by Amy Brent
“Just on the way home from meeting with a client.” Lisa replied walking over to Holly with worry etched on her pretty face. Holly had been honest with her about everything going on and Lisa had even met Aaron once at the apartment when they were closer to it than his, seeing how happy her friend was in the smile on her face. “I saw Aaron walking back. He looks unhappy, Hol.”
“I got a text from him. I need to make up an excuse as to why it’s over.” Her tone was sad and Lisa read the page closely, realizing that there was going to be a lot of good food in their kitchen soon.
* * *
“You could tell him about the baby as well,” Lisa suggested, looking at Holly as she glanced up. “I love that you’re into the health aspect of this, but all of the physical work isn’t going to help your head. I mean, you are keeping it and he should know too.”
“He loves hockey, Lisa. He’ll probably step down and he can’t do that. Aaron needs it in his life too much.” Holly told her stubbornly, her hand dropping to her stomach. “This little one is going to have two awesome moms here and my family will love the time that they get too. There will be holidays and all of that fun stuff.”
There was a lot that Lisa wanted to say, but this was new to her friend and she allowed her to keep thinking that was for the moment. She walked into her room to pull out her clothes and hang them up as she pictured Aaron in her mind. She had been jealous seeing Holly with him in a good way, because the man was gorgeous. He’d be snatched up in no time if Holly kept being insistent about not wanting all of this and she’d be really hurt. Lisa was aware that they both said it wasn’t that serious but they were clearly in love when seen together. Not to mention how happy his family would be about the baby.
The next day at work, Holly stepped into her therapy room as she sipped the orange juice that she seemed to depend on to get her through the day. One of the guys was having some leg pains that she was working on. Every step in this place made her think about Aaron and her body ran with the thoughts as she heated up uncomfortably. She pulled her loose curls up into a ponytail and wiped down the chair that she used quickly before he came in. Holly heard the door open and glanced up to see Walter enter as she forced a smile on her face. “I saw you come in. Shoulder?”
* * *
“Sit down.” He’d pulled it during the last game and she watching him sit down as she took another sip of the organic juice. He was dressed in a tee shirt for a workout and she pressed into his skin with her fingers. “You see Todd about this?” She worked closely with the team medical staff and all of the guys knew that nothing would get by either of them.
“It’s mild. Just a little muscle pull and it will heal. Don’t even suggest my staying out of the game because it isn’t happening.” Walter told her, making her laugh as she massaged him hard and deep.
“Such the cocky center you are.” She teased him back comfortable as her stomach rolled, realizing how hungry she was. He did too, chuckling.
“Did you forget to eat?” Walter teased her and she grimaced as she thought back to how she was throwing up nothing over eating.
“I was sleeping too late.” Holly glanced at the clock on the wall. “Mike should be here in about fifteen minutes. I can grab something after that.”
“Want some company?” Walter offered and she accepted easily. Despite his arrogance on the ice, she really liked him as a friend. She finished him up before grabbing a banana from her bag to eat before Mike came inside. Walter stayed in to chat as she pressed against his leg, laughing sadly inside as she realized that she was surrounded by hot guys every day and not tempted by any of them. That was reserved for Aaron. She checked on the intensity of it, choosing to ice it today after she was done with the intense massage. “We’re going to grab some grub at The Diner. Want to join us?” Walter asked Mike, who agreed as she glanced up with a frown on her face. “Is that cool, Holly?”
“Yeah, of course. I was just thinking about something.” She smiled at them to make it seem like everything was fine even as her head started to hurt as the thoughts invaded her mind.
An hour later, Mike was ready for the day’s practice and she was starving. They headed out onto the street to walk the short distance to the diner as Holly felt her mood rapidly changing, hating this part of pregnancy. Holly remained quiet knowing that she’d let loose on her roommate a few times in this state before she’d fed herself. It wasn’t pretty.
It took a few minutes with fans stopping them to get autographs from Walter and she stood back and watched as she sighed softly. They finally made it into the glass doors and she felt eyes on her as she stepped up to the hostess and asked for a table.
Aaron stood outside and across the street, watching her go inside with two of his teammates. He frowned, not blind to the fact that Holly was getting closer to Walter as time passed. Aaron couldn’t tell her not to spend any time with the players even as he was constantly aware of how beautiful she was and how they might want to get involved with her at levels that she might not be able to handle.
* * *
CHAPTER TWO
* * *
Holly pushed away her plate with a happy sigh, seeing the absence of all of the food that she’d ordered. The guys were done as well, wiping their faces with napkins as Walter observed her with an intent gaze. He offered to pay for all of them as she shook her head and he insisted, laughing as Mike instantly accepted.
“Fine.” Holly gave in, watching as Walter threw some big bills on the table. The three left with Mike going back to the arena for some light exercise to stretch himself out and Walter left eying Holly as she stared at him. “What? I said thank you.”
“I’ve just been noticing things the last few weeks. I am a little worried about it.” Walter told her, making her heart race as she wondered what he meant.
“Meaning what?” Holly pressed, challenging him with her eyes.
“My little sister is pregnant right now. Lil is about three months along and I am noticing similarities between the two of you here and there. Hell, today you looked just like her going out to eat right now.” Walter said softly as her eyes widened and her face paled. “Are you pregnant?”
“Oh my God. It’s that obvious?” Holly said before she covered her mouth with her hand.
“Not to everyone, I’m sure.” Walter assured her, his eyes seeking hers. “Does he know?”
I…no. It’s complicated. I’m on my own.” Holly admitted, watching him frown as Lisa’s words filled her mind. “I can do this.”
“I’m not saying that you can’t, but I’d want to know if it was me. I think we’re friends enough for me to say that.” Walter told her firmly, making her shake her head.
* * *
“Well, I think we both know it isn’t.” She told him, looking up and down the street. “I’ll be okay.”
“I will be here for anything that you need, Holly. Appointments, meals…anything.” Walter told her, watching a tear slide down her cheek as she wished that it was Aaron telling her this and pulling her into his arms. “I don’t want you to be alone.”
She nodded as she gave him a hug, willing to take what he was offering. It wasn’t the right person and not who she wanted, but Walter was a good support system and a good man. She was much more scared than she wanted to admit and Holly whispered her thanks to him as she pulled away. She started to wander down the street slowly, staring at the windows absently as she thought about everything. Her phone chimed and she slipped it out of her purse to see that Aaron was calling. She swallowed the lump in her throat and answered it in a soft voice, hating what she was about to do.
Holly let the tears fall as she hung up after giving him every excuse in the book about why she didn’t want to see him anymore.
It was wrong.
They could get in trouble.
She didn’t want to be with him anymore.
The rest blurred in her mind as she heard him arguing back, telling her that he didn’t want this. Holly could swear that
she heard tears in his voice as he spoke, graceful when he ended the call so she could cry.
Finding a small park with a bench, Holly sank down and cried harder as she realized that Aaron was gone. She’d done it. She was pregnant and on her own in New York, looking up and seeing that nobody was looking at her as they walked by or jogged.
It just made her feel more alone.
She ended up in some baby stores, looking towards her future as she eyed baby blankets and cribs. Their apartment was small but they had a small den where she could set up the baby’s room. Holly wasn’t sure if the fancy changing tables were necessary as she looked at them, deciding that a thick blanket and any safe surface might do the trick. The strollers were pricey and seemed impossible for her to own, despite her job and she knew that she didn’t have twenty girlfriends to have a big baby shower with.
She was home and showered by the time practice started, wearing her comfortable yoga pants and a loose tee shirt, feeling like her stomach was showing her predicament. Lisa walked back into her therapy room, cleaning it up before she took a seat to watch them and see how everyone was doing. Holly knew that her skin was pale and that her eyes showed traces of red from all of the tears she’d cried, though everyone was focused on the players on the ice. Walter glanced up at her, smiling as she nodded back at him with a forced smile.
Aaron sat on his couch staring forward, knowing that he could be at the practice but not wanting to see Holly right now. It was harder for him to think about going in when they were over more than it was when they were together. At least then he could talk to her. Now she acted like she never wanted to see her again. He didn’t believe that she was really done despite the phone call, feeling angry and lost as he sat in his house alone.
Aaron was not the kind of guy to pursue a woman who had made it clear that she didn’t want to be with him and he’d always been that way, usually moving on with something casual easily. He didn’t want to harass Holly, but he didn’t believe her. Aaron leaned back and decided to give himself the day to wallow and be a human the next day, though tonight wouldn’t include whiskey.
They were both needed at the arena the following night for a home game and she cried all the way up until she took a shower, since Lisa was at her graphic design job for the day. She washed her face under hot water as she felt dried up, wiping it off with a soft towel as she stood naked in front of the mirror. Holly was still slim and she ran her hands over her stomach slowly. She wasn’t showing yet but she knew that there was a life in there. What would she do when she was clearly pregnant? What would Aaron say?
Holly felt like she should create something to go with her pregnancy, have a relationship to fall back on. She couldn’t even imagine that.
She was in her room and dressed for the game before it started, her hair in a long French braid down her back. Holly heard the team coming down the walkway and she added some red lip tint to her dry lips to give herself some color to her pale face. Holly saw Tanner walk inside and she smiled his way as she walked forward to pretend to be an interested sports therapist that wasn’t broken inside.
The game was touch and go with her boys winning by a goal at the end of the game, celebrating on the ice together as she let out a long sigh. They all seemed healthy and that was a good thing. Her eyes drifted to the bench to take a quick look at Aaron, seeing the way his jaw was set and the circles under his eyes. He didn’t look good and she glanced away quickly as she saw him start to return her look. They’d played this game the entire game and she wanted to take back everything and drag him to his office and make him scratch her itch desperately. That had gotten her in trouble before but what could it do now? She was horny.
At her first appointment about the baby, Holly found out that the pills she’d been taking were bad when they’d been distributed. There were probably going to be several surprise babies for a few women but why did she have to deal with it in her situation? She had asked for every bit of information that she needed and noted websites that she should visit on her phone in the notes app. Holly left crying as she walked home.
* * *
CHAPTER THREE
* * *
The next couple of weeks passed by slowly and painfully as she kept up her strong front for everybody, dropping that at home and little by little with Walter. He was a really caring guy underneath it all and he helped. Aaron seemed to get back into the game as she watched him from afar, she being into her job that was going to support her and the child inside of her. She knew that it would be ugly when she had to tell the team but she had great health insurance until then and she was going to take advantage of it, since she might lose her job for lying anyway. What a complicated web she had weaved.
The next trip was going to be a week from then and she packed as many snacks as she did clothing, all loose and comfortable for her to wear as she hid her condition. Holly knew that she needed to go shopping soon for maternity clothes and she both loved and hated the idea. She was really in love with her baby even with all of the pain that came along with it.
The phone calls had stopped as well as the texts. Aaron pretended that she wasn’t there most of the time, the anger still in his gaze when it did pass over her before he went to speak to the team doctor. She missed their talks and missed their intimacy but she made friends with the team and a couple of their girlfriends. It was nice hanging out with other people and she appreciated it when they were kind about her pregnancy, letting her do what she needed as they drank and partied around her. It was part of being with a team and she liked watching them.
Lisa was getting excited about the baby as well. She’d dropped the talk about Aaron though Holly still saw the expression on her face sometimes that told her she thought about it. They slowly set up what they could in the shoe box of a den before a month later when she’d be finding out what it was with Walter and Lisa. He’d gotten into it, getting excited when everything was going well and joking around about corrupting his niece or nephew.
Holly also noticed a bit of a spark between him and Lisa as they got to know each other.
She carried on, beginning to wear her maternity jeans and slacks when she didn’t wear her go to yoga pants. Her stomach was small but it showed that she was having a baby and she still fought to cover it up.
Aaron watched her go everywhere with Walter as they’d leave the arena, talking seriously and closely as they walked to his monster of an SUV. After games, after practice and they even arrived together a few times. Holly looked beautiful and different to him somehow as he watched her when she wasn’t looking. She was glowing and…something else. He couldn’t put his finger on it. Maybe she was happy with his center. Maybe she was having the kind of sex with him that he’d had, making him hit his desk as he sat alone in his office.
The team was moving quickly. There were a few great sponsors signing on and they were in a winning streak. It took a lot of time for Aaron that would otherwise be spent thinking about Holly and he appreciated that.
One night, he went out drinking with them as he found the thoughts too much. Walter was conveniently absent and he looked around as he threw back the whiskey that he was familiar with, half listening to something that one of the coaches said. “You in there, Neller?” Pat teased him as he looked at his friend. “What’s gotten under your skin lately?”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Aaron said bluntly as Pat shook his head.
“I like that you’re hands on with all of this, but there’s more to life. Aaron, I am here a lot as well but I also balance time with my own family.” Pat told him, making Aaron look at him. “Hell, you’re young. Get laid, at least. You’re a hot ticket in this city.”
Aaron shook his head, letting his eyes pass over the players that were drinking and talking to some of the ladies in the bar, remembering those days. Those days before Holly. He found the gaze of a pretty black haired woman as he continued to look, with bright blue eyes and a soft smile as she blushed. His neglected coc
k reacted before his heart did, making him realize that he needed to give up waiting for Holly and start living again. He returned her smile, forcing the small sense of hope that was buried under his pain forward as he stood up.
At the next game, Holly noticed the hockey on his neck as she frowned and her heart broke again. Who was she? She was feeling bloated and fat and he was off gallivanting, as he should be. She focused on the game happening before her with a scowl, trying to pay attention to her players. They won with a few goals advantage and she stood up to scream and clap as the stadium roared with fans. Maybe she could move past this and love what she did again without feeling the pain of her mistake.
Holly was too tired to go out to eat and Walter offered to take her to a quiet dinner. Aaron watched them before he went to Marcy’s apartment for a way to release his emotions, eating quickly before kissing her against the wall as he closed his eyes. She was kind and willing to be with him on his terms, nothing serious or public. She wrapped her arms around his neck as he kissed her hard, feeling her full breasts pressing against him as he moved his hands down to her ass. Marcy groaned hard as he squeezed tightly, feeling his pain in his grip. He ripped off her dress and tossed it onto the floor, taking her bare form in from the light of the kitchen as he realized what he was doing. He was going to fuck her thinking of Holly, but the hell with it. Aaron slipped his shirt off of his shoulders and kissed her again, lifting her to carry her to the bedroom.
He sucked on one of her nipples hard as his fingers worked inside of her, listening to her cries and wishing that she smelled like Holly. Marcy preferred the smell of vanilla and it was heavy in the air as he curled his fingers and felt her release on him with a choked cry. He moved down her body to lick her hard, always willing to please a lady no matter what the situation. Marcy grabbed his hair, rocking against him as he heard Holly in his mind but tasted another woman on his lips.