Silence for a good ten seconds. “Kara,” he said, voice thick and hoarse. “I’m okay.”
“You’re such a liar. Where are you?”
“By the lake.” Each word came through as though a huge challenge to speak. “Park in the Worms and Perms lot,” he managed. “West about a hundred yards, then walk in toward the lake. I . . . can’t come to you.”
I looked over at Bryce. “We’re heading for the bait shop on Lakeshore Drive. You know the one?” He nodded and I returned my attention to Zack. “We’ll be there in five minutes, and no, I’m not hanging up.”
The line remained silent, and I had the distinct impression that Zack was gathering enough energy simply to speak. “What happened after I left?” he asked after about half a minute. “I know . . . the qaztahl are all gone, but I can’t sense like I should.”
I did my best to fill him in as we headed his way. The conversation remained fairly one-sided, but I had the sense it helped him simply to hear me talk. I caught him up on the various details, and did my best to ease his deep concern for Szerain/Ryan by relating my theory that he’d used the node to stabilize himself.
The car lurched as Bryce pulled into the empty rutted gravel lot of Bubba and Barb’s Worms and Perms, a mom and pop beauty salon and bait shop that had been a lake fixture for almost forty years. It had been rebuilt after Hurricane Katrina, but already had a dilapidated air about it. A single floodlight illuminated the shabby, faded blue building with BEAUTY SUPPLIES, LIVE BAIT and GET WORMS HERE painted on the side. I wasn’t too sure about the selling point of the last one, or the whole concept for that matter, but the place did a thriving business so what the hell did I know?
Bryce parked in the shadow of the building. I climbed out of the car and wrinkled my nose at the smell of the minnow tanks inside and ripe fish guts in the trash. “Zack told me he was a hundred yards that way then straight in toward the lake,” I said. “Bryce, stay with the car and keep your phone handy, please. Sonny, I need you with me.”
Sonny gave me a perplexed look. “Anything you say, but why me?”
“He sounded pretty strung out on the phone,” I told him, then smiled. “I think your ‘chill out’ knack might be handy.”
Comprehension bloomed on his face, along with gratification. I wondered how long it had been since he’d been able to use his ability for good.
“Also,” I continued, “he said he’s not sure if he can walk or not, and I sure as hell don’t want to try and carry him.”
Sonny let out a soft laugh. “I can handle that.”
We left Bryce and made our way through tall grass, swarms of mosquitos, and questionable footing. “Couldn’t he have blipped to a place with a trail?” I grumbled, then lifted the phone to my ear. “Hey, Zack? We should be getting close. Do you hear a herd of elephants nearby?”
“Rhinos,” he replied. “Definitely . . . rhinos, and they need to bear right . . . make their way around the curve.”
We continued to follow his directions and finally found him on a flat spit of stone that extended into the water. He lay curled on his side, his phone on speaker beside him.
I tucked my own phone away. The clouds were gone and the rising moon cast everything in soft light. A fat toad hopped across my path as I moved to Zack and knelt beside him. “I’m here, ghastuk,” I said softly, the demon word for friend coming up naturally.
“You’re right, I lied,” he said. “I’m a wreck.” He made what I suspected to be an attempt to sit up but ended up as little more than a body jerk.
I laid my hand on Zack’s shoulder, caught Sonny’s eye, and silently beckoned him to us. “No shit. But it’s going to be all right.”
Sonny moved in quickly, helped me get Zack sitting cross-legged, then withdrew a few feet, watchful. Zack scrabbled for my hand, found it, and hung on.
“It’s not all right,” he said. “It’s not.” The desolation in his voice matched the despair in his eyes. “There is only silence. Silence,” he said in a heart-wrenching whisper.
“We’re going to help you,” I told him. “That’s something you can hang on to.” The reminder of Mzatal’s silence and imposed distance twisted like a knife in my heart, but I swallowed the temptation to sink into my own pain and focused on Zack. I kept hold of his hand and wrapped my other arm around his shoulders. “Tell me what’s going on with you so I know how to help.”
“Isolated.” His voice lurched as though the word forced its way through suffocating grief. “Crippled.”
I gestured Sonny closer. He moved forward until he was only about a foot away. Zack took a deeper breath and eased his grip on my hand, and I hoped that meant Sonny was having a positive effect on him.
“All right, you’re isolated from the other demahnk,” I said, doing my best to understand. “It’s some sort of telepathic link that’s silent now?”
“From Rhyzkahl as well,” Zack said, expression bleak, but then he shook his head. “Not telepathic. Different. You . . . understand.”
I frowned, puzzled. “I do? How?” I thought for a moment. “You mean with Mzatal?”
“Similar.”
“Oh.” Now I had a far better understanding of the magnitude of his loss. Mzatal had built a wall but he hadn’t cut our connection. When I followed the silence, he was still there. Not so for Zack. And it hadn’t been just one connection. He’d lost them all simultaneously. Pain sliced through me in sympathy.
“How are you crippled?” I asked. Maybe knowing the specifics would help me help him.
“Cannot sense properly,” Zack said. “Cannot feel. Cannot travel. I managed to get here, but no more.” His voice broke, and he trembled softly. “Cannot flow. Cannot extend. Bound to human flesh.”
I had no idea what flowing or extending meant, but now wasn’t the time to ask. Wrapping my arms around him, I held him close. He clung to me like a drowning man to a life preserver, and then gave in to his sorrow. He wept in big shuddering sobs that shook us both, and grief and loss as powerful as the aura of a qaztahl washed over me. I wept with him, held him, and did as much as I could to let him know I was there for him.
After a time, he eased and went still in my arms. I continued to cradle his head to my shoulder and stroke his hair. Sonny knelt on one knee behind Zack, face serious and focused and full of genuine concern. Zack sucked in a shaky breath and pushed himself to sit straight again, lifted his hand, and brushed my cheek with his fingertips in a gesture of gratitude far deeper than words.
“Do you need Jill?” I asked softly.
He drew in a sharp breath and stiffened, eyes reflecting panic. “No! No, I can’t,” he said emphatically. “It’s not her. I just can’t.”
“It’s okay. I understand,” I hurried to assure him, then considered the situation. “You need time. You need to feel safe. And you don’t need to be alone. But you need to be with someone . . . neutral.”
“Yes. I’m so sorry.” The words came out in a pained whisper, and the veil slid from another level of understanding. Zack was accustomed to being the caretaker and guardian, the elder and advisor. He was the one with vision and understanding. Yet, for the moment, he couldn’t serve in any of those roles, and instead was the one who needed care. The whole mess surely made for a confusing and heavy burden.
“No need to be sorry, Zack,” I said. “You went through a major trauma. I needed a few days away from it all not too long ago.” If Helori hadn’t accompanied me to the wilds of the demon realm for a timeout after Rhyzkahl tortured me, I never would have recovered. “How about Jill’s house?” I suggested. “It’s already warded, and she’s at our place with Steeev which means you’d have it to yourself.”
A flicker of relief passed through his eyes. “Yes.” He swallowed, gave an unsteady nod. “Yes, that’s good.”
“After we get you settled, I’ll call her and let her know what’s going on. She’ll unders
tand.” I had faith in my friend. “I also think Sonny should stay with you.”
Zack looked at me with naked hope in his eyes. “Will he?”
That response alone told me I’d made a good call. I looked over at Sonny. “Zack could use your company for a little while. You cool with that?”
Pleased relief lit his face. “Sure thing. Whatever you need.”
“Great. It’ll be good for you as well,” I said. “In fact, it’s probably best for both of you to simply trust me, go along with everything I say, and not argue.”
Zack managed a weak smile. “Opportunistic dictatress.”
“That’s Stubborn Opinionated Bitch,” I corrected. “Come on. Let’s get out of here. The mosquitoes are vicious.”
Zack made a failed attempt to stand. “I don’t know that I can walk.”
Sonny moved close, drew Zack’s arm across his shoulders, pulled Zack up with him as he straightened. “You don’t have to, Agent Garner. I’ve got you.”
I ducked under Zack’s other arm and wrapped my arm around his waist. Getting back to the car was a lot harder than going in, but we eventually got Zack tucked into the backseat with Sonny.
I quickly filled Bryce in and told him where to go. Zack slumped against the door with his eyes closed, while Sonny fidgeted and exuded calm all at the same time. Bryce brooded in silence, no doubt worried about Paul, and I remained quiet as well, thoughts and questions about Mzatal, Vsuhl, Pyrenth, and my own identity issues whirling and colliding within me.
Trampled grass in Jill’s yard remained the only indication there’d been a crime scene only a few days ago. Bryce pulled into the driveway and parked, then Sonny helped Zack into the house to get him settled on the sofa. Bryce got out of the car, leaned on the hood and looked up at the sky. I started to ask him if he was okay but caught myself before the dumb question slipped out. Instead, I laid my hand on his arm, gave it a squeeze, then turned and headed into the house.
I checked the kitchen for supplies, relieved to find plenty of food in the pantry and fridge. Sonny quickly explored the small house to get a feel for the layout. Zack sat hunched on the sofa with a pillow hugged to his chest, looking confused and lost. I’d promised him everything would be all right, but what if I was wrong? Could he recover from such a deep trauma?
I knew a little about trauma, and I remembered how awesome it felt to wade into the sea after my torture ordeal. Though a bath was a far cry from the ocean, it held plenty of merits of its own. I went into the bathroom and cranked the water on full in the tub, then hunted in Jill’s closet and found Zack a set of his own sweats. A scrounge under the bathroom sink turned up some simple herbal sea salt, and I tossed a handful into the steaming bath, glad that Jill had something not too perfumey.
I returned to the living room, stooped, and slid Zack’s arm over my shoulder. “C’mon, demon-dude. I have something for you.”
He didn’t resist as I helped him to his feet, and we made it to the bathroom without either of us falling over. Zack looked at the filling tub as he steadied himself with a hand on the counter. “That bad, huh?” he asked with a flicker of a smile.
I smiled. “You have grass in your hair, and you’ve been downwind from a bait shop. Now strip and get in.”
He pulled his clothing off and let it drop to the floor. Once he was in the tub, I shut the water off, knelt on the bathroom rug, and proceeded to gently bathe him, as if caring for a child. I had the unshakable sense he needed simple nurturing and physical contact. And judging by the way he relaxed into it, my sense seemed to be right on target.
Zack closed his eyes, leaned back. I took my time, often simply soaking the sponge, then squeezing the water out over his torso. Once I’d cleaned all the decent parts, I set the sponge on the side of the tub. “I’m gonna let you scrub your balls, ’kay?”
“You’re such a chicken,” he murmured and cracked one eye open at me.
“Cluck cluck,” I shot back with a smile. “There’s a big fluffy towel and your sweats right here. Soak for a bit and then holler if you need help getting out.”
He opened his eyes fully, found mine. I felt a whisper of his mental touch, and then a gentle caress of my essence along with a flood of love and gratitude.
My throat clogged, and I had to wipe tears from my eyes. I laid my hand on his forearm, squeezed lightly. “Take your time,” I said, voice rough. “We’re here for you.”
I left him in the bath and returned to the living room. After about ten minutes he emerged under his own power—which was an improvement—though he remained unsteady on his feet and disturbingly pale.
Hiding my worry as much as possible, I guided him to the sofa, sat beside him. “I’ll let Jill know the gist of what’s going on with you,” I told him. “We’ll all take care of Szerain and make sure he spends time on the mini-nexus until you come home. Sonny will call if you need me for anything, all right?”
A smile struggled to his lips. “Yeah. Thanks.”
I gave him a hug. “I’m so sorry it turned out like this for you.”
He held me close, then surprised me by gently kissing my cheek. “Some things are worth the price you have to pay.”
I returned the gesture then left him with Sonny. Deep resolve formed in my gut as I returned to the car and Bryce. Zack had sacrificed himself to save us all in a moment of crisis—and possibly in the greater battle as well.
I intended to extract a price from the ones who’d made it necessary.
Chapter 42
As soon as Bryce and I were on the road again, I left a message on Ryan’s phone to let him know we’d found Zack but that he needed time alone and was staying at Jill’s. The next call was tougher since the first thing Jill wanted to do was go to Zack. It took a bit of finesse and a lot of stubborn bitchiness to convince her, but she finally gave in and grudgingly accepted it as some sort of demon thing.
With that done, I let my gaze drift out the window. The moon floated high in a sky empty of clouds. I rubbed at my eyes as the fatigue I’d held at bay with adrenaline-charged action wormed its way in. Hard to believe that first meeting with Sonny had been less than twelve hours earlier. And then I’d become Amaryllis for a while, and then . . .
I rubbed my eyes again. Who had I been after Amaryllis?
“Kara!” Bryce said sharply.
I jerked and swallowed. Remembered. “Thanks.”
“You’re exhausted,” he said, voice laden with worry. “You should catch a nap while I drive.”
He was probably right, but I wasn’t ready. “Not yet.” I rolled my neck on my shoulders, felt things pop. “I can’t call it quits until Ryan’s home, or I’ve at least heard from him. Gotta account for everyone in the posse, y’know?”
Bryce frowned but nodded, then drove in silence for a time before speaking again. “I don’t think he was breathing.”
It took me a few seconds to figure out what he meant. “Mzatal wouldn’t have taken Paul to the demon realm if there was no hope,” I told him. “And you know better than anyone that he can work healing miracles.”
A subtle layer of tension eased in his face. “Right. Sure, that makes sense.”
“It’s going to be all right,” I reassured him, while I tried to convince myself as well. My phone rang with Ryan’s caller ID, and I quickly answered. “Hey, you.”
“I got your message, and I’m on my way home,” Ryan said. “Everything’s taken care of with Angela Palatino. Where are you now?”
“Turning off Serenity Road. Should be home in less than a minute.”
“About ten for me. You doing okay?”
“Yeah,” I lied. “Good as can be expected. You?”
“I feel a little weird, like my brain is too big for my head,” he said, “but otherwise I’m good.”
“We can chill together when you get home. We’re at the driveway now.”
“Deal,” he said. “See you in a bit.”
I stuffed my phone into my pocket as Bryce parked, climbed out of the car, and then stopped and looked at the house. The new floodlights under the eaves cast warm pools of amber while also throwing odd shadows onto the porch. The swing creaked gently in the soft breeze, and water dripped from the gutter spouts. Light shone through the front windows, and I wondered if the owners were home.
My hands clenched at my sides. No, it’s my house. MY house. I fought my way back up the slippery slope. Kara’s house. And I’m Kara. It only seemed unfamiliar because of all the changes. But can it change so much and still be mine? I found myself wondering.
“Kara.” Bryce touched my arm, and I startled, blinked. Concern puckered his forehead. “Kara, you really need to get to bed,” he said. “Like, right now.”
“Sure,” I said. Yet I wasn’t convinced sleep could fix it. Who would I wake up as?
I walked up the steps, hesitated before opening the door. Gritting my teeth, I silenced the voice that told me I should knock first, then turned the knob and entered. I dropped my stuff on the table by the door—because it was my house, and I could do that—went to my bedroom and flipped on the light.
Fuzzykins lay curled on my bed. Blinking in the sudden light, she lifted her head and hissed at me. I started to hiss right back at her, then saw the little squiggling lumps. In the middle of my bed.
“You . . . you horrible beast!” I yelled. Bryce burst in behind me, clearly ready to deal with a demon or something worse.
He followed my gaze, then exhaled in relief. “Shit, it’s just Fuzzykins,”
“It’s my bed,” I gritted out. “She had her damn kittens in my bed! Eilahn bought her a ridiculously expensive cat bed, but no, she had to drop her spawn on my comforter!”
Bryce moved forward to peer at the lumps. “She sure did.” A smile spread across his face as the cat mrowred up at him, but he wiped it away when he looked back at me. “Want to crash in the guest room for now, and I’ll, uh, move them or something?”
Fury of the Demon (Kara Gillian) Page 48