by Jim Galford
“So you…”
“Yes, I ate human and elven meat, Raeln. I told you there are things I’ve done I’m not proud of. I don’t care how many of us the Altisians skinned, killing the hunters for food is not something I want to repeat.”
They sat in silence a while until Greth grabbed his pack from where it lay near Raeln. He dug through it, muttering occasionally at one item or another that was missing. Eventually he managed to fish out a wrapped bundle that he sniffed and offered to Raeln.
“A peace offering, if you’re hungry,” he said, waving the bundle in front of Raeln, wafting the smell of meats. “Some jerky.”
“Where’d you get that?” asked Raeln, taking the cloth-wrapped meats and picking a piece out of the bundle. It was heavily seasoned and difficult to identify.
“Olis dropped it.”
Raeln shoved the jerky back at Greth, who grinned in unrestrained amusement.
“I’m kidding, Raeln. I brought it from Lantonne. I couldn’t resist the timing, though.”
Grumbling at Greth, Raeln took the piece he had removed from the bundle and handed the rest back. Nibbling gingerly at it, it found it to be dried pork, a meat they rarely had much of in Hyeth. After so long traveling with little food that had not been caught on the run, even such a simple snack seemed like a delicacy.
“Can I ask you something?” Greth asked after tearing off a piece of jerky himself.
“Should I say ‘no’ to urge you to ask anyway, like you did with Ilarra?”
“Back in the elf town,” Greth went on, ignoring Raeln’s question, “you were supposed to be mated to Ishande, right?”
“Married, yes. I was not obligated, but my mother wished it and I have a hard time refusing her.”
“Why weren’t you more upset when she died?”
Raeln looked over at Greth to see if he was joking, but his expression was very serious. “I barely knew her,” admitted Raeln. “I’d fought her several times, but we were more or less strangers.”
“Still, she was going to be with you for…decades? I can’t even imagine how long you might live with the elf-magic, but I know it’s longer than I’ll be around. She was cute and she was supposed to be yours…even if you didn’t know her well, I would have expected a little more anger or shock. I think the elf girl was more torn up than you were.”
“I’ll probably live another sixty or seventy years, if you don’t get me killed first.”
“Lihuan is…was…the oldest wildling I’ve ever met, and I think my father said he was only thirty-five or so,” mused Greth aloud, looking stunned.
Raeln studied Greth’s face, having forgotten how much younger he was. They were about the same physical age, but Greth was only a little more than four. Likely, Greth’s father had been around Raeln’s age, a sobering thought for him.
“Greth, I’ve lived among both bonded wildlings and unbonded my whole life,” he explained. “I have a brother who is nearing thirty years who had no bonding. His grandchildren are your age. I have watched my family, friends, and even their children grow old around me while I remain a child by our race’s standards. I’ve gotten used to watching people pass away each year. Ishande was just another wildling—admittedly someone I should have cared for but never got the chance. If I could have given my life to save her, I would have, but knowing that changes nothing.”
Greth thought about that while staring at the ceiling of the cave. “She confided in me before she died. She thought that you weren’t interested in her.”
“I told you, I didn’t even know her well enough for that marraige.”
“Back in Lihuan’s pack, I can assure you that half the males there would have offered themselves to any female like her in a heartbeat, regardless of how well they knew her. Most males I’ve known aren’t too picky about who they mate with, at least in the short-term.”
“Growing up where I did instilled somewhat different values, Greth.”
“Ishande disagreed. She thought you might not like females…something about her mounting you during a fight and you weren’t even distracted…”
“What are you trying to say?”
Greth snapped out of his distant thoughts and looked suddenly apologetic. “Nothing bad, Raeln. She wanted me to tell you that she was okay with whatever you did or didn’t feel toward her. There was no anger. Had she lived, she wouldn’t have pushed you on the issue. I should have told you sooner, but…honestly, I didn’t think you were good enough to get to know that.”
Raeln felt his temper flare at being questioned about such a personal topic. His skin prickled at the accusation—one he had heard whispered for years and ignored—and he got up, intending to march into the rain outside and leave Greth until he had time to stop being angry.
“What?” demanded Greth, sitting up with a pained grunt. “I tell you that you have no reason to feel guilty about the poor female’s death and you get upset about that?”
“No,” Raeln snapped in reply, the anger fading almost immediately at seeing Greth truly did not understand. “The bonding has certain responsibilities you likely didn’t have out here in the wilds. With it, I’m expected to protect Ilarra with my life, lest we both lose ours. I am expected to marry if she marries. If she had children, I was to provide children who might bond with them.”
“The great warrior and protector didn’t want little puppies nipping at his heels?” Greth grabbed Raeln’s wrist as he started to storm off. “I’m kidding…mostly. I take it that wasn’t exactly your first choice of things to do with your spare time?”
“What would your people have done with a wolf that had no interest in taking a wife, Greth? Would they have been understanding, or would they have torn him apart as a freak? My people might not kill with claws, but words and looks can be nearly as bad.”
“My people?” asked Greth, releasing Raeln’s wrist. “If you mean Lihuan’s pack, they would have done about the same as yours. There were festivals meant to increase the size of the pack, if you know what I mean. A couple males and females went out of their way to be away from the village during those festivals and got some weird looks, but no one said much.
“We had this one male ferret I know was eyeing every new male that showed up. We were all misfits there, so a couple wildlings that didn’t fit in wasn’t really a surprise to anyone. They did what they wanted and the rest did things their way, no arguments, no conflicts unless someone really wanted Lihuan to rip them up good.
“Now Olis’ pack, that’s a different matter entirely,” Greth went on. “If one of his people let on that they wouldn’t mount the first female they caught and dragged back to the pack, I doubt he’d have left their head attached for more than a second or two…assuming they didn’t run away. There, if you weren’t intending to breed, it would be smarter to just pretend or you’d expect to have your head on a pole by nightfall. Trust me on that, they weren’t kind to anyone who disagreed with the rules.”
Raeln could see a haunted look in Greth’s eyes and wondered exactly what had happened between him and Olis’ pack. “Fine,” said Raeln, lowering his eyes. “I had no interest in Ishande or the other women my mother pushed in my direction. Take that for what you will.”
Clenching his hands in frustration at not being able to walk away from Greth and feeling weak for his admission, Raeln took a slow breath and sat back down. He had been judged by everyone he had ever known in Hyeth, with or without them actually trying to find out the truth about who he was. He hardly knew Greth, appreciated his neutral tone on the matter, but dreaded seeing the disgust in his eyes. That look was exactly why he had never told anyone and done his best to hide it, even from himself.
“I’ll leave once you’re strong enough to travel,” Raeln said eventually.
“Why?”
“I’ve seen how men treat men like me. They get uncomfortable around them, even if they don’t mean to. We have to trust each other to survive this far from the cities, so I’d rather leave you before you feel
like you can’t count on me.”
“Are you planning on groping me in my sleep or something, Raeln?”
Raeln sat up sharply, glaring at Greth. “No. Why would you even ask that? Do your people do that to people they travel with?”
“I don’t, but if you don’t either, then why would I care? It means nothing either way to me. Give me a better reason why you would run off.”
“You have a life out here, Greth. There have to be survivors somewhere. The elf Olis was dragging around is proof not everyone died. Go and find them…I will go back to Hyeth and continue hiding in plain sight until Ilarra returns and decides what will become of my future. It’s better for both of us.”
Greth got up and moved to kneel directly in the path Raeln had taken to staring blankly toward. He looked genuinely angry, though Raeln could not figure out why. “Is this just because I figured out that you don’t like females? You think that’s reason enough to run off and mope until your owner comes back and gives you a treat?”
“Not funny, Greth.”
“Wasn’t meant to be. I don’t take well to people who try to play victim. Those who do are prey out here, not people, and I have a deep-seeded desire to treat them that way. Be proud of who you are, or you really are no better than Ilarra’s pet.”
Raeln tried to look away, but Greth grabbed his jaw and turned his head back.
“Give me a month or two,” Greth asked of him, the anger slowly fading from his expression. “Help me find the others. I could use the extra help avoiding Olis and scouts from Altis. After we either find the pack or I give up looking, you can decide if you really want to go back to Hyeth. Right now, you have nothing there to go back to, so there’s nothing to lose by staying with me. Besides, I’m better company than elves. Agreed?”
Yanking Greth’s hand off his muzzle, Raeln stared at him for a long time, trying to make him back down, but the man never budged. Finally, he nodded in agreement, if only to ease the tension between them.
“Good,” muttered Greth, throwing his pack against the cave wall to use as a pillow. “About time you did something sensible without me having to beat it out of you. You’d think, with twenty years on me, I wouldn’t have to be the mature one here…I hate being mature.”
Chapter Two
“Understanding”
The lands you now inhabit are yours for all time. This I have ensured through blood and promises that I hope none will ever need to endure again. I have given everything to provide to you what I have looked on at the time of my last days.
Due to my younger days’ mistakes, we conquered far and wide. That time is gone and we now have a chance to live in peace with our neighbors and watch the world grow and flourish. My wish for all of you is to maintain this, no matter the wishes of those who might seek to lead you back into those old ways.
The lands we held, I have set free to guide their own futures. This is never to be undone. Any leader of our people who claims otherwise should be cast down and forgotten to history. The great desert, the mountains of the south, the river lands of the east…all of these are to be left alone for all time.
This I command of you.
- Original wording of a command written in the last notes of Turess prior to his death.
The lands you now inhabit are yours for all time. This I have ensured through blood and promises that I hope none will ever need to endure again. I have given everything to provide to you what I have looked on at the time of my last days.
In my younger days, we conquered far and wide. My wish for all of you is to maintain this, no matter the wishes of those who might seek to lead you otherwise. This command will stand for the council alone to determine and those of the clans will not be taught of this command.
The lands we held, I have set free to guide their own futures for the moment. The great desert, the mountains of the south, the river lands of the east…all of these were ours once and will be again in days to come.
This I command of you.
- Current wording of the Command of Expansion as taught by modern Turessians.
Ilarra tried to steady herself, keeping her eyes on the sky that filled her vision in all directions. She knew if she looked down, she would get dizzy and risk falling. “Explain to me why this is a good idea,” she said, feeling one of her boots slip a little in the snow that had yet to melt off at such an altitude.
“You need to put aside fear and listen only to yourself and me. So long as the Turessians continue to whisper into your mind, you will be unable to control yourself if my influence slips. Strengthening your resolve will make it easier for me to keep you safe and more likely that you can stall any attempts by the Turessians until I can intercede. This last month was meant to stabilize you, but you must have something to fall back on if I am away.”
Against her better judgment, Ilarra looked down briefly. Her head felt as though it were spinning as she saw the vast open space where the lip of the mountaintop ended under her toes and fell away thousands of feet to the woods below. Before she could yank her eyes back to the blue sky, she even saw a bird flying by a few hundred feet below her. “I’m going to be sick,” she admitted, raising her arms to either side in an effort to regain her balance.
“Then you will be dead. I told you at the start of this I am saving you as a courtesy to an old friend, not out of any loyalties. If you cannot perform a task as simple as standing on a rock, you are beyond my aid. I will allow you to perish.”
Ilarra glared at Nenophar where he stood on another outcropping of the peak several feet below and to her left. The man maintained perfect balance and a relaxed demeanor, even when the stones under his feet shifted occasionally. He had stood there watching Ilarra for more than an hour, undaunted by the risk of falling.
“How long do I have to do this?” she asked, feeling herself wavering slightly as a strong wind pushed at her.
“Until you understand you can die at any time and you no longer concern yourself with that fact. With that understanding, you will have taken your first important step.”
Turning at the waist to keep from having to move her boots, Ilarra looked longingly down the narrow “path” they had used to scale the last fifty feet of the mountain peak. She had practically crawled up on hands and knees, and now wondered if she would be able to make it back down without sliding off onto the steep slopes to either side.
“Do you trust me, Ilarra?” asked Nenophar, following her gaze.
“No…why should I right now?”
Nenophar seemed undeterred by her actual response and made a flicking motion with his fingers. As he did, the path they had climbed up on tore apart, stones tumbling off both sides. In seconds, the entire path had been destroyed, leaving no route down the mountain.
“Why would you do that?” Ilarra asked in dismay, her boot slipping sharply on the small perch. “How will we get down?”
Nimbly stepping between the loose stones as he made his way up to her, Nenophar pulled a rolled parchment from his shirt. He held it out toward Ilarra.
Taking the parchment from him, Ilarra asked, “What’s this?”
“That is your way down, Ilarra. Read it and use it. Your only other option is to fall. Either way, I believe you will learn much.”
Ilarra hurriedly unrolled the paper and saw that it was covered with scribbled notes and symbols that were as obscure to her as the books of magic she had learned from might be to the untrained. Whatever that scroll held, it was outside her realm of expertise.
“What is it?” she asked, turning the parchment around in case she was reading it upside-down. The scribbles were as complicated that direction as the other. “I can’t read it. Besides, you told me I can’t use magic or it’ll give the Turessians more of a hold on me.”
“We’re going to work past that or hurry the progress of their control over you. Either way, we cannot wait around forever.” Nenophar leaned closer as he talked and turned the parchment, placing it back in her hands the way she had held i
t originally. “You don’t need to be able to read it. I need you to find one of the Turessians in your head that can. They will do the work, but you will have to keep them from forcing you to do anything. With their help and some determination on your part…”
“Then what? I can read an old piece of parchment? That doesn’t get me off this rock.”
A sharp gust of wind pushed Ilarra off-balance and she slid, dropping to her knees. One knee came down on a loose stone that fell away, bouncing down the cliff. She barely managed to keep her grip on the parchment as she lay gasping for breath on the stones.
“What do I need to do?” she asked, her voice cracking and her hands shaking.
“Relax and stare at the parchment. They will do the rest, but being relaxed is essential. I will also ease my protections against the Turessians.”
Ilarra dragged the parchment toward her face. She stared at it, waiting for some inspiration, but it would not come. She was nearly ready to crumple the parchment into a ball and throw it at Nenophar when a whisper came across the edge of her consciousness.
“We do not use these enchantments anymore,” said a man’s voice that was not Nenophar’s. “Dabbling in old magic is unwise.”
“Far too dangerous,” a woman added, and for a moment, Ilarra felt as though someone was leaning over her shoulder. “Dorralt warned us about this. Too much magic in one place. Risky. Burn the scroll before someone finds it and causes serious damage. Our enemies could use this to gain advantages over us.”
“Just tell me what it says,” Ilarra replied, feeling foolish for answering voices that she knew were inside her head.
A different man laughed. “The girl wants to learn. Let her learn. Our master would not object to that. If none of you will give her the knowledge to learn from her mistakes, I will. We all are made stronger by the efforts of those who are willing to risk themselves.”