by Kahlen Aymes
“Ask yourself something Clinton, do you blame her?”
“No, I don’t blame her. I blame myself, I wish I never played the stupid games the other guys did. If would have minded my business, focused on school instead of the popularity. Lindy wouldn’t have had to endure the drama and maybe she would still be my girlfriend.”
“Then there is only one thing you need to do.”
“What’s that?”
“There’s an old saying if you love something set it free. If it comes back to you, it's meant to be. I’m not saying you love Lindy but I can see you care about her. Maybe you should let her go, in the sense you use this time to become the man you wish you had been all along.”
“So, pretend that I have no feelings for her and hope that one day she’ll decide that I’m worth whatever trouble comes with knowing me.”
“Well, I wasn’t saying that in that context but yes. If she’s this person you’ve torn yourself up inside and out for, someone you’ve skipped school for, I think you won’t have to wait. She’ll come to you.”
“I hope you’re right, Mom.”
“You know, I was her age once and it wasn’t until I was in college when I encountered someone worse than you. I mean someone who may or may not have done those things people said about him.”
“So what happened with him?”
“Well, he met a nice girl and did a complete one hundred and eighty degree turnabout. He paid attention in classes, focused on his career path and by the time it was all said and done he had a degree, graduated with high honors and got the girl.”
“So it can happen .”
“It can, you know one day you should ask your Dad what he saw in me to turn his whole life and reputation around.” Mom smiled and gave me a wink before heading back downstairs to the basement.
If my dad could change the way everyone perceived him to be and still got the girl. I knew I could, well I hoped that I could.
Chapter Seven
Clinton
The next morning I had a note for my abrupt departure from school yesterday, the office gave me attitude about not checking in before leaving but I explained that I had been in a lot of pain and needed to get out of there. After a quick call to my mom, I had a pass in my hand on my way to my first class.
I was courteous and polite to everyone I saw, I didn’t engage in more than a few hellos and could already tell the difference in the way others regarded me. I saw Lindy around more than I normally had, it was like fate’s giant test to see if I could contain myself and I could report I almost lost it once but held it together.
Even though I didn’t see it happening, I could feel Lindy’s glance. Maybe I was imagining things but I wanted to believe in those moments where I got a feeling she was looking right at me. It would cause me to smile out of hope.
By last period, I realized I could do this. There were only a few weeks left, and then the weekends. I only had to see her during lunch periods and one class. I could do this, I hoped it wasn’t for nothing.
When the bell rung I headed out to my car, the lot there were people standing around talking. I kept my eyes on the prize. Even though Lindy’s blue car was to my right, I would keep walking straight to my car and get into it to leave. So I walked with purpose to the car, several byes along the way but no one tried to stop me for conversation, thank goodness.
Day one in the record books.
For every day after that, I remained vigilant in my pursuit of the bigger picture. Shelly stopped me a week after I began my new plan and asked me if I had given up on Lindy. When I asked her why she wanted to know she confessed that Lindy wasn’t taking it well and I explained to her that the ball was in her court. Shelly threw her hands in the air and asked if I thought about taking Lindy to the prom. When I told her I may not even go she punched me in the arm, twice.
“Don’t you know every girl needs a prom moment? Where the guy goes out of his way and makes the ultimate romantic gesture. This could make or break your potential relationship, you understand this, don’t you?”
“Shelly, listen when I tell you I want nothing more than to do all of this for her. She was the one who told me she didn’t want the drama that came with dating me. I didn’t blame her and I gave her space. I don’t want to go to prom because the only reason I would want to be there would be for her.”
“At least come, show all these stupid idiots that no matter what they throw at you, it won’t change how you feel about her.”
“Shelly, I can’t.”
“I never pictured you for a quitter, Clinton Delaney.”
“Well, I never thought the first time I threw my heart behind someone I would have to deal with the shit I’ve had to or better she would get hurt because of me.”
“That will not happen again, Clinton.”
“You don’t know for sure, Shelly.”
“I would whoop and ass if anyone tried it.”
“That right there is why I can’t be with Lindy right now.”
“Don’t be a pussy, Delaney.”
“I’m not being a pussy, Shelly. I’m being realistic, you’ve seen her hand right? You’ve heard the shit Alexis’ friends have said about her even now. I don’t want her to have to dwell on this, I want her happy. Like we were...”
“Like you were what?”
“Nevermind, I have to go. Please don’t push this issue anymore.”
Then I left, I felt like an asshole but it all seemed to click at once. I wanted her to know how serious I was and a plan began to form in my head. I needed Lindy to know no matter what, even if she never realizes that she wants to be with me. She will know beyond a shadow of a doubt I cared about her and I listened to everything she ever said. I needed her to understand how important she is.
My first stop was to my dad, even though my request took him by surprise he humored me and helped me figure out what to do next. He even made a few calls to the people I would need to plead my case too. I hoped that they went along with it.
As the days at school dwindled, prom was on the horizon. Lindy was now wearing a brace on her hand instead of that dreaded cast, I felt a little more at ease now. When I received my prom ticket, I was both elated and saddened, happy because I knew Lindy would have a good time and saddened that it was one of the last events we’d have together. It made me even that more defiant in not going.
On the last day of school, I took one last look around campus, I said goodbye and thanked several teachers and coaches before I left the building for the last time. Before I walked out of the halls for good I stopped by the cafeteria, I had to take one last look at the spot I stood in when I came face to face with the girl who is the first one to ever capture my heart.
Smiling to myself I left out of the building and headed down to my car, as I approached I noticed there was something laying against the windshield. The closer I got, the more my heart pounded against my chest. Laying there on my car was part of the weeping willow tree Lindy had shown me and told me about.
That was when I knew I still had a chance.
I drove home with a renewed vigor and an overwhelming excitement to check on the progress of my requests. I think some of the people down at City Hall may think I’m off my rocker but with the support of both of my parents behind me. I gave the best presentation and sold the whole city on my idea. With the promise to replace everything I was taking and my dad’s suggestion to sweeten the pot, I knew I did something amazing.
When I made it home that day, my mom greeted me at the door wearing a look on her face I couldn’t read. I looked closer at her, she was holding a paper in her hand I wasn’t sure what it was but she didn’t look happy.
“Is everything okay?”
“You got a letter from City Hall today.” The look on her face made my heart sink.
“They said no,” I said and she shook her head.
“No Clinton, they said yes. They approved everything and are ready proceed whenever you’ve gotten everything in place.”
Grabbing the letter out of her hands, I read it. I read the glowing letter and comments from the board members. Now all I had to do is contact Mr. Flannery and pray that all the hard work I had gone through will be something he can also stand behind.
“I’m going to need a tux.”
“A tux, why do you need a tux?”
“I need the tux to woo the girl of my dreams.”
Mom excited at my admission, promising me that by tomorrow I would have a tux. I even sent Shelly a text asking what color Lindy would wear to prom she sent back the most cryptic response.
‘Cinderella’s ball gown is fitting for the ball’
“Hey, Mom?” I yelled out.
“Yeah?”
“What does ‘Cinderella’s ball gown is fitting for the ball’ mean?”
“In what context?”
“I asked Shelly what color Lindy would be wear to prom and that’s what she sent back.”
“Oh, then that’s simple. Cinderella’s ball gown was a light blue.”
“Then I’m gonna need light blue.”
True to her word, she had a tux for me the next day with a blue tie and cummerbund. She even told me she ordered me a corsage and a matching flower for me.
On the day of prom I was nervous to the point where I thought I would lose all the food I’d eaten in the past eighteen years. I was worried about everything I would do, I would show up at the Flannery’s after Lindy left for the prom. I would go to Mr. Flannery and explain my plan to him and hope that he says yes.
I knew he heard about the worst and I hope he wouldn’t deter me from the bigger picture. I wanted him to see my vision, I wanted to make sure that Lindy didn’t have to worry and she would always know where she belonged.
I parked my car up the road from the Flannery’s house, I still felt guilty about how I found out where they lived. I didn’t mean to follow Lindy home but I saw her car three cars ahead of me and my body just moved of its own volition. When the limo pulled up and people piled out, I felt a sharp pang in my chest knowing this should be me. I should be the one picking her up and getting all those smiles and her excitement first hand.
When she stepped outside to greet her friends, it took everything in me to stay in the car and not run to her. She looked even more beautiful in blue, she looked like everything I imagined. I watched in envy as picture after picture of the group being taken, the hug with her Dad before she left. That last glance up at the sky, her little homage to her mom who I knew was looking down and smiling upon her.
I waited until the limo was out of sight before I started my car and parked in the Flannery’s drive. I got out and climbed the stairs before ringing the doorbell. When the door opened, I could tell that Mr. Flannery had been crying. He still gave me a polite smile before telling me I had just missed Lindy and the others. When I explained to him I wanted to talk to him, he invited me in and let me speak.
That was when I poured my heart out again.
Then, he told me yes.
Leaving the Flannery’s house I had a renewed sense of purpose, I knew what I had to do next. I drove straight to the hotel that was holding the prom. By the time I got to the place it was already in full swing, I held Lindy’s corsage in my hand as I walked through the throngs of people toward my target. Seeing Lindy a block and a half way from a car took my breath away but Lindy standing ten feet away from me made my heart thud to a halt before picking up and beating fast.
She was laughing with her friends and a few guys I’d seen before, as I continued to stare at her from the spot I stood in one of them noticed me. I watched as Shelly looked up and saw me, she reached over and tapped Lindy on the shoulder when she looked up and over at me, I watched as her eyes widened and her mouth opened.
I took this as my opportunity, I walked and stood before her. While her friends parted ways to give us a chance to talk, I couldn’t help but take her all in.
“Hello, Lindy,” I said.
“Hello, Clinton.”
“You look beautiful.”
“Thank you, you... you look very handsome.”
“Thanks,” I said before I began again. “Look, I’m not your date but I bought you a corsage.” I held the clear plastic box up to her.
“Oh, I don’t have a date.” She said and I smiled, opening the box for her.
“May I?” She nodded as I slipped the elastic band over her hand and onto her wrist. “These are delphinium."
“It’s beautiful, thank you.”
“You’re welcome.”
Lindy and I stood together for the longest time before a slow song began and I got up the nerve to ask her that one important question, the only reason I came there.
“Would you like to dance with me?” I asked but in my heart, it felt more like a beg.
“Yes, I would like that very much.”
I held my hand out for her to take before leading her out to the dance floor. We danced together for over four glorious minutes, the whole time we danced I focused on her face. I stared into her eyes and watched her blush over and over. When the song ended and a faster one began I led her off the dance floor towards a side door.
Ready to make my escape, I needed to say one last thing to her before I left.
“I needed to talk to you and I hope you’ll listen.”
“Okay.”
“Lindy, I like you a lot. I like you more than I’ve liked anyone or anything. Well not anyone, I like my family but outside of that, I like you. I know you have a lot of stuff to work out in your head and I will give you time to figure it out. I wanted you to know, no matter how long it takes if you feel the same way about me as I do about you I will be waiting.”
“Clinton...I...”
“No, I needed to say these things so you know how serious that I am about you.”
“Hey guys, can I get your picture?” Shelly called out and we both turned.
She stood there with a camera in her hand tapping her foot. Lindy nodded and I followed suit. I held her to my side as we both smiled for Shelly. Her camera flash went off multiple times before she thanked us. When she was gone, I knew it was time to go.
Leaning down I placed a kiss on Lindy’s cheek before I could pull back and standup she wrapped her arms around me and hugged me. As I hugged her back, I hoped that what I did next didn’t upset her any more than had already happened.
“I have to go,” I whispered in her ear and her arms loosened before dropping away. I took a step back just so I could see her face.
The hurt showed all over her face but I had to do what I had to do, I turned around and headed straight out the door towards the parking lot never looking back.
Chapter Eight
Clinton
The night of prom I dodged texts and phone calls from almost everyone who witnessed my abrupt disappearance from the hotel. The only ones I read were from Shelly, she went on and on about how she hated me and that I was scum. She also said I might want to wear a cup because she didn’t care and I needed a kick in the dick.
She wasn’t wrong.
I knew my leaving the way I did would be a dick move but I needed Lindy to see I was serious and there would be no second-guessing whether I was serious about her. Leaving everything in her hands is where I needed things to be.
It’s been four days and nothing. Although I had still kept the plans in motion, I wouldn’t deviate from the task at hand. Either way, I wanted Lindy to have this if she wanted to be with me or didn’t. She needed this now and for the future, I knew I was making the right decision.
On graduation morning while Lindy left early to go to the arena with Shelly and the others who volunteered to make sure that everything was ready for the three o’clock ceremony. I was at the park watching my plans come to fruition. The team that my parents had hired for me had spent the better part of the morning digging up the willow tree and removing the bench that meant so much to Lindy.
When I broached the subject with Lindy’s dad, he was emotiona
l. I could see that even though it had been eighteen years since he lost Larissa, the pain was just as strong as if it had happened yesterday. We had decided together on the spot to place it at in the backyard, a place where Lindy loved to sit and where the tree would always remain safe.
The tree company and I showed up at the Flannery house at ten minutes to noon, Thomas came outside to greet me as the truck backed up further into the yard.
“You know, the day she came home and told me about you was the first time I acknowledged that my little girl was growing up. I know things will not be easy and I take a lot of responsibility for that because of how I handled things. I stayed in a Larissa bubble all these years. However, I wanted to thank you for not giving up on her. I think if her mom could see this, she’d feel the same way I do. If you stick this out, you will make my daughter as happy as I was with her mother.”
“Thank you sir, I hope so too.”
“Get home, I’ll supervise this.”
“Thank you and thank you for the opportunity to do this for her.”
“No need to thank me, son. Thank you for putting that smile back on my little girl.”
I looked at the tree as a crane lifted it and placed into the hole in their backyard, Thomas walked towards the workers while I went towards my car. I needed to shower and get changed so I could make it to the arena by two.
When I arrived at the arena the nerves had already set in, we’d had our assignments when we checked in and which places we needed to line up so we’d be able to enter the seating area. As they went over the order again, I glanced behind me to see Lindy standing there staring at me. I smiled at her before I turned back around before I left then to go the dressing room to put my cap and gown on.
As the vice-principal called our names, I laughed as everything hit me. I could have either made the biggest mistake of my life or the best decision. As we marched into the arena to the claps and cheers of our parents and peers, the nervousness dissipated and I was ready to get it over with.