by S. J. Bishop
Gwen took a deep breath. “You’re right,” she said after a moment. “It’s not about Solano. But we’re in Beneventos right now – this restaurant is Mafia owned, and half of these people are members of Cuban or Italian organized crime syndicates. How many of them have killed people?”
“This is my brother’s funeral,” I said, barely whispering. “There has got to be a better time and place to rehash old arguments. Gwen, listen…”
4
Gwen
I didn’t feel like listening, honestly. But as Law tried to defend himself and justify his relationship with his family members, I knew my anger in Law was misplaced – I was upset about losing Mia and upset about what her death would mean for my life. I was about to become a single mother.
I looked over at the bar, where Val Solano was throwing back shots. Val’s presence had reminded me of some of idiotic decisions Mia had made in her life that were now going to directly impact Nikki and Law, decisions that I was now going to have to deal with…
“…these things aren’t black and white, Gwen. Can you honestly tell me that Arthur was ever bad to you? He was really hurt when you just up and left, and he still doesn’t know why. I haven’t told him…”
I took a deep breath. I’d heard this speech before. It was the same one that Law had given me the night we’d broken up. Only now, he wasn’t shouting it at me; he sounded like he was imploring me. I took a deep breath.
“Law, what do you want from me?”
Val Solano had just put back his fifth shot and was beginning to look unsteady on his feet. He looked like he was going to fall off of his chair, but he grabbed the bar just in time.
“I’m sorry,” I said, realizing that Law had replied and was waiting for my answer. “What did you say?”
Law frowned at me and shook his head. “You know what, Gwen? Never mind. I’ll see you at the lawyer’s tomorrow.” And with that, he strode across the room toward a group of his teammates.
I wasn’t expecting the anxiety that spiked the moment he moved away. His presence had been steadying me, and now, with him gone, my chest squeezed with an acute pain that demanded I rush over and say something, anything, to get him back. I ignored it, just like I had six years ago. The head and the heart don’t always agree. I’d watched my mother follow her heart over her head, and I’d watched Mia do the same. I knew better. There was right, and there was wrong. There was no room in this life for gray spaces.
I took a deep breath and tried to steady myself. Maybe it was time to go home.
“Hey, Gwen. I’m not sure if you remember me…”
I turned as someone approached me on the right. Ryan Mcloughlin had been lean in college. Now, he had about fifty pounds more muscle on him and looked as if he’d strolled casually off of the pages of Men’s Health and Fitness. The few times I’d gone to Michigan to visit Law in college, I’d been forced to spend a few evenings with Ryan. I hadn’t been a huge fan. He’d been a senior when Law was a sophomore. There was a party in Law’s apartment one night, and I’d walked into Law’s room to find Mac and some hot red-head in bed together.
“Ah,” said Mac, grinning broadly, “I see you do remember me…”
“If I want another drink, I’ll have another goddamn drink!” All eyes turned toward the bar, where Solano was waving his shot glass at the bartenders. A few younger Julianos stepped forward.
“Shit,” I breathed.
“What’s wrong?” asked Mac, but I could only watch in horror as Solano continued to bang his shot glass on the bar. The glass shattered.
The Julianos began to converge, but before they could reach Val, Law was there, putting a hand on Val’s back and shoulder and waving two fingers at the bartender. The room seemed to hold its collective breath as the bartender eyed both men warily before pouring out another two shots.
“To Mia,” I heard Law say loudly, gesturing to the room around him.
“Well, shit,” said Mac. I had to agree. Law hated being the center of attention, now all eyes were on him. The room echoed his sentiment. I raised my own glass of ginger ale and watched as Law and Val put back the shots. Law kept his hand on Val’s back and leaned down to say something to him. Val swayed on his chair and then responded…
“You all right?” Mac asked, putting a steadying hand on my elbow. No. I was not all right. Was Val talking about Mia? What was Val saying to Law?! My heart hammered in my chest. Please, Val, just keep your drunken mouth shut!
“Do you want to go outside for some air?” Mac was being incredible solicitous. I watched as Law seemed to suggest the same thing to Val because the two got up and headed toward the door together. I needed to know what they were saying.
“Yes,” I said and let Mac lead me outside.
When we got to the door, Law was putting Val Solano into a cab. He stood there a moment, watching the car drive off and looking perplexed. What had Val said to him?
“Well done, man,” said Mac, catching Law’s attention. Law glanced over, his eyes fastening on me, his expression unreadable. I realized I was close to shaking. I’d never felt this out of sorts before. Mia, Eric, Law, Val… it was all too much for me. I wanted to get out of here. I wanted to wake up and call my sister in a panic because I’d had this terrible dream…
“Hey, are you all right?” Law stepped forward, and I realized that I was all but quivering beneath Ryan’s hands.
“I’m…” But I couldn’t finish the sentence. Emotions swelled up and blocked my throat, so strong I could barely contain them.
“Gwen.” My name on his lips was my undoing; I opened my mouth, and a sob came out.
Law was there instantly, taking Mac’s place, wrapping his arms around me. I collapsed against his chest, and I began to cry in earnest. I sobbed so hard I shook with it. God! Mia!
I pressed my face into his jacket and tried to calm down, but I couldn’t. I tried to pull away so my nose wouldn’t run all over him, but he didn’t seem to care. His arms were so strong, his grip so vital and so secure, that I just clung there, sobbing.
“Shhh.” Law rubbed my back. “Gwen,” he said. “Can I get you out of here?”
I nodded.
“Do you want me to take you back to your mother’s house?” Oh god, no. Not there. I couldn’t go back and watch my mother take another pill or yell “Why me, God?” one more time.
“There’s a hotel not far from here,” said Law. “It has a small bar at the bottom that’ll be empty this time of day. Do you want to go there?”
I nodded.
5
Law
Yes, she was sobbing and pretty damn vulnerable, and yes, I felt like a real dick for even considering what I was about to do. But I refused to feel guilty. I knew I wasn’t imagining the moment we’d had in the restaurant before my grandmother had interrupted. We both needed comfort – and I’d always found that talking wasn’t all that effective at purging emotions. Fucking, on the other hand…
I saw Mac raise his brows in surprise. He knew the hotel I was talking about. I lived on the top floor of it – but I wasn’t going to tell her that. I shot him a look, and he shrugged as if to say, I’m not judging.
I waited for Gwen to quiet down a bit before I let her go and gave the valet my ticket and a tip. He had my black Range Rover pulled up within minutes, and I handed Gwen into the front seat as he opened the door.
Gwen stopped crying in the car. She pulled tissues from her purse and wiped at the makeup that had smeared across her cheeks. “God,” she said, her voice still raw. “I look like a mess.”
“And yet, somehow, you still manage to look beautiful,” I told her. It was true. Gwen had “it girl” good looks – sex appeal with flaunting her sexuality.
She smiled at me, and her smile was watery. Then she shook her head, as if shaking my compliment away. We pulled up in front of the Topaz, and I left my keys in the car, waving the valet over. They’d be a bit confused as to why I wasn’t parking my own car, but they wouldn’t question me. I
handed Gwen out of the car, and we walked through the hotel lobby and into the small bar in the back.
I was right. The bar was practically empty. I got us a low table toward the back, one of the ones that had a single couch wrapped around it so that Gwen and I had to sit thigh to thigh. Gwen settled in and leaned back against the red leather seat. “Headache?” I asked as her eyes closed.
“Pressure from crying,” she said. “I hate crying.”
“May I?” I didn’t wait for permission as I took the clip out of her hair, inhaling the scent of her shampoo as her hair tumbled thickly onto her shoulders. “Here.” I shifted her so that she was turned away from me and reached a hand into her hair, rubbing at the back of her head, where she carried her tension.
Gwen was stiff a moment, and I thought she might tell me to stop, but after a second, she relaxed, her head falling heavily into my hand. This wasn’t my first rodeo. I knew what I was doing.
“Is that any better?” I asked, sliding my hand out of her hair as the waitress approached the table. Gwen nodded, looking slightly self-conscious.
“Martini still your drink of choice?” I asked her. She nodded.
“Two martinis,” I said to the waitress before she could greet me by name. “One wet, with gin; the other vodka, dirty.”
“I can’t believe you remembered my drink,” said Gwen, offering me a small smile. I remembered a lot more than her drink order. I remembered how Gwen liked to be touched; I remembered how to seduce her, what she sounded like when she came… Fuck. I wanted her badly. It had been a terrible week, and my grandmother was right: the only silver lining in this whole incident was that Gwen and I were together, and that only ten floors separated the two of us from a bed.
“I’ve got a good memory,” I said, and reached out, gently tucking a dark strand of hair behind Gwen’s ear. I let my hands linger there as my eyes skimmed her body. Anyone looking Gwen over might think her a prude: she tended to wear loose-fitting clothes and high-necked shirts that didn’t flaunt her cleavage. She seemed to go out of her way to present herself as pretty, not sexy – but Gwen was explosive in bed. And she liked sex. She’d never said no, never feigned a headache, and she’d always been easy as fuck to get off.
“I remember, for instance, that time you came up to Michigan, right after my season was over, and we took that car out to Lakeport Beach.”
Gwen smiled – it was the first real smile I’d seen all day, and it lit up her face and turned my insides to absolute mush. “You kept telling me that lake beaches were the same as Florida beaches. You tricked me into going into the water.”
“I tricked you into running into the water,” I corrected.
“I was so mad at you.”
“It was worth it. You screamed so loudly.”
Gwen shook her head at the memory, dabbing at her eye with the napkin. “God, I’m an emotional mess,” she said. “Now, I’m crying over a memory…”
“It’s okay,” I assured her. “Sometimes I cry over that one, too – with laughter – remembering how loudly you screamed when you went back to the car and found a raccoon in your bag…”
Gwen smacked me on the arm. “That’s mean,” she said. “That thing scared the life out of me.”
The waitress came back with our drinks, and as I reached for mine, I let my knee brush up against Gwen’s. I left it there. Gwen tensed a moment, as if deciding whether or not to move. But then she seemed to make a decision and let her knee rest there. Picking up her martini, she took a sip and nodded her approval. I took a swallow of mine, watching her over the glass the whole time.
Gwen’s lashes fluttered as she broke my gaze. She reached up and tossed her hair over her neck, a nervous gesture I used to think was incredibly sweet. “Law,” she said, looking back at me after a moment. “What are we doing here?”
I took another sip, considering the best way to answer her question. Then I sat my glass down and reached over, picking up Gwen’s hand. With Gwen, honesty was always the best policy. “It’s been a shitty week,” I said. “Seeing you has been the highlight. All I want to do, right now, is go upstairs, seclude ourselves for a few hours, and pretend like this entire thing has been one bad dream. I want to lose myself in you, Gwen. Because I remember just how good it was.”
I had her hand in mind, and I picked it up, running her knuckles along my cheekbone. Gwen’s eyes tracked my hand. Her jaw seemed to slacken slightly, and her eyes darkened, but she didn’t respond.
“No strings,” I said. “I don’t want anything from you. I just – I want to be with a friend right now. I don’t want to be by myself. I thought you might feel the same way. Do you?”
“Yes,” she breathed, her body swaying into mine. I smiled at her, letting her see just how hungry for her I was.
Then I leaned in close so that I could smell her hair, the floral of her perfume, and that clean laundry scent that always seemed to stick to her skin. I brushed my lips lightly over her cheek bone. “I’m glad it’s you with me,” I said. “I’m glad you’re here.”
She turned her face toward me, and I kissed her.
6
Gwen
It had been two months since I’d had sex. That wasn’t a record or anything, but my ex hadn’t been all that great in bed. And I’d been aching for Law since the moment I’d laid eyes on him. Law wasn’t the only one who remembered that weekend at Lakeport. More than the cold water and the incident with the raccoon, I remembered the cabin he’d rented. A small, one room, secluded thing where we’d practiced at least eighteen of the different positions I’d read about in Cosmo girl. That weekend we’d teased, we’d fucked, we’d made love, and I’d ended up so sore that I’d had to visit an OBGYN when I’d gotten home.
Three doctors had stood between my legs, examining my lady bits, before one had finally declared that I had “sex blisters.”
“What kind of kink are you into!” she had joked. “What’s wrong with that boyfriend of yours? Doesn’t he know about foreplay?” I’d neglected to tell the doctor exactly what Law knew about foreplay. The truth? Law was damn thick around, and we’d had a lot of sex. Whenever I wanted to get myself off, I thought back to that weekend.
I was thinking about that weekend when Law put his lips to my cheekbone, when he kissed me.
His lips were soft as satin, and firm as my mouth opened under his. His tongue swept in, and I felt my insides turn to liquid. I kissed him back, hungrily, suddenly afire with need for him. God – it had always been this way with Law. It was as if my body cried out for him and, once near him, wouldn’t rest until we’d joined.
His hand snaked into my hair, holding my head still as his mouth plundered mine. I whimpered beneath him, my body remembering all the things he used to do to me. Law not a very emotional guy, but if you’ve ever watched him play football… Yes: He’s that explosive in bed.
His free hand slid from my knee to my thigh, and I felt my legs parting for him, my chest pressing forward, breasts brushing against his jacket.
Law broke the kiss, his eyes shooting fireworks beneath his heavy lids. “Come on,” he said, giving me a small nudge toward the end of the booth. “Let’s take this upstairs.”
“Upstairs?” Was he going to rent a room?
“I live here. My apartment is on the 10th floor.”
I knew I should care that he’d planned this, care that he’d brought me to a bar that just happened to be beneath his apartment, but I didn’t. Not at all. All I wanted right now was for Law to fuck me senseless and make me forget about this horrible week. I knew he could.
Grabbing my drink and tossing it back, I got out of the booth and let Law lead me to the elevator, his hand hot on my low back, his fingers brushing the top of my ass. I wanted this. Badly.
In the elevator, Law hit a button for the top floor, and the moment the doors closed behind us, he pressed me against the wall and kissed me. One foot pushed my legs apart. He grabbed my hips, bent his knees, and ground against me so that I could feel the
thick length of his iron-hard cock pressing against my sweet spot. I kissed him even harder and tilted my hips into his: a blatant invitation.
When the elevator opened, he bent his knees lower and lifted me abruptly. I had to grab onto his neck and wrap my legs around his waist. My dress rode up my thighs, exposing my ass for the world to see.
But Law didn’t stop moving. He held me to him with one hand, his mouth at my neck, sending darts of pure sensation from my neck to my groin. I moaned.
I’m not sure how we got inside his apartment, I was too far gone to notice, but I gasped when he unceremoniously dumped me onto his couch. Then I could only stare as he started to strip. His jacket flew in one direction, his tie in another. I lifted the edge of my dress to take it off, but he growled, “No! Let me.”
So I stopped and watched, my mouth going drier and drier as he tore his shirt over his head, revealing a tattoo I’d never seen before: there were four slashes, as if an animal had torn his skin, and beneath his skin was a layer of iron. I reached out to touch it, but he grabbed my hand and pulled me up.
He had my dress off in a second.
“Oh, fuck,” he barked, and I was glad I’d had the foresight to dress in black panties and a matching black bra. Pulling me roughly to him, Law kissed me hard, unhooked my bra, and pulled it from my shoulders. Then he broke the kiss and got down to his knees, one at a time. He looked up, never breaking eye contact, and I trembled as he slowly hooked one finger underneath my black thong and slid it down my thighs. Eyes still on mine, his hands came up, holding my hips in place, and his head dipped down. Fuck! Fuck!
His tongue slid between my lips and glided upward over my clit. I moaned, and he did it again. Oh god. I closed my eyes, savoring the sensations shooting through me, and Law took that as an invitation to press onward, and he did, eating me with his whole mouth, his tongue working his way inside me until I was keening. Oh god!