“What the—” I shouted before realizing it was Max. “I didn’t hear you come in.” He just held me tight, my back to his front, his face buried in the crook of my neck. He swayed back and forth with me for a minute before pressing a kiss to my neck and letting me go. I turned to face him. His eyes lacked the sparkle I had come to expect in them. His mouth dipped at the corners, lines marring his face. “What’s wrong?”
“I don’t even know where to start, Kar.”
“The bid?”
He shook his head. “We lost it. I don’t know how, but we did.”
“Oh, baby,” I whispered, wrapping my arms around his waist. “I’m sorry. I know you were hoping to get that.”
“I’ll have to go in early tomorrow and make some calls. I know it’s Saturday and we were supposed to go hiking, but I have to try to get something else figured out. Cane’s busy with Jada, so I’m trying to take the pressure off of him.”
I rested my cheek against his chest. “Cane called here earlier and asked me to stay with Jada tomorrow. He said she wasn’t feeling good and he needed to be in the office all day.”
“That’s a good plan.”
We stood like that for a while. “You hungry or anything?” I asked.
“That’s something else . . .” His chest rumbled as he spoke. “Samantha wants us to go out to dinner tonight with her and some guy she’s dating.”
I squeezed my eyes shut, the thought of spending an evening with her—date or no date—didn’t sound all that appealing. It occurred to me, however, that if she was with a date, maybe that was a good thing to support. If she had a man, she’d have less interest, theoretically, in mine.
“If you don’t wanna go, we won’t go. End of story,” he mumbled into my hair. “She just wanted me to check this guy out for her. And it’ll save us from cooking anything. I’m tired as hell and I know you probably are, too.”
I couldn’t argue that either. With a heavy sigh, I said, “It’s fine. Let’s keep it casual, though. I don’t have the energy for something dramatic.”
KARI
A couple of hours later, we pulled into Maisano’s. Max led me into the restaurant looking edible himself in a pair of khaki pants and a black Polo shirt. He smelled all outdoorsy and wonderful and I wished for a split second we were home alone.
Without the Polo shirt and khakis.
Max gave the hostess our name and we were seated in the back of the restaurant. The hostess said she’d bring Sam and her date back when they arrived.
I looked around the room, large and airy with a very romantic, ethereal feel. Light pinks and warm grays decorated the walls in abstract paintings and art. It had been my favorite place since Max brought me here on our first date. I giggled as I recalled the night we met.
“What are ya laughing at?” he grinned.
“Remember the first night we came here?”
He leaned back in his chair, his dimple shining in his cheek. “I do. It was my payment for fixin’ your car.”
“I remember watching you walk across that parking lot,” I said, my eyes widening. “I’d never felt my luck change from bad to good so quickly before.”
He chuckled, the low sound reverberating through my body. “I was mad at Cane for dumping that project in my lap that morning. And then I find this sexy little firecracker all stranded.”
“Thank God for small favors.”
“No kiddin.’” He tilted his head, a slow, sexy smile sliding across his lips. “That was one of the best days of my life.”
I felt my cheeks heat under his gaze, his words would’ve been just as true coming out of my mouth. Meeting Max Quinn had changed my life in so many ways. I had gone hiking that day to stop from crying. It had been the anniversary of one of the saddest days of my entire life. I had pulled myself up off the floor of the bathroom that afternoon, climbed to the top of Pinnacle Peak, and just zoned out. I didn’t pray a lot, not as much as I always thought I should, but I prayed that day. I felt so low, so down and I was afraid that depression would settle back over me as it had in the past. I had prayed for direction, for guidance, for something to soothe my soul. I had talked to my mom and asked her to help, then I laughed at myself for thinking that. There was no way a deceased person could help. Then I had laughed harder because maybe they could—how did I know? By the time I made it back down the mountain, I had felt a touch of peace. More than I had felt in a very long time . . . at least until my car didn’t start.
That was the best thing that had ever happened to me.
“I love that dress on you.” Max leaned towards me a bit. He looked tired but happy. “The green makes your eyes look like emeralds.”
I looked down at the dress I had bought a few weeks before but never worn. I complimented it with a gold bracelet and gold hoop earrings. I left my brown hair straight and it hung to the middle of my back.
“I’d love it more on the floor of our bedroom right about now,” he grinned, his pupils dilating.
“We can always go,” I said nonchalantly. “I’m open to the idea.”
He chuckled again, leaning back. “Let’s eat fast and get out of here. I just need a quick glance at this guy Sam’s dating.”
Resigned to our fate, I sat back in my chair, too. “What do we know about this guy?”
He shrugged. “I think his name is Briar or something. Sam just wants to make sure she’s not wasting her time on him. She thinks he’s in love with an ex-girlfriend, I think.”
“Ex-issues aren’t good.”
“Nah, they aren’t. But this guy’s ex, I guess, aborted his baby and didn’t tell him. So that kind of screwed with his head.”
My heart lurched in my chest at the thought. “I’d imagine it would screw with him. Maybe Sam should back off. It sounds like he needs to work things out with his ex—find some peace or something.”
What am I saying? No! No, I want her with this guy and her sights off Max!
“Or,” I continued hurriedly, “maybe she is looking too much into things.”
“We’ll see,” Max said with amusement. The corners of his lips turned up and I knew he saw right through me.
I looked across the restaurant and saw the hostess heading our way. I could see Sam’s blonde curls behind her. “They’re here,” I said as sweetly as I could.
Max sat up in his seat as they approached. “Don’t get overly chatty tonight. I need that dress on the floor as soon as possible.”
The seriousness in his tone made me laugh. “No worries there, babe.”
“The rest of your party is here,” the hostess said, stepping out of the way. “Your server will be right with you. Enjoy your evening.”
“Hey!” Sam smiled happily. “It’s good to see you guys.”
Max rose and pulled out her chair, which she accepted with a wide grin. “Thank you, Max.” He eyed me cautiously, letting me know he was just being polite. I fought against rolling my eyes. “Kari,” she said, turning towards me, “you look pretty tonight.”
“Thank you,” I said as nicely as I could. “I love that color on you.”
She looked down at her powder pink dress. “Thanks. I don’t love pink, but I loved the way this fit.”
“So,” Max said, clearing his throat. I looked at him and he mouthed “chatty,” making me laugh. He shook his head and turned his sights on Samantha. “Where’s he at?”
“He had to take a quick call. I know it’s so rude, but he’s been waiting on it all day. He’ll be here in a second.”
“How did you meet him?” I asked, figuring we may as well make small talk.
“At a bar. But it’s not what you think,” she laughed, tossing her curls behind her shoulder and pressing her lips together. “He was there with a client and I was there . . . well, I was there with Brielle with less honorable intentions,” she winked. “Oh, there he is now.”
I followed her eyes across the room to the tall, dark headed man walking towards us.
I grabbed the edges of my ch
air to keep myself from falling.
I couldn’t breathe.
My heart stopped beating.
Blaine!
KARI
He was shoving his phone in his pocket with one hand, running his other through his hair like he did when he was nervous. He had on black dress pants and a blue dress shirt that I already knew was the same color as his eyes.
He looked a bit older than he had the last time I had seen him. His hair was shorter and his skin had more color, which surprised me with the skin cancer that ran in his family. He was always so careful to stay covered in the sun.
I couldn’t move, frozen to my seat. I gripped the chair with every bit of strength I had, knowing I’d fall out of it if I didn’t. I expected to feel the sting of tears, a surge of anger or sorrow or something, but I didn’t. I felt numb. Unable to feel anything, really. It was surreal.
Blaine walked to the table, his gaze trained on Samantha. He sent her a small smile, one that I knew was telling her that he didn’t really want to be here. I wondered if she knew it.
I forced my eyes closed, knowing that when I opened them, everything in my life would be different. And, quite possibly, ruined. These last few seconds very well might be the last few happy moments of my life, the last moments before things were sent into a chaotic spiral.
Fuck. My. Life.
I forced a swallow passed my rickety breaths and against the uneven beats of my heart before opening my eyes. Max was looking right at me, an uncertain look on his face. An eyebrow cocked, I saw the look pass across his features when he realized that something was really wrong.
Before I was ready, if there would ever be a time that I was ready, a voice familiar to me on so many levels broke the silence. I knew that sound in the early morning, what it sounded like angry, the sound of it breaking with sorrow. I knew the pitch it took when he was telling a secret, the deep timbre of it as he came down from an orgasm, the intimacy that was laced through it as he promised the world.
“Hey, Sam,” Blaine said.
I tore my gaze from Max’s, unable to look him in the eye. I glanced up at the face I hadn’t seen for so long, the face I would’ve given anything to see so many days and nights. The face that had been the star of my dreams and my nightmares just the same.
“Hey, Blaine.” Sam’s voice sounded miles away. “This is Max,” I heard her tell him.
He looked to Max, his Adam’s apple bobbing. He hated meeting new people. “Hey,” he said nervously.
“And this is Kari,” Sam said sweetly.
He turned towards me in what seemed like slow motion. I couldn’t smile or frown or even act surprised. I just . . . waited.
He opened his mouth to give the standard “hello,” but he realized a split second before anything got passed his lips what was happening.
His handsome features were swept with a look of incredulousness. His forehead creased, his eyes adjusting as if he were seeing an apparition. He shook his head a second. “Kari?” he asked breathlessly.
I swallowed again, trying to paint the walls of my throat with something to keep them from cracking. The room began to spin.
“Oh, hell,” he said, gripping the back of his seat, not looking away.
I couldn’t look away, either. I had wished to see him so many times—some of those times to hold me again and some of them so I could beat the shit out of him. And now here he was, at the absolute wrong time. At the time I didn’t want to see him. In front of Max. Just when my life was beginning to go right. When things were starting to come together.
The room spun harder and I closed my eyes, forcing myself to breathe.
“Kari?” I heard him ask again, the disbelief just as heavy in his voice this time. “What are you doing here?”
“Do you two know each other?” I heard Max say.
“Yeah, that’s my fia—” Blaine began before catching himself. “You okay, Kari?”
I felt his hand rest on my shoulder.
Just get out of here.
“Yeah, I’m good,” I said, scooting my chair back and avoiding the eyes of everyone at the table. “I’m just not feeling really well right now.” I grabbed my purse off the floor and tossed it over my shoulder.
“Kari?” I heard Max and Blaine say, their voices lacing together and threatening to throw me into a fit of hysteria. The irony was almost too much.
I threaded my way to the front of the restaurant and through the front doors, the cool air hitting me in the face. I knew that I was being followed and I walked as fast as I could, fighting off the madness that was trying to boil up and over the confines of my control.
I spotted Max’s truck and instinctively made my way to it. I just got to the door when I heard his voice behind me. “Sweetheart? What’s going on?”
When I turned around, he was just standing there, concern etched across his handsome features. He reached for me and I wanted him to fold me into his arms, protect me from the world. From Blaine. From the things that had shattered me from the inside out. But I couldn’t do that because it would only ruin him now, too.
MAX
What the hell just happened?
She stood there looking wild and defeated, all at the same time. Kari was this paradox, a mixture of hot and cold, love and hate, agitation and salve, but this was different. This was laced with so much fear I could smell it. Taste it. Feel it.
Everything happened so damn fast I wasn’t sure what was going on. We were laughing and talking and then he came and she took off. It was obvious they knew each other, but in what capacity? Knots were forming in my stomach, multiplying by the second.
“You okay, baby? What’s the matter?” I took a tentative step towards her.
She looked over my shoulder and then down at the asphalt. “I want to go,” she whispered.
I dug in my pocket for the keys to unlock the doors. “Okay. We’ll go then.”
“Kari? What are you doing here?” Sam’s date walked up beside me. “Are you okay?”
She didn’t respond for a long moment. I could see her gather her resolve and when she looked back up, the wall was across her eyes. “Yeah. I’m good.” She looked from Blaine to me. “Can we go now, Max? Please.”
I pushed the unlock button and Kari yanked open her door.
Blaine took a step forward and grabbed the door. “Wait a minute. You can’t just leave.”
I took a step towards him. I didn’t really know who he was to her, but he wasn’t going to tell her what she was gonna do. Boy better learn some manners.
“You need to back off,” I said firmly. I didn’t want to pull a Cane, but I suddenly understood him in a way I never had before. The night he beat the shit out of Simon Powers when he found out that Simon had grabbed Jada, I thought maybe he went overboard. But now I realized that if this bastard grabbed Kari, I’d do more damage than Cane ever thought about.
“And who are you?” he asked me, raising his eyebrows. His posture changed immediately, his back stiffening.
“Better watch your tone.” I cocked my head, not the least bit intimidated by this little shit. “I’m her boyfriend. Who the hell do you think you are?”
“I used to be her fiancé,” he said, his voice challenging me.
Fiancé?
I looked to Kari, her skin going white. I looked down at Blaine. While that explained a little, it didn’t matter now, and it was time he knew that.
“Well, I am her man now. You need to be on your way.”
“Oh my God!” Samantha exclaimed behind me in disbelief, but everyone ignored her.
Kari’s eyes filled with tears, her bottom lip quivering.
“Kari,” Blaine said, his voice chock full of emotion. “Look, now that we’re face-to-face, let’s talk. There’s so much to discuss . . .”
She shook her head sadly, breaking my heart. “There’s nothing to talk about. Max,” she turned to me, “let’s go home.”
I nodded and she climbed into the truck, Blaine watching her every m
ove. I knew he was itching to reach out and touch her, to grab ahold of her. Good thing he had some sense.
I shut the door closed behind her and turned around. “See ya at work,” I nodded to Sam before looking at Blaine.
Sam stood silently, her jaw wide open. Blaine’s eyes were glued to the passenger side seat of my truck.
I started to walk to the driver side, but stopped mid-step and turned around. “Whatever happened between you two was then. This is now. Ya hear me? You mess with my girl and you’ll be a sorry sonofabitch.”
With one final look at Kari through the window and a quick, irritated glance at me, he made the right decision and turned on his heel and walked away.
KARI
Max climbed in the truck, started it, and took off towards the house.
He didn’t say a word.
His jaw was working overtime and he took off his hat and tossed it into the backseat, running his hands through his hair.
He didn’t even look at me.
I was in too much shock to say anything, my brain too clouded to even process what I should do or say or what this little meet-and-greet meant for my future. For Max’s future. For our future . . . or a lack thereof.
This might just be the evening that things come to an end with Max.
My mind traveled back to the afternoon that things came to a sudden halt with Blaine. Images of his face when I told him the news flashed through my memory like a wrecking ball. The words he spat at me. The way the door sounded when he left and the sound of it opening again a few days later. The hope that snuck in my heart through the cracked pieces when he walked into our bedroom. The look on his face, the look of dejection that demolished any remaining pieces of my heart into splinters.
The sound of the closet opening and the zipper of his bags as he pulled them open. The coat hangers jangling on the metal rods as he took his stuff out of the closet. The sound of my sobs filling in the dead spaces.
The Perception Page 15