‘Every single night? Sure you can keep up the pace?’ she teased him.
‘Watch me. Sure you can?’
‘I can only give it my best shot.’ She pulled him close, feeling his weight pin her down on the bed. This was the way it was with her and Ross—the power of their lovemaking could chase away everything but the here and now. And he was right here, right now.
* * *
Ross watched as Tamara walked across the gravel drive from the entrance to the clinic. Her gait was so much better now that her prosthetic had been refitted, and she was gaining confidence with every day that passed. She was chatting to Laurie, who waved when she saw him sitting by himself on the cast-iron seat that was placed amongst the shrubbery at the front of the building. For all the world as if she wasn’t expecting to see him there, and as if her and Tamara’s arrival wasn’t perfectly timed.
‘Nice day.’ Laurie grinned at him, plumping herself down on the seat.
‘Yeah. I think it’s going to be hotter today than yesterday.’
‘I’d say you’re right.’
That was probably enough said about the weather. Tamara had lowered herself down between them, and she might begin to suspect that something was up if they went into any more detail. Laurie had planned this so carefully for Tamara, and Ross was looking forward to it as much as she was.
The sound of an engine caught Tamara’s attention. Well timed. Ross looked towards the entrance to the clinic’s grounds and saw a minibus making its way towards them. In contrast to the vehicle’s rather battered appearance, the trailer behind it carried three gleaming hulls.
Laurie was watching Tamara’s face, as the minibus drew to a halt in front of them. A man got out, stretching his legs, and two women followed. The side doors of the bus opened, and three more men jumped down onto the gravel.
‘They must be lost,’ Tamara remarked, and Laurie shrugged. One of the men had detached himself from the group and was jogging towards them.
But Tamara couldn’t take her eyes off the boats. It was obvious they were a very different kind of craft from the clinic’s, and that their light frames and graceful curves were state-of-the-art water-going technology.
‘Hi.’ The man stopped in front of them. ‘I’m looking for Tamara.’
Now he had all of Tamara’s attention, and she was staring at him open-mouthed. Laurie nudged her, and she let out a breath.
‘I’m Tamara.’
‘Hey, there. My name’s Grant Levelle. We heard you might be interested in coming rowing with us.’
‘Yes! Please...’ Tamara was on her feet before Ross could hold out his hand to help her.
‘Great. Would you like to come and meet the others?’ Grant was grinning from ear to ear. Tamara nodded, and he gave Laurie a nod before starting to amble with her at a slow pace towards the minibus.
‘When’s he going to tell her?’ Ross was watching as the group crowded around Tamara, each one shaking her hand as they were introduced.
‘Probably...right about now...’ She smiled as Grant bent down, pulling up the leg of his tracksuit trousers to reveal his own prosthetic.
Tamara was staring up at him, her eyes shining. Grant took her arm, guiding her out of the way as the rest of the group started to loosen the straps that fixed one of the boats securely to the trailer. He was obviously explaining everything that was happening, and Tamara was hanging on every word.
Laurie turned to him. ‘Did you see her face?’
‘Yeah. I think you’ve just made that young lady’s day. Probably her whole year.’ It was so nice to see Laurie’s obvious glee. ‘Why don’t you go over?’
‘I don’t want to crowd her. This is her treat.’ Laurie was watching the team just as intently as Tamara was as they unfastened the boats from the trailer. This was her life. Her teammates. She’d left them behind to come here, and Ross could see in her eyes how much she’d missed them.
He got to his feet. ‘I should welcome them. And let them know where the sandwiches and drinks are.’
‘Ah, yes. They’ll definitely want to know about sandwiches.’ Laurie jumped to her feet, leading him over to the group.
He welcomed each one of them, thanking them for coming and shaking their hands. Laurie hugged both of the women, exchanging jokes with the men and laughing at their suggestions that she’d been taking it easy for the last few weeks and they’d be seeing later how out of shape she was.
The feeling tugged at him like a long-lost memory. The one kid at school who wasn’t part of a group because he lived too far from everyone else. He wasn’t a part of this either.
Ross stuffed his hands into his pockets, making an excuse about having to go and see how things were going in the kitchen, and walked away. Laurie and Grant would look after Tamara, and he had other things to do.
Sam was standing inside the main doors of the clinic with a group of patients and staff, all watching what was going on. When she saw him, she fell into step beside him.
‘She’s in her element, isn’t she?’
‘Yes. Did you see Tamara’s face when Grant showed her his prosthetic?’ Ross would treasure that look. The moment that a teenager’s future seemed to open up before her eyes.
‘Yes, I did. Makes it all worthwhile...’ Sam looked up at him thoughtfully. ‘Actually, I was referring to Laurie.’
Something cold wound its way around Ross’s heart. Sam was right, Laurie’s face had lit up in just the same way as Tamara’s had when she greeted her teammates. It was a stark reminder that her life wasn’t here, with him.
‘Yeah. It’s a good day for Laurie as well.’
* * *
It was good to see everyone again, and to be around the everyday activity of people who took rowing seriously, the unloading of the boats from the trailer and setting them into the water. It was a temptation too. On a nice day like this, she wanted to stretch her shoulders and feel the pull of the oars. But Laurie contented herself with helping Grant make the adjustments needed to one of the sliding seats in the three-person scull, so that Tamara could give it a try.
‘Who is that guy, and what’s he done with Laurie Sullivan?’ Grant joined her on the grass, watching as Ross double-checked Tamara’s seat, talking to her and making sure that her position wouldn’t put her leg under any strain that she wasn’t ready for yet.
‘He hasn’t done anything with me.’ Well...that wasn’t entirely true. She and Ross had done a great deal with each other, but that wasn’t what Grant meant.
‘Someone has. The physio?’ Grant nodded towards Sam, who was spending her lunch break making sure that anyone who wanted to come out on the grass and watch could do so.
‘No. I made my own rule and I’m sticking to it. No rowing for another couple of weeks.’
‘We can’t tempt you?’ Grant grinned.
‘No, you can’t. Don’t even try. I need to get this hip properly sorted. Then I’ll be back.’
‘Fair enough.’ Grant leaned back on his elbows. ‘So you’ve taken to talent scouting in the meantime?’
Laurie rolled her eyes. ‘No. Tamara’s not committed to rowing, it’s fun for her and something that she can do at the moment. I know that you know the value of that.’
Grant had made the same journey as Tamara was making, and he’d made his choice of sport. Laurie knew he was committed to helping others do the same if he could, and that was why she’d called him. The team was on its way down from Scotland and Grant had persuaded a few of them to stop off for the day with some of the practice boats.
‘I know the value of it. I just never thought I’d hear you say it.’ Grant’s voice became a pitch higher in a bad impression of Laurie’s. ‘“Rowing’s a bit of fun. I’m not going on the water until I’m fully fit.”’
‘Well, that’s a different side of me you haven’t seen before, isn’t it? I’m a doctor too...’
Grant nodded, appearing convinced. Laurie wasn’t sure she shared the sentiment. She did feel different. She still wanted the water, the way she always had, but there were other things as well. Things that crowded into the box that she usually kept for rowing.
Maybe she was losing her edge. Maybe her father had been right, and too many other things in her life would blunt her resolve and damage her concentration. Even now, she was watching Ross, and not the boats that bobbed on the water.
‘You’ve taken time out before.’
Grant nodded. ‘You know I have.’
‘Was it difficult? Getting back?’ Laurie had convinced herself that this was just a delicious holiday. One full of sunshine, and this peaceful, optimistic place that Ross had built. And Ross himself, of course. She’d adroitly sidestepped the issue of getting back into competitive rowing again, because if she ever dreamed she’d lose that, she couldn’t enjoy this.
‘Nah. I came back better. Stronger, because I knew exactly what I wanted.’
‘I think I will too.’
She obviously hadn’t said that with enough conviction, because Grant raised an eyebrow. ‘You’re sure about that? Your hip is improving, isn’t it? Not thinking of retiring?’
Laurie chuckled. ‘Not while you’re still out there for me to beat.’
‘In your dreams.’
Ross had finished talking to Tamara and was strolling towards them. He sat down on the grass next to Laurie.
‘Nice place you have here.’ Grant smiled across at him. ‘Good stretch of water.’
‘You’re always welcome to stop by if you’re in the area. If you give me a call we’ll find somewhere for you to sleep if you want to stay overnight.’ Ross glanced at Laurie. Maybe that was an invitation particularly aimed at her.
‘Thanks.’ Grant answered before she could. ‘Is Tamara ready?’
Ross nodded. ‘Ready enough to explode if she doesn’t get to go out soon.’
‘Great.’ Grant got to his feet, rubbing his hands together. ‘Let’s get her started, then.’
They watched as Tamara walked a few unsteady steps across the grass to meet Grant. He took her hand, tucking it into the crook of his arm and instead of glowering as she usually did when she needed help, Tamara grinned up at him, talking excitedly.
‘Grant’s made a friend for life.’ Ross stated the obvious.
‘Yeah. Grant’s very committed to helping youngsters and he’s so good with them.’
‘It’s just what she needed. Someone who can show her that she can do anything she wants. We can tell her that...’ He turned to her suddenly. ‘You were the one who helped her to really see it, though.’
‘Just doing my job.’
‘No, you weren’t. You were doing far more than your job, Laurie.’
‘I’ve been thinking about what we were talking about the other night. You know, keeping on doing this kind of work.’
‘Yeah?’ Ross flopped down onto his back, staring up at the sky. ‘Come to any conclusions?’
‘Yes, I have. You’re right, I can’t be a proper mentor just yet, but I can start setting up a framework. Something that I can develop, with the aim of spending all my time on it later.’
‘That would work. Something like a small charity, with lots of room to grow.’
‘Yes, exactly. It would be a network, for teenagers. Maybe start with a website where they can find information about good trainers and good medical care. What they want would be the most important thing, not what other people want for them. We’d be entirely without any expectations of what the right answer for them might be.’
Ross turned to look at her. ‘And you could ultimately provide a transition out of sport and into something else if that’s what they really want to do with their lives? Or transitions into sport if that’s what they wanted.’
‘Yes, exactly. They come first, and we’d be advocates for them.’
‘It’s got a lot of potential.’
‘I’d start small, getting contacts and setting things up. And when I do retire from rowing, I can devote more of my time to it on a regular basis.’
‘You should talk to Sam about this. She’d be really interested in the idea, but she’d be the first to say that she doesn’t have your killer instinct.’
‘What?’ Laurie aimed a play punch at his arm. ‘You think I’ve got a killer instinct!’
‘You know what I mean. You’ve got the audacity to go out and push people out of their comfort zone to make something work. Sam’s got a lighter touch, she’s no less committed but she’ll kill you with kindness rather than running at you with a battering ram. It takes all sorts, and together you might be unstoppable.’
This was what Ross did so well. Putting people together. Seeing how different approaches might work in harmony instead of tugging against each other.
‘Could I count on your support?’ She hardly dared ask him. It would be a way of keeping one thread of contact with Ross.
‘Always. If the clinic can help you in any way, you only have to call.’
That wasn’t what she meant. The clinic could certainly help her, but it was Ross himself that she really wanted. Laurie hardly dared ask.
‘What about you, Ross? Will you help me?’
He pressed his lips together, and Laurie shivered in the afternoon sunshine.
‘I can’t. You know the reasons why, and that it’s not that I don’t want to. If you do this it has to be something for yourself and the kids you want to help.’
‘I’m planning on setting up a charity, not a dating agency. You want to help these kids too, I know you do.’
The reply was only half a joke. If Ross thought that this was her way of keeping in contact with him... It wasn’t, it was something that she wanted to do. But if one of the by-products was that she did keep Ross on her mailing list, and maybe in her life as well, it was an idea that suddenly appealed to Laurie a great deal.
He nodded, and for a brief moment she let herself bask in the idea that her future might contain Ross.
‘I do. But I’m sorry, Laurie, we can’t do it together.’
CHAPTER FOURTEEN
ROSS STOOD IN the doorway of the gym, watching as Sam and Laurie led the mother and toddler exercise class. Sam had brought Timothy in to help and being a little older than most of the other children in the class he was taking his responsibilities seriously, standing next to his mother and reproducing the exercises she was teaching. Clearly they’d been practising together.
Laurie was having fun, too. She moved amongst the group, helping those who needed help and quietly correcting the posture of anyone not keeping their back straight. A little girl started to fret, and Laurie spoke to her mother and then picked her up.
A month ago, Ross wouldn’t have believed what he was seeing. Laurie, smiling at the child on her hip, entertaining her so that her mother could exercise in peace. She was good with her too, bringing a smile to the little girl’s face with almost no effort at all.
‘This one works better with two...’ Sam raised her voice in a broad hint, but Laurie seemed intent on sorting through the toybox with her new friend. ‘Laurie!’
‘Oh. Sorry...’ Laurie brought the little girl back to the group, pulling a dismayed face. Her mother took her, telling her daughter that she could go back and play with Laurie as soon as they’d accomplished this exercise together.
Ross turned away.
He’d been thinking a lot about what she’d said the other day. It had sounded like an invitation, a way that they could keep in touch and explore the idea of continuing their relationship. Maybe even take it further... Every time he thought about the prospect, he felt intense happiness, coupled with physical yearning that almost stopped him in his tracks.
But watching her now... Laurie was growing and reaching out. Who knew what the futur
e would bring for her, or whether she’d be changing her mind about not wanting a family of her own?
He could stop wondering now. Trying to think of ways that he might share his life with her. Because the one thing he didn’t want to share with Laurie was the grief and heartache of wanting their own child and not being able to conceive. She deserved better than that.
* * *
By the time he heard a sound at the balcony doors, Ross had resigned himself to keeping their arrangement exactly as it was. There were only a few days to go before she was due to leave, and although they hadn’t discussed a date, Laurie had been reducing her work at the clinic. Taking her into his arms made that prospect a great deal easier to bear because it was then that Ross lost sight of everything other than the kiss that would so surely follow.
‘I’ve been thinking.’ She kissed him with the kind of passion that told Ross that whatever she had been thinking he was going to like it.
‘Uh-huh? You should do more of it.’ He nodded towards the bed. Dinner could wait.
‘Not that.’ She nudged his ribs with her elbow. ‘Or I should probably say not just that.’
Ross chuckled, stepping back and holding up his arms in a gesture of surrender. ‘Okay. So you’ve been thinking about sex and something else. I’ll leave you to lead with whichever you reckon ought to go first.’
She walked into the kitchen, peering into the oven to see what was cooking and nodding her head in approval. Then she sat down at the kitchen table while Ross poured them each a glass of wine.
‘I thought I’d just say it....’ She grinned a little nervously and took a sip of her wine.
‘That’s always a plan.’ Ross sat down opposite her, leaning across the table to take her hands between his. Whatever it was seemed to be bugging her, and a faint pulse of concern started to beat at his consciousness.
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