“What about Gretchen?”
Michael frowned. “Not quite.”
“I like Jenna, too.”
“That’s not too bad, but I’m not sure.”
“I’ll figure it out.”
“Oh, what about Lola?” He got up from the table and rinsed his plate.
“Like the song? It’s not bad, but I don’t think so.”
Michael left the room to grab his keys, and came back in. “I’ve got it, Cassie?”
“It’s not bad, but I still prefer Michelle.”
“I’ve got to go.” He wrapped his arms around his wife, knowing he made the right decision.
“What about Zoey?”
“Cute, I’ll think about it.”
“Zoey Michelle,” she called out after him as he headed to the door.
Turning to his wife, he smiled. “I like it.”
“You do?” Her voice was soft. Placing her hand over her belly, she repeated the name. “Zoey Michelle.”
“I’ve got to go. And Natalie,” he paused. “I love you.”
“I love you, too.”
The good news was that Marcus took the news better than he expected. In fact, he was eager to take control. The bad news is he could cut corners and put out a product with toxic chemicals in it. Michael had a choice to make, and he chose his family. He couldn’t be judge and jury, watching over every person’s life. Marcus would have to live with his choices, just like Michael had to live with his.
Chapter 8
He didn’t think it would take this long. In reality only a few weeks had passed. He’d once heard that for every ten thousand dollars you make, it takes a month of searching. He didn’t have that kind of time. Everybody told him the same thing – the job market had dried up. Competition was rough, and there were too many applicants for every opening. Even entry level positions, something he didn’t want to stoop to, were filling up with overqualified candidates.
He had a family to support. This wasn’t how it was supposed to happen. He made the right choice, walked away from a lucrative position to be with his family. Now he’d be lucky to have enough to pay the bills. There would be diapers and electric bills, and rent that seemed more expensive than he’d noticed before. Suddenly the reality of his choice was hitting home. It was foolish of him to walk away from that kind of security. He had a future, now he had nothing to show for his time invested.
Michael got down on his knees, sent up a prayer for help, and the scoffed at himself for thinking his prayer would be answered before anyone else’s.
He thought about his parents and how much he’d missed them while growing up. He’d never known much about his mom, except for what his father filled in. And his father never had much time to fill in the pieces of the puzzle. His father, well, he was in jail serving time for all of his misdeeds. Michael hadn’t seen him since that last time. He bowed his head. Cutting his father out of his life seemed like the thing to do at the time, only in this moment, his heart beckoned forgiveness. Michael shook his head, remembering all the lies and how he’d crashed his entire world to the ground. He’s still your father, echoed through his mind.
He pictured his daughter cutting him out of her life, and it cut him to the bone. He didn’t even know her yet, but he loved her more than life itself. He wondered if that was what it was like for his father. Did his dad wrangle with the same decision and just choose differently? Family, or bury himself in work, giving them everything he could. Forgiveness…it rolled around his brain.
“Are you okay?” Natalie joined him.
“There’s just a lot going through my mind.”
“Do you want to talk?”
“I want to offer you more. I feel like a loser, not able to find a job, and walking away from something that could have made us a fortune.”
“At what cost?”
“I know, baby. It’s just hard. I assumed there’d be something I could start right away. I’d just waltz into some company, and they’d be thrilled to have me.”
“It takes time.”
“Patience isn’t my strong suit,” he grimaced.
“It will happen.”
“I was thinking about my father.”
“Yeah?”
“I might go see him.”
“Okay.”
“I’m not sure yet.”
“Whatever you decide, I’m here if you need to talk.”
“I love you, Natalie.”
She settled in, leaning up against him. “And I love you.”
Michael ran his hand tenderly across her belly. Zoey Michelle would be here soon. All he wanted was to be a good father and husband. He needed to be a good provider too, though.
The call came through a week later. An old contact heard he was looking for work. They had a sales position, if he was interested. His reputation preceded him, and they knew he could close the deal. It wasn’t nearly what he was making with Bowman Industries, but it was respectable and offered benefits. Michael was thrilled.
Sharing the good news with Natalie, she reacted rather oddly. Her eyes opened wide. “That’s great.” Her voice was slow, strange. “Michael,” she said, grabbing her sides, “I think it’s time.”
“No, it can’t be time. You still have a few weeks.”
“Baby, I think she’s coming now.”
“Let’s get you to the hospital. I’ll bring your things up later.”
“I’m going to call the doctor in the car,” she said, finally letting go of her side. A wave of pressure had gripped her, sending a rolling contraction through her. She wasn’t ready. This wasn’t going to feel good. It was going to hurt. Panic started to spread through her. “I can’t do this.”
“You can do it. You’re going to be fine. Come on, let’s head to the car.”
“Michael, I’m not ready to be a mother.”
“You’re going to be a great mother.”
“You think?”
“I know.”
A deep breath, and she was heading out the door to the car. Driving to the hospital, Michael talked calmly, trying to soothe his wife.
False labor sent them home from the hospital. “If it hurts that much during false labor…” she trailed off. “And how will I know? They just tell me, I’ll know.”
“It won’t be long now. The doctor said you’re already at two centimeters.”
“Two. I have to get to ten. Do you know how big that is? Holy cow, the baby’s going to tear me apart.” She was scared, realizing a baby’s head would have to travel through a path she didn’t think it would fit.
“You’re going to be fine.”
“Sure, easy for you to say; you’re not giving birth to a football.”
Michael didn’t mean to laugh, but he couldn’t stop the outburst that followed that statement. Thankfully, it lightened the mood. He never knew lately. Natalie’s hormones left her unpredictable at times. She’d be cranky over nothing, or laughing over something that would normally set her off.
Natalie smirked. “Whatever. I’m just saying I’m afraid.”
“Honey, they have things to help. Women do this every day. If they can do it, you can do it.”
“I’m scared it’s going to hurt.”
“Just for a little bit, and then she’ll be here with us.”
Natalie rested her hands on her belly. “Okay, for you,” she whispered to Zoey.
“You have my number; you have the doctor’s number. You can call an ambulance if you need one. I have to start working next week. But the minute I hear from you, I’ll be by your side. You won’t be alone, I promise.”
Natalie nodded, and took a deep breath. “I can do this.” She wasn’t sure she believed it, but she figured if she told herself enough times, she’d start to believe.
Getting home, Natalie settled onto the sofa, trying to get comfortable. No matter what position she sat in, she couldn’t find a good spot. Sleeping wasn’t getting much easier, either. She had to sleep on her side with a pillow between her kn
ees, but she was restless.
Only a few hours had passed when Natalie felt the stronger wave. “No, hold out. It’s false labor.” She gritted her teeth, then clenched. Breathe.
Another one came…and then another. “Michael.”
He was sound asleep.
“Michael.” She nudged him, trying to get his attention.
“Huh? What?”
“I think it’s time.”
“Are you sure?”
She nodded, barely able to speak at this point.
“Okay, I’m awake.” He tried to gain some composure. His eyes wanted to go back to sleep, but he knew his adrenalin would kick in shortly.
Standing up out of bed, she waddled to the closet to pull on some clothes.
“Michael,” she called out, frozen like a deer in headlights.
“What is it?”
“My water just broke.”
“Okay, stay calm.”
“Holy shit,” she groaned.
“Are you okay?”
“Contraction. Oh my god, a big ass contraction,” she squeaked out.
“Stay calm, we’re on our way.” He went to get her hand and guide her out to the car.
“Wait! The floor; I have to clean the floor.”
“I’ll do it when I get home.” He threw a towel down, stepping on it for a moment, and got his wife to the car. “Natalie, how are you doing?”
“Okay,” she whispered. “I think it’s really happening.”
“It is, but you’re okay.”
“I know what they mean now when they said – you’ll know.”
“We’ll be there soon, just hang on.” He put his hand on her thigh, maneuvering the car out of the driveway.
When she squeezed it, he thought he’d lose his circulation. Man, did she have a grip.
“Michael.”
“Yes.”
“Hurry up.”
“I’m going. I want to get you there safely.”
“Get me there faster.”
“Okay.”
Pulling up to the hospital, they were admitted quickly. Zoey was on her way, and she wasn’t waiting for anyone.
Natalie thought it would be faster. The contractions went on and on, but she was dilating so slowly. She desperately wanted an epidural, but as it was her first child, she had to wait until she hit a certain point. Natalie cried. “I can’t do this.”
“You can.” Michael fed her ice chips, and stayed by her side. “You’re going to do great.”
“Michael, I don’t want to do this anymore.” She was pleading, tears in her eyes. “It hurts.”
“It’s almost over. You can do this.”
“I don’t want to.”
“Yes you do, baby. Zoey will be here soon.”
Only Zoey wasn’t there soon. Jack was.
“It’s a boy!”
“A boy…” The couple looked at one another.
Natalie was handed her son.
Jack Michael Davidson was beautiful. He had all of his fingers and toes, and the sweetest button nose Natalie had ever seen. “I’m sorry I was calling you Zoey. I didn’t know.” She cooed to her son.
Michael had never been more in love than he was in this moment. Seeing his wife, his son, he knew this was what it was all about. Was this what it was like for his parents? Did his parents feel this much love too? He knew he had to forgive him. He knew in that moment, he’d make time in his life to go visit his father once again. Everything washed away – the anger, the hurt, and all that remained was love. Looking at his family, he knew that this was what mattered. This was the secret of life.
Chapter 9
They were so nervous coming home from the hospital. Michael made sure the car seat was just right, and as they wheeled his wife and son to the vehicle, he realized this was it. There was no fall back, it was all on him. This wasn’t a dress rehearsal, it was the real deal.
Looking to his wife after they settled into the car, pressure mounted. He needed to figure this out. He needed to take care of them, provide, and be a good husband and father. He ignored the dizzy feeling in his head, his heart pounding in his chest, and gripped the steering wheel. He got as far as the parking lot.
“Are you okay? You look pale.”
“I don’t feel so good.”
“Breathe, baby.”
He was tugging at his collar, aching for air to fill his lungs.
As the panic rushed through him, his fists clenched. He white knuckled the steering wheel, holding on for dear life.
“Breathe.” Natalie tried to hide the panic in her voice. This wasn’t what she planned. She pictured them going home together, and having a picture perfect first day. Instead, she was unbuckling the baby from the car seat, and walking with Michael back into the hospital.
“Excuse me, my husband can’t breathe.”
“Right this way, sir.” A nurse brought a wheelchair over quickly. “Sit down.”
“We were in the car, about to go home. I just gave birth. His chest felt tight. He couldn’t breathe.”
“Okay, follow me. Sir, can you talk to me?”
“I’m here, I’m okay.” The room was closing in on him. His heart raced as his head got cloudier.
While Michael thought he might be having a heart attack, it turned out he was having an anxiety attack. As his body finally relaxed and the moment passed, medication helping his heart to slow, the nurse spoke in a soothing voice, explaining what had happened.
“Anxiety attack?”
“They happen.”
“But I don’t get them.”
“Congratulations, you’ve had your first.”
The doctor sent them back on their way, with a prescription in hand for anxiety medication and a note to see his family doctor. Thankfully, Jack slept most of the time, nuzzled into his mother. As they headed back out to the car, Natalie settled in.
“Will you be okay to drive?”
“I’m okay now,” he said calmly. “Promise.”
On arriving home, everybody was exhausted from the day, except for baby Jack, who was now waking up. Diapers, feeding…they were both afraid they would do things wrong. They figured it out as they went, and what started as a nerve wracking day ended with them curled up on the sofa, all napping together.
They’d figure it out, just like every other family does.
Michael’s new job had him flustered as he was learning new information. He picked up on most of it quickly enough. The one part of the job he wasn’t looking forward to was the travel. He enjoyed it when he was single, but now that he had a family, the thought of being away without them didn’t make him happy. Either way, he was grateful for the job.
Some of the stress was alleviated when he got his first paycheck. The reality that he wasn’t going to run his own company right now hit him hard, but once he accepted it, he was glad he had this to fall back on. He was lucky the job was here for him. He just had one more thing to do if he wanted to move forward. He needed to visit his father.
The idea was in his head, but he wasn’t ready. He thought he would be after seeing the birth of his son. He felt it in his heart, but now that the moment had passed, a wall stood before him. He knew he’d scale it eventually, but in time. There was no hurry. His father wasn’t going anywhere.
***
When he got the call that his father had a stroke in prison and was being transferred to the hospital under guarded care, Michael knew he had to see him. He hoped it wasn’t too late.
Seeing him, he didn’t look the same. His once silver hair that was always perfectly in place looked faded, like dishwater – a dirty gray. His skin was paler. He was thinner. There were bags under his eyes. And he couldn’t speak. Kent Davidson looked at his son standing at his bedside, but couldn’t say the words he wanted to. His body wouldn’t let him speak.
“I have a son.” Michael wiped a tear from his eye. “I should have told you. He’s tiny, so small, and perfect. We named him Jack.”
His father looked
blankly at his son, frustrated that he couldn’t respond.
“Dad, I’m sorry I didn’t come see you sooner.”
No words were returned. He was silent, only a tear running down his cheek. He wanted to speak, wanted to say something, but he couldn’t make his body cooperate.
Michael lowered his head. “There will be time. You’ll get better.”
Kent Davidson looked at his son.
Michael squeezed his father’s hand. “I should go.” Truthfully, it was too painful to stand there before his father, seeing him so vulnerable. He’d never seen his father this way. Even when he was going through the trial, he looked tired, weary, but not broken.
He knew he’d be back. They were family. He needed to get better so he could meet his grandson. He was a grandfather now. It would give him something to fight for. He had more time to serve, but he could do his physical therapy, speech therapy, all of it there. He’d be better. He’d get stronger. He’d be like Michael had always known him, a powerful, strong man.
Reality pointed to a weaker man. It pointed to a man that was growing older every year, and one that was smothered in stress. Michael’s father wasn’t going to recover, but Michael wouldn’t give up on him, not yet.
When the day came that he got the call, Michael Davidson dropped to his knees. He wasn’t ready to lose his dad. They hadn’t spoken enough. He forgot to tell him he forgave him. He forgot to tell him about how baby Jack smiles when you tickle him, and makes the cutest little noises. He hadn’t told him that he and Natalie adored one another and truly had found love. His father never met his son. Now like Michael hadn’t known his mother, his son wouldn’t know his grandfather. The pain was unbearable. He thought he’d recover, thought he’d be a survivor. It wasn’t supposed to happen like this.
Natalie tried to comfort him, but there were empty promises, words that weren’t spoken, and time that they couldn’t make up for. All she could do was listen to him. At first he didn’t want to talk. He had a far off stare, lost in his own mind, and his shoulders fell like that of a broken man. His heart was heavy, filled with regrets. He should have fixed things sooner. His father would never know all the things he did appreciate about him. How he taught him to throw a ball, and how to be a business man. He taught him how to be fearless. He taught him how to keep going, even when you fall down.
Contractual Obligation: The Trilogy Page 16