by Meg Cabot
She wishes to know if you intend to spend the night there, and if so, will you return in time for breakfast in the morning, as, it being Saturday, she is going to make blueberry pancakes.
She would also like you to know that she would be happy to make enough for your companion, Rebecca Flowers.
Now I’m going to shoot myself for having been forced to text all that.
Reed
12:01 AM
Tell Carly yes, I’m at Becky’s.
Yes, I’m spending the night.
Yes to pancakes. I will force Becky to come too even though she says she’ll be too embarrassed.
We’re going to have a lot to talk about tomorrow.
Marshall
12:04 AM
You’ve just made my wife squeal with happiness. It’s been months—maybe years—since I’ve heard my wife squeal with happiness.
Thanks for coming back, bud.
Reed
12:05 AM
I told you I would.
CRIME REPORT
Information in the Crime Report is obtained from calls logged by the Bloomville Police Department.
11th and Main, Bloomville—Resident Summer Hayes reported a barking dog. Officer Corrine Jeffries dispatched to investigate. A warning was given to the dog’s owner.
Kroger Save-On, Bloomville—Altercation over bacon reported between two men in the meat department. Officer Henry De Santos responded. Both men arrested and charged with disorderly conduct, public intoxication, and misdemeanor assault.
Country Club Road, Bloomville—Off-duty officer responded to a residence at which minors were reportedly drinking alcohol. Parents of minors involved notified, warnings issued.
Leeanne Matsumori created chat “Reed Stewart”
Leeanne Matsumori
09:07
Becky, are you up?
Becky Flowers
09:07
I’m up.
Leeanne Matsumori
09:07
WHAT HAPPENED LAST NIGHT AFTER WE LEFT?
Becky Flowers
09:07
I can’t really talk right now.
Leeanne Matsumori
09:07
Why, are you at work? It’s Saturday. You work too hard.
Becky Flowers
09:08
I’m not at work. I’m at home. I’m just not alone.
Leeanne Matsumori
09:08
Why? Who’s there?
Becky Flowers
09:08
Guess.
Leeanne Matsumori
09:08
OMG HE STAYED OVER?
Becky Flowers
09:08
He stayed over.
Leeanne Matsumori
09:09
HOW WAS IT????
Becky Flowers
09:09
How do you think?
Leeanne Matsumori
09:09
Amazing?
Becky Flowers
09:09
More than amazing. Even better than before.
Leeanne, I’m so happy. I’ve never been happier in my life.
He saved all my letters. And my emails. And my texts.
Leeanne Matsumori
09:09
He saved them?
Becky Flowers
09:09
Yes.
In a binder.
Leeanne Matsumori
09:10
A binder?
Only you would find that romantic.
Why didn’t he answer them?
Becky Flowers
09:10
He couldn’t. He didn’t know what to say.
He knew we couldn’t be together, since he couldn’t live in Indiana. But he didn’t want to ask me to move out to California, since he knew how excited I was about going to school.
And he didn’t feel as if it was fair to ask me to wait for him (which he was right about—it wouldn’t have been).
So he just freaked out and did nothing.
And then the longer he did nothing, the less he knew what to say.
And then he figured I’d probably just forgotten about him.
Leeanne Matsumori
09:10
How male of him.
Becky Flowers
09:10
Right? I know.
But he’s been stalking me on Facebook.
Leeanne Matsumori
09:10
Oh, wow, you guys are perfect for each other. You do the same thing to him and his entire family.
Becky Flowers
09:10
I know. Except I didn’t tell him. So could you please not mention it if you see him?
But like I said, I can’t really text right now. We’re going over to his brother’s house to eat pancakes.
Leeanne Matsumori
09:10
You’re going over to his brother’s house to eat pancakes?
Becky Flowers
09:10
I know. I sound like a freak. Do I sound like a freak?
Leeanne Matsumori
09:10
A little bit. Please don’t tell me I came all the way back from Japan only to have you move to LA.
Becky Flowers
09:11
What? NO!!! I am NOT moving to LA.
Leeanne Matsumori
09:11
Then how is this going to work? Is he giving up his golf career?
Becky Flowers
09:11
No. I’ll tell you later. Let’s have lunch.
Leeanne Matsumori
09:11
Lunch? You’re just about to go eat pancakes.
Becky Flowers
09:11
I know. Why don’t we meet at Matsumori’s?
Leeanne Matsumori
09:12
Sure, why not? I’m still on Japan time. It’s tomorrow there right now. What does it matter?
Becky Flowers
09:12
Thank you. And thank you so much for everything you did last night.
Leeanne Matsumori
09:12
Of course. For you? Anything. Although I just have to say after what I saw over there . . . are you sure you want these people as in-laws?
Becky Flowers
09:12
100% positive.
Leeanne Matsumori
09:12
OK. He must be pretty amazing in bed.
Becky Flowers
09:12
Reed
9:42 AM
Marshall, how many acres come with the old Bloomville Elementary School?
Marshall
9:42 AM
Where the hell are you? I thought you said you guys were coming over. The girls want to put on some kind of performance for you after we have breakfast, and then I have to take them to soccer.
Not all of us have Saturday off, you know. Some of us have responsibilities.
Reed
9:42 AM
We’re coming. We stopped at Kroger. We’re picking up champagne.
Marshall
9:43 AM
What the hello do we need champagne for?
Reed
9:43 AM
To make mimosas. You can’t have pancakes without mimosas. What are you, a heathen?
Marshall
9:43 AM
Sometimes I forget that you are the most annoying person in the history of time.
Reed
9:43 AM
How many acres come with that school you’re selling?
Marshall
9:43 AM
Twelve, including parking and the building. Why? And what the hello happened over at Trimble’s last night? You know Dad is really pissed. He’s called me like four times.
He says Too Bad Tony is moving out and taking Ty with him, to Tampa of all places. That can’t be true, though? Like Too Bad Tony would ever hop off the Trimble Money Train.
Reed
9:44 AM
No, it’s true about Tony. He’s actually a good guy.
Isn’t the back of the old Bloomville Elementary on the sixteenth hole of the country club’s golf course?
Marshall
9:44 AM
Yes, Reed. A lot of things have changed since you were last here, but they haven’t moved the golf course.
Reed
9:44 AM
So if I buy the school and turn it into a junior golf academy, do you think the club will allow me use of their greens? I mean for my pupils?
Marshall
9:44 AM
I’m sorry. It’s a little early for jokes, even for you.
Reed
9:44 AM
No joke. I want to buy the old elementary school.
I’m going to expect the city to knock down the price a little because of the asbestos. Removing it from a building that size ain’t gonna be cheap.
Plus, I’ll be bringing in a lot of business. I plan to make my classes free, because more people should play golf. It’s accessible to everyone, since it’s a sport that anyone of any size, shape, age, and sex can play.
Marshall
9:45 AM
Reed, have you and Becky already been hitting the champagne?
Reed
9:45 AM
No. I’m totally serious about this. This is all stuff you can use in your pitch when we give them our bid.
My school will keep the youth of Bloomville off the streets and provide them with a safe, healthy environment in which they can learn a game that teaches discipline, respect, honesty, and teamwork, while also helping to hone conversational skills and physical fitness with minimal risk of bodily injury compared to other sports.
Marshall
9:45 AM
Are you on drugs?
Reed
9:45 AM
I’m high on love, man.
Marshall
9:45 AM
You’re high on something.
Does this mean you’re moving back to Bloomville?
Reed
9:45 AM
Well, not for the whole year. That would be ridiculous. There’s snow on the ground here for a good three months. How would I practice?
But for the rest of the year, yeah. My girlfriend has a business and family here. She’s not going to abandon them.
And I have family here, too. I may as well start a business, too.
Marshall
9:46 AM
Okay. Yeah. I get it. When you get here we can find out about whether or not the club would give you greens rights.
I can’t imagine they wouldn’t because you’re Reed Stewart. I’m sure they’d be honored.
And then we can draw up an offer on the school.
But where are you going to live? In Becky’s apartment in her mom’s basement? (Just kidding.)
No, but seriously though. Where?
Reed
9:46 AM
I think Becky likes Mom and Dad’s house.
Marshall
9:46 AM
You want to buy Mom and Dad’s house.
For your girlfriend.
Reed
9:46 AM
For both of us. What’s wrong with that?
Marshall
9:46 AM
Nothing! I’ll draw up the paperwork for that, too.
Reed
9:46 AM
Make sure it includes the chandelier. Becky really likes the chandelier.
And I especially don’t want Trimble to get it.
Marshall
9:46 AM
I hear you, brother. Anything else?
Reed
9:47 AM
No, I think that’s it.
Oh, okay, Becky’s back. We’ll be right over.
Marshall
9:47 AM
Great. See you in a bit.
Marshall
9:47 AM
CARLY YOU ARE NOT GOING TO BELIEVE WHAT REED JUST TOLD ME.
Carly
9:47 AM
Marshall, I have asked you repeatedly not to text me from the bathroom. It’s disgusting and unhygienic.
Marshall
9:47 AM
HE IS BUYING THE SCHOOL.
Carly
9:47 AM
First you tell me your sister and Too Bad Tony are splitting up, then you tell me your brother is buying the old elementary school. Do you really think I’m going to believe all of these lies? I’m happy I’m here to entertain you with my naiveté.
Marshall
9:48 AM
I’M NOT KIDDING. HE’S BUYING MOM AND DAD’S HOUSE, TOO.
Carly
9:48 AM
You aren’t as amusing as you think you are, Marshall. Come out of there and help me find the champagne flutes. If they’re really bringing stuff for mimosas, we need to serve it in the right glasses.
I don’t want Becky Flowers thinking we don’t know how to behave like civilized human beings, even though of course we don’t because I think this performance the girls are putting on for them involves a war dance by none other than our favorite historical figure, Chief Massasoit.
Marshall
9:48 AM
Reed’s moving here. For part of the year, anyway. They’re going to live at Mom and Dad’s, and Becky’s going to run her moving company, and he’s going to run a free golf school.
I bet they’re married by New Year’s. He isn’t going to want to mess around this time. He’s going to want to lock her down.
Carly
9:48 AM
GET OUT OF THE BATHROOM AND HELP ME.
Marshall
9:48 AM
He did it. He came back like he said he would, and did it. My little brother.
Carly
9:48 AM
And be sure to wash your hands!!!!!!
WITH SOAP.
Nicole F
9:02 AM
Don’t even try to pretend like Reed didn’t spend the night last night. Mom and I both saw his car.
I expect a full report later.
Nicole F
9:05 AM
That was fun at his sister’s house, but what a byotch! Someone should fully report her to Adult Protective Services. Or maybe Child Protective Services.
Nicole F
9:10 AM
And if later you hear from her (Trimble) that her life-size Dalmatian statue is missing from her yard, it totally wasn’t me who took it.
Nicole F
9:14 AM
OK, I might have decided to liberate it. Someone like her doesn’t deserve a thing of such beauty.
PLEASE don’t tell your new boyfriend that I stole his sister’s Dalmatian statue.
Nicole F
9:17 AM
Ha, I guess he’s not your new boyfriend, right? He’s your new old boyfriend!
Anyway, way to go. He’s sooooo much better than the lumbersexual cheesemonger.
Aren’t you glad I told you to cliiiiiiiiiiiick that story in the Herald????
Mom
9:35 AM
Honey, I’m just so happy about you and Reed. You know I’ve always liked him so much.
Now, I know you two probably want to spend some time alone, but just in case you’re free for dinner, what’s his favorite food? Because I’ll make it. Is it chicken? Because I managed to get Rhonda Jenkins’s recipe for baked chicken and I was thinking of trying it out tonight.
Let me know. Bye now.
Reed
10:20 AM
What if I don’t want to go to lunch with your friend Leeanne? What if I just want to stay in your bed and ravage you instead?
Becky
10:20 AM
I think we’ve done enough ravaging of one another in my bed for one morning.
Reed
10:20 AM
There can never be enough ravaging where you’re concerned.
Becky
10:20 AM
I haven’t seen her in months.
/> Reed
10:21 AM
I haven’t seen you in ten years.
Becky
10:21 AM