She lifted her hips again, and he groaned as she fell and rose on his cock once more, drawing him deeper into her. He had wanted to take his time, but when she wrapped her legs around his back and arched against him, he knew he was lost. He couldn’t stop himself from moving faster, harder, deeper until all he could feel was her pliant body against his and her tight muscles squeezing his cock.
Kadence’s hands gripped his hard ass as she held him closer to her. “Please,” she panted as the tension coiling higher in her body felt ready to unravel.
She was close to orgasm; he could sense it in her rapid pulse and the demanding movements of her body beneath his. “Please what?” he asked as he nipped at her ear.
“I… I don’t know.”
He would have laughed at her words, if they hadn’t unleashed something primitive within him, something he’d never experienced before. She was his, and only his. She may not know what she wanted, but he did, and he would give her the answer. He would be the only one to ever ease her in such a way.
Driving deeper into her, he reached between them to rub his finger against her clit until she was writhing and her body was moving wantonly beneath his. Her head fell back as she arched off the bed.
“Ronan!”
The cry erupted from her as waves of pleasure crashed through her, causing her whole body to shake. She could only cling to him as she completely unraveled. She had never felt anything like this, never thought to experience such bliss.
With a shout, he plunged into her a final time and the clenching muscles of her sheath milked his release from him. Tremors shook him as he continued to come inside her in a seemingly endless stream. Finally spent, his head fell to her shoulder and he remained buried within her as he rolled to the side with her trapped in his arms.
He savored the astonishing feelings she evoked in him. Most of them were feelings he was experiencing for the first time. He’d never felt so protective of another before, never wanted to cherish and hold someone as close as he held her.
He inhaled her sweet scent, pleased to realize he could smell himself all over her too. Others would smell him on her skin and within her as well. Her hands released their death grip on his shoulders, and she trailed her fingers leisurely up his back.
He inhaled again, drawing her essence deeper into him. Then, the scent changed. In an instant, all he could smell was her sweet blood pounding through her veins. And he wanted to have his blood coursing as strongly within her as her own. He also wanted to feel her flowing through him to form an unbreakable connection to her.
Without warning, the demon part of him rushed to the forefront.
Chapter Twenty-Five
His fangs lengthened against her skin as his instincts screamed at him to drain her blood and replace it with his own. To make it so they would be bound for eternity and she would never be able to walk away from here or return to her family. His fangs grazed her neck. The vein pulsing beneath her flesh was right there; he could pierce it before she ever knew what he intended.
He’d have her drained to the point of death within a minute and his own blood filling her in the next minute.
She’ll hate you for an eternity if you cage her against her will and in such a way! A small sliver of reason pierced through his bloodlust.
Pulling himself out of her, he flung himself back so fast that he nearly toppled off the bed.
“Ronan, are you okay?”
Her hand rubbed his back. His control unraveled further at her touch. “Don’t!” he snarled.
Kadence recoiled as if she’d been slapped. She had no idea what was wrong with him, but she suspected it had something to do with what had just transpired between them. Had she done something wrong?
Well, if she had, then it was his fault, she decided. He had a lot more experience in this than she did after all.
What if they had both done something wrong? He may have a lot more experience in this area than her, but she could guarantee he’d never been with a hunter before. Maybe their kinds were never supposed to come together in such a way and now something was happening to him because of it.
She pulled the blanket up against her chest as he launched to his feet and stalked away from her. He didn’t look at her as he prowled the room.
“Did we do something wrong?” she asked. “Is this because I’m a hunter and you’re a vampire?”
He gave a bitter laugh as realization settled over him and he lifted his head to find her blue eyes locked on him. Something had gone completely off the tracks wrong, but not because of what she was. It was because of who she was to him. He was a train wreck waiting to happen because she was not simply a woman he’d come to care for, not a hunter, but his mate.
Fuck! He tugged at his hair, trying to keep himself calm as the realization rocked him. How had he not seen it earlier?
Then, Declan’s words replayed in his head, “You say that because she is here now, but we both know you’re lying. You would have kept her.”
Wouldn’t he have let her go? He’d been determined to do so; he still was. It didn’t matter she was his mate, didn’t matter he’d accelerated the need to complete the mating bond by taking her, he would not chain her as she’d been chained her whole life, and he would not chain her to his world. The danger of her life as a hunter was a day at the circus compared to what came with his life.
The constant fights and death that made up every day of his existence. The treacherous edge he walked. She would be the first one he killed if he turned Savage. Or she could calm the demon within him and make it so he never again walked the line between the darkness and the light. It was what mates did for a vampire after all, especially a purebred vampire.
But no other vampire like him had ever existed before. It could be possible he was so completely bound to the demon part of him that she wouldn’t calm him, that nothing would change within him, and he would be pushed over the edge by that realization.
Who are you trying to convince of that? He wondered, knowing it was a lie even as he thought it. She’d already calmed him in so many ways. Declan had said that when he first held her, his eyes had been entirely brown again. In that instant, she’d brought forth something in him that hadn’t been there in centuries. If she was his, he knew, his constant drive to deliver death would not plague him so badly.
But with the bond not completed between them, she’d also made him far more explosive in other ways. He now understood why his temper had been more unstable lately, why he could barely control himself around her when no other female had ever made him lose control before. A vampire who encountered their mate was more volatile until the bond between the mates was completed.
However, if she were bonded to him, she may never be able to live out her dreams. He could guarantee her nothing but fighting and uncertainty in his foreseeable future, maybe forever.
She deserved better, and he would make sure she had it.
“No, Kadence, this is not because you’re a hunter and I’m a vampire. We did nothing wrong.”
“Then what is the matter with you?” Her eyes narrowed on him and she pulled the covers more firmly against her chest. “Or is this how you treat all women after you have sex with them?”
He closed his eyes against the misery in her voice. He was a bastard. He should be in that bed now, holding her close. Instead, he was scared if he got too close to her, he might drain her dry, change her, and never let her go.
“No, this is not the way I treat women after sex.”
“I guess I’m the lucky one then.” Her tone dripped acid as she spoke.
“No… This isn’t you.”
Taking a deep breath, he braced himself to meet her gaze again. She stared back at him, her eyes glittering with fury, but also with a hurt he’d never wanted to inflict on her. Her anguish shoved the demon within him aside. He took a step toward her, and when the thirst for her blood didn’t immediately rush back to the surface, he closed the distance between them.
Her hai
r fell into one of her eyes when she tilted her head back to stare at him. He brushed the strand aside to tuck it behind her ear. Maybe he could control himself enough to crawl back into the bed with her and hold her the way she deserved to be held.
He stroked his hand over her cheek and lower to her neck. His gaze fastened on the vein running just under her skin. He dropped his hand and stepped back as his veins became as scorched as a desert.
“I can’t.”
He moved further away as he closed his eyes against the hunger tearing at him. Lifting his hands, he scrubbed his palms over his cheeks, pulling at his flesh.
Kadence had never seen anyone look so distraught before. She didn’t understand what was going on with him, but the fact it was Ronan tore at her heart. “Maybe I can help.”
Oh, she could help, he ruminated bitterly. She was the only one who could help. Lowering his hands from his face, he lifted his eyes to hers.
Kadence’s mouth parted on a breathless oh when Ronan met her gaze again. His eyes were a glittering ruby color that blazed out at her and his fangs had elongated past his lower lip. She’d seen his fangs and red eyes before, but this was somehow different.
Because he’s not in control, she realized and her heart leapt into her throat. Before, she’d always been able to see Ronan behind the vampire traits. Now, she saw only the demon.
This was what Joseph had looked like before he’d bit her. There had been no humanity in his gaze, nothing other than evil. Her hand involuntarily went to the place on her neck where Joseph had sank his fangs. The memory of the pain he’d inflicted on her came readily back to life.
“I scare you,” he said.
Kadence closed her eyes against her self-disgust over her cowardice. “No,” she lied.
“I can smell the fear on you.”
“Not of you, not really. The bite, it’s painful.”
Refusing to be cowed by the memory of Joseph, she opened her eyes. Her heart sank when she realized Ronan was gone.
Ronan stormed down the stairs, heedless of his nudity. He moved swiftly across the marble foyer, not noticing the coldness of it beneath his bare feet as he made his way to the basement door, flung it open, and swiftly descended.
He stepped off the last stair and strode across the matted floor of the gym. He would head straight for one of the treadmills as soon as he fed. He’d run his body for so long and hard that he would be too tired to move, too tired to do anything but crawl into bed and pass out. He would be too tired to think about anything, especially her. Though, he suspected he’d have to be dead before he stopped thinking of Kadence.
“Some of us prefer clothes to work out in, but to each their own.”
Ronan ground his teeth together as the words drifted across the room from the stairwell he’d left behind. The last thing, the last one, he wanted to deal with right now was Declan. Ronan refused to look back at him as continued through the set of swinging steel doors and into the storage room beyond. A tall, stainless steel refrigerator was set against the far wall. They kept emergency supplies of blood stashed inside, and with the way he felt right now, this definitely classified as an emergency.
Pulling one of the doors open, he snatched a blood bag from within. He ripped the top off it, and heedless of the cold temperature, downed the contents in one gulp. He crumpled the bag, tossed it aside, and grabbed another one. He drank it down before flinging it aside.
He had never required a third bag to sate his thirst before, but fire still raged through his veins. Seizing another bag, he consumed it and was reaching for a fourth when the doors swung open behind him. Declan’s footsteps sounded on the tile floor as he entered the room.
“Get out,” Ronan commanded.
He still wouldn’t look at Declan as he ripped the top off the fourth bag and drank it. The hunger continued to shred his insides with its incessant demand for more. For something other than this bagged shit, or rather, someone else. No matter how much he drank, he wouldn’t be satisfied until it was Kadence’s vein his lips were pressed against.
Throwing the bag away, he cursed loudly before slamming his fist into the fridge. Metal screeched as it crumpled from the impact of the blow.
“What did the fridge ever do to you?” Declan quipped.
Ronan whirled on him. “I said get out!”
Declan held his hands up as he backed away. Ronan barely glanced at whatever was hanging from Declan’s fingers before his friend tossed it at him. “Easy, Ronan, I’m not here to start anything with you.”
“Then why are you here?”
Declan’s nostrils flared as he scented the air. Ronan stiffened when he realized Declan had caught his scent, which meant he could smell what had transpired between him and Kadence.
“You’re in a feeding frenzy,” Declan said flatly, wisely choosing not to comment on his relationship with Kadence.
“Your powers of observation are astronomical!” Ronan spat.
“When was the last time you fed?”
“What business is that of yours?”
“You’re out of control. That makes it my business. If this were me in here, you would lock me away or destroy me.”
“Try it,” Ronan dared him.
“I’m not going to try anything. We both know you could kill me, just as we both know why you’re like this.”
Ronan turned away from him and removed another bag of blood. This time, he didn’t bother to tear off the top but sank his fangs into the bottom and drained the contents. He would drink every drop of blood in the fridge, and when he was done, he would return upstairs, take her again and drain her.
He stretched a shaky hand in for the sixth bag. In all his years, he’d never been this out of control.
Chapter Twenty-Six
“When was the last time you fed?” Declan asked again.
“Two days ago.” He occasionally went two days at a time, never longer. When he’d been younger, he’d been able to go for almost a week without much of a problem. Now, he tried to feed every day to keep the part of him that craved blood and death at bay.
“You slept with her,” Declan stated.
Ronan’s head swiveled on his shoulders toward Declan. His friend edged back until his heel connected with one of the swinging doors. “That’s none of your fucking business.”
“I know, I know,” Declan said quickly. “But come on, Ronan, you must realize what she is to you.”
“I do,” Ronan admitted.
“What happened between you tonight has accelerated things for you. That is why you’re so out of control right now.”
“A hunter for a mate. How is this possible?”
“We don’t pick our mates. A lot of us don’t find them. But when we do—”
“I am well aware of what happens when we do.” A loss of control until the bond between them was completed, and since she was mortal, Kadence would also have to be turned. Which meant she would have to die.
“Then you know what must happen now,” Declan said.
Ronan closed his eyes and rubbed at the bridge of his nose. “Even if she would agree to such a thing, I would never allow it. She deserves better than this brutal existence.”
“She’s a hunter who lost her father to a Savage. She may have led a life of seclusion, but she is no innocent to the brutality of our world, or her own.”
“I promised her freedom, and she will have it,” he said hoarsely.
Declan exhaled sharply. “You know what will happen if she leaves here, leaves you.”
“I will not chain her to me! What was it you said to me? ‘Everyone deserves a chance to fly.’ You wouldn’t clip her wings, yet you expect me to do it. It will not happen.”
Declan looked at him as if he’d lost his mind, and perhaps he had.
“It already has happened, Ronan. The more you fight it, the worse it’s going to get, until you lose all control and turn Savage, or you end up forcing the change on her. If you take her by force, you may kill her, and you will kil
l the trust she has in you. You won’t be able to live with yourself if you do that to her.”
Ronan’s skin felt as if it were drawing taut against him, strangling him. He resisted the urge to dig his fingers in and shred the skin from his body so he could breathe again.
“I’ve promised her the world she dreams of, and she will be leaving in mere hours. I won’t be able to hurt her, because she won’t be here. I’ll make sure Marta and Baldric know not to tell me where they are so I can’t go after her. She’ll be set free to live, instead of caged here.”
Declan gawked at him. “That’s not an option for you.”
“It is an option for me! I know what they say about mates going crazy without each other, I’ve witnessed it, but that doesn’t mean it will happen to me. The bond is not completed between us. We have not shared blood. If anyone can control this, I can.”
“You may be the strongest and oldest vampire to ever walk this earth, but not even you can control this. You’re already losing control. No one has ever come back after they’ve given into their Savage nature. She may not even be able to bring you back if you cross that line, and if you did encounter her again as a Savage, there is no telling what you would do to her.”
Declan gestured at the bags of blood scattered across the ground at Ronan’s feet. “If you become Savage, we won’t be able to stop you. Everything you’ve worked for will be for naught. The Savages will eventually win because, if you don’t take your own life, you will take all of ours. You will most likely rise up to become their leader and there will be no stopping that, Ronan. Are you ready to deal with that?”
“I have dealt with it for centuries. You felt it necessary to make a point about the color of my eyes before, so it is no secret to you that I’ve been battling bloodlust for centuries. It will be worse when she goes, but I will control it just as I always have.”
“You just drank six bags of blood, yet I can still feel the hunger coming off you. You’ve never had to deal with finding your mate before.”
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