by Mercy Cortez
Ms. Payne
I tried to pick you up this morning to no avail; I let Mr Edge know, he asked that I leave this and that you should come to his office at your next convenience regarding a young woman that goes by the name ‘Red’.
Kind regards,
Eric Stapleton
Fuck. So this was going to be his excuse to terminate my contract, I was still in my trial period and therefore he needed no warnings at all, he could fire me on the spot.
I shook my head and Carl took the note and read it, he screwed it up, opened the Taxi window and threw it out.
Chapter Nine
I walked to the elevator and hugged Carl wishing him luck, I was sad but if anyone was having this job I'm glad it was going to be him, he kept apologising but I told him it was fine.
I rode the elevator to the top floor, my heart raced and I walked as calmly as I could into Jareds office, I knocked as I walked in and he looked up from his desk with another man I didn't know across from him and he asked me to sit.
"Melissa I'm glad you got my note, this is Mr. Conlin, he is our artist manager, I asked him to join us for this" he pressed a button on his keyboard and Reds lyrics strummed through.
Didn't your mother warn you
Girls like her
Will make or break you
Many cracks in her armour
She is always questioning if you will harm her
She will keep you away
The angel of loves decay
She won't let you in
Only as far as she is willing to give in
You think you finally have her
Then she switches back to the insecure little girl
She is young, but wise
Lived so many different lives
You know, through her eyes
Her life is lived with a cover of disguise
You don't want to be outside of her
You try to calm her, make her shine
She does, but one word and she breaks
Cracks in her armour slowly mending themselves
She knows it hurts
When she questions the love she deserves
She knows it isn't fair
To expect you to always be there.
She has lived her life in silence
Now she wants to scream
But no amount of promises
Mean she will learn to dream
She fixes slowly
Then breaks quick
She isn't going to let her life
Mess up the only future, where she is a wife
No amount of insecurity could pull me away
All my love is with you, my baby
I was still as struck by her lyrics as I had been the first time I heard them, she had such an unusual voice, Jared stopped the music.
"Sophia called today, asking about if I received her MP3, I told her I had and that I knew she sent a cassette and that I didn't listen to it, I asked how these MP3 songs made it to me, under some duress she told me she had lunch with you, how you advised her on her musical career. Melissa, that is not your job, you assist me, you are not an artist recruiter, do you understand?"
I just nodded and was about to get up when Mr. Conlin started talking
"So - I spoke to Sophia and Jared and I convinced him to let me have you, I want you to be an assistant recruiter and Sophia asked that you help with her promotion and activities and so you will be her point of contact, your salary will remain the same after a month we will give you twenty two grand a year instead, you have promise Melissa, you let me down though and you will be out."
I stared in disbelief, what was happening? This was insane, I would be working with actual artists, my dream come true.
"I'm shocked, I can't believe it, thank you, I won't let you down" I stared at Jared, "thank you".
"I'll leave you in Jareds capable hands, I'll set up your office" Mr. Conlin left
We looked at one another in silence, he walked over and rested his forehead to mine and whispered
"I'm sorry" his words caressed me, he carried on "you really do deserve this job, I swear I'm not doing this to flatter you, before we do anything else we both have to confess everything, tonight, please - I guess - I miss you"
He was asking not telling, I liked that, I held his hand and said of course.
I left his office and went to Mr Conlin' s office, Mr Conlin was an older man; early fifties perhaps, he was rather optimistic, which I liked. He sat me down and discussed everything about my job and contract, the contract had many confidentiality clauses and basically stated I couldn't steal artists from this label or they would slaughter me.
Mr Conlin showed me to my new desk and left me to get settled in, I went to my old desk to collect my stuff, I saw Carl approaching and I completely forgot up until then that he was here, interviewing for my old job, I really hoped he got it, not just for Carl's sake but for having one less woman falling off Jared would be nice.
Carl smiled at me and I saw he was alone so I walked over and explained about my new job, he hugged me when Jared opened his office door to call Carl in, he looked confused and then said.
"Carl Johnston if you could finish manhandling my girlfriend and come inside for your interview I would fully appreciate it"
My cheeks turned crimson, he had never called me his girlfriend before; after so much silence I wasn’t sure I was anything. Carl looked like someone had run him over with a truck, like all his happiness had been dashed. He smiled weakly at me and went in for his interview; I would love to be a fly on the wall for that one.
I got back to my new office and was startled by the phone ringing, I answered and it was Red.
"Hi saskia, how are you?"
"I'm very well Red. So how does it feel to be signed to our label with an album in the works?" I grinned, I was so happy for, this is why I wanted to work in music so unknown singers like her could be heard.
"Saskia, it's incredible and terrifying, I am so busy recording and writing, I just wanted to say thank you, I know this was all down to you and your guidance and I trust that, I'm from a small place and I know there will be sharks in this industry but I know I can trust you, that's why I made them make you be a part of my team before I signed anything, you're a star Saskia" I blushed slightly, I think maybe Red and I could be friends.
Before long the day was over and I walked to the elevator when I bumped into Alistair.
"Hi, how come you're on the first floor?" I asked him; we hadn’t spoken much since the elevator.
"Well, I actually came to ask if you wanted to get a drink, you can't turn me down a second time" I half smiled, knowing Jared wouldn't like it, then my phone buzzed
Hi sask, I got it, got the job! Interview was so strange and you never said you were dating this guy! I'm at the bar across the street, come celebrate with me.
Carl was an unknowing life saver, I text back asking if Ali could come and sent another text to Jared explaining I was with Carl.
"Sure Ali, my friend is in the bar across the road"
We made it to the bar and after introductions we toasted to Carl, it was all going well, Ali and Carl both had a love for football to which I zoned out, this was all so easy, no tension or crazy fireworks just nice conversation. Carl started discussing his interview.
"Did you know that there is a no dating policy at GME records? Shame he doesn't practice what he preaches huh, Saskia. He asked me how I knew you, in fact the whole interview was about you, apparently I'm not allowed to blink in your direction" he rolled his eyes and laughed.
I felt some hands on my shoulders, before I could turn around Carl blushed
"Oh hello Mr Edge"
"Hello Carl, congratulations by the way. Alistair, didn't know I would find you here" he looked at Ali with pure contempt and then back at me wounded, he sat next to me.
"I'm sorry to barge in, I just need to talk to Melissa about some things, I figure I'm allowed, since she is my girlfriend after all" he may a
s well have picked me up and put me over his shoulder to show I was his, I was so embarrassed. Ali and Carl both nodded and I gave them an apologetic smile and left with Jared...my boyfriend.
"Failed to mention Alistair joining you, I figure because you knew I wouldn't be happy, why can't you just say no to him?" He was angry, his nostrils flared
"I tried, Carl wanted to celebrate so I thought.... maybe I could just take him too and kill two birds with one stone" I felt bad, but I knew I did nothing wrong.
"It doesn't matter, we have bigger fish to fry, if we are going to get everything how we want them we need to be honest with one another" he grabbed my hand and pulled me into his waiting taxi and we drove to his apartment.
Chapter Ten
We got up to his apartment, I liked it here, it was always safe and peaceful, everything was neat and in its place; the view was spectacular, I imagine he must have a thing for a view.
He sat me on his sofa and took my hand in his and clasped it there, he leaned in and gave me the softest most innocent of kisses, almost asking for forgiveness.
"Mel, I have things to say and I need you to listen, I've never told anyone but for us to move forward I have to. You can't tell anyone, ever. I want to trust you, I want to tell you, after so much silence I think you deserve that, deserve the truth.
“When I was six years old I was with my mother, we had just been shopping, it was Christmas time, cars and people everywhere, shops were rammed, I lost my mum a few times but I found her again.
"Then we were walking to the car, we weaved between a van and a car to get to ours, the van door opened and a man grabbed me, he had a knife and he stabbed my mother in the stomach, right in front of me, it scared me so much, I still remember her face as she realised that I had been taken and that she was powerless to stop it" he stopped for a second and cleared his throat, I had a feeling worse was yet to come.
"They drove out for hours, I had no idea where I was, they finally pulled up and blindfolded me, they led me through someplace, it smelt like decay and I heard woman and children crying and it stained through my ears to my brain, I already knew that I wouldn't leave the same. They brought me to a cage, they uncovered my eyes and had me chained up, I didn't cry, not yet.
"They brought out a woman covered in blood... She was dead in the eyes, on some sort of drug,...that woman..." his voice broke and he was my Jared again "she was my mother, they lay her in front of my cage and told me I had to keep my eyes on her at all times, three men took turns turns raping her and abusing her, I looked away once when one man was being so rough that she was crying for him to kill her and when he saw I looked away he rammed his finger inside her stab wound and she cried out so loud and he didn't stop till I looked back, I was six Melissa, then when they were done with her, I watched as they slit my mother's throat, and only then did I cry...
“I was there for three days, women, children, all being raped and injured, I couldn't stop it, I had no control, I had no control over anything. One night a man came to my cage, he ... decided it was my turn" I felt as the tears warmed my cheek, my Jared, six year old Jared all scared and alone.
"After that, the police rammed inside the building, I was so happy, but not many of us survived, I guess in that way I was lucky, I kept it out of the press by paying a lot of money to do so. That’s when we moved here, I lived in America as a child, but moved here after my mother. I have to have control Mel, I can't feel like that again, watching a man do that or want to do that to a woman I...I could love" I cuddled him and felt as his tears stained my shirt, he was so loving and caring but he lived with that secret for years. Our stories weren't too dissimilar and it amazed me that two people who had survived great ordeals had found one another. It suddenly all made sense, the charity benefit for abused women, I guess he tried his best to help, even if he protects himself with a facade.
"It's okay Jared, I'm here, no one will hurt me... I'm yours, all yours" he looked up and gave me his soft kiss for forgiveness again.
"Mel, I don't want to pressure you but I know you didn't tell me everything with your uncle" my mind switched back to the dream, I winced and he apologised.
"No, it's okay, I need to tell someone and I want it to be you, I trust you, too." He cupped my cheeks and cleared them of tears.
“When I was young my uncle ignored me, he barely looked at me and I was fine with that, when I turned thirteen he noticed me more, at that age I didn’t know his past with my mother and so I didn’t take much notice of him looking at me when I would wear pyjamas or a skirt, as time went on it got worse, my mum didn’t leave us alone together much because she knew, deep down she knew but she needed the money; it sounds bad but she didn’t know what else to do. One day my step brother, he is older than me and was born before she was married, he was ill, had to have his appendix removed and she couldn’t find anyone to look after me and she couldn’t bring me, so she left me with my uncle, I thought I would be fine, he sat by me on the cough, told me how I had grown up to be so pretty and I still thought it was innocent; he touched my thigh, and then leant in and kissed my cheek, I felt uncomfortable and then he kissed my lips, I pushed him away and he laughed saying it was just a family kiss so I didn’t mention it to my mum, a few weeks later I was getting ready for a shower and my mum was downstairs, I forgot to lock the door and he came in and saw me, he looked at me with lust in his eyes and it scared me so much…” I looked at him, he was listening intently, hurt written across his face “…He then pulled my body close to him and held me, my naked body close to him, I was thirteen but I knew that wasn’t right; he left me there and he went to his room. I finished in the shower and went to my room to get changed when he followed me in, he …he pushed me onto the bed and he stole my innocence, he took my virginity and my mum was just downstairs; he said if I told her that she wouldn’t believe me, that my mother hated me and wanted an excuse to get rid of me; he said my “dad” left because of me and she hated me for it and so I kept quiet; I never told anyone. He didn’t touch me again for two years. Then -“ my eyes started to water and Jared held me close while I mumbled into his chest “ he made her watch, it was my fifteenth birthday, he hit my mother over and over again, broke her ribs and her ankle, she had blood all over her and he tied her to a chair in the corner of my room; he told her how he had me two years ago and my mother shouted that he was my father; at first he was shocked and then he grinned and made her watch while I cried out for her; while he raped me again, he raped me three times in one night while all my mother could do was watch. When it was over he left the house and I helped my mum, called the police and they arrested him… he was given five years, he will be out in two weeks.” I felt as fresh tears sobbed out of me, he held me so close, we were so broken and we both knew that now. We had to be okay and we could help each other do that, he held me and stroked my hair, telling me over and over that it would be okay and then he made me look him deep in the eyes and held my face there.
“Melissa, I … I love you” he almost whispered, my mouth dropped open and then I smiled, he kissed my lips softly for a second
“I love you too, Jared.” With that he scooped me up into his arms and took me to his bed; he placed me lightly and I thought and wanted him to be inside me; instead he just laid there with me; cuddling me, telling me all the reasons he loved me until I fell asleep.
When I woke up he was gone and replaced by a note.
You looked beautiful sleeping; I had to go in early for work, help yourself to anything you want. Eric will pick you up as usual.
All my love
Your Jared.
I smiled at the note, so content, I heard a buzzing and looked for my phone; when I realised it was coming from Jared’s trouser pocket; he had left his phone by accident. I went to go put it on cancel and answered it by accident.
“Umm hello; Jar- Mr. Edges phone may I take a message” I said scrambling for words
“Oh, hello. Is Jared available? I’m meeting him today in about a
n hour… It’s Caitlin”
My mouth went dry, he left our bed to meet with her; I decided to dig a little
“Yes Caitlin, I have his diary here however he hasn’t written what the meeting is in regards to; I am his assistant; I can get a message to him” I heard her laugh a little down the phone.
“Dear, I’m not a client; I am a … friend” she laughed at friend and my stomach clenched, I wanted to be sick.
“I will see him in an hour; no point telling him I called, have a nice day, sorry I didn’t catch your name, dear”
“Oh; Melissa” I automatically wished she hadn’t asked; I couldn’t lie
“Have a nice day Melissa” she said it like it was a private joke and she hung up.
I got to work; feeling a lot glummer than I did when I woke up, I should have pressed more about Caitlin, I trusted if it was important he would have told me but he didn’t; I didn’t understand why, what did she have over him.
I went to my office and looked through the massive collection of CDs, flash drives and other items with MP3 music on them; I had an email telling me to listen to as many as possible, most will not spark anything but some might and to keep the ones I thought had potential. Surprisingly most were covers of songs. I listened to about ten and then I got to a man singing Woodkid Run Boy Run; the voice was brilliant; he sang it brilliantly and I listened to it a few times, and made a note of his name. He was definitely worth a meeting. Then I got to a girl who was singing an original piece.
Tears flood in you
your eyes burning
your heart scars with my name scratched deep
My face is gone
my heart betrayed by your lullabies
I’m a shadow of a girl inside
Hands are touching you
nothing takes the place of you
Heart wrench, weeps goodbye
Lullabies, beautiful and trusting