“How did they take your news?”
“Mom was shocked. She told Dad.”
“What did your father say?”
“He said he hoped we were planning a wedding before I found out I was pregnant.”
Sierra’s father obviously wanted to believe that the baby came from their relationship and not the other way around. In person, he and Sierra would have to answer all their questions and allay their fears.
“Actually, I’m surprised Mom sounded as concerned as she did,” Sierra mused.
“They’re your parents.”
“I know, but they have a hands-off philosophy. They’ve always wanted me to make my own decisions and I have. When I fell in love with Travis, they just accepted that as part of my life.”
“I think when someone becomes a grandparent, it’s a turning point in his or her life. Maybe a grandchild will change the way they see you.”
As Sierra slid her legs under the sheet, Ben couldn’t help but remember how those legs felt around him, how his hands had caressed their curves. He wanted her all over again.
“Should I turn out the light?” she asked.
Ben suddenly wished he didn’t own a king-size bed. If they were in an old-fashioned double bed, they’d be close to each other again.
“Go ahead,” he suggested, propping his arm under his head, warning himself Sierra would probably want to go to sleep.
The sheet and cover rustled as Sierra moved about, finally settling on a position. She was across the bed, but facing him. “Ben?”
“What?”
“Can I ask you something?”
“Ask away.”
“Earlier, in the bathtub…Did I satisfy you?”
The question so completely took him off guard, he turned toward her. “Yes, you satisfied me. Did I satisfy you?”
“Beyond satisfaction. You make me come apart. Do you know what I mean?”
She was so utterly honest that he quickly did away with the distance between them and wrapped his arm around her. “I know exactly what you mean,” he murmured.
Her lips were very close to his when she whispered, “When you touch me, I feel like I’m on fire.”
“What about when I kiss you?”
She didn’t need to answer because the moment his lips took hers, she responded to him, kissing him back with as much heat as he was kissing her. He was beginning to believe he couldn’t get enough of Sierra, and that truth troubled him more than comforted him.
Chapter Eleven
“I love everything in the shop!” Sara’s smile was broad. “And Christmas is coming,” she hinted to Nathan.
The Friday after Thanksgiving was probably Sierra’s busiest day of the year. She’d advised Sara to come in near closing time so she could give her sister-in-law her full attention. Ben was supposed to meet them so they could all go to dinner.
“So how were the petroglyphs?” Sierra asked Kyle.
“Super! They’re older than Gramps.”
Nathan laughed as Sara wandered over to another corner of the shop to peek in a case. As she did, Nathan murmured to Sierra, “Can you pick out a set she likes and wrap it for me?”
“Sure I can. Do you want a necklace, bracelet and earrings?”
He nodded.
Sara was pointing to a jewelry display. “I think I’d like this turquoise-and-jasper one for Corrie. It’s something she could wear with her casual clothes.”
As Sierra crossed the room to remove the necklace, the bell on the door dinged and Ben came in. He’d left before she was up this morning. Everything about last night came rushing back. In between customers, visions of the two of them in the bathtub and in their bed had flowed through her mind all day.
Ben’s gaze met hers, and the impact of the collision made her tremble. The heat there told her he remembered last night as vividly as she did.
After hellos all around, he asked her, “Busy day?”
“Terrifically. But that’s good. How about you?”
“Busy. I just dropped in to tell you I can’t go along to supper. I have to stop at the police department. I have a meeting with a detective there.”
She knew better than to ask, “This late?” She knew better than to say, “On a Friday night?” There were no time restraints on crime and criminals and the work Ben did. She was terribly disappointed he wouldn’t be coming with them, but she wasn’t going to let him know. Still, she asked hopefully, “Do you want us to wait for you?”
“No. I don’t know how long this will go on. And Kyle will be asleep in his food if you don’t take him for supper soon.”
Nathan crossed to his brother’s side. “You can’t come along?”
“Afraid not. But I promised Kyle I’d take him to Madrid, which is an old mining village, tomorrow. Afterward we can drive up to Santa Fe and do the tourist thing. What do you think?”
Sara came to join them. “Do you have to be in the shop tomorrow?” she asked Sierra.
“I should be here for a few hours,” she answered, torn between caring for her business and wanting to spend time with Ben and his family.
“I’ll drive you in first thing,” Ben told her. “Then we can pick you up before we drive to Santa Fe. Is that okay?”
“That should work. But Ben, do you really think you have to drive me here?”
“Yes, I really think I have to.”
It was so hard to tell with Ben how much of his protective nature came from his sense of responsibility or because he really cared. She’d like to think it was a mixture, and that was okay for now.
Nathan frowned. “You believe if this Levsin brother knows we’re watching over Sierra he’ll stay away?”
“Yes, I think he will.”
“Are you sure you can take the time off tomorrow with the trial starting Monday?” Sara, who was also a lawyer, asked him. “I remember trial preparation. I never seemed to have enough hours before it began.”
“After I take you to the airport Sunday, I’ll have the rest of the day to finish preparing.”
“When you come home over Christmas you’ll have to decide if you’re going to stay with us or Corrie and Sam this time. I don’t think there will be enough room for you to bunk with Dad like you usually do,” Nathan said.
“I don’t know what’s going to happen over the holidays,” Ben admitted. “We might not be there for Christmas. Sierra’s parents are flying in.”
Both Sara and Nathan looked disappointed, but Sara was quick to say, “You must be thrilled to see your parents. It’s been a while, hasn’t it?”
“It’s been a year and a half,” Sierra confessed.
“Maybe instead of Christmas we’ll aim for New Year’s,” Ben offered. “I’ll make flight arrangements as soon as we hear from Sierra’s parents.”
There were a few moments of awkwardness, and Sierra wondered again if Ben shouldn’t just go home for Christmas and she’d stay in Albuquerque. She hated the thought, but she didn’t want him to miss out on holiday time with his family. They’d have to talk about it again later when they were alone.
When they were alone. Would Ben desire her again tonight? Or would he simply want to go to sleep after a long day?
He checked his watch and asked Sierra, “Are you ready to close up?”
“As soon as I pull a necklace from the case for Corrie and Sara picks one she likes for herself.”
“Good. I’ll walk you to your car and then Nathan can follow you to the restaurant.”
Ten minutes later Sierra had set the store’s alarm system and was walking beside Ben to her car. As she unlocked the driver side, he moved very close to her, his arms sliding around her waist. She turned in to him, feeling breathless and excited and ready to be close.
“It might be late when I get in. Don’t feel you have to wait up,” he suggested.
She could smell the lingering scent of his cologne. His hair was disheveled as if he’d run his fingers through it, and she’d like to do the same. There were fatigue line
s around his eyes, and she longed to ease them away…to kiss them away. But Nathan, Sara and Kyle were climbing into their car and they were standing in a public parking lot.
“I’ll try to wait up,” she assured him. “But if I fall asleep, wake me. Okay?”
“If you fall asleep, you need to sleep,” he replied gently. “You didn’t spend all day today on your feet in the shop, did you?”
“No. When my part-time holiday clerk came, I spent a couple of hours making jewelry this afternoon in the back room. I’m taking care of myself, Ben, and I want you to do the same. Will you get supper?”
He smiled. “Maybe I’ll find a doughnut at the police department.”
“Ben.”
He laughed. “I’ll go through the drive-through at McDonald’s on the way over. Will that make you happy?”
“I don’t know about happy. I’ll bring something home from the restaurant and have it in the fridge. You can warm it up when you get home.” She liked the idea of looking after him. Did he feel that way about looking after her?
Leaning into her, he kissed her lips soundly, but quickly. They both heard the rumble of Nathan’s car and knew he was ready to follow her to the restaurant. Ben stepped away from her and she felt the loss of his presence immediately and deeply.
After she climbed into her car, he shut the door. As she watched him walk away, she knew she was falling deeper in love every day. She just wished she knew what he was feeling. Maybe someday soon he’d tell her.
Ben stood on his side-door stoop in the carport, listening. It was almost midnight and all was quiet. The smell of piñon pine burning in woodstoves scented the neighborhood while the dry cold seeped into him, settled, then stayed. Once again he listened in case a car had followed him up the street, in case someone had followed him, parked half a block down and was walking toward him now. The wind blew through the junipers as he unlocked the door, stepped inside and disengaged the alarm.
At first the alarm system had seemed strange and wasn’t something he had thought he’d ever use. But now, as he closed the door and reset the system, he realized extra security was just part of reality.
The house was as dark and silent as the night outside. He knew his house, though, even without daylight. After he went into the kitchen and opened the refrigerator, he realized he was just too exhausted to eat. All he wanted to do was fall into bed and sink into sleep.
Making his way to the bedroom, he opened the door and stepped inside.
“Ben?”
The sound of his name on Sierra’s lips sent a surge of adrenaline through him, but he told himself not to pay any attention to it. She and the baby needed a good night’s sleep as much as he did. They’d have a full day again tomorrow with his family.
“Go back to sleep,” he soothed. “I’ll be there in a minute.”
It took little more than that to visit the bathroom, discard his clothes and slide between the sheets.
Sierra inched over to him, but still didn’t touch him, as if she wasn’t sure how she’d be received. If only she knew. If only she knew how much her touch and her smell and her smile affected him. If only she knew how much he fought those reactions…because if he gave into them he’d give into some kind of power she’d have over him.
“I brought home quesadillas and Christmas chili,” she said.
“Too tired to eat,” he mumbled.
Her foot lodged against his calf. “You’re cold.”
“It’s cold outside.”
Her foot tantalizingly slid down his calf to his instep. “Your feet are even colder. You’re not going to be able to fall asleep if you’re this cold.”
“Wanna bet?” he joked.
Suddenly she sat up and moved to the foot of the bed.
“What are you doing?”
“I’m going to warm up your feet.”
Before he had a chance to protest, her very warm hands had encircled his feet and were sharing their warmth. It felt so good to have her just sit there warming him. But then she was massaging his foot and other feelings besides warmth crept up his legs.
“Sierra—”
“Let me do this,” she said softly. “You’ve taken such good care of me.”
He hadn’t done any such thing. He’d just done his duty, tried to keep her and the baby safe.
Her fingers felt wonderful everywhere they touched. And the pressure of her palms had his blood flowing faster, and not just in his feet.
Her hands were working up his legs now, and when they reached his thighs, he did protest. “Sierra, it’s late.”
He couldn’t control his arousal. Any minute she’d know how much he wanted her, in spite of his fatigue, and the late hour and a busy day tomorrow.
Her long hair drifted over his stomach, down to his navel, teasing him.
“Do you know what you’re doing?” he asked thickly.
“The question is—do you want me to be doing it?” she returned.
“I don’t want you to feel as if you owe me anything,” he replied honestly.
“Owe you for taking good care of me? This has nothing to do with that. This has to do with being your wife.”
He didn’t know what to say to that, and as her hand enclosed him, as her head bent to him, he didn’t say a word. He didn’t even breathe. When she slowly rubbed her cheek against him, his hands clenched the sheets. When her tongue tasted him, his body became so taut he didn’t know if it would ever relax again. Her mouth was hot, and wet and soft. It was home.
The idea captured in that one single word almost filled him with panic. A woman signifying home. A woman signifying more than pleasure. The walls he’d surrounded himself with for years seemed to slip a little on their foundation and he found himself wanting to shore them back up. But Sierra’s lips, her soft, caressing touches left him defenseless.
He couldn’t handle being defenseless.
“Stop.” His voice was so gravelly he almost didn’t recognize it.
When she looked up at him, he reached out and clasped her waist with his hands.
“Do you want me to stop altogether?” She sounded disappointed…hurt.
“Jeez, no. Sit on me.” He still wanted to make sure they didn’t hurt the baby. He wanted to make sure he wasn’t too rough. He wanted to make sure she found pleasure, too.
Sierra pulled her nightgown up and over her head. As she revealed her body, Ben couldn’t help but run his hands over her shoulders…over her breasts. When he cupped her she moaned and he again felt the new heaviness there. Her body was preparing for his baby.
His baby.
He stroked her skin, finally taking hold of her hips. When she slid onto him, he thought he’d die of the pleasure of it right there. He guided her until he was deep inside her. There wasn’t a part of him that was cold now. He was on fire. And so was she. He felt her squeezing tighter around him…felt her body readying itself for release. When he touched her at exactly the right spot, she cried his name. There was so little light in the room, but he thought he caught a glimmer of a tear on her cheek. His own release rocked him, and shook him to his very core.
Moments later, as Sierra nestled into his side and he wrapped his arms around her, he wondered what had happened to the world as he’d known it. Suddenly Sierra was such a big part of it.
However, one question still plagued him. What if she left?
“This is Lois Driscoll. Is Ben Barclay home?” the unfamiliar woman’s voice asked Sierra on Sunday evening.
Sierra had wandered into the kitchen to prepare supper. Ben had been working at the table in the dining area all day and she hadn’t disturbed him. He was intensely preoccupied with the trial. His family had left this morning and she was going to miss them, but now that she and Ben were alone in the house, they wouldn’t have to worry about being quiet in the bedroom.
As Sierra turned to Ben to tell him who was calling, the name suddenly hit her. Lois. His former girlfriend? Fear began drumming an unwelcome rhythm in her chest as she co
vered the mouthpiece. Maybe it wasn’t his former girlfriend. Maybe it was another Lois.
“Ben, do you want to take this? It’s a Lois Driscoll.”
Ben had been studying notes on the computer, but now the name brought his gaze to hers. His expression went blank. “I’ll take it,” he said, pushing away from the table.
Sierra handed him the cordless receiver. “If you want privacy, I can go to the bedroom.”
He glanced at the counter with its salad fixings and the pot of water on the stove heating for pasta. “No reason for you to leave,” he assured her as he put the receiver to his ear.
But Sierra had a sinking feeling in her stomach that told her this was going to be a private conversation whether she stayed in the room or not. Still, there was no doubt she was going to listen to his every word.
“Hello, Lois.”
Sierra took out a cutting board and began chopping a pepper.
“Yes, it has been a while.”
Sierra minced the pepper into minute pieces.
“No, I didn’t know your firm would be involved,” Ben responded to something Lois said.
Sierra searched her mind for his former girlfriend’s occupation. Public relations, wasn’t it?
“You saw my name on the list? I see. I haven’t made a decision. In fact, I’ve hardly had time to consider it.”
When Sierra took another peek over her shoulder at Ben’s face, she realized he still wasn’t letting anything show.
He listened, then responded, “Yes, that’s right. I got married last month. Thank you. I appreciate your good wishes.”
Polite. Oh, so polite. And removed. Was he removed? Was his heart beating faster as he talked to Lois? Did he remember their time together? Did he wish things had worked out differently?
“Working with your firm wouldn’t be awkward. We’ve both moved on. But thanks for calling. I appreciate your thoughtfulness.”
Had a bit of warmth entered Ben’s voice? Did he want to see Lois again? Would they be working together? On what?
After he crossed to the telephone base and replaced the handset, he leaned against the counter and crossed his arms over his chest. If that wasn’t defensive, Sierra didn’t know what was.
The Daddy Verdict Page 14