Discover Your Strengths
“Do not try to teach a pig to sing. It wastes your time and annoys the pig.”
– Robert Heinlein, Science Fiction Writer
The first pillar of career satisfaction is using your natural talents, or strengths, daily in your work.
Have you ever been in a job where you felt you were trying to fit a square peg into a round hole, and every day felt like an uphill climb? Or maybe you felt completely bored and unchallenged. When we’re either struggling or stagnant, chances are good we’re not using our natural strengths at work.
Suzanne wasn’t.
When I met Suzanne, she explained she was miserable in her accounting job. Every day, and with every spreadsheet, she felt like she was dying a little bit more inside. Suzanne was an imaginative people person. She possessed deep empathy and was positive and encouraging. She was flexible and easy to get along with. She loved taking each day as it came and described the joy she felt in the fun and unexpected surprises life held when she allowed each day to unfold naturally. She loved to write poetry and fiction. Her accounting role, or the culture in which she was performing that role, didn’t tap into these elements of Suzanne’s strengths, personality, and interests.
When Suzanne was in high school, she submitted one of her stories to a writing contest sponsored by the local newspaper and won first place. Writing made her feel alive and enthusiastic. When she was graduated from high school, her parents thought her writing ambitions were childhood silliness and they told her they would pay for an education only in accounting or engineering. She picked what she considered the lesser of the two evils.
Suzanne’s story is not uncommon. Many of us are lured from gifting the world with our natural abilities in exchange for pursuing “sensible” career paths by well-meaning loved ones—or even by ourselves—leaving our natural abilities largely untapped. I find this profoundly sad.
Let’s get clear on what strengths are and are not. Your strengths are not the same as your skills. Skills are abilities you’ve learned, such as delegating, managing projects, giving presentations, supervising, multi-tasking, and negotiating.
Perhaps you’re skilled at negotiating but the natural talent, or strength, underlying your negotiation skills could be quickly building rapport with people or using persuasive communication skills. Both building rapport and persuasive communication have multiple applications apart from the skill of negotiation. One or more strengths contribute to an ability to perform a skill well.
The Clifton StrengthsFinder
My preferred tool to help people discover their natural talents is the Clifton StrengthsFinder assessment created by the late Donald O. Clifton. StrengthsFinder was renamed the Clifton StrengthsFinder in his honor several years after his death. The American Psychological Association has also honored Donald Clifton with its presidential commendation as the “Father of Strengths-Based Psychology.”
The Clifton StrengthsFinder was developed based on a forty year study by the Gallup Organization and is a language built around the thirty-four most common talents in humans. This assessment helps people discover and describe their natural talents, focusing on what’s right with them.
Only one in thirty-three million people share the same top five strengths, and strengths are stable over a lifetime. That’s not to say a person’s top five strengths won’t change. In fact, they often do. Everyone has more than five natural talents, and it’s possible for strengths to move into the top five from the top ten if a person has been investing in a talent.
For example, if Strategic is within your top ten strengths but not in the top five, then you move into a new role that is more strategic in nature, it’s possible for Strategic to move into your top five; while pushing another strength out of the top five.
If I could use only one assessment in my consulting practice, the Clifton StrengthsFinder would be it. Of all the assessments I’ve administered, and the thousands of client debriefs I’ve conducted, nothing elicits the reaction in people like this assessment.
I’ve had clients cry when I explain their strengths to them. Some react this way because they are emotionally overcome to learn the beauty and genius of talents they didn’t have words to describe until that moment. Others, because a lightbulb went on, shedding light on a significant source of career misery. Still others experienced hope for the first time in ages by realizing they do, in fact, have value—despite how they’ve been made to feel at work, often by an unsupportive manager.
A client named Lila wrote the following on LinkedIn after I debriefed her strengths:
“Kristin Sherry made me fall in love tonight. With myself. With my potential. Because, apparently, I am AWESOME and rare. So are you, but I digress.
I have these very specific strengths that play off of each other and allow me to really connect with people, bring them joy, help them to see what I see in them, and empower them with strategies to succeed. Kristin helped me identify the meaning of this set of strengths.
In one Gallup Strengths coaching session, Kristin Sherry brought me so much self-awareness and affirmation, shed light on exactly why some parts of my career feel better than others, and what I should be doing next.
I’ve now attached a .pdf of my personalized Gallup Strengths Report to my LinkedIn profile, which will allow future collaborators and clients to get to know why I am 1 in 33 million. That’s a real number. And it’s one in even more when you consider my personal context.
Let me tell you something—nothing will make you feel more empowered than knowing exactly what you bring to the table in a way that no one else can.”
Isn’t it a wonderful gift that a person can learn to appreciate themselves like this? Let’s go deeper so you can, too.
Strengths Themes
Each of the thirty-four strengths belongs in one of four theme categories. Not everyone has strengths in every category. Some people have strengths in two or three categories, for example. I’ve met a handful of people who have all five strengths in a single category.
The important thing to realize is there is no good or bad organization of your strengths. Instead, understanding where your strengths are themed reveals important insights about you.
The four strength categories are:
This chart shows each of the thirty-four strengths by theme category.
Following are detailed descriptions for each of the thirty-four strengths, by category. If you haven’t yet taken the Clifton StrengthsFinder assessment, try to identify which strengths you think might show up in your Top 5 based on the descriptions. If you have taken it, read the descriptions and see if you agree with how they describe you.
The Relating strengths explain how you build connections with others. Everyone who has one of these nine strengths enjoys building connections with people. However, those connections are created differently based on which strength the person is using. People with Relating themes prefer to work collaboratively with others, rather than independently. I have no relating themes, yet I connect with people. Not having relating themes does not mean you’re incapable of relating with people.
The following nine strengths are categorized as Relating themes:
Adaptability – You take things as they come. You can respond willingly to the demands of the moment; you don’t resent sudden requests or unforeseen detours. You stay productive when the demands pull you in many directions at once. You need variety in your work.
Descriptors: flexible, comfortable in times of change, easy to get along with, goes with the flow
Connectedness – You have faith in the links between all things. You believe there are few coincidences and almost every event has a reason. You are a bridge builder among people who share d
ifferences.
Descriptors: spiritual, “doesn’t sweat the small stuff,” strong faith, always looks at the big picture, helps others see purpose
Developer – You recognize and cultivate the potential in others. You see each small improvement. Your goal is to help others experience success. You look for ways to challenge others and devise interesting experiences that can stretch them and help them grow.
Descriptors: grows talent in others, teacher, coach, enjoys helping others succeed, invests in others
Empathy – You can sense the emotions of others, feel what they are feeling, see the world through their eyes. You hear unvoiced questions and anticipate their needs. For this reason, others are drawn to you.
Descriptors: creates trust, brings healing, knows just what to say/do, customizes approaches to others
Harmony – You look for consensus. Rather than conflict, you want agreement. You look for common ground, believing that imposing views on others wastes time. You steer clear of debate, preferring to talk about practical, down-to-earth matters on which everyone can agree.
Descriptors: negotiator, can see both sides of a situation, excellent at asking questions, able to arrive at consensus, great facilitator
Includer – You accept others, are aware when they feel left out, and make an effort to include them. You like to include as many people as possible. You cast few judgments, believing we are all important and fundamentally the same.
Descriptors: invites others in, caring, engages others, sensitive, takes up for others
Individualization – You are intrigued with the unique qualities of each person and have a gift for figuring out how people can work together productively. You focus on differences among people, seeing their strengths and drawing out the best in each person.
Descriptors: sees the uniqueness in all individuals, intuitively knows one size doesn’t fit all, appreciates the differences in others
Positivity – Your enthusiasm is contagious. You are upbeat and create excitement; people want to be around you because you lighten their spirits. You find ways to make everything more vital and inject drama into every project. You don’t always feel positive inside (You’re human!), but you desire to express positivity toward others. It’s important for people with this strength to avoid negative environments as it will feel toxic.
Descriptors: enthusiastic, lighthearted, energetic, generous with praise, optimistic
Relator – You enjoy close friendships with others, finding deep satisfaction working hard with friends to achieve a goal. For you, a relationship has value only if it is genuine. You want to understand others’ feelings, their goals, their fears and their dreams.
Descriptors: caring, trusting, a great friend, forgiving, generous
The Influencing strengths explain how you motivate or influence others to action. Again, not everyone will have strengths in this category. However, everyone who has one of these eight strengths can persuade or influence people in some way; their mode of persuasion and influence varies based on the specific influencing strength. People with Influencing themes are adept at accomplishing their goals through people.
It’s also important to be aware that people who do not have Influencing strengths in their Top 5 tend to dislike the responsibility of influencing and persuading people at work. I’ll talk more about this later.
Activator – You make things happen by turning thoughts into actions. Each day—365 days of the year—you must accomplish something meaningful. You believe that action is the best device for learning. You know you will be judged by what you get done—and it pleases you.
Descriptors: self-starter, fire starter, energy source, fearless
Command – You have presence. You can take control of a situation and make decisions. Once your goal is set, you feel restless until you have aligned others with you. Confrontation does not frighten you because you know it’s the first step to resolution.
Descriptors: charismatic, direct, driven, inspirational, easy to follow, clear, concise
Communication – You like to explain, describe, host, write, and speak in public. You generally find it easy to put thoughts into words. You are a good conversationalist and presenter. People like to listen to you. Your words pique their interest and inspire them to act.
Descriptors: storyteller, great presence, easy to talk to, energizer, entertaining, charismatic
Competition – You measure your progress against the performance of others. You strive to win and revel in contests. You like other competitors because they invigorate you. Although you are gracious to your fellow competitors, you compete to win. For you, losing is not an option.
Descriptors: driven, motivated, number one, measurement oriented, winner
Maximizer – You seek to transform something strong into something superb. Excellence, not average, is your measure. You don’t want to take something from below average to slightly above average when that same effort could make something good, great.
Descriptors: mastery, success, excellence, enjoys working with the best
Self-Assurance – You are confident in your abilities; your inner compass tells you you’re right. You know that your perspective is unique and distinct. No matter what the situation, you know the right decision. This theme lends you an aura of certainty.
Descriptors: self-confident, strong inner compass, risk taker
Significance – You want to be important in the eyes of others; you want to be recognized and heard, to stand out, to be known. You want to associate with others who are credible, professional, and you will push them to achieve until they are.
Descriptors: seeks outstanding performance, does things of importance, independent
WOO (Winning Others Over) – You love the challenge of meeting new people. You enjoy breaking the ice and making a connection with another person. In your world there are no strangers, just friends you haven’t met yet.
Descriptors: outgoing, people oriented, networker, rapport builder
Executing strengths explain what drives an individual toward results. However, the motivation behind results varies depending on which of these nine strengths an individual possesses. People with Executing strengths are Doers. If you don’t have any Executing strengths and find yourself in the role of an executer or implementer, that’s probably not very satisfying to you.
Achiever – You have a great deal of stamina and work hard. You take tremendous satisfaction from being busy and productive. Your drive is the power supply that causes you to set the pace and define productivity levels for others.
Descriptors: tireless, strong work ethic, leads by example, go-getter, hungry
Arranger – You can organize but also have flexibility that complements it. You like to figure out how all the pieces and resources can be arranged for maximum productivity. You try to figure out the best way to get things done. You can manage things as they move or change—you can manage chaos.
Descriptors: flexible, organizer, juggler, aligns and realigns tasks to find the most productive configuration possible, efficient, conductor
Belief – You have core values that are unchanging. Out of these values emerge a defined purpose for your life. Your friends call you dependable and easy to trust. Your work must mesh with your values.
Descriptors: passionate, steadfast, knows where he or she stands, altruistic, family oriented, ethical, responsible
Consistency (formerly called Fairness) – You are keenly aware of the need to treat people the same by setting up clear rules and adhering to them. In contrast to the world of special favors, you believe people function best in a consistent environment where everyone knows what is expected.
Descrip
tors: just, problem-solver, policy maker
Deliberative – You are best described by the serious care you take in making decisions or choices. You identify dangers, weigh their relative impact, and then plan accordingly. You minimize risk.
Descriptors: anticipates obstacles, makes solid decisions, plans for the unexpected
Discipline – You enjoy routine and structure, focusing on timelines and deadlines. You break long-term projects into a series of specific short-term plans, and you work through each plan diligently. You create order as a way to continue progress.
Descriptors: highly productive and accurate because of ability to structure, breaks down complex into steps, great planner, promotes efficiency
Focus – You take a direction, follow through and make the corrections necessary to stay on track. You prioritize, then act. You regularly set goals that become your compass; focus forces you to be efficient. When others wander, you bring them back to the goal.
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