by Milton Garby
"Whoa whoa, easy there Sara," she said, trying to keep her still. "You're talking too quick, can you slow down?"
The human took a large, unsteady breath and nodded. "Alright. Long story short when Yogg-Saron died, it reincarnated as me. I'm not possessed. I'm not stealing Old God powers. I actually am the amnesiac Old God of Death."
Leira's eyes went wide and she blinked. Her first urge was to scoot the hell away, but she remembered how she'd treated Sara about her faceless magic in Silithus and caught herself. Instead she just breathed heavily. "Wow. That's... quite something. So an Old God huh? What's it like?"
Sara shrugged. "Not really too different. It's... it's the memories really. Yogg-Saron knew lots of things. Lots of spells. Lots of ways to manipulate. Lots of ways to torture. Lots of everything, really. Apparently I'm never going to have an afterlife. I have an Old God soul, which is too, um, resilient to go to an afterlife. I'll just linger around like a spirit until my soul's destroyed or I find another body to possess, like I am now."
"You're possessing yourself," she deadpanned.
"Sort of. Yogg-Saron's idea was that whatever mortal reincarnation it had would find a way back to its body, and merge with it. There's a spell, I think, but it looks really complicated and I haven't looked at it too hard yet. And since everyone thinks Yogg-Saron's dead, nobody would anticipate it. I'd change back into an Old God, just as powerful as when I died, but with nobody there to fight me. In less than ten seconds I'd be able to cast the life extinguishing spell, and then... well then I guess Yogg-Saron would do whatever the hell it wants for the rest of time. That was its plan, anyway."
Sara had been so pale. Like she'd been attacked by a ghost. Leira made sure to emphasize her hug. "Hey, it's alright Sara. You're not Yogg-Saron right now, you're human okay? A human with incredible and scary powers, but a human. Nothing is going to force you to destroy the world, okay?"
She sighed. "But... that's the thing." Under Leira's arms and despite the sweaty heat of the furnace, she shivered. "I want to, Leira."
What.
"While coming to Ironforge I was looking at its memories. I looked at what Azeroth was like under the Old Gods' rule. And it's like... like I've been eating cardboard all my life and suddenly there's a way for me to eat a cake. I wouldn't need to wait for storms and take shelter to watch them, I could whip up supercells whenever I want and observe them with impunity. I wouldn't need to crush raccoons to work out my frustrations, I could torture entire cities. I could stop... stop worrying about people finding out about my mind control and killing me because I'd be the top of the food chain. I'd have the power, I'd make the rules, nothing would ever put my life in danger ever again!" she said, half whispering it like she was almost asleep.
"But," she continued weakly. "But if I turn back into Yogg-Saron, then what about you? What about Mom, or Dad?" she asked, her voice cracking. "And what if it lied? I know I would. What if when I change back, my memories here and now, are just wiped clean and Yogg-Saron dominates me? Looking at what it gave me that wouldn't happen but it could lie about that. My soul'd still be intact but I would die, Leira, and so would everyone else. Take it from me; the people alive today wouldn't last long under an Old God's rule."
"So don't do it!" Leira said. It seemed pretty obvious to her. "If there are all these things you' re worried about then it's simple, don't go Old God." She punched Sara lightly in the arm. "Hey, come on. Chin up, deep breath. You're doing fine right now, aren't you?"
"But I could do better, I want it so much, I want it so badly it hurts, Leira. But I'm scared. I don't know what to do," she whimpered.
And that was it. That was the ugly truth about Sara that Leira could so often gloss over. She was cruel. She liked torturing animals, then resurrecting them just so she could keep torturing them. She had no problem with mind controlling people into unthinking slaves to get what she wanted, with reading their every private thought. She giggled when storms blew in and when streets flooded, when houses burned. Sara thrived off pain and misery, and it was only for whatever reason that she'd made an exception for Leira during their younger years. But everyone else wasn't as fortunate. At best, they were nobodies to Sara. At worst, they were stress balls. And her explanation about what she'd found in Ulduar made sense in light of those facts.
Sara was not a good person.
She was limited because she wasn't all powerful. Sara was one of the bigger fish in the pond, but she wasn't a shark and she behaved lest she get their attention. But if she suddenly didn't have to worry about the Alliance, about the Horde, about all the neutral guilds and factions, about the Aspects and the demons, then... well, she did just say she was an Old God.
And here she was openly admitting to Leira that she wanted to destroy the world.
Taking a deep breath, she turned her glowing eyes to the door. "Sara, I'm not going to lie. This is so far beyond what I'm qualified for. I'm a twenty-four year old warrior in a little guild in Ironforge with a broken arm. I don't know anything about Old Gods other than the fact that they want to kill me and everything I hold dear."
"I don't want to kill - "
"Be quiet," she chided, retracting her left hand. "I don't know how to explain to you that I really like Azeroth not turned inside out, I don't know how to explain to you that wanting to destroy it is abhorrent, that you shouldn't want to because why? I don't know what it's like to be you, I can just guess. But." She sighed. "Okay, here's the deal. You want to destroy the world, but you're worried about the four of us, right? I'm flattered. All I can really say is, go take a walk around and ask yourself if things are really that bad. Are you willing to risk my life, your parents' lives, your life, just to be able to make a few extra earthquakes?"
Slowly, the warlock nodded. "Alright, I'll give it a shot." Suddenly she looked over at her. "Leira, do you have any stationary? I need to write to my folks."
Leira pointed to the shelf. "Right over there."
"Thanks." Sara stood and walked over to it, grabbed the equipment, and started writing. "And... I'll think about what you said." She laughed tiredly. "Thanks for putting up with me, Leira. Even if I am a sadistic, psychopathic soul-eating eldritch tentacle god."
Sara
The next day, Sara found herself in Stormwind. She had taken the Deeprun Tram and slept during the ride, which was a uniquely horrible experience.
She'd dreamed, too. Or rather, remembered her past life. She'd seen the world through a sliver of Yogg-Saron's perspective, watching as it ate the souls of those its servants sacrificed to it. She remembered the taste, the disgusting rush of power, the way the silvery streaks were stretched thin and torn asunder under the Old God's magic, and she'd woken up hungry.
She had breakfast in a little pub. She'd sat in a corner booth, giving death glares to anyone who moved in her direction, and ate a simple meal that tasted so bland compared to the magical flavor of souls that human tongues had no way of registering.
What was she going to do? She didn't know. Walking around Stormwind, with her hair color disguised as blonde, Sara found her gaze wandering. Canals that she pictured boiling, or filled with lava. Shops that she imagined letting loose her magic upon.
An Old God. She was an Old God. Everything about Sara, from her hair to her fingers to her feet, was just some body she had hijacked before it could even develop a soul of its own. A suit made to hold in the roiling, unfathomable powers of Yogg-Saron. Her magic. Her likes, her interests. All of it made so much sense in the light of this new knowledge.
Even her name, Sara, was identical to what Yogg-Saron called its vrykul projection. Small world.
The temperature was moderate and the streets were lightly sun-kissed. Sara imagined what it would be like to turn the skies red, or purple, or white. To enslave air elementals and create a storm the likes of which hadn't been seen in sixty thousand years. To never have to fear for her safety ever again. To be able to single-handedly crush the entire Burning Legion.
But could she ri
sk it? If she changed back into an Old God, she had so much to gain... but everything to lose. Maybe Leira was right. She had a good life here. And to make things better, all the vast, phenomenal knowledge of an Old God was at her fingertips. She could study its magical knowledge for centuries and still not come close to scratching the surface. There were all sorts of spells Yogg-Saron knew, all sorts of problem solving tools and equations. For instance, while searching for a portal in Dalaran she'd developed a spell that could instantly destroy every demon on the planet.
The only problem was everyone on the planet put together didn't have enough mana to pull it off. Scaled down versions were possible, but still hideously impractical.
But even without the whole 'instant win' spell there was so much she could learn. So much damage she could do. Sure the spells were complicated at first glance, but she didn't need to understand their every detail, she just needed to cast them. Of course it'd be pretty damn easy to cast them if she went back into her old body. And even if she stayed as a human, her soul was immortal. After dying she'd just find another vessel to possess. If she died; she was fairly certain that there was an immortality spell somewhere in Yogg-Saron's vast treasure of wisdom.
People walked around her. She barely noticed them. Rations were probably being handed out. It didn't matter. She could teach herself how to conjure permanent food, and while she'd never cast an arcane spell in her life it couldn't be hard with an Old God's memories giving her pointers. After all, Yogg-Saron had cast frost magic while using the Sif projection.
And the mind control techniques. So many mind control techniques. Sara hadn't even scratched the surface of how to manipulate people. Precise memory replacement. Hormone balancing. Body temperature control. So much she could figure out. And it wasn't like she couldn't figure it out on her own; she had figured it out, then died and forgotten it all, but now she could teach herself again.
She found herself in Old Town, meandering down the streets towards the barracks. She found herself in a room filled with training dummies, open to the public. Figures of straw and wood surrounded her, with frowning faces painted on their heads, holding ineffectual wooden swords and shields. Rooted in place, utterly helpless to fight back against her.
With both hands at her sides, she flicked her fingers up and a green, shimmering barrier of magic surrounded her. That was another spell she could improve. She'd figured out a basic shielding spell on her own, but she could make it an immunity spell. It would block more than just projectiles. Blasting spells, curses, afflictions, she would remain unscathed as long as it wasn't dispelled.
Sara shook her head. Focus. She was here to try... why was she here? Because she'd wandered there while trying to figure out what to do with the knowledge that she was the Old God of Death. There was a spell she wanted to try, an improvement over shadow bolts. A blast of shadow magic that would harm and actually, actively try to drive the target insane. But instead of focusing on the psychosis spell she felt like just... like just... !
"RRRAAAAAA!" she shouted, hideous amounts of magic swirling along her arms and exploding outwards in the form of a colossal, unrefined shadow nova, sweeping her shield away. When the clinging mist of her shadow magic cleared, she saw that every one of the reinforced dummies had been torn asunder. Good. Her magic was many times weaker than when she'd been standing next to the corpse of Yogg-Saron, but it was good to know she was still as powerful as when she got on a boat to Kalimdor what seemed like a lifetime ago. She turned around and walked out of the door, letting her feet carry her to wherever.
After an hour or so, smoke and fire filled her nose. The Dwarven District, huh? She didn't go there often. Crowds bustled around her, carrying metals and materials, bashing hammers all around her, slag and sparks flying about in the corners of her vision. Sara didn't care.
What was she going to do?
She was Yogg-Saron. It was practically her destiny to change back into an Old God. That was literally the entire reason she existed, so she could finish up what she'd nearly finished in her past life. But if she changed back...
... she couldn't. She had to. She wanted to. She shouldn't.
From the Dwarven District she ended up walking around Stormwind Lake. The waters were still and calm, reflecting the sun above. Grass swayed in the breeze, and trees rustled their branches as wind drifted through them. Insects and birds buzzed and sang in the distance, and the air smelled of humid flowers. It was the perfect scene of peace and harmony, and Sara had to fight the urge to turn it upside down.
In the middle of the lake was a small island, where shamans and members of the Earthen Ring gathered around some binding stones to do... whatever it was shamans did. To the left was another island, with Pandaren structures built onto it. She could make out one or two figures near the lakes in that direction, probably monks training.
She could go there, and probably get some 'deep spiritual advice' from them that would make everything just right because suddenly she'd understand what to do with herself. Or she could not go there.
Sara found a comfortable seat on the lake shore and sat in it. There was some sand between the blades of grass, but the sun felt nice on her face and the wind ruffled her hair pleasingly. She closed her eyes and started hypnotically swaying in place as she thought over the dilemma.
She had to think this over calmly and logically. What was her problem?
Sara was the Old God of Death reincarnated. She wanted to destroy the world and rule Azeroth in unending madness for the rest of time. At the same time, doing so would hurt her loved ones badly, and there was a chance she herself would die. But she still yearned to unmake Azeroth.
So the problem was she wanted to do something, but if she did it the people she cared about would be hurt.
What was the first solution that came to mind? The first solution Sara could think of was to mind control herself, make herself not care about them, or not want to destroy the world. Either one. Unfortunately there were some... technical details with her magic, so she couldn't do it to herself. Sara wasn't about to trust someone else to change her thought lines either.
But maybe she could do something with that. The problem was a conflict of interests, so she simply needed to get rid of one of the interests.
If she stopped caring about the three people in her life, then she could return to Yogg-Saron's body and rule Azeroth. She could have whatever she wanted, whenever she wanted. If she didn't die in the process. She could lose everything or gain everything, and that was too much of a gamble even for her to take.
The other option was to... make it so she didn't want to unravel the planet. That was the safer option, and Sara could certainly do with some safety after what she'd been through. Maybe that was the thing to do. Start being nice to people, treat them like they were actually relevant, even if it meant giving up on dancing mountains, giving up on being worshiped, giving up on eating souls, of being invincible.
Maybe she could just wait. Her soul was all but indestructible and if she waited long enough, she could outlive her parents. She could, eventually, outlive Leira. Then it was a simple matter of going back to her old body... and she might still die when she did.
So it was decided then. Sara would have to teach herself to be kind, caring, noble. Not just the facade of it either, but to genuinely be a model citizen. Still sitting by the lake, she frowned. Ugh, already the idea made her feel nauseous. But how to best go about it?
... Sara drew a blank. She just didn't know. Maybe she should just go and try. But there had to be something else she could do in the meantime.
Her eyes opened and she grinned wickedly. That was right. She had all the knowledge of Yogg-Saron at her disposal. With that she could hurt the demons, hurt them in ways that reforming their bodies wouldn't help. Her thoughts began racing: what if she could fight the Legion and train herself to see the best in people at the same time? She knew just the way!
Sara stood and turned around, heading back to the Dwarven Distric
t.
It was time to join a guild!
Sara
The ride back to Ironforge was just as miserable as the ride to Stormwind.
Sara leaned back on a seat as the Deeprun Tram sped by at dizzying speeds. Above her, columns of water sped by, separated from her by only a layer of glass. If the tram were slower she likely could have made out fish, plants, and rock formations, but as it was she was traveling incredibly fast. There were a few other passengers, but they were all on the cars in front of her, giving her a car all to herself. Such a shame.
Deciding not to waste her time, Sara spent the trip going over how to cast the spell she had in mind. The spell matrix was incredibly complex, and while the theory alone would take her weeks to fully understand, imitating it was less of a task. It was superior to a shadow bolt in every way save for simplicity. It was more damage for less mana, and the part that really intrigued her was that, if she hit the head, it would use its power to begin rearranging the victim's thought lines. There was a mathematical formula that Yogg-Saron had used to create the spell; everything with a mind would be affected by the spell. They would be increasingly driven to see Sara as an ally, and their allies as enemies. They'd go insane.
It was something that demons couldn't recover from just by reincarnating. Even if she didn't fully sway them, they'd be jumpy and nervous and doubtful.
Still lying on the Deeprun Tram, she held up her left hand and let violet Old God magic swirl between her fingers. She put the spell together piece by piece, minute by minute. There weren't many safe places to aim it, and testing the madness inducing effects would be tricky, but Sara was on the back-most car so she aimed her magic out the back and unleashed the psychosis spell.