by Ann Pino
“And in the meantime,” Alaina said, “Someone’s got to figure out how to get the milk out of this animal so we can stop that baby from screaming.”
“I’m game,” Cassie said. “How hard can it be?”
With Galahad holding the halter so the goat wouldn’t bolt, Cassie knelt beside the little animal and reached for a teat. They were strange-looking and furry, not at all like she had imagined they would be, and as soon as she touched one, the goat skittered away.
“Looks like someone needs to hold her tail, too,” Galahad said.
No one stepped forward to carry out this suggestion and Cassie tried again. This time she managed to get a teat, but when she squeezed it, nothing happened. She tried pulling, but the nanny brayed and made a nervous motion with her feet.
“Maybe we should bring the baby down here and have it suck the milk directly from the goat,” someone suggested.
“That would be gross,” someone else said.
A boy pushed his way through the group. “Let me try. I saw them do it on Lifestyle Swap once.
“You can’t learn to milk a goat by watching reality television,” Cassie said. Nevertheless, she stepped aside so he could take a stab at it. Unfortunately, he did no better.
Two girls tried after that, then a boy, and then Galahad, much to David’s amusement. Finally Sid came around a corner, having abandoned his radio to see what all the fuss was about. He approached the goat, rubbed its muzzle and examined its eyes. Then, with a grim set to his mouth, he set the plastic bucket in place and went to work. Soon he had almost a liter of fresh, foaming milk.
When he was done, he stood and wiped his hands on his pants. “We were poor back home in India.” His eyes scanned the group, defying comment. “I’ll do this for you three more times. Decide among yourselves who’s going meet me here to learn, because after that, you’re on your own.”
* * *
Later that night as she lay in Galahad’s arms, Cassie said, “So what did you trade for the goat? I mean the truth, not what you said down there.”
“I already told you.” With his finger, he traced a path on her bare stomach. “Mundo had a stash of trade goods he was keeping for emergencies. Liquor, cigarettes, guns…stuff like that.”
“So you really didn’t steal it?”
“Why would you think that?”
“Because that goat might produce enough milk for all the children, not just the baby. If we could’ve gotten something that useful before, why didn’t we?”
“Motivation. And the state of our alliances.”
“Then how come David says you stole it?”
Galahad stopped moving his hand across her skin. “David says too damn many things.”
“So is it true?”
Galahad rolled onto his back. “It didn’t come off as easy as I made it sound. I didn’t want to bore anyone with the details.”
“So you did steal it.”
“Not exactly. Let’s just say it wasn’t one of our cleaner trades.”
Cassie clutched a pillow to her chest. “For someone who claims to be so interested in civilization, you sure get yourself into unethical situations.”
“I know, but I didn’t want that poor kid to die and me not do everything I could to help. Sometimes you have to do wrong to do right.” He plucked the pillow from her arms and pulled her close. “You looked sweet holding that baby, by the way.”
“Don’t get any ideas.”
“I’m not. I already hate thinking how I’ll be leaving you alone when I die. I wouldn’t want to leave you with a kid, too.” He shifted position. “That’s why I worry maybe we shouldn’t keep doing this.”
Cassie sat up. This wasn’t some noble-sounding excuse to reject her, was it? “I haven't had my period in months.” She felt herself blush even though she wasn’t particularly embarrassed. “I’m too thin. The body shuts down reproduction when a person is starving.”
“So you’re saying I don’t need to forage condoms?”
“Not unless I gain a little weight.”
“That’ll be soon if I can help it. Wait here.”
Cassie lay back among the covers while Galahad padded into the kitchen. After a few minutes, he returned and her eyes widened in wonderment at the box in his hands. “Cocoa Puffs?”
“It was a good foraging day. It wasn’t easy to sneak this away, though.”
Cassie took the box reverently and broke open the inner bag. The cereal was stale, but tasted delicious. “Too bad we don’t have a little of that goat milk. We could pretend it’s a pre-Telo Saturday morning.”
“All we’d need is cartoons.”
She dug her hand back into the box. “This whole place is a cartoon. Just not a very funny one.”
They spent a pleasant half hour talking, eating slowly to make the treat last longer. At one point Galahad made Cassie lie on her back so he could place Cocoa Puffs on her breasts and naked belly and eat them off one by one. The one he lodged in her navel proved troublesome and Cassie giggled at his efforts with tongue and teeth. “You really are crazy, you know that?”
CHAPTER EIGHTEEN
Cassie tapped on the door of Doc’s room. “Open up. I can do this all day, you know.”
“Suit yourself,” came the muffled voice from inside.
“We need you in the clinic.”
“You can handle it without me.”
“Not if I’m standing here waiting for you to open this door.”
There was a sound of things being moved around, then of the interior lock being swung back. The door opened a few inches and Doc peeked out, pale and rumpled, with red, puffy eyes. “Satisfied? Now go the fuck away.”
He started to close the door but Cassie wedged her foot in the crack. “Stop this craziness. No one is mad at you. We want you to come back.”
“No.”
“You can’t walk away from your responsibilities just because you couldn’t save Nisha. You weren’t able to save the guy in a coma, either.”
“That was different. He was brought in that way.” He stepped back and let Cassie into the room. “I had months to figure out what to do with Nisha. I read up on eclampsia and seizures, but—”
Cassie waved a hand. “You didn’t have the tools to do the job. Move on. The baby needs you. Rochelle is overwhelmed and I can’t spend all day at the clinic. I have gardens to oversee and I have to go the library and get a book about goats.”
“Goats?” Doc frowned in confusion.
“We traded for one so we could have milk for the baby.”
“Is he drinking it?”
“So far.”
Doc sat on the edge of the unmade bed.
“Come back. It’s really okay.” Cassie ran a hand through her hair. What would entice him? “Zach is better.” At the flicker of interest in his eyes, she went on. “He’s sitting up now and able to eat a little. We gave him some cereal the guys foraged, mushed up in goat milk.”
“So the growth hormone does work.”
“Come see for yourself. The Pharms have May under surveillance, so she can’t come. You’re the only other one who knows what to look for.”
The excitement in his eyes dimmed. “You can take notes as well as I can.”
“No. I’ve got too much else to do.” She grabbed him by the wrist and pulled. “Quit hiding or people really will think you did something wrong.” She looked into his eyes. “Please? You called me your friend the other day. Would a friend lie to you?” She drew a plastic bag from a pocket. “I brought you this, since I figured you might be hungry.”
“Froot Loops?”
“Galahad and David had a good foraging day.”
Doc scooped the cereal into his mouth. “Okay,” he said. “Let me get cleaned up.”
* * *
Doc examined the baby in perfunctory fashion while Rochelle rattled off feeding times, how much he ate, how often he slept, and what the contents of his diapers looked like. She had taken over the nursery Nisha created and was
working through the baby books with gusto. If Doc was impressed by her maternal instincts, he gave no sign and instead just seemed glad he didn’t have to deal with the matter.
Zach was who he really cared about, and he spent a long time reading Cassie’s notes and checking vital signs. “This is amazing. It’s like the whole process went into reverse.”
“Didn’t you think that’s how it would work?” Cassie said.
“I actually thought it would produce stasis—no change—if it did anything at all. Instead it looks like the hormone masks whatever signal the virus gets from the telomeres, giving the body’s immune system a chance to fight back.”
“And it’s been one heck of a fight,” Zach said through lips that were still cracked and oozing. “I was expecting to see angels next time I opened my eyes. Either that or the devil.”
“You’re in hell. Trust me on that one.” Doc picked up Zach’s wrist so he could check his pulse.
“How long before I’m up and around?” Zach examined the bruises on his free arm, then wiped a bit of blood away from his nose. “I have a feeling I still look a little scary.”
Doc let go of Zach’s wrist and made some notes on his chart. “You’ll need awhile to heal completely. Your body’s priorities are on the inside first, then the outside. According to your chart, there’s still blood in your urine, indicating you’ve got problems with your kidneys. You’re not out of the woods yet.”
“But I’ll get there, right?”
Doc hesitated and glanced at Cassie before speaking. “This treatment is experimental. We don’t really know how long it will take for you to recover or how long your recovery will last.”
“So this could just be temporary?”
“Yes,” Cassie told him.
Zach considered. “I don’t know that I want to be your guinea pig. If this is something that’s going to wear off and I’m going to have to go through the hell of dying again, you should’ve just let me go.” At the stricken look on Doc’s face, he added, “Meaning no offense, of course. You’re a good guy, Doc, and I know you mean well. It’s just not what I would’ve chosen for myself, is all.”
“Not even for the greater good?” Cassie asked, feeling stupid even as she said the words.
“What good am I accomplishing, if you don’t mind my asking?”
“We found a way to slow the Telo,” Doc explained. “We think it holds the clue to the kidnappings by the Obits.”
“So I have to die twice so you can play detective?” Zach shifted his wasted form on his mattress. “You’re lucky I’m too tired to be pissed.”
They tried to reassure him, but Zach had nothing more to say. Doc and Cassie went into the next room to talk. By this point Doc was nearly in tears with frustration. “I should’ve never let May plant that crazy idea in my head. What was I thinking?”
“You thought you were doing him a favor,” Cassie said. “We all did.”
“The favor of being allowed to hope, so he can go through all that suffering again.” He pounded a table with his fist. “What’s wrong with me?”
“You saw someone dying and wanted to help. There’s nothing wrong with that.”
“But help how? ‘First, do no harm.’ Hippocratic Oath.”
“You took it?”
“Well, no. But—”
“Look, we can’t undo the past. There’s plenty of people who would’ve kissed your feet for a few extra hours and you’ve given Zach…how long?”
Doc shoved his fists in the pockets of his lab coat. “I don’t know. The research indicates a need for repeat doses to maintain the effect, but a rat’s lifespan is so compressed compared to that of a human that I don’t know how often he would have to re-dose.”
“Kids die all the time on the streets. If we keep our eyes open—”
“I don’t think so.” Doc shuddered. “Cutting up dead people isn’t something I want to start doing regularly.”
“So we’ll wait this out and take notes as things unfold.”
“Yeah.” Doc sank into a chair and buried his face in his hands.
Cassie hesitated, then put a hand on his shoulder. “You’re not a bad person.”
“No,” came Doc’s muffled voice. “I’m a research doctor, just like my father. Only unlike him, I don’t have the decency to ask my human subjects for permission.”
* * *
Cassie slipped the plastic bags of Cheerios into her backpack and stood up. Eleven was watching her with a cool gleam in his eye that tempted her to give him a piece of her mind about what he did to Rochelle. Being sworn to silence sucked. She signed the clipboard and went to the lobby to meet the guards who were going with her to the library.
The streets were empty, which was a relief at first, but became more nerve-wracking as they walked through block after block without seeing so much as a drunk street urchin. It had rained that morning just enough to turn the streets foul with greasy puddles and muck from the malfunctioning sewers. Coupled with the stench of garbage and bodies rotting in the rising heat, it was enough to make Cassie wish they could go back to the hotel and to hell with the goat.
They found the library abuzz with activity. Guards paced and fondled their weapons, glaring at the newcomers, while librarians and patrons moved restlessly in and out of the building, often with no books to show for all their comings and goings. The primly dressed girl who assessed Cassie’s bags of cereal seemed distracted, unwilling to set a firm price. She told her to get two or three books, or maybe four, and then they could discuss. Cassie’s guide inside the library was equally nervous, shining her flashlight in the wrong places and leading her seemingly everywhere except to where the books on livestock were shelved.
“Are you trying to keep me from finding what I’m here for?” Cassie asked. “If you don’t have books on goats or if you won’t let me borrow one, just say so.”
The girl ducked her head. “I’m sorry. I’m not thinking too good today. It’s okay to get a book about goats.”
“Where are they, then?”
She rubbed her forehead in confusion. “I don’t know. I mean, I do know, but—” she glanced around like a cornered animal, then crumpled to the floor in tears.
Cassie squatted beside her and patted her shoulder. “It’s okay. We’ll find them. It can’t be that hard.”
At Cassie’s touch, the girl set up a keening that carried through the stacks. Between wails, she blurted, “Plant Culture, SB, Forestry, SD, Animal Culture, SF, Fish—”
It took Cassie a moment to realize the girl was reciting call letters and by then two other librarians had come to investigate the noise. Cassie made a helpless gesture. “I didn’t mean to upset her. I only wanted a book about goats.”
One of the librarians shook her head. “Poor Anya. She shouldn’t be trying to work today.”
“We told her,” the other apologized to Cassie. “But she wanted to be brave.”
“Brave about what?”
“Her little sister was in a group that got picked up yesterday. We hoped it was just a slave run by the Pharms and we invited them over this morning to negotiate, but they said they don’t have our kids.”
With Anya still sobbing, Cassie mouthed the question, “Obits?”
The librarians nodded.
While one girl stayed behind to comfort Anya, the other took Cassie to the books on animal husbandry. Cassie perused the titles, barely able to concentrate as the librarian told her of the latest round of kidnappings. “We thought we were safe because the Obits haven’t ever traveled this far into the city. The Pharms usually leave us alone and the smaller groups don’t bother us because they need our knowledge.” She gave Cassie a significant look. “Did you know we’ve got this whole place wired? We can blow it up, burning all the books in it, if anyone tries to attack us.”
Cassie hadn’t known, and the thought made her anxious to finish her business and leave, lest someone detonate the explosives by mistake.
“We thought it was fine to let
our young ones play in the sculpture garden across the street. Our guards could see them and it was a way for them to get fresh air and sunshine. Children need sunshine to prevent rickets. Did you know that? We have a book that says so.”
Cassie did know. Ignoring the condescension, she pulled a book off a shelf and leafed through it. It contained information about several different goat breeds, but none of the pictures looked like the goat in the concierge office, so she put the book back on the shelf.
“I wasn’t there when it happened.” The librarian lowered her voice. “But our guards say a van pulled up and a bunch of guys in black jumped out. They grabbed some of our kids, shoved them into the van and took off before our people could confront them.”
“Sounds like Obits,” Cassie agreed. She selected a book about Nubian goats.
“The weirdest part…” she dropped her voice to a whisper and leaned in close. “Is that our guards say some of those guys looked like grownups.”
Cassie had been paging through the book, thinking the pictures were a good match to their own goat. Now she stopped reading and met the librarian’s eyes. “Are you sure about that?”
The girl shrugged. “I’m only sure that’s what our guards think they saw. The kids who didn’t get picked up say the same thing. Of course, what they actually saw could be something different. Maybe it was just wishful thinking.”
“No.” Cassie cradled the book to her chest. “If they really did see grownups, it would mean about the worst thing imaginable.” Before the librarian could ask her to elaborate, she added, “I think I have everything I need. I’d like to check out now.”
* * *
Cassie was excited to see the shuttle was back. She left Nubian Goats for Dummies on the concierge desk and ran to Conference Suite A. She needed to report to Mundo on what she had heard at the library. Then she would find Galahad and convince him to take her to the penthouse early. The thought of what might be happening to the library children was enough to turn her stomach and she needed Galahad’s reassuring touch to make things right.
To her surprise, David and Galahad were already in the conference suite, deep in conversation with Mundo. “Can it wait?” Mundo said. “This is a debriefing.”