asked of me. Now you come here and see her, and all of a sudden, you don’t want to be with me anymore. How am I supposed to take that?”

  “Terrin, please just listen.” Lena grabbed Terrin’s hand. She could see that Terrin was fighting to hold back tears. “Terrin, I am twenty-one years old, and I can’t think of a time that I haven’t belonged to someone else. I’ve been my parents’ child, Brandon’s girlfriend and wife. I am entering a new time in my life, and I need time to figure out who the hell I am.”

  “All I want to do is be there.”

  “Terrin, I don’t want anyone there. I have to do this on my own. I’m not ready to belong to anyone else. I don’t want to be in a relationship. Hell, I don’t know when I will be.”

  Terrin felt her body trembling. She knew Lena was right, but her heart wouldn’t let her accept it. “Lena, I can’t just be your friend.”

  Lena lowered her head. “If that’s the way you feel, then I am sorry.”

  Terrin was irritated. “So you gonna just let me go like that? You fought tooth and nail to keep that bitch in your life, but you are willing to throw me away.”

  “Why do you keep trying to put Denise in this?” Anger filled Lena’s body.

  “’Cause even if you don’t admit it, I know the fucking truth. You are still in love with her!”

  Lena took a step back. She had a familiar feeling; it was déjà vu. She remembered the fight she had with Brandon about Denise. “You know what, this is what I am talking about. All of this, I don’t want it. I’m not trying to answer to anyone. I’m only answering to myself.” Lena walked away toward the hotel entrance.

  Terrin watched the woman she loved walk away. She knew she had no one to blame but herself. She knew Lena was damaged go
ods, but she didn’t care. She knew Lena was worth it, and she wasn’t giving up without a fight.

  Terrin rushed into the hotel. “Lena, wait!” She caught up with Lena waiting for an elevator. “I’m sorry, OK. I just don’t want to lose you.”

  “I am sorry that I hurt you, Terrin. It’s not what I wanted to do. But I have to do what is best for me.”

  “So this is it?”

  “I still want you as a friend. I don’t want to lose you in my life.”

  The elevator door opened. They got off on their floor. They walked in silence to the beautiful hotel suite Terrin had rented in hopes of them having a romantic evening together.

  “How about we just go in and sleep on it?” Terrin pleaded. She hoped that a night of mind-blowing sex would bring Lena back to her.

  Lena stood with the same blank expression. “I think I’m going to go stay at my parents’ house. If it’s OK with you, I think I’ll stay in Atlanta for a while.”

  Terrin knew her decision wasn’t going to make a bit of difference. Suddenly Lena didn’t look as beautiful to her anymore. Instead of the sexy, intelligent woman she fell in love with, Lena just looked like another bitch that was breaking her heart.

  Terrin swung the door open, causing it to hit the wall behind her.

  Lena jumped; she had never seen Terrin so angry.

  Terrin grabbed Lena’s Louis Vuitton duffle bag, throwing the few things of Lena’s laying on the bed in the bag.

  “What are you doing?” Lena walked into the room.

  Terrin closed her duffle bag. She peered at Lena with pure anger in her eyes. She walked past Lena and threw her bag out in the hotel hallway. “You want to go, then go. I’m not about to sit here and work my ass off for a woman who obviously can’t make her mind up about anything.”

  “Are you fucking kidding me?” Lena looked at Terrin standing against the door, waiting on her to leave. “You are not really acting like this.”

  “Please, Lena what do you expect? I should have known better than to get involved with you. But, like a fool, I fell for your ass. Now I see why Denise wasn’t willing to continue these games with you.”

  The words slapped Lena against her face. Terrin was right. She had done the same thing to Denise, and that was why she wasn’t with her now. Lena didn’t have a leg to stand on. Terrin had good reason to do what she was doing.

  Lena lowered her head and walked to the door. She stood in front of Terrin. “I just want you to know that I really do care about you a lot. And I’m sorry for hurting you. You are right, and I know it. I hope one day we can be friends, ’cause I do value your friendship.”

  Terrin wanted to stay mad, but she couldn’t. Lena had her heart. She felt like someone was pulling both of her arms in different directions. One, to close the door forever, the other, wanting to hold Lena in her arms.

  “I’m sorry too. Just give me some time. Do you need a ride to your parents’?”

  “No, I’ll catch a cab.”

  Lena waited for her cab to arrive. She stood outside. The early morning Atlanta air was cool for a summer day. Her hair began to blow as an unusual breeze swept past her. Standing in the city she had lived in her whole life, she knew a new chapter was about to begin. Not as her parents’ daughter, Brandon’s wife, or Denise’s lover, but simply as Lena.

  About the Author

  Skyy is a 27-year-old author, screenwriter, and playwright and self-proclaimed weirdo from Memphis, TN. Her first novel, Choices was originally released in 2007 and quickly gained popularity both within the gay and lesbian community and within the urban fiction community. In Skyy’s spare time she enjoys traveling, watching and spending a crazy amount of money on DVDs, and chatting with fans on online.

  Contact Skyy

  www.simplyskyy.com

  skyy@simplyskyy.com

  www.facebook.com/simplyskyy

  www.twitter.com/simplyskyy

  Urban Books, LLC

  78 East Industry Court

  Deer Park, NY 11729

  Crossroads Copyright © 2012 Skyy

  All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced in any form or by any means without prior consent of the Publisher, except brief quotes used in reviews.

  ISBN: 978-1-5998-3255-5

  Distributed by Kensington Publishing Corp.

  Submit Wholesale Orders to:

  Kensington Publishing Corp.

  C/O Penguin Group (USA) Inc.

  Attention: Order Processing

  405 Murray Hill Parkway

  East Rutherford, NJ 07073-2316

  Phone: 1-800-526-0275

  Fax: 1-800-227-9604