by L. J. Red
She’d felt so close to him as he told her of his past, the hunters, the woman that he had loved. Part of her had felt shattered at that. The knowledge that he had already loved before. But the way he touched her as he taught her to fight, each touch whipping her into a frenzy of desire, she hadn’t been able to restrain her arousal. She wanted him. She needed him.
They moved, tangled in each other, from the center of the cabin towards the fire. He laid her down on the fur rug, and May stretched as he peeled her clothes from her body. The luxurious fur underneath her. Neal stripped off his shirt, and May stared at the play of light over his muscles, her breath caught, her mouth dry.
All her plans forgetting, all her promises to stay away from him, to deny herself. She couldn’t deny herself. This felt right, and she for once, she wanted to embrace that feeling. She just wanted to give into her desires, and with this gorgeous hunk of a vampire crouched above her, looking down at her with undeniable satisfaction, she finally let herself go.
He captured her mouth again, kissing her deeply, before turning his mouth to her jaw, her neck, hot and possessive. May let her head fall back, the heat of the fire washing over her sensitized skin. Her moans turning to gasps as he spread her legs, slowly, gently… teasingly. Her hips twitched. God, she needed him, needed him inside her. She reached for him, her fingers tangling with his as he caught her hands and pressed her down, pinning them above her head, curled over her. His eyes caught hers, darkened with lust and wicked knowledge. He knew what this was doing to her. Before she could speak—beg or demand he moved, he suddenly rocked forward, his thick length pressing against her and finally, finally, entered her. May’s breath caught in her lungs, biting her lip against the pleasure-pain of it. The slow burn as she was stretched, filled. She clutched his massive shoulders, unable to do anything but ride out the rhythm he set, feeling both out of control yet safe in his embrace, free to let go in a way she had never done before, to just feel.
The warmth of the fire in the grate mingled with the heat within her and she lost herself to pleasure, riding higher until at the last moment she opened her eyes and saw him, his eyes darkened with lust, his lips red and slick, and his fangs bared. She was borne up on a wave of pleasure that blinded her. Neal shuddered above as the waves of their climax shattered through them. She bit down on her lip between her teeth so hard she tasted blood and lay there panting, boneless.
Neal shifted, and for a second, his eyes fastened on her lips, his muscles locking, tense, then he pulled away. She must have imagined it. May still felt dreamy, disconnected from her body as Neal lifted her up and carried her to the bed. For a moment it seemed he was going to leave, and she reached for him. “Stay,” she said, softly, “stay.” His muscles relaxed under her arm, and he joined her, gathering her up close until she was enfolded in his warmth, his rich male scent surrounding her.
She drifted, her body still twitching with aftershocks. He had tensed at her blood. The knowledge sent a little cold shard deep into her chest. He hadn’t wanted her blood, hadn’t wanted that final connection. May wriggled further into Neal’s embrace, trying to smother the thought. It didn’t matter. She wanted this. Wanted him. She couldn’t hide it from herself any longer, and if this was the only way she could get him, if all she could have was his kisses, his touch, if his heart was forever locked in the past, his love spent on another woman—so be it. She would take whatever she could, whatever affection he could give her. It would have to be enough.
She sank into sleep, warm and deep, and the next thing she knew, soft kisses were drifting across her skin. May woke fully to see the top of Neal’s head, his kisses drifting across her ribcage. The bed was lovely and warm and May felt Neal’s body pressed against hers, the undeniable hardness of his shaft against her thigh. She stretched against him like a cat—that was his reaction to her, hard, insistent proof he wanted her. It was thrilling. He looked up and his eyes, darkened with lust, drank her in. It made her feel strange, precious, in a way none of her previous boyfriends ever had. She didn’t know how to describe the emotions she felt, the sunshine that seemed trapped behind her ribs.
“Good morning,” she said.
Neal smirked. “Good night,” he corrected, and she laughed.
“Of course,” she said, “I’m still not quite used to the sleeping the days away and working only in the night. It calls for a whole new way of speaking,”
Neal smirked more widely. “Or we could not speak at all.” And he lifted himself up on thick forearms to press kisses against her lips.
“We have to go to work,” she said, her words dissolving into moans under his touch.
“Not yet,” he whispered and pressed himself against the juncture of her thighs.
She opened to him, losing herself in his touch for moments that stretched for hours.
Eventually, they dragged themselves from the bed. The sunset was well past, and May blushed to think of what she had been doing instead of her duties. She went quickly through her morning routine, tried not to waste another hour staring at Neal as he slowly pulled on his usual black outfit and a new jacket from the closet. She shrugged on her much-less-sexy neon green coat and walked out into the cold beside him.
The atmosphere outside was as cold as the weather, an ugly wake-up call. As May approached the main building, she noticed the watchful, wary expressions on everyone’s faces, the tense way the vampires held themselves, vassals all clustering together in groups. The attack had everyone on edge.
One of the vampire Elders approached them. He had a clear, young-looking face, but wise dark eyes and short dark hair. He glanced at May, nodded a greeting, then turned to Neal
“Neal,” he said, “I need to speak with you regarding the attack last night.”
“Finlay,” Neal nodded, and May realized this was the vampire Ivy worked for, the acting head of Clarity.
Then Neal turned to her and her attention was entirely caught. “Until later,” he said.
May nodded. “Yes, of course,” she said and watched him go, only to realize she was acting like a lovesick teenager when the cold wind finally brought her back to herself. She spun around and headed towards the back rooms, uncomfortably aware, now that Neal had gone, of the cold looks and wariness in the eyes around her. The feeling reminded her uncomfortably of the time before the Shadows had come to Chicago, when Radiance had held power over the city.
As she approached the building, she caught ugly whispers at the edge of her hearing.
“A vassal warming the Shadow’s bed.” May spun, but couldn’t see who had spoken.
“A pretty plaything,” she heard from another direction, the wind snatching the voices away.
She stared, wide-eyed, then turned her back and walked quickly into the building.
A plaything? Her high spirits sank, anger and misery curling in her gut. That wasn’t what she was to him. She was more than that, he had treated her like she was precious, like she mattered. But a chill started, deep in her chest when she thought of how he had tensed upon seeing her blood, turned away from her. She tried to shove the thoughts away, but they lingered, threading her body with unease.
Chapter 16
Isabella slipped between different groups of vampires. None of them knew her, most ignored her, seeing her for what she was, a weak vampire, belonging to no Bloodline, a hanger-on, at the bottom of the pack. She’d show them.
She glanced to either side, keeping her eyes out for the Shadows. One in particular. If Neal caught sight of her, everything would be ruined. She was getting tired of having to slink around, always watchful. The constant awareness was starting to take its toll on her. She’d gotten sloppy, trusting a human to do her job for her. Stupid. She should have searched the cabin herself, not left it to one of her minions. Now he was dead and Roman was pissed. She’d been avoiding the Radiance vampire, not wanting to deal with his anger, but, as if her thoughts had called him, she suddenly caught sight of his pale form, standing in the darkness between the
cabins. He beckoned, then faded away into the night.
She clenched her jaw, but she couldn’t disobey his summons. She made her way to the collection of cabins taken by Bloodline Radiance, noting the vampire guards standing warily around the place. She caught sight of one of the Shadows, not Neal luckily, but that tall Viking-looking one with his long hair and his scar. She drew back into the shadow cast by an overhanging roof and watched him pass. His eyes flickered over hers, but she turned her body, making herself look small, weak and his gaze flickered past. His scar was a clean, old. He must have had it before he was turned. She felt the itchy, painful scrape of the mask over her own seeping scars. One day, hers too would be healed, she swore, and then she could take the damn mask off.
She made her way to Roman’s cabin and silently let herself in. He was pacing in front of the empty fireplace. The room felt colder inside than out, and the chill permeated her bones.
“You are rapidly losing your usefulness,” he said with his back to her. His voice was so cold, Isabella almost expected ice to form. Then he turned, and she took a step back, pressing against the closed door. His eyes glowed with an unearthly light. His rage, so vast, Isabella fancied she could feel the force of it press against her skin.
“It wasn’t my fault,” she said. “The human—”
“The human,” Roman sneered. “You were supposed to control them. What were they doing in the Shadow’s cabin in the first place?”
“Looking for the key,” she hissed. “The damn door is locked and reinforced. I told you, there’s no way I’m getting in that room without the key—”
Roman waved his hand. “Spare me your excuses. The whole point of this scheme was to throw further suspicion on the Shadows, not on some human militant group that nobody gives a shit about. I already have the Elders breathing down my back, and now I’m getting accused of bringing humans into the Conclave. Don’t you see how bad this looks for me?” he said, massaging the fading claw marks in his neck, the vampire inflicted wounds healing slowly.
“What does it matter whether or not they blame the Shadows when the Circle is dust?” Isabella snapped.
“And how do I have any guarantee that will happen?” Roman hissed. “You are clearly even more incompetent than the humans you command.”
Isabella snarled. She ran her eyes over the scratches in his neck. Must have been one of the Shadows, she thought with a vicious thrill of satisfaction. No one else would have dared touch him.
“Looks like he scratched you up good,” she said with a smirk.
Roman shot from the other side of the cabin toward her, slamming her onto the floor, his hands around her neck, claws biting in deep. Isabella cried out at the pain, flinching and twisting in his grip.
“Listen to me, you little bitch,” he said. Isabella felt the strength in his limbs, and she trembled on the ground, hating her own weakness. “You’re going to do what I say. You’re going to get into that fucking room, or I will find someone else to do this job. Don’t fool yourself into thinking you’re special just because you have an in with the hunters. I know what you are. You’re a freak of nature, barely even a vampire.” Isabelle flinched at each insult. “You’re weak, unwanted, no wonder the Shadows rejected you,” he said with a laugh, flicking the mask off her face. “Look at you. Disgusting.” Isabella snarled up at him and tried to swipe him with her own claws, but he pinned her arms to the ground easily and laughed in her face. “Yes,” he hissed, “It’s even better when I feel their hatred.” And he rocked his hips into her.
Isabella was disgusted to feel his hardness against her body, and she twisted, trying harder to escape from him. Roman tangled his fingers in her hair and slammed her head down against the floor. “Now you listen to me,” he said. “You are going to stick to the plan. You are going to get that room open like we agreed, and there will be no more fuck-ups, human or otherwise. Or else, when we leave this place your dead body will be left behind in the dark and the cold forever. Do. You. Understand?” He slammed her head against the floor with each word.
“Yes,” Isabella said through clenched teeth. Her entire body was tightened in revulsion and pain at Roman’s presence on top of her. Her eyesight was blurred, dizzy from the pain. She needed to get out of here, needed to tell him whatever he wanted to hear before he broke her. “I understand. I won’t fail you.”
“Then get the hell out, or I’ll work out some of my aggression a different way.” He leered down at her. Isabella couldn’t stop the wave of revulsion she felt from showing in her face, but Roman just smirked down at her, finally loosening his grip.
Isabella scrambled out from under him and sped out of the cabin so fast her feet barely touched the ground. She ran blindly, tripping and falling into the snow, curling up in the cold. She would succeed this time. She never wanted to be in Roman’s power again. I’ll do it myself, she thought. I was a fool to trust humans to do the job. The human woman is the target. I’ll find a way to make her give me the key. Why would she suspect me? She has no memory of our first meeting. Yes. I’ll convince her to give it up. I know exactly how to do it. She grinned, her mouth stretching in a mad smile. Oh yes. She had the perfect lie ready on her lips.
Chapter 17
“May,” a familiar voice called, interrupting May’s thoughts. She turned and looked around; she’d only stepped outside of the Conclave buildings for a short breather. The knowing looks from other vassals were starting to get to her. She hadn’t realized the rumors were already circulating about her and Neal, and she didn’t know how to react to them. Did she snap back? Stare people down? Protest that whatever Neal and she had together, it wasn’t anyone else’s business? In the end, she’d decided to just ignore them. Starve them of air, and eventually, the rumors would die down. They had to.
May searched, peering into the darkness to answer the repeated call of her name. It took her a moment to realize where the voice was coming from. It was the vampire she had met on the first day, the woman with the half mask over her face. She was standing in the shadow of one of the cabins, and when May saw her, the vampire beckoned her over.
May, frowning slightly, walked up to her. She shivered as a gust of wind clutched at the edges of her coat.
“Isabella,” she said, remembering the woman’s name. There was something missing, something hovering on the edge of her memory, but she couldn’t quite pin it down.
Isabella smiled widely, yet, despite her seeming friendliness, unease ran down May’s spine. She tugged her coat closer around herself. Must be the cold. “Can I help you, Isabella?” she asked.
Isabella reached out and pressed her hand playfully on May’s shoulder. “Help me?” she said, “Oh don’t be foolish. I merely wanted to see how you are doing. I haven’t seen you these past few days, and I heard about that awful human in the Shadow’s cabin. You were there, weren’t you? Why, what on earth were you doing in the Shadow’s cabin?”
May found herself blushing despite herself, and she stuttered out an answer. “I was just… well, Neal wanted me to stay with him.”
A flash of something dark and vicious flicked through Isabella’s eyes so fast that May was sure she must have mistaken the expression for something else. “Oh, my,” Isabella said with a suggestive smile, “you have been naughty.” And her grip on May’s shoulder was for a second uncomfortably tight, even through the thick layers of May’s coat. May flinched back slightly, and Isabella let her go. “A Shadow of your own,” she said, “how unusual. I’ve heard they’re quite the beasts in bed. You will simply have to tell me whether or not that’s true.”
A frisson of temper and protectiveness over Neal rose up in May. “I’m not sure that’s any of your business,” she said tightly.
“Oh, you’re just too good,” Isabella snapped.
May’s glance was wary, uncertain.
Isabella’s smile suddenly flickered to life as if in an attempt to reassure May, and she smoothed her hand down the side of May’s coat. “Oh, come now, I didn’
t mean it like that. It’s simply that it’s so unusual for the Shadows to pick a human,” she laughed, but the sound was cold and empty of humor. “Sleeping with one of the Shadows for a night, it’s any vampire’s dream. They are such a wild ride. All that vicious energy they spend fighting, it’s no wonder they occasionally need to release it in a different way. Why those Shadows must be so bored up here, isolated in the cold.” She waved her hand to indicate the lodge.
May’s eyes followed her gesture to the sprawling buildings, the icy pines—to her it was new and exciting, but to Neal, who must have traveled all over the world, was it boring? Was he using her as a way to pass the time? She felt an icy stab in her chest.
There was a knowing light in Isabella’s eyes as she continued, “Of course, their voracious appetites mean they never rest with one woman for long, but that’s a good thing,” she said, her eyes glittering. “No human could keep up with their strength and stamina. He didn’t hurt you, did he?”
May shrank back from Isabella’s cold eyes. The sex had been intense, certainly, and she still felt sore, but she didn’t hurt. “No,” May said, “he wouldn’t hurt me.”
“Oh,” said Isabella, her eyes wide, “well, then he must have… of course, he must have held back, you’re such a little thing,” she said, looking down at her.
May shivered from more than just the cold. Isabella was wrong. She was more to Neal than just a way to work off all his energy. More than just… a willing body. A flush of anger at Isabella’s insinuations brought blood to her face.
“Oh, look at you,” Isabella said her hand cold on May’s cheek for a moment, “blushing so sweetly, I’m sure you’re quite the distraction. I must say, I’m surprised he let himself grow so close to you. They are usually so obsessed with their duty, particularly now at the Conclave, when the fate of the Shadows hangs in the balance.” Her smile seemed empty.