“The beauty is in the equality. We all face it.” Lochlan straightened. “Even the immortals may die eventually.”
“That doesn’t mean it’s beautiful.” Not by a long shot. “And it’s not equal. Some people live long lives. Others live short ones. How is that equal?”
“Beauty is in the eye of the beholder.” Bryant patted my head like I was dog.
“Well, from my eyes it’s not beautiful.”
“Which is a shame.” Lochlan frowned. “You should have been raised with an appreciation for death.”
“You can blame my grandfather for that decision. Not me.”
“For him to have chosen the path he did, he must have felt desperate. There is no other reason he’d have withheld your true identity.” Lochlan appeared pensive. “One day we’ll understand his reasons.”
“He withheld everything from me.” Everything. He even let me believe my father was dead. No matter how bad a guy my father was, I still deserved to know he existed, even if just to prepare myself.
“Ok. Enough of this. Regret, guilt, anger at your caregiver. That doesn’t help us.” Bryant shook his head. “You need to connect with the dead girl.”
“You mean it doesn’t help you.” I was being reckless again. Hearing Netta’s voice had made Bryant’s threats less potent for one reason or another.
“Or you. What does reflecting on what could have been do for you?” Bryant asked. “Think before you answer. This isn’t about what you think you should say, but what you actually know to be true. Now, snap out of this and try to find the girl. If you want to view it as getting her justice, then do that. I don’t care. Just do it.” Bryant wrung his hands.
Despite my doubts and fears, I wanted to. I wanted to connect with Netta again to figure out who she was and try to help her. I knew I couldn’t really help her by bringing her life back, but Lochlan had a point about justice. Well, assuming she was murdered. She was. That thought echoed through my head.
“We’re going to start driving again. I’ll watch you closely. Try to communicate with us if you can.” Lochlan made it sound so simple.
“Is there a way to communicate with you when I’m in that floating state?”
“Yes and no.” Lochlan gestured with his hands as if they were a scale.
“Meaning?”
“Meaning there is, but it’s going to take more than a few minutes to learn.”
“I’d feel better if there was an easier exit.” I’d had no clue how to get out last time, and discovering I’d been convulsing didn’t make me feel any better about it.
“We’ll pull you out if it gets bad,” Bryant promised.
“I want Ian.” If they were so desperate to get me to do this then I’d make my own demands.
“The bear?” Bryant raised an eyebrow. “Why would you ask for him now?”
“You care that deeply for a bear?” Lochlan looked at me with concern.
“Why does it matter? It’s personal.” I knew I wasn’t in the position to keep anything personal in my current situation, but so far Lochlan had been reasonably respectful so I didn’t think he’d be pushing for that kind of information.
“Because it means a pack is trying to align with you.”
“Ian didn’t know what I was. He isn’t trying to do any aligning.” I believed him completely on that. I had lots of questions for him and things to figure out, but whether Ian was using me for my Séancer abilities wasn’t one of them.
“Don’t believe it.” Lochlan’s eyes darkened. “There’s always a reason. Besides with who your father is…”
“My father owed another pack money. Hence how Bryant got involved and how I’m here.”
“They may be working together. Don’t be so quick to believe a man just because he whispers sweet nothings in your ear.”
“Is that what you think?” I leaned back and away from him. “That I’m falling for some act?” Lochlan thought less of me than I realized.
“I have lived long enough to see this same thing happen many times.”
“Just because something has happened before doesn’t mean it happens every time.”
“It makes it likely.”
“Since she isn’t getting the bear, this conversation is pointless.” Bryant shook his head. “Enough.”
“Then why should I do it?”
“Do I have to get mean again?” Bryant pushed Lochlan out of the way from where he stood leaning inside the car. “I said you aren’t getting the bear now, do you ever want to see him again? I’d think long and hard about how you phrase your response.”
I nodded. “Okay.”
“Okay you’re going to try to connect with the girl again?”
“Sure. I don’t have a choice.”
“I said to be careful how you phrase your answer.” Bryant’s eyes started to turn black.
I closed my eyes, waiting for whatever was coming. But nothing did. Instead the door slammed closed, and they didn’t put the bandana back on.
“I am available if you need me.” Lochlan’s promise was less reassuring now. He’d questioned Ian and his feelings for me and that hurt. I needed to believe my relationship with Ian was real because it was the only thing getting me through. Now that I knew Connor had been just as big of a liar as my grandfather I certainly didn’t trust him. I was alone in the world, and that was terrifying. If Ian didn’t truly care about me, then would anyone have cared about me at all? Probably not.
Did anyone care about Netta? I assumed someone did. I wasn’t sure how long ago she died, but at some point there had to have been people waiting for her.
I closed my eyes and tried to reach out. Nothing happened. Once again that exercise got me nowhere. Clearly I wasn’t ready to reach out and find anyone on my own. I’d have to go with the floating technique again and hope I came upon Netta. I also hoped I wouldn’t come upon anyone else. I wasn’t sure I could handle that.
I pictured myself floating. This time the image locked in even faster. I heard and felt nothing. For a few moments I wondered if I’d imagined her voice and plea. But I knew that was impossible. It had been too real. Netta’s need had been so overwhelmingly strong.
I closed my eyes tighter, trying to block out everything. I pushed out the stress and worry, and focused instead on the movement of the imaginary water in my head.
“Are you back to take me with you?” Netta’s voice filled my mind. “Please don’t leave again. You got my hopes up.”
“I don’t think I can take you back.” I didn’t want to give her anymore false hope than I’d already given.
“Why not?” Her voice was filled with a disappointment I could feel.
“Because you are dead.” I hoped I wasn’t telling her anything she didn’t already know.
“I know that.” Netta sighed.
“Then you should understand I can’t take you with me.”
“But you can bring me back. I know it. I can feel it.” Her voice held a whole lot more conviction than I felt.
“I can’t. I don’t even really understand how I’m talking to you, but I do want to help you.” Maybe getting justice for her was better than nothing.
“How can you help me if you won’t bring me back?”
“I can help let your family know what happened. I’m sure they’re worried.” I worded it carefully. No matter how long ago it was, she didn’t want to think about being forgotten.
“I’m sure they’re not. They think I ran off with Bobby. But like I said, I was tricked.” Her voice became even sadder.
I had about a million follow-up questions to ask, but I started with the one I wanted to know the most. “Who’s Bobby?”
“He came to town and swept me off my feet. Father said I shouldn’t marry a stranger, but I didn’t listen. Turns out my father was right. Bobby stole all my good jewelry I brought and killed me with a shovel. I bet he used that same shovel to bury me.” Anger seeped into her voice, making her sound older and more dangerous. Whoever the naive girl w
as that fell for the stranger, she was gone. And my blood froze.
If this Bobby was still alive I would personally make sure he wasn’t for long. A new kind of justice came to mind. “Where are you? Can you give me any idea?”
“Maybe ten miles outside town.”
“Outside of what town?”
“Millville, of course.” Netta spoke slowly as if she now worried I lacked basic intelligence. “What other town would I mean? There’s nothing around for a hundred miles.”
I wasn’t sure where we were, so maybe it was still true, but I was more and more convinced she’d been dead awhile. “Can you give me anything else to go off of? I don’t know the area well.”
“Not really. I guess pass the Lamper’s ranch and keep going west.”
“The Lampers?” I had no clue where I was so a family name wasn’t going to help things.
“You don’t know them?”
“I’m not from here. Remember?” I was sure Netta was wishing someone else had ‘found’ her.
“Oh. Well, go west from town.”
“None of this is helping.”
“You did say you couldn’t bring me back anyway.” She sighed.
“I’m sorry.”
“You know what?” She asked.
“What?”
“At first I was relieved he killed me. I was glad I wouldn’t have to face my father. Foolish thoughts I know.” She laughed dryly. “I was such a fool. Desperate to be loved.”
Who was I to judge what she did? “Not foolish. Normal. I’d think. It was a very difficult situation.” Difficult situation? More like traumatic and horrible. My choice of words was lacking, but to be fair the whole situation was messed up.
“Are you alone?” Netta changed the subject.
“No. Well, I’m alone talking to you, but I’m with other people.”
“Men?” Her voice lilted.
“Yes.” I admitted.
“Don’t trust them. They will hurt you. Men always hurt you.”
“Not always.”
“Maybe not at first, but eventually they do. They are snakes. All of them.” Her voice was low and dark. “Are you married?”
“Not married. Seeing someone. But I was kidnapped and...” I felt the need to explain even though I didn’t think it mattered.
“Kidnapped?” Netta’s angry voice turned to a panicked one. “Are you all right?”
“You’re dead, and you’re asking if I’m alright?” She was surprisingly thoughtful.
“I don’t want the same thing to happen to you. I wouldn’t want you to end up like me. Here. Although I do not really know where here is.”
I was starting to like this girl, and this wasn’t good because I was going to have to leave her behind. And what good would justice do for her in the end? She’d still be stuck exactly where she was.
“You’re powerful. Can’t you escape the kidnappers?”
“I don’t even know how to use my powers.” Everything I’d done so far had been akin to stumbling around in a dark room.
“You’re talking to me. That is using them.”
“True. That’s true. I’m learning from one of the men.” Eventually I’d be able to do this on my own, and that thought excited me more than I expected.
“Why do they want you? Because of what you can do?” Netta asked.
“Yes. They want me to do some work for them.”
“Work that will hurt others.” Her words cut right through me. “Right?”
“Yes. I know how bad it sounds, but they threat—”
“Your life?” She interrupted.
“The life of the man I am falling in love with.”
“Does that man love you?”
“I can’t say for sure, but I believe he does.” I didn’t get the whole ‘I want to mate with you’ thing exactly, but I assumed there was some love mixed in.
“Remember what I told you. You can’t trust men.”
“I need to be able to trust him.”
“Why? I thought I needed Bobby, and what good did that do me?”
“Because he’s all I have. And my feelings are too strong.” In my heart I knew it was true.
“He’s not all you have. You have your life.”
“Sorry. Yes. I shouldn’t have said that.” I was putting my foot in my mouth over and over.
“Even if you can’t bring me back, can you talk to me? I’ve been so lonely.”
“I don’t know. I’m not sure if I have to be near here, and since I’ve already told you I’m kidnapped maybe I should also add I was blindfolded when I was driven out here. I really have no idea where I am.”
“The city doesn’t matter. It’s more the place. I’m not really on earth—well, not the way I was,” she explained.
“I am going to try to help you.” I knew I was going to, so I laid it out there. “You deserve better than this.”
“Thank you. I like you. I hope you escape your kidnappers soon.”
“I hope so too.” And I hoped in the process I could help her. I’d never forget her haunting voice no matter how far away I went.
“You’re closer aren’t you?”
“I’m not sure. How can you tell?” Did she know something I didn’t?
“I can feel your presence.”
“Oh.” That was something to think about. “Now I need to somehow signal for the others to pull me back.”
“I’ll stop talking so you can.”
“Don’t go anywhere.”
“Where am I going to go?” The sadness was back in her voice.
I didn’t respond. There was nothing to be said.
14
Ian
“Finally. What the hell took so long?” Noah barked at me over the phone.
“I was indisposed. Find anything?” I waited a little ways off from the lake house, not quite ready to give up on the possibility that someone might show up.
“You can say that.”
“Meaning?” I had no patience.
“Meaning there are two Pterons waiting to talk to you at the ranch.”
“Is it him?” My blood boiled at the same time my heart rate accelerated at the thought of getting Mara back.
“No.” Noah replied immediately. “But they came all the way out here for a reason, and I’d suggest you get back here as soon as you can.”
“On my way.” I hung up the phone, stripped down, and reached for my bear. I wasn’t particularly excited to talk to more Pterons, but they may have been the first step toward finding the one who took Mara. I wasted no time running the distance back to the ranch.
Noah was waiting on my front porch with two people I’d never seen before.
I shifted out of view and hurriedly got dressed.
They didn’t have their wings out, but I knew they had to be the Pterons. I assumed they had to have shown Noah their wings. He’d sounded too confident about their identities to not know definitively.
As soon as I was dressed, I stormed up my front steps. “My mate will be returned to me.” I left no room for confusion. Whatever reason they thought it worth flying across the country to talk to me, finding Mara took priority above all else.
The female stepped toward me. She had dark brown hair she wore in a braid. She reminded me of someone, but I couldn’t quite place it. It had to do with her eyes. “We understand you are upset about your girlfriend, Mr. Grizzly.”
“Mr.?” I startled at her formal words.
“Would you prefer I call you Ian? You are the Alpha of your pack, and this is your land.”
“Ian will be fine.” Had Noah told her the truth about Jonovan? I hadn’t authorized him to tell anyone, but if he did it must have been because he believed he had no choice, or he thought it was in the best interest of the pack. Aside from his mistake with Claire, Noah had the best instincts of any of us. It was probably why he ended up a cop.
“Well then, Ian. My name is Casey, and this is my husband Toby.” She pointed to the dark haired man beside h
er. He watched me like a hawk—his eyes set on mine. “We are representatives of The Society and are here by the authority of the king.”
“What can we do for you?” I wasn’t playing niceties.
“I understand a Pteron was involved in the disappearance of your girlfriend?” Casey seemed to be picking her words carefully while watching me intently.
“Call her my mate.”
“Your brother implied she wasn’t officially your mate yet.” She turned to Noah.
I glared at Noah. “She will be.”
“Ok. We can call her that.” Casey smiled.
“And it wasn’t a disappearance. It was a kidnapping. The Pteron kidnapped her.” My hands balled into fists at my side. I would get him.
“Could you describe the Pteron please?” Casey moistened her lips. “Any details would help.”
“Dark hair. Black wings. Arrogant asshole.”
“That could describe several crow Pterons I know.” Toby grinned.
Casey glared at her husband before regaining her composure and turning her attention to me. “If I showed you a picture, could you confirm it’s the same Pteron?”
“Yes.” I would never forget that face. That arrogant smirk. Those black eyes.
She pulled out a phone from her back pocket and handed it to me.
I looked down at the smirk-faced man on her phone. “That’s him.”
“As I suspected.” Casey returned the phone to her pocket.
“Who is he?” I wanted a name. I needed a name.
“Bryant Florence.”
“Florence. I know that name.” Like the familiarity on Casey’s face I couldn’t place it. But I was surprised by how willingly she gave it up. Something more was going on.
“His brother is married to Vera. Leader of the Norco bears.”
“Vera. Wait. Are you related to her?” The familiarity fit.
“Yes. I’m her half-sister.” Casey smiled.
“Oh.” I thought about the connection. It wasn’t relevant aside from her closeness to bears. Maybe she’d be more sympathetic since I was a supporter of her sister.
“But we are not here to talk about Vera, or her husband. We are here because of Bryant.”
“How can we find him?” I didn’t want to waste a second more.
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