“I heard you talking to Andrew.” He stared at the floor, hearing James’ footsteps draw near. He’d earned this beating, he had.
He flinched from the hand moving towards his face, but forced himself to stay in position, to leave his hands by his sides. He could take this, he could. It was hard to get a deep breath in, his chest heaving, his body trembling.
James’ hand cupped his chin, tipping his head up.
“What are you so frightened of? What do you think I’m going to do?”
“Punish me.” His voice was a whisper.
“You mean beat you, like Jeremy did?”
Luke nodded, dropping his gaze.
“Why would I do that?”
It seemed like a strange question, but Luke answered it.
“So I learn not to do it again.”
“Do what again?”
“What I did wrong.”
“And what was that?”
The back and forth was confusing but that question wasn’t. He started to list his failures.
“I listened through the floorboards when I shouldn’t have, I came into your room and your bed. I ate food, even though I didn’t have your permission, I talked when I hadn’t been spoken too. I… I looked at the books in the study. I… I touched one of them. I thought about running away to find my brother.”
Was that everything? He wasn’t sure.
“If you think I’m going to beat you for all that, then why on earth do you want to mate with me?”
It was hard to explain but he did his best.
“Sometimes you… you put your hands on me, touch my cheek or my neck or my shoulder and your voice is kind and gentle. I thought the rest wouldn’t be so bad if you touched me like that, just sometimes. And… and you didn’t brand me. And you’ve fed me a lot.” He hurried to add, “But I don’t need to eat that much, you could give me less. I wouldn’t… I wouldn’t ask for more.”
There was a long silence broken at length by James’ tired voice.
“So, you want to mate with me because, in between the beatings and the starvation, you might get a kind touch once in a while?”
Luke realized his mistake. Tobias had taught him better.
“No. I’m sorry. I’m being selfish. You wouldn’t have to touch me like that. An Omega takes what his Alpha gives to him.”
James sighed. “And Alphas give pain and suffering, huh?”
“If it’s what an Omega deserves. If it’s what I deserve.”
“What if the Alpha doesn’t agree? What if the Alpha thinks an Omega should never be beaten or hurt? What if he thinks Omegas should always have plenty of food? What if he thinks an Omega should have kind touches every day?”
It sounded like paradise.
“He’d be a very lucky Omega to have an Alpha like that.”
“My Omega will be and I’ll be lucky to have him,” James said. Startled, Luke looked up, filled with hope for a brief moment before reality set in.
“Yes, he will be. When do I go back to Jeremy? Tomorrow?”
James’ hand slid from his chin to his shoulder, warm and gentle. The tears built up in his eyes and he couldn’t hold them back. Now he knew what a kind touch was, it was hard to imagine a life devoid of them. He admonished himself severely for the thought. He didn’t deserve this. James was taking pity on him.
“You’re not going back to Jeremy. I can’t let that happen.”
He was tugged forward, his face pressed against a broad chest as James’ arms held him tightly.
“I’m not going to beat you. You haven’t done anything wrong but it wouldn’t matter if you had, I’m still not going to hurt you. You don’t need my permission to eat or to touch the books in the study. You don’t have to be frightened about Jeremy because, no matter what, you’re not going back to him.”
“So you’ll mate with me?”
“You haven’t gone into heat yet, Luke. There’s time for you to think, meet some other Alphas. You might like to mate with someone closer to your own age.”
“Why? How old are you?”
“Thirty-two. Do you know how old you are?”
Luke shook his head. “But Tobias said I was old enough to go into heat so he’d found me an Alpha.”
“Well, I think that means you’re at least twenty.”
“Is that a big gap?”
“Some would say no, some would say yes. In shifter terms, I guess it isn’t.”
His tears began to dry, his tired body leaning heavily against the Alpha’s chest.
“Let’s get you back into bed,” James said, helping him under the covers. When he tried to leave, Luke latched onto his arm.
“What is it?” James asked. Luke hesitated.
“Whatever it is, you can tell me,” James insisted gently.
“Every time I close my eyes, he’s there.”
“He?”
“Jeremy.”
“Why don’t I stay and keep you company until you fall asleep?”
Luke nodded readily, surprised when James lay down next to him on top of the covers. He inched a little closer to the Alpha, until the Alpha's scent filled his senses, blocking out anything else.
James’ hand found his shoulder and trailed up and down along his arm, the touch soothing, distracting, and undeserved. Could an Alpha really believe all those things James had said? There was a part of Luke that wanted to cling to his words but there was another part, the part that heard Tobias’ voice shadowing everything he did, that told him he was wrong.
Chapter Fifteen
He hadn’t meant to fall asleep next to Luke but the events of the previous days had worn him down. Luke was already awake when he opened his eyes, watching him cautiously. James hated that, the way the Omega would stare at him like at any moment he might snap and lash out at him.
He smiled over at him, watching Luke’s expression change as he tentatively returned the smile.
“Did you sleep well?” he asked.
Luke nodded. “I didn’t dream about Jeremy at all. Or Tobias.”
“Good. And you remember what I said last night? You’re not going back to Jeremy and that’s a promise.”
“What will happen to me?”
“You’ll stay here, for now, so we can make sure you’re safe and keep you out of Jeremy’s hands. After that, we’ll see.”
As he watched the Omega, Luke squirmed next to him, stretching his muscles as if uncomfortable.
“What’s wrong? Are your injuries bothering you?”
Luke stilled at his words, shaking his head with a jerk. There was a strained look about his expression and he moved again, inching his shoulders back as he lay on his stomach. There was clearly something bothering him.
“If not your injuries, then what? It’s like you’ve got a crick in your neck.”
Luke looked puzzled at that but didn’t speak.
“Are your muscles sore?” James reached out as he spoke. In response, Luke flattened himself against the bed and James stopped, his hand hovering above Luke’s back.
“It’s okay,” he said, persevering and setting his hand lightly on Luke’s back. The problem was immediately apparent, as Luke’s wolf rose to meet his and Luke shuddered beneath him, his eyes almost rolling back into his head.
“Oh, hell. When was the last time you spent any time in wolf form?”
Luke blinked. “Before Tobias gave me to Jeremy.”
“That was over a week. Why the hell haven’t you changed since?”
His tone had Luke huddling against the blanket, his response a whisper. “I didn’t have permission.”
“Permission?” James echoed back. “Why would you need permission?”
“We’re trained to hold our form for as long as our Alpha desires.”
James sighed at that, letting his hand brush Luke’s hair for a moment.
“Come on then, we’ll go for a run before breakfast.”
“I have your permission?”
“You don’t need my permissio
n to shift. I’m offering you my company. You shouldn’t leave this house by yourself, so I’ll accompany you.”
He got out of bed as Luke sat up. “Now?”
“Don’t you want to?”
Luke nodded cautiously and slipped out of bed to stand next to him.
“Why don’t you shift and I’ll let the others know we’re going out?”
He jogged downstairs to let Graham know, organizing an extra guard to cover the woods while they were out. When he returned to the bedroom, Luke was naked, crouched on the floor, but still human. James could hear the fast beat of his heart and hear each panted breath.
“I… I can’t,” the Omega said, trying to shield himself from James’ gaze.
“You can’t change?” he asked, shedding his own clothes.
Luke looked up, watching him anxiously.
“I’m not surprised. You’re full of fear. It’s got such a tight grip on your body that it can’t let go. Come on, stand up.”
Luke got to his feet, still trying to cover himself. James stepped behind him, placing a hand on his shoulder and leading him towards the mirror.
“Now, let’s see if we can’t relax you a little.”
Luke was watching the floor.
“You’re not the first wolf I’ve met who struggled to change. I can help but you have to trust me.”
“What… what will you do?”
“Help you loosen up and bring your wolf to the surface. It won’t hurt though the change might if you haven’t shifted in a while.”
James’ hand brushed lightly along his shoulder and Luke lifted his head, glancing into the mirror. Their eyes met and James held the Omega’s gaze.
“Take a deep breath,” he said, watching as Luke obeyed, his chest rising.
“And let it out slowly.” His chest fell.
“Again.”
This time, as Luke breathed in, James rested hands on his shoulders, letting his thumbs knead the skin. He could feel Luke’s wolf below the surface but every time he reached for it, it skittered away, as fearful as the human shell it lived within.
“That’s it. Nice, slow breaths. Let your body relax, let your shoulders fall back, focus on your breathing and the pressure of my hands.”
James had read everything he could about Omegas since learning of their re-emergence. He knew there were differences to other wolves, not least being the sensitivity of the nerve bundle at the back of their necks. More so even than a female wolf. But Luke’s skin was red and sore. He could see the pain was still great, even a small movement of Luke’s neck caused him to wince.
He moved one hand to the back of Luke’s head, pushing him forward so his forehead just rested against the mirror. He spent a long moment looking at Luke’s neck. It was the key to this but the slightest misstep would cause pain enough to eclipse everything else. How far did the nerve bundle stretch? Using one finger, he traced along Luke’s hairline, testing the response. Luke twitched and James slid his finger down a third of an inch and stroked the skin again. That got a reaction, Luke rising onto his tiptoes, his breath pushing out in a large whoosh. He was half an inch from the edge of the branded skin. A safe distance, he felt. Running his finger along it a second time, Luke shuddered, his palms coming up to press against the mirror as he made little helpless noises.
“Good?” James asked
Luke nodded. “And bad. It feels so nice but it hurts.”
James carded a soothing hand through Luke’s hair. “I’m sorry. I can stop if it’s too much.” But already he could feel Luke’s wolf lurking close to the surface. What he was doing was working, he just had to persevere.
“No, it… it feels good. Is it supposed to?”
“Oh, yeah. Right there on your neck is a bundle of nerves. In shifters, Omegas especially, they’re linked to mating and bonds. That’s why what Jeremy did was so cruel.”
“Is that why my neck still hurts so much?”
“That’s why.”
Afraid they were getting off track, James returned to stroking along the skin. Luke let his head rest against the mirror again and James could see the fear was receding, Luke focused on letting himself feel the sensations that rose in his body.
James wrapped an arm around Luke’s waist and tugged him backward, turning them both then lowering Luke to his hands and knees on the floor.
“Change,” he murmured, kneeling next to Luke, his fingers trailing back and forth across Luke’s skin.
Luke’s whole body spasmed, then his back arched and he cried out. The change came forth, muscles rippling beneath his skin and then a wolf with white fur was crouched on the floor in front of him.
Chapter Sixteen
James wasted no time changing and leading Luke outside. It was clear from the white wolf’s hesitant steps that he was strangely unused to his shifter form and to being outside. He stuck close to James but at the same time kept some distance. Both seeking James’ protection and keeping out of his reach. An odd juxtaposition.
James led him a little way into the woods, watching to see what he did. Apart from sniffing idly at a few things, Luke remained still and self-contained. James got the strong sense he was looking at a wolf who’d never learned how to play. How long had he been in Tobias’ hands? Long enough that he’d never truly been a child?
Catching the scent of rabbit on the breeze, he chased after it, hoping Luke would follow. When he lost the scent, he turned, Luke right behind him. He pressed forwards, circling Luke slowly. The Omega crouched, lowering his head submissively. James stepped closer, nuzzling his nose against the fur of Luke’s flank then playfully nipped and him and bounded away. Luke’s eyes watched him but he didn’t give chase, so James did it again, and again. The third time, Luke caught on, chasing after him and James took off, hearing Luke crashing through the undergrowth behind him. He didn’t run too fast or too far, ensuring he was always within sight of Luke. The Omega was too shy to actually try to catch him, hanging back even when he caught up.
There was a small stream nearby so James led him there to drink some water. He led by example, crouching at the bank, lapping eagerly at the cool water. A minute later, Luke stepped up beside him. He seemed a little startled when he saw his reflection on the surface of the water. He lapped more cautiously than James, his eyes on the woods around them.
Graham was nearby, with two others a little further back. Did Luke know they were there or was this just his wary nature? James hoped it wouldn’t be too long before he saw Luke unguarded, enjoying the moment.
“James!”
A voice called him in the distance. It sounded like Sandra. Shifting quickly back to human form, he saw Luke startle next to him, jerking away and rolling over the bank into the river with a splash.
James reached for him as his change completed, surprised to find his hands closing on a very human body as he pulled a soak, startled Luke from the water. Luke coughed and gasped and James patted him on the back, steadying him with his other hand.
“I’m sorry,” Luke offered.
James ignored that. “Are you okay?”
Luke nodded but already he was starting to shiver. “I didn’t know you were going to do that.”
“Sorry, I didn’t mean to surprise you. That was Sandra, let’s go find her.”
Taking Luke by the hand, he led him through the woods, glancing back at the Omega, who still seemed dazed. Graham caught up with them and James leaned over to whisper in his ear.
Graham nodded, slipping off his jacket and handing it over. James turned, pulling Luke a little closer, then wrapped the jacket around his shoulders. Luke clung to it tightly, giving him a grateful smile.
Sandra’s voice called again and they picked up the pace.
As soon as they emerged from the trees, she hurried toward them.
“The Pack Council. They’re coming. They’re coming here.”
“That’s either really good news or really bad,” Graham said.
“Let’s hope for the former and prepa
re for the latter. Get everyone ready. We'll look the part of gracious hosts and be ready to defend ourselves if it becomes necessary.”
James kept an arm around Luke as they walked towards the house. The Omega’s head was down, his cheeks flushed. No wonder, as there were a lot of curious glances aimed his way. By now, everyone had heard about the Omega they’d found or rescued or stolen, depending on which version of the story they’d heard.
“Come on,” he said, tugging on the jacket around Luke as they entered the house. “That means you, too. Let’s try and make you as unobtrusive as possible.”
Luke followed him upstairs.
“What’s unobtrusive?” he asked as they stepped into James’ room.
“It’s about not attracting attention. We want you to just blend into the background and look like any other shifter.”
“Could they take me away? If they knew what I was?”
“I’m not about to let that happen,” James said, throwing a towel to Luke. Luke let the towel fall on the bed, still wearing the jacket Graham had given him. He turned back to James, taking a step towards him. He pushed the jacket off one shoulder and then the second, slowly exposing himself to James.
“Couldn’t you mate with me? Then they can’t take me away, because I’ll be yours.”
James closed the distance between them, pulling the jacket back up to cover Luke and closing it tightly around him.
“The only way they’d truly accept you as my mate, is if you go into heat and we bond. There’s no rushing that.”
He stepped away, searching through the drawers for clothes.
“Are you sure? Isn’t there some way to bring on my heat? Maybe if we had sex, I’d go into heat anyway?”
James closed his eyes, hands holding tight to the handles of the drawer.
“I know you’re scared Luke, but I promise you, no matter what, you’re not going to end up back in Jeremy’s hands.”
Luke stepped closer.
“It’s not just about that anymore. I want to stay with you. I want to be close to you.”
“And if that isn’t what I want?”
Luke looked stricken for a moment before a blank look fell across his face, his voice devoid of emotion when he spoke.
The Alpha's Heart: Lost Omegas Book Five: A M/M Shifter Romance Page 8