‘Antinous, my friend, relax. Cool down. Take it easy. I am not going to impose anything upon you wouldn’t wish yourself,’ he reassured. ‘I do not tyrannize my companions. So come over here,’ he added, taking Antinous by the shoulders in a sociable way and guiding him to the nearest of the dining couches to take seat. The two had moved into a space of clear moonlight which made my observation all the more easier.
Even though Hadrian sat on the lip of the couch, Antinous stood stiffly at military attention in the formal hoplite pose of his training. He was facing Hadrian in deference to age, status, or arete and the ingrained habits of the military.
‘You have spirit, lad. But it is not the wild spirit of the reckless, I detect. You are also tempered by humor and some charm. The humor has natural confidence and a quick wit. It is my will to get to know you, Antinous of Bithynia,’ Caesar declared plainly.
‘I need someone of spirit in my life again, my boy. I need a young man’s vitality at my side for a refreshment of my vision. I need the optimism of the young to reinvigorate my veins, instilled in me through the energy of the companionship of a respectable ephebe of good character and personable appeal.
I desire such a person to be in my life again to restore to me values and virtues which differ substantially from our prosaic Roman ones, let alone the cynicism of politics or the venality of my Court.
Your Bithynian enthusiasms for your antique Hellene culture - several of my retinue claim it’s an antiquated Hellene culture - and your uninhibited engagement with its pedagogical tradition inspires you towards values of great formative power,’ he announced with obvious ardor.
Hadrian drew Antinous closer to him by the tip of a finger at his elbow, and even from my distance I could observe how Antinous trembled with apprehension.
‘You are still young, Antinous, so I have a great deal to teach you, all to your personal advantage. Though I’ve been noting youngsters like you here at Bithynia and elsewhere, I will concede you have singularly captivated me. Truly, when you enter my sight, Antinous of Bithynia, I find delight enters my heart at the same time.
Despite your youth you possess a solemnly mature charisma, you display cool charm and sly Greek wiles, while you project the innate dynamism of youth. These bode well for you, my boy. Besides, you are spoken of with honor in your own community, and I am told of your descent from ancient Hellenes of good family and proven warrior stock.
You speak well in your native Greek, and I have been told your Latin shows promise if exposed to regular conversation. These are a sign of intelligence.
Your wrestling skill at the palaestra games indicated excellent coordination and a good strategic sense, with a fierce will to win despite your beefier opponent’s weight. Your evasive defense throughout was a pleasure to observe.
In the foot races you sprint well with the manly gait of a true athlete. The races in armor prove your high stamina. Your horsemanship at our hunt today was exemplary, perhaps unique even, and you assess and take risks swiftly. I sense you will become adept at hunting all manner of game, large and small, which is a priority of my leisure time.
These things bode well for you to someday receive a commission with a cavalry unit of prestige. Or better. These are telling things about your quality, my boy,’ Hadrian offered flatteringly. Antinous was stricken quite dumb by this shower of compliments.
‘Yet you also exhibit a natural animal grace and motion, young man, with finely defined limbs and a well-modeled body. Your physical symmetries are indeed well balanced. Your oiled and dusted nakedness while wrestling at the palaestra displayed a most pleasing line, widely commented upon with favor by those around, I perceived.
I must be frank with you to say you have loins of proportions which will attract many an eye, young fellow, male or female. I believe this is the Bithynian way? Your compatriots admire the comeliness of youth’s perfection and its bodily vigor, accompanied by the magnetism of youth’s latent potential. Such perfections can incite a man to seek to couple with such extraordinary beauty. Their earthier impulses may erupt beyond decency.
So you must appreciate the homage of my carnal ambitions towards you. You should be flattered when I say your contours, your silhouette, your cut definition, and your sleek loins compellingly invite playfulness, my friend. Many would agree with me, I assure you. Some philosophers say this bodily perfection echoes an ultimate universe of ideal forms. And it is a perfection I deduce of both mind as well as body.’
Antinous visibly, and I less visibly in hiding, were disturbed by this well-meaning but indelicate shower of flatteries. I am sure they would have alarmed him.
To talk of being the emperor’s ‘friend’ in the same phrases as references to his body and loins is to infringe the unspoken code of honor-and-shame ruling men’s relationships. It proclaims a discourse of domination and penetration. To talk carelessly of horseplay is one thing, but to vocalize the prospect of being buggered is something else altogether!
In the years since that night at Nicomedia I have learned how at Rome they call this imposition a stuprum, an offence against a freeborn maiden or youth which insults civic honor and may invoke legal reprisal. A mature Roman’s urge to penetrate an attractive younger person might be gender blind, as people say, but the license to do so extends only to targets without Roman citizen’s rights, such as slaves or foreigners. Freeborn Romans are securely fenced off from behavior which impugns their status as future citizens. But a freeborn person of foreign origin is a permissible goal.
Nevertheless, in my later travels I was to witness how at Rome the edict about acts of stupra against the freeborn is honored far, far more in the breach than in the keeping.”
Lysias paused momentarily to sip his wine. His observers waited patiently for him to return to his testimony.
It crossed Suetonius’s mind how Greek philosophers since Aristotle, Zeno, Plato or even Epicurus argued that in an ideal city state citizens should restrain their itch to enjoy exuberant sexuality because it diverts from the proper goal of civic mindedness, which is baby-making. But these were not popular sentiments among most Greeks. In a land where too many mouths to feed can impoverish, baby-making becomes a restrained urge in one’s sexual repertoire. Less procreative bodily pleasures are preferred.
Worryingly, the later works of ancient Plato propound how even ‘total abstinence maketh the man’ because young men who act otherwise ‘risk becoming girlish cinaedi’. Such philosopher’s calls to celibacy are not widely regarded sentiments, however, especially among the young who are driven in their sexuality.
These abstemious ways of the philosophers influence all manner of strange cults and new gods.
That notoriously obsessive Judaean advocate of his Savior God Chrestus, Paulus of Tarsus, was laughed out of both Ephesus and Athens in Nero’s time when he foolishly encouraged celibacy among those cities’ unabashed sexual athletes. The fellow’s ascetical devotees possess rites and rules for every daily act. They sniff out fornication and abomination among us everywhere to condemn even the simplest pleasures.
Lysias continued with his testimony.
“Talk of penetration of an eromenos by his erastes is considered bad form. Yet what may occur between an erastes and eromenos in private or with others at drinking parties is entirely their own affair.
Both Antinous and I knew of many liaisons among our peers where screwing, fellatio, and other raunchy pleasures were the norm, with happy abandon. Lewd graffiti joyfully displayed on public walls about many couples makes that visible to see. Hot blood will simply have its bawdy way regardless of rules and conventions or the solemnities of ancient philosophers.
Yet to have heard the prospect of penetration voiced to his face by Hadrian would have disturbed Antinous. Nevertheless the emperor’s proposition moved onwards.
‘Antinous,’ Hadrian continued, ‘in Rome at your age you would already have been accorded the toga virilis, the dress code saying this lad is no longer a child but is now fecund, prod
uces seed, and can attain peak arousal. He is a vir of marriageable age for the breeding of legal sons. Mind you, an actual marriage contract might still be ten years off.
Rome encourages breeding among its citizens. A Roman wife is expected to deliver many sons to stock the Legions. So everything always leads to marriage.
Yet even though you have entered the mature age-class of a meirakion - the age where I had already served several year’s military service under my uncle Trajan - you are still part-formed as a man. Your physique proclaims the approach of man’s fullest estate, you can produce fertile seed to make strong sons, yet your experience lacks substance and skill.
So, Antinous, a special part of me yearns to be a teacher of life to you, as demanded of your tradition. To my eye you display the promise of a worthy challenge, and I aspire to that role in your life as your erastes.’
Antinous stood motionless beneath the moonlight, utterly silenced by Caesar’s monologue.
‘You blush, I see? Hadrian continued. ‘In truth, Antinous, you arouse the most admirable urges in a suitor which are at the same time intellectual, sociable, filial, and carnal. So I must speak plainly to you as your proposing erastes.’
Hadrian reached out to grasp my friend’s hand as he softly spoke.
‘Yes, Antinous, I wish to expand your horizons as your mentor in life, in battle, in the hunt, in philosophy, in the arts, in the sciences, in wealth-making, and in companionship. Just between us here, I desire to bring you the fullest enhancement of life as well as the fullest pleasure of sexual satisfaction. It would please me greatly to heighten your mind’s achievement and to enhance your body’s sensual enjoyment in the manner your custom sanctions.
This is – frankly – to live with you, to sport with you, to make you my close companion by day and my body’s intimate by night,’ Caesar concluded. ‘Yes, that includes enjoying sex with you. So tell me honestly, Antinous, what is your immediate response to my submission? I wish your response to be entirely of your own free will, without penalty. I do not demand it of you as your ruler.’
Hadrian then paused at last to assess his effect on my friend.
Antinous was evidently startled by the audacity of Hadrian’s proposal. I could see he was smitten with anxiety. Hadrian sensed this reserve and aimed to prompt him more encouragingly.
‘I, Caesar, possess the desire and the means to favor this potential in a worthy fellow like yourself,’ Hadrian entreated. ‘I am an admirer of the Greek system of education of a younger man by a maturer one. I admire the way this system has produced great writers, great poets, architects, philosophers, political leaders, and commanders of armies over the ages,’ he continued. ‘However, for myself, I have not to this day focused my affections on a single chosen companion in this manner. You are the first to enter my life in this way, Antinous.’
Hadrian paused thoughtfully as the focus of his dissertation stood ramrod straight before him. Caesar renewed his presentation.
‘There is, perhaps, a less obvious dimension to my proposal – but maybe the most important factor. I am ruler of the world yet I have no one to love, Antinous. I am ruler of the world yet no one is my lover. My station impedes the free flow of affection between me and others, except at the level of Imperial State allegiance. I am seen as a figurehead, not a human heart.
So I seek once again to have love in my life. I seek once again to be fond of a single particular person, not a multitude. Yet a multitude is my fate. My closest family has now passed away. Those of my blood I long loved are no more. You, Antinous, bring light into my heart, and though much of that light shines from your animal beauty, it is your nature, and vigor, and potential which attracts my favor.’
I could see my schoolchum was smitten with dismay by these confessions. I could also sense his interest had been fortified by their unexpected sincerity. Hadrian continued.
‘As Princeps it is now politic for me to bind myself to a relationship in the accepted Greek way with one single young man. I am married to a dutiful wife, Vibia Sabina Augusta, though she has borne me no children. I take no paramours even though I am in a position to do whatever I wish. Perhaps in my wilder days I did so, just as my predecessor Trajan had.
Instead, to conform to lawful behavior as the Empire’s pre-eminent citizen and its model of probity, it obliges me to be married to my single wife and now to retain a single young man as my consorts.’
Antinous was frozen in place and frozen in tongue. His ears were ringing, I am sure.
Hadrian continued.
‘Because I have no sons, Antinous, I will eventually legally adopt a patrician of Rome whose credentials are patently eligible to succeed me on that day when I too journey to my ancestors. Imperial succession-by-adoption has proven to be a safeguard against the defects of bloodline succession. It is a more mindful decision about eligibility than the accidents of dynastic birthright. The Imperium has had several bad experiences with bloodline succession, and very few good ones.
But my successor will certainly not be you, Antinous of Bithynia, because in our Roman way it cannot be someone of Greek descent. You must realize I have no intention of adopting you as my heir. If I did so you would be dead within a month, I’d say,’ Hadrian confirmed.
‘Yet I wish to locate a fitting companion to share my private life and my private bed for the years until, in accordance with the custom, my consort’s beard matures. I will then offer praises to Jupiter on that day when he trims his full beard sufficiently to sacrifice its cuttings, and so the consort relationship will cease. This is likely to be several years away for you, Antinous. In the meantime I have much to offer my chosen companion.’
Caesar rested his case for some moments.
‘I sense someone of your background is himself on a quest for his erastes? He seeks a companion-of-quality who will induct him into adult life? This companion will encourage his acquisition of wealth and property. He will fight side-by-side in his friend’s battles or blood feuds and support him in legal disputes. He will be Best Man at his wedding. He will be godfather and sworn protector to his friend’s children. And he will avenge his friend if malevolence befalls him. Above all, he will possess a special affection for his friend.
And I, young man, as an aspiring erastes am seeking a suitable eromenos to allow me full rein to express the Hellene side of my own nature. You, Antinous, are my chosen contender for this role.’
Antinous remained stiffly upright in the pale moonlight, rigid with wonderment if not sheer visceral terror. I am sure he had no idea his nocturnal meeting would lead to such a daunting proposition. He was now standing almost knee-to-knee to Hadrian.
Caesar continued.
‘I, Caesar, am Princeps, the First Citizen. I command the Empire’s citizens. I shape the world’s future. I make nations create themselves anew. I endow the Empire with tax money and public works to encourage it to become better than it has ever been. I have consolidated the borders with the barbarian races so the Pax Romana prevails to our benefit and our wealth grows unhindered by war or rebellion.
I bring Roman civilization to every corner of the Middle Sea and beyond. Rome brings law and order, we punish robbers and pirates, we guarantee the food supply despite famine, we build useful roads, aqueducts, public facilities, bath houses, sanitation, ensure clean water, provide games and festivals, protect safe travel and trade, and even secure justice for foreigners, debtors, widows, or slaves as well as Romans. I am the bringer of justice and the giver of justice.
To be engaged with me as Caesar is to be engaged with the mightiest of men in action of great honor. No Zeus with his Ganymede, no Apollo with his Hyacinth, no Patrocles with his Achilles, no Socrates with his Alcibiades, no Hephaestion with his Alexander, has ever been an erastes of the quality of your Caesar. I am the ultimate erastes to his chosen eromenos, Antinous. All this I offer you, and I offer you alone.
I could woo you with baubles and trinkets, fine clothes and perfumes, palaces, slaves, weapons, or a magni
ficent horse or two. They say everyone has their price. But I would think less of you if you conceded easily in this way. My informants tell me you would think less of me too.
No, I want your full-hearted commitment without coercion. I wish you of your own free will to accept my proposal, to invite me into your life as your erastes under the terms of the custom. I wish you to announce fearlessly to me : Yes Caesar, I am yours! Nothing less.
If the answer is No, for reasons of your own or your father’s, then I will send you safely on your way with sufficient reward to thank you for your attentiveness. This, Antinous, is my submission.’
Hadrian shut-up at last and waited for a reply. I am sure Antinous and I were both convinced Caesar rarely patiently awaits a response from his subjects, yet here in the moonlit calm of a deserted garden amphitheater outside Nicomedia he did so. Eventually Antinous found the presence of mind with a sufficiently emotion-rasped voice to speak.
‘Forgive me, sir,’ I heard him say in a challenge which alarmed me, ‘but I am certainly no prostitute. I am proudly born of a clan and a father who would disown me immediately, my lord, if it was believed I had sold my body for money or possessions or position. My honor among my peers would be permanently impugned. For the remainder of my days I’d be labeled as someone whose body, mind, and tongue are purchasable. I’d be denied society by my peers or a future role in our governing councils. This would be as death to me, my lord, and my father would be in his rights to kill me for it, as some do.
Yet your proposal has appeal, sir, I must confess. I am dismayed but truly flattered to be deemed so worthy. It leads me to ask: why me, sir? I am just a country boy, and there are finer lads in Bithynia with smoother talk or whiter skins who are equipped with a courtier’s wit or are expert in the boudoir’s special practices. I am not trained in the wiles of the Court, my lord, let alone the arts and speech of love or sex.’
I recall Antinous paused uneasily for a while to measure Caesar’s response to his hesitancy. Hadrian replied in low tones I could barely hear.
The Hadrian Enigma - A Forbidden History Page 16