“I hope you don’t plan to send another poor schmuck to get the crap kicked out of him.”
His incredulous stare caused Ryan to look away. He didn’t understand what was happening, so how could he explain it to Simmo.
“I was thinking of letting her go.”
“Excuse me?” Simmo’s dark eyes showed his confusion.
“It’s obvious they have little interest in negotiating with us.”
“They might change their mind if they see how serious we are.”
Ryan shrugged as he headed to one of the small drink fridges, and grabbed two cans of soft drink. This fridge, like all appliances requiring electricity, was run by the local power station. They’d tapped into the supply, so it became like everything else, stolen. They had backup generators powered by fuel just in case. Something else they acquired while on scavenges was fuel. Old, used machinery, furniture, fuel and food, anything they could get their hands on, which wasn’t much. Ryan hated the fact they had to rob trucks and ransack stores to survive, but if they didn’t they would starve.
“Come on, man, think about this logically,” Simmo continued as he walked beside Ryan, who headed out of the dining hall. “Where are you going?”
“To take the food to Mackenzie.”
“Aren’t you going to eat yours first? Cold food won’t hurt her.”
“No, I’ll eat mine in my room.”
“I’ll take the food to her then. I haven’t had a chance to get a good look at her yet. She looked okay last night.”
“No, I’ll do it.”
Simmo grabbed his arm to halt him. “What are you hiding?”
Yanking his arm from Simmo’s grip, Ryan didn’t answer and kept walking. He knew full well that Simmo wouldn’t let it go.
“You can’t trust her. I don’t care how pretty she is. Don’t let her fool you, man, she’s an Edwards. Cody is the worst person I have ever had the unfortunate pleasure of meeting.”
“I know what kind of man he is, Simmo.”
“Something’s up with you.” Simmo trod along beside him in silence for a moment. When Ryan wouldn’t respond he gave a warning. “Be careful.”
Ryan ignored him. With a swift turn, Simmo headed back towards the dining hall. Tray in hand, Ryan weaved his way through the tunnels to his quarters without further encounters, and unbolted his door. He didn’t want, or know, how to explain Mackenzie’s presence in his rooms.
He entered to find the girl causing his confusion curled up asleep on his couch. Cuddling one of his pillows to her face, which appeared puffy as though she’d been crying, she looked even sweeter than before. Her innocence shone through more than ever. He pushed Simmo’s words from his mind and cursed himself for unloading his story on her. For telling her what a despicable human being her brother was and furthermore, for allowing her into his private world.
After placing the tray on the table, he knelt beside her and allowed himself to gaze at her for a moment. Her small, full and slightly parted mouth sent what he now recognised as desire to rise up and fog his already puzzled thoughts. A stray curl hung over her cheek. He brushed it away with a finger. Unfamiliar emotions filled his chest and an impulse to protect her, kiss her and hold her, almost won out. A strong resolve and self-control stopped him.
“Mackenzie.” Her eyelids fluttered. “Mackenzie.”
Her eyes flickered opened and gazed into his as she tried to wake up. She stretched before rubbing her eyes and sitting up.
“That’s the first time you’ve addressed me by my name,” she said, her voice still thick with sleep.
“I didn’t want to scare you by shaking you.”
“I’m sorry. I was really tired.”
“Are you hungry? I didn’t know what you would like so I got a few different things. It isn’t much. If you want something else, I can see what I can find.” He groaned internally; could he ramble anymore?
“It looks great, thanks.” She picked up her plate and began to eat.
He opened her drink. What am I doing? What is she doing to me?
They ate in silence for several moments. He was grateful for the distraction. Ryan was acutely conscience of how close they sat on the couch and how their knees brushed ever so slightly. How long would he be able to keep her around and control his yearning? At least he determined this was the word for what had overcome him. Everything she generated in him was more than he believed he could handle.
“I noticed you have fuelled lamps for lighting. Where do you get the fuel, and food and other things you need?”
“Why do you think we were aboveground last night?”
She shrugged.
“We only go up to the surface at night, so we can scavenge.”
“You mean steal?” There was no judgement in her tone.
“We wouldn’t survive if we didn’t.”
There was a pause and Ryan considered what to say or do when she broke the silence.
“My mum’s probably freaking out and Ryder … I hope Cody has told them I’m all right.”
“I would let you call them, but their phones are monitored. Then again maybe it would help. Let Edwards know how serious we are.”
“Serious?”
“I already told you I’m not going to hurt you, but from what you’ve told me, they don’t know that. Maybe they do, because it’s all lies anyway. That’s probably why they haven’t or won't negotiate with us.”
“I know you won’t hurt me.” She placed a hand on his arm. “I just wondered what you’re serious about.”
“Peace and freedom, Mackenzie.”
His skin beneath her fingers was warm. His pale arms a contradiction from the heat radiating from his body. How was it possible that this shy, thoughtful man could be capable of fighting and killing for freedom? His savage exterior surrounded a sweet soul.
He turned to her with a confused frown. “What is it about you that has me telling you everything about me?”
“The same thing that has me trusting you.” Her hand moved from his arm to his face. She traced a finger along the thin white scar running along his jaw. “How did you get this?”
“I don’t think you want me to answer that.”
“Cody?”
His reply was a short sharp nod as pain and the flash of a memory entered his eyes. Cody had a lot to answer for. She would welcome the chance to question him. This whole situation and turn of events was surreal. All this time she had lived with a savage, and the righteous man she thought Cody to be sat before her now instead, the man she’d been led to believe was her enemy. She now craved for him to be the opposite of an adversary.
“Maybe if I spoke to Cody, he might list—
“No, if he thinks you have any sympathy for me, for us … no I don’t want to test out the ties of blood. I don’t think it would matter to him who you were if you sided with us.”
“I don’t want you to send anyone else, so no one else comes back like your friend Troy.”
“I don’t want that either.”
“Then what?” Her hands itched to touch him again, but she couldn’t summon the courage.
“I’ll have to go instead.”
“No,” she blurted before she could stop herself.
The thought of him enduring more pain, or worse, his death, bothered her way too much.
“Mackenzie … I …” He stopped.
His hand lifted to play with her hair absent-mindedly. She remained still, waiting. His other hand came up to caress her cheek, his rough hands surprisingly gentle. His eyes dropped to her lips, so she closed her eyes.
When his lips sought hers, they were as gentle as his caress, and softer than they looked. The kiss was swift and innocent. She opened her eyes to seek more. He offered a bewildering gaze. She brought her hand to his face, encouraging him to bring his lips back to hers.
When he did, she intensified the kiss, discovering the sweetness of first kisses. His tongue sought hers as he eased her back onto the couch. She followed his
lead and touched her tongue to his, learning as she went. She wrapped her arms around his neck while he cradled her head and body with his arms. Her heart beat an erratic rhythm as he devoured her mouth, stealing her breath from her lungs.
His mouth left hers and she opened her eyes. The emotions coursing through her veins reflected in his eyes. One of his arms left her body to stroke her hair as the other held her close to him.
“What are we doing?” he said softly.
“I think the answer is obvious.”
“We shouldn’t be doing this. I … you’re so beautiful.”
Placing a hand on his face, she brought his lips back to hers, and he hungrily accepted the offering. A deep groan vibrated in his throat. He stopped again and sat up, bringing her with him.
“I … think I should … we …”
In one swift movement, he let her go and stood up, disappearing behind the curtain into the room she guessed to be his bedroom. He returned a moment later with a blanket and pillow.
“Here you go,” he said, offering her the bedding. She placed them beside her. “I’ll see you in the morning.”
Before she could reply he disappeared behind the curtain again and didn’t return.
She frowned. What was that all about?
Ryan flopped onto his bed, and stared at the moonlight through the skylight, his emotions and mind in turmoil. Why did his first kiss end up being with a citizen? The very people he loathed.
At twenty-four, he’d yet to experience any of the normal adolescent adventures. The opportunity to share a first kiss was taken away just after his sixteenth birthday, when the government came into power and schools became segregated and were no longer co-ed. Everything from that moment on became about protesting against the new regime. School boy crushes and girls weren’t an option.
Then a year later, he was an orphan at seventeen. For the past seven years, war and survival were all he knew. First kisses and sexual encounters weren’t even a consideration.
Of course he’d thought about it a lot over the years, it was natural, but neither the opportunity nor the inclination ever presented itself, until now. He was a man with the usual male needs, but these desires had to remain at the bottom of his priority list.
The irony was, Mackenzie, at first, had thought him to be a savage, one who took what he wanted from women, when in fact he’d never touched a girl, much less kissed one. Yet, moments ago, he’d indulged in his first kiss with a citizen of all people! There were many beautiful girls in the compound, but none had captivated him as she did.
He kicked himself for being so foolhardy. Simmo’s words floated around his head. Had he fallen for her charms? Was it all an act? Perhaps she was as cunning as her brother and he’d simply plummeted, eyes closed, into her trap.
His heart ached at times such as these. He yearned for his family, someone to help ease his confusion, and talk through his problems. Throwing an arm over his eyes, he tried to block out the moonlight and her pretty face.
10
Warning
After waking, Mackenzie took a quick peek behind the bedroom curtain and found it empty. She showered and changed into the fresh clothes he’d left in the bathroom. Seizing the opportunity to snoop, she went into the bedroom of the man who’d made her sleep restless, the subject of her newfound affection.
After leaving her confused the previous evening, she couldn’t stop thinking about him sleeping a few paces away. Mackenzie discovered she wished to know more about him and thus she decided to nose around. The ferocity of her feelings also astounded her and, for the first time ever, she pondered the reality of love at first sight. She’d always considered this a ridiculous notion. How could you love someone instantly? Instant attraction was most definitely real.
His bedroom contained a neatly made bed; a small hand constructed bedside table and a large cupboard with four doors. Knowing it was wrong to pry, she opened the doors one by one to find clothes, mostly his, she presumed, and more of what she guessed to be his sister’s clothes.
She wandered towards the small table similar to the one in the living area, housing a lamp, to find a worn-out book, probably from numerous reads. The title of her favourite classic novel stared back at her. She smiled, they had something in common.
Mackenzie loved reading books, actual paperbacks. Although she could read books on her comp-phone, listen to audio versions and music, she still preferred the real thing. The musty smell, the act of turning pages, and being able to take one everywhere without worrying about theft, kept her love for real books alive. She enjoyed a few of the modern day inventions, but an electronic version of books wasn’t one of them. Paperbacks were like paradise to her. New stories weren’t even printed anymore and finding a copy of older books - which also had been converted to electronic downloads - was rare.
Excited to see whether the rest of his collection suited her taste, she went back into the other room to find Ryan standing just inside the door.
Heat flushed her cheeks. Feeling guilty at having been caught, she lowered her eyes. His intense stare was too much for her. Breakfast sat on a tray in his hands. His face was a fortress of indecipherable expression.
“Oops, you caught me,” she said. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have gone in there.”
“What were you looking for?”
“Oh, nothing, just being nosey.” Heat rose in her cheeks again.
His face softened a little, but his eyes remained wary. She walked over to him, took the tray from his arms, and placed it on the table.
“You’re not eating?”
“I ate in the dining room.”
Carrying her bowl of cereal, she strolled over to the bookcase spanning one wall and perused the books on the shelves. Many of the titles were recognisable to her as she’d read them. There were also quite a few she’d either never heard of or hadn’t gotten around to reading. Being confined within the fortification that was home gave her a lot of time to indulge in her favourite pastime.
“You have a lot of great books. I guess you have a lot of time to read. At least I’ll have something to do while I’m here.”
She attempted to keep her voice light. His silence and brooding stare were bewildering. After finishing her cereal, she placed her bowl on the tray, and added milk and sugar to her coffee.
“Will you say something, please?” she asked.
“What do you want me to say?” His voice also sounded wary.
“I don’t know.”
“Stay out of my room.” This tone required no interpretation.
“I will. I’m sorry.”
For something to do, she sipped her coffee to avoid his gaze. It burnt her tongue, so she put it down again. All the while he said nothing, just stared in that unwavering way that made her skin tingle and left her wondering what to say. Determined to lighten his dark mood, Mackenzie continued despite her awkwardness.
“What do you do?”
“Do?”
“Like with your day. I used to work at Gov-Com where I monitored communication. I wondered what you do instead.”
“Watch duty, training, target practice, reading communication monitored by our techs and other … things.”
“Oh, sounds interesting. What’s the other things?
“Do you always ask so many questions?”
“No.”
“Then why ask me? So you can report it back to your brother?”
His sharp retort caused her to gasp. Gone was the tender man she’d kissed the night before. “What? No! Your staring is making me nervous. I tend to talk a lot when I’m uncomfortable.”
“I’m on watch duty this morning. Can I trust you?’
“Yes.”
Why was he acting so weird? Did she imagine last night?
“I’ll be back in a few hours.” He turned to leave.
“Ryan.”
“Yeah.” His expression remained cautious.
“Will I have to stay in here?”
“You can go s
ub level if you prefer.”
What is it with him? “Did I imagine it?”
His only response was to stare before his brow furrowed.
“I don’t regret you being my first. I know I’m not supposed to feel whatever it is I’m feeling, but I can’t control it.” Her words spilled out like a verbal waterfall.
“First?” He lifted a brow and his mouth twitched.
“Yes, I’ve never kissed anyone before. I know it’s lame. I’m twenty-three years old and never been kissed. I was fifteen when it all started and I wasn’t allowed to leave the house once the war began, so dating really hasn't been an option for me, unless of course I want to date one of the troops, which doesn’t interest me.” Stop rambling, Mac.
Beneath hooded eyes, he continued to gaze intently, and a small half smile showed his amusement.
“I’m glad you find my lack of experience so amusing.”
After closing the gap between them with three long strides, he slipped an arm around her waist, and drew her in close.
“You don’t know the half of it,” he said in a low deep voice.
His face came down so close to hers she could feel his breath on her cheek. Using a finger beneath her chin, he raised her face to meet his. Soft lips brushed hers as his hands came up to become buried in her hair. He nibbled on her bottom lip for several teasing, endless moments, before his tongue teased first her top then her bottom lip.
In one swift motion, he lifted her up off her feet, and deepened the kiss. Passion-fuelled tongues and lips sought release as they consumed each other. She groaned before winding her fingers through his long wavy locks.
As quickly as he started, he stopped, and placed her feet back on the floor.
“I’ve gotta go. I’ll be back later with lunch.”
“About time you got here,” Simmo grumbled as Ryan entered the bunker.
“I got held up.”
“I bet you did.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?” Ryan sat on the chair beside Simmo, and tried to keep his face indifferent.
“Where’s the girl?”
Simmo turned to study his face. He seemed more determined than normal to uncover the truth. It would be difficult to continue to hide it from him. Simmo could be like a dog with a bone.
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