A languid roll of the already glazed eyeballs, a mere stir of black and white in the gathering dusk showed that the faithful messenger of princes was aware of the presence of the man who had been so long known to him and his people as the King of the Sea. Lingard knelt down close to Jaffir’s head, which rolled a little from side to side and then became still, staring at a beam of the upper deck. Lingard bent his ear to the dark lips. “Deliver your message” he said in a gentle tone.
“The Rajah wished to hold your hand once more,” whispered Jaffir so faintly that Lingard had to guess the words rather than hear them. “I was to tell you,” he went on — and stopped suddenly.
“What were you to tell me?”
“To forget everything,” said Jaffir with a loud effort as if beginning a long speech. After that he said nothing more till Lingard murmured, “And the lady Immada?”
Jaffir collected all his strength. “She hoped no more,” he uttered, distinctly. “The order came to her while she mourned, veiled, apart. I didn’t even see her face.”
Lingard swayed over the dying man so heavily that Wasub, standing near by, hastened to catch him by the shoulder. Jaffir seemed unaware of anything, and went on staring at the beam.
“Can you hear me, O Jaffir?” asked Lingard.
“I hear.”
“I never had the ring. Who could bring it to me?”
“We gave it to the white woman — may Jehannum be her lot!”
“No! It shall be my lot,” said Lingard with despairing force, while Wasub raised both his hands in dismay. “For, listen, Jaffir, if she had given the ring to me it would have been to one that was dumb, deaf, and robbed of all courage.”
It was impossible to say whether Jaffir had heard. He made no sound, there was no change in his awful stare, but his prone body moved under the cotton sheet as if to get further away from the white man. Lingard got up slowly and making a sign to Wasub to remain where he was, went up on deck without giving another glance to the dying man. Again it seemed to him that he was pacing the quarter-deck of a deserted ship. The mulatto steward, watching through the crack of the pantry door, saw the Captain stagger into the cuddy and fling-to the door behind him with a crash. For more than an hour nobody approached that closed door till Carter coming down the companion stairs spoke without attempting to open it.
“Are you there, sir?” The answer, “You may come in,” comforted the young man by its strong resonance. He went in.
“Well?”
“Jaffir is dead. This moment. I thought you would want to know.”
Lingard looked persistently at Carter, thinking that now Jaffir was dead there was no one left on the empty earth to speak to him a word of reproach; no one to know the greatness of his intentions, the bond of fidelity between him and Hassim and Immada, the depth of his affection for those people, the earnestness of his visions, and the unbounded trust that was his reward. By the mad scorn of Jorgenson flaming up against the life of men, all this was as if it had never been. It had become a secret locked up in his own breast forever.
“Tell Wasub to open one of the long-cloth bales in the hold, Mr. Carter, and give the crew a cotton sheet to bury him decently according to their faith. Let it be done to-night. They must have the boats, too. I suppose they will want to take him on the sandbank.”
“Yes, sir,” said Carter.
“Let them have what they want, spades, torches. . . . Wasub will chant the right words. Paradise is the lot of all True Believers. Do you understand me, Mr. Carter? Paradise! I wonder what it will be for him! Unless he gets messages to carry through the jungle, avoiding ambushes, swimming in storms and knowing no rest, he won’t like it.”
Carter listened with an unmoved face. It seemed to him that the Captain had forgotten his presence.
“And all the time he will be sleeping on that sandbank,” Lingard began again, sitting in his old place under the gilt thunderbolts suspended over his head with his elbows on the table and his hands to his temples. “If they want a board to set up at the grave let them have a piece of an oak plank. It will stay there — till the next monsoon. Perhaps.”
Carter felt uncomfortable before that tense stare which just missed him and in that confined cabin seemed awful in its piercing and far-off expression. But as he had not been dismissed he did not like to go away.
“Everything will be done as you wish it, sir,” he said. “I suppose the yacht will be leaving the first thing to-morrow morning, sir.”
“If she doesn’t we must give her a solid shot or two to liven her up — eh, Mr. Carter?”
Carter did not know whether to smile or to look horrified. In the end he did both, but as to saying anything he found it impossible. But Lingard did not expect an answer.
“I believe you are going to stay with me, Mr. Carter?”
“I told you, sir, I am your man if you want me.”
“The trouble is, Mr. Carter, that I am no longer the man to whom you spoke that night in Carimata.”
“Neither am I, sir, in a manner of speaking.”
Lingard, relaxing the tenseness of his stare, looked at the young man, thoughtfully.
“After all, it is the brig that will want you. She will never change. The finest craft afloat in these seas. She will carry me about as she did before, but . . .”
He unclasped his hands, made a sweeping gesture.
Carter gave all his naive sympathy to that man who had certainly rescued the white people but seemed to have lost his own soul in the attempt. Carter had heard something from Wasub. He had made out enough of this story from the old serang’s pidgin English to know that the Captain’s native friends, one of them a woman, had perished in a mysterious catastrophe. But the why of it, and how it came about, remained still quite incomprehensible to him. Of course, a man like the Captain would feel terribly cut up. . . .
“You will be soon yourself again, sir,” he said in the kindest possible tone.
With the same simplicity Lingard shook his head. He was thinking of the dead Jaffir with his last message delivered and untroubled now by all these matters of the earth. He had been ordered to tell him to forget everything. Lingard had an inward shudder. In the dismay of his heart he might have believed his brig to lie under the very wing of the Angel of Desolation — so oppressive, so final, and hopeless seemed the silence in which he and Carter looked at each other, wistfully.
Lingard reached for a sheet of paper amongst several lying on the table, took up a pen, hesitated a moment, and then wrote:
“Meet me at day-break on the sandbank.”
He addressed the envelope to Mrs. Travers, Yacht Hermit, and pushed it across the table.
“Send this on board the schooner at once, Mr. Carter. Wait a moment. When our boats shove off for the sandbank have the forecastle gun fired. I want to know when that dead man has left the ship.”
He sat alone, leaning his head on his hand, listening, listening endlessly, for the report of the gun. Would it never come? When it came at last muffled, distant, with a slight shock through the body of the brig he remained still with his head leaning on his hand but with a distinct conviction, with an almost physical certitude, that under the cotton sheet shrouding the dead man something of himself, too, had left the ship.
IX
In a roomy cabin, furnished and fitted with austere comfort, Mr. Travers reposed at ease in a low bed-place under a snowy white sheet and a light silk coverlet, his head sunk in a white pillow of extreme purity. A faint scent of lavender hung about the fresh linen. Though lying on his back like a person who is seriously ill Mr. Travers was conscious of nothing worse than a great fatigue. Mr. Travers’ restfulness had something faintly triumphant in it. To find himself again on board his yacht had soothed his vanity and had revived his sense of his own importance. He contemplated it in a distant perspective, restored to its proper surroundings and unaffected by an adventure too extraordinary to trouble a superior mind or even to remain in one’s memory for any length of time. He was
not responsible. Like many men ambitious of directing the affairs of a nation, Mr. Travers disliked the sense of responsibility. He would not have been above evading it in case of need, but with perverse loftiness he really, in his heart, scorned it. That was the reason why he was able to lie at rest and enjoy a sense of returning vigour. But he did not care much to talk as yet, and that was why the silence in the stateroom had lasted for hours. The bulkhead lamp had a green silk shade. It was unnecessary to admit for a moment the existence of impudence or ruffianism. A discreet knocking at the cabin door sounded deferential.
Mrs. Travers got up to see what was wanted, and returned without uttering a single word to the folding armchair by the side of the bed-place, with an envelope in her hand which she tore open in the greenish light. Mr. Travers remained incurious but his wife handed to him an unfolded sheet of paper which he condescended to hold up to his eyes. It contained only one line of writing. He let the paper fall on the coverlet and went on reposing as before. It was a sick man’s repose. Mrs. Travers in the armchair, with her hands on the arm-rests, had a great dignity of attitude.
“I intend to go,” she declared after a time.
“You intend to go,” repeated Mr. Travers in a feeble, deliberate voice. “Really, it doesn’t matter what you decide to do. All this is of so little importance. It seems to me that there can be no possible object.”
“Perhaps not,” she admitted. “But don’t you think that the uttermost farthing should always be paid?”
Mr. Travers’ head rolled over on the pillow and gave a covertly scared look at that outspoken woman. But it rolled back again at once and the whole man remained passive, the very embodiment of helpless exhaustion. Mrs. Travers noticed this, and had the unexpected impression that Mr. Travers was not so ill as he looked. “He’s making the most of it. It’s a matter of diplomacy,” she thought. She thought this without irony, bitterness, or disgust. Only her heart sank a little lower and she felt that she could not remain in the cabin with that man for the rest of the evening. For all life — yes! But not for that evening.
“It’s simply monstrous,” murmured the man, who was either very diplomatic or very exhausted, in a languid manner. “There is something abnormal in you.”
Mrs. Travers got up swiftly.
“One comes across monstrous things. But I assure you that of all the monsters that wait on what you would call a normal existence the one I dread most is tediousness. A merciless monster without teeth or claws. Impotent. Horrible!”
She left the stateroom, vanishing out of it with noiseless resolution. No power on earth could have kept her in there for another minute. On deck she found a moonless night with a velvety tepid feeling in the air, and in the sky a mass of blurred starlight, like the tarnished tinsel of a worn-out, very old, very tedious firmament. The usual routine of the yacht had been already resumed, the awnings had been stretched aft, a solitary round lamp had been hung as usual under the main boom. Out of the deep gloom behind it d’Alcacer, a long, loose figure, lounged in the dim light across the deck. D’Alcacer had got promptly in touch with the store of cigarettes he owed to the Governor General’s generosity. A large, pulsating spark glowed, illuminating redly the design of his lips under the fine dark moustache, the tip of his nose, his lean chin. D’Alcacer reproached himself for an unwonted light-heartedness which had somehow taken possession of him. He had not experienced that sort of feeling for years. Reprehensible as it was he did not want anything to disturb it. But as he could not run away openly from Mrs. Travers he advanced to meet her.
“I do hope you have nothing to tell me,” he said with whimsical earnestness.
“I? No! Have you?”
He assured her he had not, and proffered a request. “Don’t let us tell each other anything, Mrs. Travers. Don’t let us think of anything. I believe it will be the best way to get over the evening.” There was real anxiety in his jesting tone.
“Very well,” Mrs. Travers assented, seriously. “But in that case we had better not remain together.” She asked, then, d’Alcacer to go below and sit with Mr. Travers who didn’t like to be left alone. “Though he, too, doesn’t seem to want to be told anything,” she added, parenthetically, and went on: “But I must ask you something else, Mr. d’Alcacer. I propose to sit down in this chair and go to sleep — if I can. Will you promise to call me about five o’clock? I prefer not to speak to any one on deck, and, moreover, I can trust you.”
He bowed in silence and went away slowly. Mrs. Travers, turning her head, perceived a steady light at the brig’s yard-arm, very bright among the tarnished stars. She walked aft and looked over the taffrail. It was exactly like that other night. She half expected to hear presently the low, rippling sound of an advancing boat. But the universe remained without a sound. When she at last dropped into the deck chair she was absolutely at the end of her power of thinking. “I suppose that’s how the condemned manage to get some sleep on the night before the execution,” she said to herself a moment before her eyelids closed as if under a leaden hand.
She woke up, with her face wet with tears, out of a vivid dream of Lingard in chain-mail armour and vaguely recalling a Crusader, but bare-headed and walking away from her in the depths of an impossible landscape. She hurried on to catch up with him but a throng of barbarians with enormous turbans came between them at the last moment and she lost sight of him forever in the flurry of a ghastly sand-storm. What frightened her most was that she had not been able to see his face. It was then that she began to cry over her hard fate. When she woke up the tears were still rolling down her cheeks and she perceived in the light of the deck-lamp d’Alcacer arrested a little way off.
“Did you have to speak to me?” she asked.
“No,” said d’Alcacer. “You didn’t give me time. When I came as far as this I fancied I heard you sobbing. It must have been a delusion.”
“Oh, no. My face is wet yet. It was a dream. I suppose it is five o’clock. Thank you for being so punctual. I have something to do before sunrise.”
D’Alcacer moved nearer. “I know. You have decided to keep an appointment on the sandbank. Your husband didn’t utter twenty words in all these hours but he managed to tell me that piece of news.”
“I shouldn’t have thought,” she murmured, vaguely.
“He wanted me to understand that it had no importance,” stated d’Alcacer in a very serious tone.
“Yes. He knows what he is talking about,” said Mrs. Travers in such a bitter tone as to disconcert d’Alcacer for a moment. “I don’t see a single soul about the decks,” Mrs. Travers continued, almost directly.
“The very watchmen are asleep,” said d’Alcacer.
“There is nothing secret in this expedition, but I prefer not to call any one. Perhaps you wouldn’t mind pulling me off yourself in our small boat.”
It seemed to her that d’Alcacer showed some hesitation. She added: “It has no importance, you know.”
He bowed his assent and preceded her down the side in silence. When she entered the boat he had the sculls ready and directly she sat down he shoved off. It was so dark yet that but for the brig’s yard-arm light he could not have kept his direction. He pulled a very deliberate stroke, looking over his shoulder frequently. It was Mrs. Travers who saw first the faint gleam of the uncovered sandspit on the black, quiet water.
“A little more to the left,” she said. “No, the other way. . . .” D’Alcacer obeyed her directions but his stroke grew even slower than before. She spoke again. “Don’t you think that the uttermost farthing should always be paid, Mr. d’Alcacer?”
D’Alcacer glanced over his shoulder, then: “It would be the only honourable way. But it may be hard. Too hard for our common fearful hearts.”
“I am prepared for anything.”
He ceased pulling for a moment . . . “Anything that may be found on a sandbank,” Mrs. Travers went on. “On an arid, insignificant, and deserted sandbank.”
D’Alcacer gave two strokes and ceas
ed again.
“There is room for a whole world of suffering on a sandbank, for all the bitterness and resentment a human soul may be made to feel.”
“Yes, I suppose you would know,” she whispered while he gave a stroke or two and again glanced over his shoulder. She murmured the words:
“Bitterness, resentment,” and a moment afterward became aware of the keel of the boat running up on the sand. But she didn’t move, and d’Alcacer, too, remained seated on the thwart with the blades of his sculls raised as if ready to drop them and back the dinghy out into deep water at the first sign.
Mrs. Travers made no sign, but she asked, abruptly: “Mr. d’Alcacer, do you think I shall ever come back?”
Her tone seemed to him to lack sincerity. But who could tell what this abruptness covered — sincere fear or mere vanity? He asked himself whether she was playing a part for his benefit, or only for herself.
“I don’t think you quite understand the situation, Mrs. Travers. I don’t think you have a clear idea, either of his simplicity or of his visionary’s pride.”
She thought, contemptuously, that there were other things which d’Alcacer didn’t know and surrendered to a sudden temptation to enlighten him a little.
“You forget his capacity for passion and that his simplicity doesn’t know its own strength.”
There was no mistaking the sincerity of that murmur. “She has felt it,” d’Alcacer said to himself with absolute certitude. He wondered when, where, how, on what occasion? Mrs. Travers stood up in the stern sheets suddenly and d’Alcacer leaped on the sand to help her out of the boat.
“Hadn’t I better hang about here to take you back again?” he suggested, as he let go her hand.
Complete Works of Joseph Conrad (Illustrated) Page 459