by Jax Hart
“I know,” he clasps my shoulder with one palm, “that shit’s gonna take time.”
“His death’s fucked me up more than I thought. I mean… it felt like a sucker punch, I won’t lie. Sometimes I look up realizing I drove myself to his house; checking on him was such a routine for me. My truck idles in the driveway and I stare at the house that holds so many memories. But the fucked-up part? It was never my life—it was his.”
“What are you getting at?”
“It was his house, his wife, his daughter—”
“Damn, Rog. If you wanted a life like that for yourself, you could’ve had it. Hell, you still can.”
“I don’t know. I’m set in my ways now. I’ve got the club, my bar… finding someone now—seems like it would only mess me up more.”
“What about Devon? I think you should see where that goes… ”
“Yeah, I know where that’ll go, straight to my damn bed till she can’t walk straight,” I mutter.
“What’s wrong with that? Sounds like a solid plan to me.”
I rub the back of my neck with one hand, kick the dirt and look up. “What the fuck? Why is everyone getting in my face about her. Since when has the club become a friggin’ Oprah episode?”
“Jesus, calm down Rog. I care about you, brother. I know Colin’s death hit you hard. Take some time off if you need to. Federico can run Sassy’s.”
“No. I can’t. Time off is the last thing I need. Along with an empty house with nothing but memories and ghosts for company? No,” I shake my head feeling my chest tighten I can’t breathe. I’m choking on all the emotions I keep stuffing deep inside.
“Dammit Rog, all I’m sayin’ is that you’ve spent the last twenty years taking care of everyone but yourself. Shanna’s all grown and has Duke now. Colin’s gone. His pain and suffering—over. Snatch that girl up quick before someone else does.”
Images of Devon fill my head. How it could be—us, tangled up in my oversized king bed, making love all night, then again in the morning while the snow falls softly on my cabin. I’d keep her warm, tucked to my body as I’d cherish her, taking her again and again, till we fall back asleep. I’d wake up make coffee and we’d snuggle back in bed.
Christ.
Is Smith right? Could I be lucky enough to find something good at this stage of my life? I spent so many years loving people who weren’t mine, I’ve forgotten what’s it’s like to have someone for myself.
My lips twitch. Under Devon’s smooth skin is a girl with fire in her blood. Hell, we’ve been dancing around our mutual attraction for weeks. The two of us are a keg full of gunpowder ready to explode. And damn, I could use some heat.
My balls are full and aching. I moan, feeling it rumble around my chest. Once I touch the girl, there’s no going back. In my gut, I know she’d feel so fine, I’d never let her go. Or let another man touch her.
Maybe it’s time I take an old lady after all.
The question is: Does Dev have what it takes to be my bride?
Hells yeah, she does. That girl has more spunk than both pledges combined. But we’ll take it slow. I crave something solid, something I could build years on. It ain’t gonna work if she’s only here temporarily. I just need to make her fall in love with Springdale, and the old badger who will never leave.
“WAKE UP, SUNSHINE.” I pull the comforter off Luce and snap open the blinds.
“Evil bitch,” she groans throwing an arm over her eyes.
“No, you don’t,” I tell her in a singsong voice as she replaces her arm with a pillow and buries her head. “We need to get a move on before they ride back. I need to visit the cemetery now that my bodyguards are gone and you’re treating me to that manicure.”
“Ughhhh, what time is it?” She moans.
“Seven. Come on. Coffee’s done,” I slap her butt hard.
“Oww!”
I shake my head in envy at how Luce doesn’t need to work out to have a killer bod. She’s petite, naturally slim and I’ve seen her eat half a pizza and still have a flat stomach the next day. Her honey colored hair is naturally wavy and she’s tan from spending her weekends at the lake.
“Someday.”
“What?” She asks.
“Someday your prince is gonna come, Luce.”
“He better,” she grumbles sitting up. “And then, I’m gonna come.”
“Dirty slut.”
“You know it,” she winks.
“I’m so sorry.” Her hand comes up to my shoulder.
“It’s stupid. I don’t even know why I’m crying.”
“Yes, you do. She was… she gave you, life.”
“Then she gave me up,” I mutter wiping my face. “The new stone looks good though. No one’s been here to deface it,” I half-joke drying the rest of my tears on the bottom of my T-shirt. “You know what? I think you’re right and I’m going to call my mother today.”
“Good. What are you going to do about Roger? Are you going to tell him who you are?”
Hands twisting the ends of my shirt up I answer on a whisper, “I don’t know. I’m afraid. I’m afraid he won’t look at me the same way.”
“Like he wants to devour you?”
I nod.
She sucks in a breath. “I can’t wait to meet this guy. Come on, the nail salon opens at nine.”
“Hold on, I need to visit my father’s grave first.”
Luce shakes her head. “What tragic lives they had. Did you find out anything about him?”
“No. Not yet. I thought it might be suspicious if I started asking about them both at the same time.”
“I just hope that if… when… you reveal your identity, it doesn’t blow up in your face.”
“Me too. But if it does, it does. I need to keep reminding myself that I came here for answers not romance.”
“There’s nothing wrong with finding both.”
“I wish it were that simple. But I’m not sure Rog is going to understand.”
“I’ll kick his ass if he doesn’t.”
“Yeah, okay,” I snort. “You haven’t seen the man yet. Ten men couldn’t bring him down. He’s built like a tank.”
“Fine. I’ll mess him up somehow. No one hurts you, Dev. Ever.”
“I’m so glad you’re here. It means so much to me that you came. Not just to see Springdale, but to see why I don’t think I’ll leave.”
“Whoa. What? I thought the plan was to stay a year then come back. Hell, half your stuff is in my basement.”
“I don’t know. It’s only been a month but somewhere, somehow, this town feels more like home than Chicago ever did.”
“Yeah, until Creed boots your ass out.”
“No way. No way am I going to let them. You’ll see they might be as large and menacing as a Scottish army in the highlands but they’re all softies at heart.”
“Scottish army?”
“What? You now I like my Regency Romances…. men in kilts, with long hair and cocks as big as a horse. Hells yeah, sign me up for that shit.”
Luce rolls her eyes, “You need to get laid.”
“Probably,” I answer with a laugh as we walk toward the only nail salon in town.
My bike glides into the back lot. I climb off feeling my heart pound like a goddamn teen about to pick up his date for prom. She’s already here. I checked in with Federico every day I was gone. I almost fell off my damn bike when he told me she’s hot for me. I mean women throw themselves at me on the regular but they’re mostly drunk. Devon… with Dev, I wasn’t sure if she was just flirting with me because I’m her boss or if there was something more.
God damn, there’s something more.
I wipe my sweaty palms on my jeans. I’m not sure how to act around her now. Do I pretend that I don’t know? Do I haul her in my office and kiss the breath out of her? Maybe I should just do it the good old-fashioned way and ask her on a date.
I open the back door and walk silently down the back hall leading to the main room of the bar a
nd restaurant.
She’s bending over a long table wiping it down, the back of her white shorts riding high, showing miles of tan leg. Her hair’s down her back hanging in long loose curls. If I close my eyes I can still remember the way it smelled when I held her and the scent of it filled my nostrils. My fingers itch to rub the silky strands, my dick’s swelling in my jeans wanting an introduction to the honey pot between her thighs.
Fuck the good old-fashioned way, I’m gonna go all caveman on her ass. My breath comes out in hiss, my thoughts causing all the blood to pump south. I’m fully engorged and harder than I was the first time I felt a woman’s hand stroke my cock.
Shit.
I force myself to look away from the heaven of her existence for my own sanity. My eyes flick to the heavy watch on my left wrist. Ten a.m. It’s only ten a.m. and I can’t function. Thoughts of touching her have me all jacked up. I either need to go rub one out in the showers downstairs or hit the gym until I can’t breathe.
I’m not a fumbling boy, far from it. I’ll push through my desire harnessing it into a different kind of pain. Instead of pounding into her sweet pussy, my fists will pound the hell outta the punching bag. I’ll throw down until my fists bleed if that’s what it takes.
I want Devon, but I refuse to lose my head over it. I need to get my shit under control. I can’t make a move when I’m high from her presence alone.
She already has me by the balls, but I’ll be damned before I ever show it. The boys would never let me live it down. I shrug out of my leather cut, holding it over an arm in front of me in an effort to disguise my eleven-inch boner. My lips twitch, remembering the look in every woman’s eye who has seen it. I groan, picturing Dev’s soft brown eyes staring at my cock dying to feel it sooth the ache deep inside her. I’d hit her sweet G-spot until her eyes roll back in her head, and then I’d hit it some more while I’d play with the nub between her silken folds and suck on those sweet ass tits.
Her back stiffens as she looks at me from the corner of her eye. Muttering under my breath, I ignore her, walking on legs as stiff as my dick and slap the swinging doors to the kitchen open. Ignoring Federico helping himself to leftovers, I open the stain less steel walk-in freezer trying to freeze my libido. But all it does is burn. My damn dick is hard and frozen. Jesus, in this state—only an orgy or a three-day fuck is going to calm this beast down.
“Son of a bitch!” I groan punching the wall encrusted with a thin layer of ice. My knuckles split, spilling drops of blood on my boot.
“That didn’t take long.”
“Shut up, Federico or the next punch will smash your face.”
His answer is a howl of laughter followed by something he didn’t think I caught when he uttered it under his breath.
“What did you call me?”
“Nothing,” he denies holding his hands up as I stalk out of the freezer towards him.
“Say it again.”
He darts around the butcher’s block mouthing, “Silver Fox.”
I close my eyes and count to ten, hands clenching to fists, as I pant like a bull looking for a fight, needing to release the anger and lust burning me up on the inside.
“Calm down, Rog. She likes you. Why are you so pissed, man?”
“I’m not pissed. I’m fuckin’ horny you idiot.”
My hand swipes out knocking pans to the floor, they clang so loud my head pounds.
The doors swing open and she rushes in, my head swings her way, our eyes lock. I don’t look away but stare at her… hard. Telling her with my eyes what my hands and body are gonna do to hers. She swallows hard, the pulse in her neck beating so fast, I can see it from twenty feet away.
She brings a hand to her hair, nervously pushing a strand behind her ear, “Is everything okay in here?” She glances quickly between me and Federico who is grinning like a bastard at the fool I’m making outta myself.
I grunt, wrapping a kitchen towel around my knuckles. In an instant she’s right in front of me, cooing all sorts of nonsense. Her tiny hands unwrap the towel to inspect my cuts. My body trembles as I lower my head to inhale the fragrance of her hair. She leads me over to the sink and turns on the cold tap. “Get out,” I snap at Federico.
She bites her lip, dabbing my cut. Her pink tongue darts out to lick her lips and I snap, shutting off the sink and lifting her by the waist in one move. She gasps as her ass slams down on the counter. My hands spread her thighs for me to stand between, my rough hands cup her face gently. My fingers stroke her soft cheeks, I sigh, my breath falling on her face. “Dev,” I groan pressing my erection against the sweet apex of her thighs. I press my forehead to hers reveling in the friction and heat of her pressed tightly against me. “I’m gonna kiss you baby. Kiss you like the world is ending.”
Her lips part on a sigh, my hands cup her chin as my lips explore hers, softly, courting them. My lips grab hers, I pull her bottom lip, slip my tongue in a bit then back out. She scoots closer, wrapping her legs around my waist and throws her head back as my lips travel down the side of her neck and across her collarbone. She clutches the back of my head, my dick pulses, but I can’t take more than a kiss.
“Miss me, baby?”
“Just shut up and kiss me, Rog.”
My hands cup her face, her eyes close. I take a second to savor this moment, my mind taking a screenshot of her face in this moment before we dive deep and see where this thing goes.
This time, it’s a kiss.
Our lips meet, our bodies a frenzy of sighs and groans and roaming hands. My tongue strokes hers, it’s a sweet torment of twists and thrusts, sucks and nips of teeth. My heart slams against my ribcage. She’s makin’ me feel the kinds of shit women pay to watch on the big screen between actors. But this isn’t a script and I’m not acting. I’m falling fast for this girl and for the first time in years—I let my control slip and give in to the fall.
Damn the man knows how to kiss. He didn’t dive straight into it. He took his time savoring the taste of me. His giant hands cupped my face like it was made of china and his eyes burned into mine with that light blue flamed gaze of his that haunts my dreams as he groaned my name—as if just saying it aloud was a release.
I raise a hand to my lips swollen from his kisses. My thighs rub together sticky and swollen, remembering the feel of him pressed up there.
My hands shake as I straighten my clothing and fix my hair. I moan, in agony not knowing how in the hell I’m gonna work my double shift with wet panties and eyes with stars in them that he put there.
We must’ve kissed for at least ten minutes before his cell rang and we reluctantly broke apart. He whispered, “Later baby,” pressed a lingering kiss on my mouth as his hand dropped from my face and he walked out, presumably to his office.
He was just as affected as I am. I grin, at least there’s that. We’re both miserable and horny. We lit a fire that can only go out one way.
Checking my reflection in the mirror for any lingering evidence that I just made-out with the boss, I tidy up. But there’s nothing I can do about the red flush staining my cheeks or the sheen of desire in my eyes.
My underpants are soaked. The wetness uncomfortable. Entering a stall, I wipe myself up and slide my thong down throwing it the trash.
“Hell,” I moan walking out feeling the seam of my shorts rub against my bare clit with every step I take.
The door to Roger’s office opens at the same time I walk out of the restroom. Our eyes meet in the dim hall. I slow, biting my lip. He growls and barrels forward. He’s on me in an instant, pinning my arms over my head and backing me up against the rough wood paneling.
“We got interrupted before, love,” he rasps seconds before claiming my mouth in a kiss full of passion and promise.
“Rog,” I answer in between breaths.
He pulls back searching my eyes, grabs my hand in his, and leads me into his office. The door shuts behind us with a firm click.
He rakes a hand through his hair and smooths his b
eard, staring at me like I’m his next meal.
“I-I’m sorry for being all over you like that,” he sighs placing his hands in his pockets and walking behind his desk. Putting it between us like an obstacle. Lord knows we need it, if we’re going to talk not touch.
“In case you couldn’t tell—I liked it.”
He smiles faintly, then looks down tapping his fingertips on the desk. “Still—I shouldn’t have done that. Especially here, when we’re both working. A few years ago, I wouldn’t have given a damn. I’d have hauled you in here or downstairs and would be eleven inches deep—ten-minutes ago,” he stops shaking his head as if to clear it, “I’m different now. I’m sober, quit smoking and I swore to myself I wouldn’t do shit like that here anymore now that I own this place.”
My stomach sours at the thought of him kissing, touching—god—fucking someone else.
“I should go,” I whisper, turning placing my hand on the doorknob. He made me forget why I’m even here. I lost myself in the moment… in the hope of what could start between us. But we can’t move forward without dealing with my past. And I’m not ready to tell him who I am before I find out who John and Dee were first.
“Dev, sugar… wait.”
He walks around the desk stopping two feet behind me. The heat from his body radiates forward as if he’s pressed up flat against me.
“I want to do this right with you. The club… we’re having our end of summer cookout on Saturday. It’s at a lake at the base of a mountain thirty minutes from here. Would you go with me as my date?”
My shoulders drop. I’m screaming inside. It’s the chance I’ve wanted, with the man I’ve wanted, and I can’t say yes.
“My best friend’s in town. She flew in to visit me. Actually, she’s coming in for dinner tonight.”
“I heard. All about it,” he teases.
“Federico has a big mouth,” I mutter.
“Bring her. It’s a large crowd, she’ll have fun.”
“O-okay. We’ll meet you there,” I reply darting out his door before he either hauls me in his arms again, or I cave and tell him all the secrets I’m hiding.