by Lexy Timms
“Oh heavens, I don’t do it for the money.” She turned to Edwin. “The truth is, I’m quite bored. Retirement seems to drag on day after day. You understand what I’m saying, don’t you, Edwin?”
“Hmm?” Edwin had a momentary look of a schoolboy caught daydreaming. “Yes, oh, yes, indeed. Lately the days seemed to all blend together, incredibly boring.” Marcus choked on his cookie and groped for his coffee to wash it back down where it belonged.
“Well... where?” Luke seemed lost, a little boy who had suddenly discovered this his mother had a life outside of him. If anything, he looked...petulant. Sulky. Dani blinked, trying to reconcile the adventurous, hero-type, mind-shattering lover with this new image. It was...interesting.
“Where what, dear?”
“Where do you work?”
“Oh!” Elaina smiled, and the room seemed to light up. Dani could understand why her father was acting the way he was; she was beautiful and smart and funny. And rich. Why would a member of a family that can casually hang a Rembrandt join the FBI? “I got a part-time job at Walt Disney World.”
Luke choked on his cookie. Dani scrambled into the kitchen to get him a glass of water, patiently ignoring the delicate crystal in the hutch. His mother was patting his back, in some bizarre attempt to dislodge whatever crumb had gotten stuck, Marcus was trying to give him the Heimlich maneuver, and her father was mindlessly taking another cookie and dunking it into coffee hot enough to burn. He didn’t seem to notice anything outside of the stars in his eyes as he stared wistfully at a sculpture of a man on a horse. Definitely a Remington.
Dani pushed Marcus aside and cradled Luke’s head against her arm, helping him to sip the water. He came up spluttering.
“DISNEY?” he said with a strangled cough. “What are you doing? Running around in a mouse costume?”
“I wish!” his mother said with some heat, waving off the suggestion with a pouty look that almost matched her son’s. “They get all the fun stuff. I drive the tram.”
“The train?”
“No, dear, the tram. It’s a large golf cart with a trailer; it gives old people a chance to get off their feet and ride through the park in comfort.”
He blinked a few times. “Why?”
She looked at him and crossed her arms. “Because old people need that sort of thing, Luke.”
“I mean...”
“I know exactly what you mean! You mean, why don’t I stay home all hours and wait by the phone on the off chance that my son might call me that day? You mean how dare I have a life surrounded by happy little children? Am I close?”
Luke looked from her to Dani, and to the other men. “Yeah?” he said slowly, “I suppose so...”
Abort! Abort! Dani edged away, not wanting to get caught in the fallout. She loved him, but she wasn’t crazy.
“Lukas Beauregard McConnell!”
“Beauregard?” Dani and Marcus and Edwin hit the name in a perfect chorus.
Luke crossed his arms and tried to disappear into the couch cushions. “Oh, shut up.”
“I will have you know, I work this evening. You are all welcome to stay the night, and Dani, dear, I would love a chance to get to know you better.” She turned to Edwin and then to Marcus, as though still somewhat perplexed as to how to deal with them. “Yes, well, we have the day to ourselves at any rate. How about if we go out to a late breakfast?”
Luke shook his head, sitting up and setting his water glass on the coffee table, only to have it immediately grabbed by three hands simultaneously trying to plant it on a coaster after another panicked look between the three of them, as though trying to gauge the worth of it. “No, Mom, really, I just came to get the statue.”
“What statue, dear?” Elaina busied herself with the coffee pot, pouring herself a second cup and doctoring it appropriately with sugar and cream.
“The one I sent you.”
She paused in adding a lump of sugar. “Oh, that! I didn’t know you were coming for it, you should have told me.”
“Well, where is it?”
It was her turn to look away, suddenly awkward and ill at ease as she gently set the sugar tongs on the tray. “I, uh... I gave it to someone, she... well, she was collecting items for a church rummage sale...”
“You gave away the statue I sent you?” Luke looked like a boy who just found his masterpiece had fallen off the refrigerator door.
“Well, dear, I’m sure it would have gone with the Rodin but, you see, I just don’t have the room to do it justice. It would’ve been too crowded, no one would’ve been able to see it...”
“I need it.” Luke had gone absolutely pale. So had Edwin, who was exchanging enough looks with Marcus that Dani was starting to wonder if they’d somehow managed telepathy. “I have to have it back, right now.”
“Well...” Elaina thought for a moment then snapped her fingers. “I know! We’ll see if she still has it. The bazaar isn’t until tomorrow, after all.” She reached into a drawer and pulled out a set of keys. “I’ll drive.”
“We have a car...” Luke started.
“I’m sure you do, dear!” his mother called as she walked out of the bungalow, waving her car keys. Edwin and Marcus scrambled to their feet so fast that they collided, knocking against a large planter and setting off a chain reaction in a glass display case that had everyone, with the exception of Luke, holding their breath until the rattling of delicate statuary and blown glass dissipated.
“But...” Luke called after her then finally sighed, and with a shrug turned back to the rest, hands outstretched, brow creased in frustration. “I guess she’s driving.”
“Beauregard?” Dani looked at him, unable to resist.
“Careful, Daphne,” her father said under his breath as he walked past her, giving the Picasso a wide berth.
“Like the duck?” Luke asked.
Dani closed her mouth, spun on one heel, and followed him out.
Chapter Four
Elaina led them out the front door and down the sidewalk, around to the back where there was a row of garages not seen from the street. She stopped in front of the nearest and pushed a button on her keychain. The door rose, and Dani found herself betting on the vehicle she was about to see. She was rather counting on a large diesel pickup with jacked-up frame, high riding with roller bars and chrome light bar. By this point she would have believed anything.
Seeing a Cadillac was somewhat anti-climactic. Until Elaina turned it over. The engine roared to life like a beast poked in its den. It nearly blew flame, and the entire car shook with the thunder under the hood.
“Wow,” Dani said, eyes wide with a new respect for a car she would have dismissed out of hand if she’d seen it anywhere else, and not had the benefit of listening to the engine. “Where did you get this?”
“Police auction,” Elaina said, smiling. “No dear, you sit up front with me; let the boys take the back.”
Dani scrambled in, sinking into plush leather that cradled her body like it had been made for her. “Police auction?”
“Yes, apparently it was part of a big drug bust. Do you like it? Not only does it have a great sound, but there’s all kinds of extra storage space you wouldn’t expect in car like this.”
Dani’s tongue hurt from biting it so hard. She sat in the front as Elaina ordered, and watched as the men vied for shoulder room in the back seat.
Elaina drifted to the end of the driveway, checked both directions and... drifted onto the road. The engine was thrumming under her, but Dani couldn’t figure out why the car seemed to be moving so... she looked at Elaina’s feet and realized she wasn’t pressing the gas pedal at all. The car was simply moving under the force of the engine at idle.
They worked up to a speed of about 20mph before Luke caught on.
“Why are we going so slow?”
“Because I wanted to show you... do you see that building over there, the one with the white trim and the tile roof? That’s where Mrs. Jenkins lives. You remember I told you
about her... oh, it must have been a year now, she was the one with the shingles. Well, they happened again.”
Luke glanced over his shoulder at the cars lining up behind them. His hand clutched at the seat in front of him, knuckles white. “We’re blocking traffic...”
“Yes, dear, you’re very perceptive. But look at that house. You’d think that someone with shingles couldn’t keep up that lawn, wouldn’t you? Well, she does have a gardener, of course, but it’s still an amazing...” She pointed to another structure, “That’s the Moynahans. They have a daughter about your age...” She turned to Dani, cheeks flushing a delicate pink. “Oh, I am sorry, it’s just habit with him now, I do apologize.”
“Mother...”
Dani waved away the apology, trying hard not to laugh. “It’s quite all right, but maybe we should hurry a bit?” She glanced in the side mirror, and shook her head. This was Florida, after all. Half the drivers on the road were creeping along with the geriatric set behind the wheel. Not that Luke’s mother was old. She shook her head to clear it, deciding that it was easier perhaps to just go along with the ride.
“She’s kind of skank anyway, so you needn’t worry. She’s not like Dani here. I don’t know the first thing about her, after all. I mean the Moynahans’ daughter...” Elaina continued chattering blithely, ignoring the snickers from the back seat. Dani shot her father and Marcus a look, starting to wonder if men ever actually grew up at all.
“MOTHER. Can we please get that statue?”
“Yes, dear. You know, I could just give you a couple of quarters, you could get another one.”
“No, thank you, I need that one.”
“But they really are a dime a dozen, they all look alike.” She turned to Dani. “I don’t know if you saw it, dear, but really, they’re all made by captured children in third-world countries.”
“I didn’t know that.” Dani nodded, and grabbed for the dashboard as Elaina slammed the brakes. “And there’s Jan Fielding’s house. Jan’s a good friend, a bit on the religious side, don’t get me wrong.” She put her hand on Dani’s arm. “I go to church religiously, but poor Jan, well, she really doesn’t have anyone else, so she buries herself in the church and everything they do. She’s very sweet, though, so it’s hard to hold it against her.”
“Mother, PLEASE! We need to get that statue!”
“Yes, dear, I understand.”
“Then why are we stopped here looking at a house?”
“Watch your tone,” Elaina scolded, and shot Dani a significant look. “You really will have to take him in hand; he could use a good scolding now and then.”
Dani was staring out the passenger window with a fit of uncontrollable giggling, trying desperately to get herself under control by counting plastic pink flamingos in the shrubbery. It wasn’t working.
Luke took a breath and spoke again in a measured and quiet voice. “Mother, why are we parked in the middle of the street when we should be getting the statue I sent to you?”
“Because Jan Fielding is the woman I gave it to,” Elaina said, looking in the rearview mirror to meet her son’s eyes. “It’s in there.” She pointed to the house.
Luke spun in his seat, dislodging the two men flanking him. “But—” He pointed out the rear window. “...your house is right there! I can see it from here! We could have walked!”
“Well, dear, you can walk back if that would make you happy. In the meantime, I need to park because I’m blocking the street. If you could please stop talking long enough for me to pull over.”
Marcus found something interesting in the door beside him, and Edwin was smiling and watching Elaina a bit too closely. Dani couldn’t stop laughing, her arms wrapped around her middle and doubled over so hard that her nose was touching her knees. “I...really...can’t...breathe...!” she complained between bursts of laughter.
“You have a lovely laugh, dear!” Elaina said to her and ran the front tire over the curb. The car fell with a bang that left the men in the back in a tumbled heap as she drove off it again. “We’re here!”
Jan Fielding was considerably older than Luke’s mother. Whereas Elaina was a trim, adorable woman in her fifties, Jan was... old. She answered the door, wearing slacks that came so far up her stomach it looked like she was hatching. The hem on the bottom of the pantlegs was halfway up her calves, making her look like she threw on her pants and just missed. Her blouse, a beautiful satin material that screamed money, was bunched up under the third chin. What was more striking was that the woman wasn’t actually fat, she just carried extra chins.
“Jan!” Elaina said. “This is my baby boy, Lucas.” She put a hand on Luke’s back and propelled him to the doorway, hissing under her breath, “Well, say hello, don’t be shy.”
Luke sighed. “Hi, you have a small statue that...”
“So, you’re the son!” Jan looked up at Luke with an expression that could curdle milk. Even Dani flinched. “I’ve heard a lot about you!”
“I... thanks. Listen, Mom gave you a...”
“And this is Danielle, his soon-to-be wife!” This time Elaina’s hand was on Dani’s back. A very sharp thumb stabbed her under the ribcage and she jumped, barely catching herself before she swung on the woman.
“Dani.” She held out her hand to introduce herself, shooting Elaina a look, vowing to not turn her back on the woman a second time.
“How do you do?” Jan said, and took the proffered hand. Dani’s face froze, and she surreptitiously wiped her hand on her shorts. “Don’t worry,” Jan said testily, “I was eating an orange when you rang the bell.”
“And this is Danielle’s father,” Elaina said, and—was that a flirtatious look she was giving him, her father of all people, as she introduced him? Dani froze, suddenly terrified for no reason she could name now that she realized there might be some reciprocation of affection.
“Dani,” Dani corrected, her mouth apparently on autopilot. Thankfully.
“Edwin.” Her father introduced himself and settled for an awkward wave hello.
“That’s confusing,” Jan looked at Elaina. “Is he Danny or Edwin?”
“I’m not sure,” Elaina confessed, throwing up her hands with a shrug. “I’ve been trying to figure that out all day.”
“Edwin,” he repeated, and gave Dani a look.
“I’m Dani.”
“Excuse me!” Luke interrupted, obviously well past done with niceties. “Mom gave you a small statue. A bird, I think it was. Do you still have it?”
“You don’t remember if it was a bird?” Elaina asked him, her brow knitting in a disappointed pout.
“Do you still have it?”
Jan blinked, looking at them all in turn. “No. Why would I have it?”
“Marcus.” Marcus raised his hand. For a moment he had everyone’s attention, and then subsided with a mumbled word that was probably better off unheard.
“No, I don’t have it!” Jan said crossly. “I told you that was for the bazaar!” She looked pointedly at Elaina. “I gave it to them along with a box of other useless crap I gathered around the neighborhood. You’d think out here you’d get something better than chia pets, and teakettles with the bottoms rusted out. But nooooo...”
“Well,” Elaina edged off the porch, seeming to be very interested in the flowers growing next to the door suddenly, “I’m sorry, but surely they can get something from it.”
“Sure, maybe a dollar. Maybe they’ll just throw it in the dumpster with all the other trash. What do you want it for? Hang on, I’ll get a quarter, you can go get another one.”
“Excuse me...but where’s the bazaar?” Dani asked, wondering why no one else was thinking to.
“Do I look like Mapquest? Elaina knows where the church is. Kids today...no idea about anything. I’d invite you in but I’m missing Jeopardy.”
Luke and Dani glanced at each other. He stood a moment, one hand on the back of his neck as though to work out a knot. When he finally turned and headed down the stairs, Dani f
ollowed.
Edwin offered his arm to Elaina and walked her back to the car.
“I’m driving!” Luke yelled over his shoulder, heading straight for the driver’s side door at a pace that would have made a mall walker proud.
“Nice to meet you,” Marcus said with a half bow, the only one to pause and thank the old biddy on the porch.
Except Jan slammed the door on him.
LUKE REFUSED TO ALLOW his mother to get behind the wheel again, despite her protestations.
“I drive for Disney!” she insisted as Edwin offered his hand to her; she took it reflexively that he might help her into the back seat. If his hand lingered a minute, Dani was sure no one noticed except her. She blinked and tried to process this, not sure how she felt about this development. Her mother was still alive, after all. She was discovering a hint of jealousy in the way her father was looking at another woman. It startled her, especially when she realized that she’d been fostering a tiny hope since she’d found out her mother was still alive, that maybe her parents could reunite and her family be restored.
And we could all live happily ever after. Damn, I need therapy. I can’t process this anymore.
“Disney! I hate to tell you this, Mother, but it shows!” Luke griped, firing up the engine and dropping the shifter into gear. The engine roared, and sprang to life like a demon had suddenly possessed the car. He hid it well, but Dani could see the surprise on Luke’s face. The gas pedal was obviously more sensitive than he’d anticipated. But then he hadn’t had the advantage of having sat in the front yet.
That’s good. Focus on the mundane. The car. The way it sounds. The way Luke looks like he’s just been put behind the controls of a tank and told to drive it in a figure eight marked out with Easter eggs.
“Ok, so how do I get to the church?” Luke called over his shoulder. He’d gotten a little firmer grip on the steering wheel. It had to hurt to speak with his jaw clenched like that.
“Go to the stop sign,” his mother said, pointing down the street.