“I’m stuffed,” he said, his eyes never leaving me. “Are you still hungry?”
I shook my head no and placed my cup on the Formica table.
“Very well. Let’s go, then. Give me your plates.”
I put my plates on top of his so he could pay for them at the cashier stand, as was customary, but my dishes and his combined amounted to almost twenty. Even though they were made of plastic, they made for a very dangerous tower to carry around in the snug, busy place.
It was a game of Jenga waiting to happen.
He let out a low chuckle and an amused smile stretched across his face. He divided the plates into two towers to take them to the cashier, and I followed.
“Gotchisosamadeshita,” I said with a slight bow to let her know how much we’d enjoyed our meal. Amos echoed my words, and then we left after saying thank you.
He held the door for me, and I bowed. It was an easy habit to pick up when you were there.
The sky had gotten darker, but the small, busy streets of Shimokitazawa were bustling with life and lights. Pachinko parlors, restaurants, hip clothing stores…the little neighborhood had everything. I’d read an article that said the neighborhood was about to undergo major renovation before the Olympic games. The updates were supposed to split the neighborhood in two, and locals were wary about it.
It was going to change the landscape of this unique, lively environment.
“Thank you for dinner,” I told Amos.
“You’re very welcome,” he replied with a nod.
Tension grew in my stomach, thinking about what might happen next.
I had been fantasizing about the two of us being together for a long time, and now that I could finally act on it, I felt nervous.
“Amos?”
“Yes?”
“Why…why did you come into the bathroom earlier? Why did you feel the need to follow me in there?”
He stopped in his tracks, hands in his pockets, head hanging for a second before he brought his gaze to mine.
“You’re right, I’m sorry. That was a bit of a shitty move, wasn’t it? I just needed to talk to you. I needed to let you know everything. I’ve been holding on to the news of my split for so long, and you were the only one I wanted to tell.”
His tone was apologetic, but his expression wasn’t what I expected. He looked worried, eyebrows drawn together, as if he had something else he needed to say.
He continued, “I wanted to tell you many, many times.” He smiled uneasily, and I felt my heart swell in my chest. I didn’t like how much I was feeling around him.
I felt much too vulnerable.
He pressed his lips together in a tight smile and spoke again.
“I honestly didn’t tell you before because I didn’t want you to lose your focus while we were here.”
I rolled my eyes and scoffed at him. “Look, I like you, but if you think you could make me lose focus, you’re mistaken. Nothing could distract me from finishing this fucking comic, not when my life depends on it, not when it comes with a big giant ‘don’t fuck it up’ disclaimer.” I couldn’t live with myself if I got all lost in him and messed up such a momentous opportunity.
He smirked, and I didn’t understand why.
“What? Wipe that smirk off your face, please.”
“You said you like me.”
My mouth formed an O, suddenly realizing what words had passed my lips.
“You can wipe that frown off your face, Lena. I have good news. I’ll let you in on a secret: I like you, too,” he said, leaning in for a kiss.
I pushed him away.
“In the middle of the street? Are you insane? No one kisses in public in Japan.”
An amused smile stretched across his face.
“I’m dying to kiss you again, Lena,” he whispered, kissing the back of my hand.
Desire and anticipation took control of my body, and I felt like I was floating a whole foot above ground. Yet, instead of walking back to the train station, we kept walking around the little streets of Shimokitazawa until we came across one of the less trafficked ones off the main road.
He gave me a wicked smile and took one of my hands. He pulled me into a little tiny alley that was barely large enough for three people to walk through. We moved into a corner of the wall of an apartment building that was partially covered in ivy.
He gently pushed me backward until I was pressed against the building, surrounded by ivy leaves.
His eyes pinned me. He cradled my face with one hand, the other around my waist.
My heart soared when he lowered his lips to mine.
The kiss in the bathtub had been unexpected, passionate, and messy.
This one was slow and building, as if he wanted to stretch out the moment and live in it a bit longer. His lips covered mine over and over again, tasting, cherishing.
“God, you’re so beautiful,” he whispered before demanding access with his tongue. I surrendered to him. This kiss was the powerful one I remembered, the one I could never erase. It burned and danced, like the flames of a campfire.
The more oxygen we gave to it, the more the fire grew.
My heart raced inside my ribcage, beating rapidly.
Adrenaline coursed through my body, granting me the rush I always chased.
However, there was something sweeter, something more intimate about this kiss than the ones I’d shared with strangers, even than the one I’d shared with him before.
I ached for Amos in a way I never had for anyone else.
I could feel it in every part of my body, from my toes to my fingertips. The need to touch him, to kiss him, to worship him was almost unbearable.
I wrapped my arms around his neck and ran my fingers through his hair, leaning into him as he ground his hips against mine.
Mother of Diana Prince, I could feel all of him.
His hard chest pressed against mine, and I couldn’t stop fantasizing about being naked with him again.
Why hadn’t we done it before we left the house?
Oh, right—because I was an idiot.
We’d had months of verbal foreplay when it was all there could be between us, and now…now I felt like my skin was on fire.
I needed to have him.
We’d cracked the egg, opened the door, and now there was no going back.
For once, I didn’t want to look back. I didn’t want to stop.
I wanted to go forward.
Only forward.
LENA
It took us much longer than I expected to get home.
After he kissed me in the quiet little alley, we waltzed through the streets, walking side by side, our fingers barely touching, our starry eyes stealing glances at each other.
My senses were so heightened, a single brush of his fingers against my skin made me shiver. My eyes saw and my ears registered everything around us—the scents, the sounds, the daily conversations, the background noises, and even the sticky humidity of the tunnel in the train station, the smell of the brakes of the train.
My body and mind felt so awake, absorbing every little detail of the night.
He held my hand as we boarded, as if he didn’t want to let me out of his sight in the crowd, and when the train departed, his fingers covered mine as we both held on to the same pole in the crowded space.
My brain was recording new memories to add to the files of happy ones I had from this place.
I could barely look at him as he kept his gaze fixed on me.
His eyes were too intense, too wanting, too easy to get lost in. I couldn’t look at him without my heart speeding up in my chest, loud and deafening, undermining my self-control. I wanted to kiss him, wanted to touch him, but we couldn’t yet.
I met his eyes again as we came closer to our transfer station.
Fire danced in his gaze, and I didn’t need to ask him what he was thinking.
I continued to register all the small details around me…his hand on the small of my back as we got off the t
rain…his hand reaching for mine again as we descended the stairs…the wind blowing my hair as the JR line train approached.
I repeated the words of the Japanese announcement I’d heard a thousand times, the one that warned the train was about to arrive and you should stay behind the yellow line. Amos’ lips curled up in a smile as he noticed me mumbling the words.
We arrived in Shibuya then made our way through the sea of people hand in hand. The lights of the neon signs reflected on Amos, giving his whole figure a delightful glow.
His smiles were too addictive, too potent. I couldn’t not smile back when he looked at me like I was the center of the universe. I honestly couldn’t remember the last time I had been this happy.
Excitement and sheer joy succumbed to the fear that all of this, whatever it was, was going to be taken away from me.
I swallowed past the knot in my throat and held Amos’ hand tighter.
He must have sensed my slight mood shift because he gave me a long, pensive look. I smiled, trying to reassure him, trying to enjoy the walk, deciding to focus on what was about to happen.
We took a side street that would eventually take us to the quiet neighborhood in one of the busiest parts of the city.
The old house Maggie and I had lived in was only about fifteen minutes away from where we were staying, but I hadn’t had the courage to make it over there.
Maybe with time…maybe I could take myself over there, to see if the house was still there, or if it had become another apartment building.
Maybe in time I could even convince myself to go to the place where it all happened.
I found myself counting down the minutes until we could shed our clothes and be skin to skin as we approached the house.
We were walking down one of the quieter streets, one that didn’t have any shops, not even a convenience store.
The neighborhood was beautiful, and even though all I could see was the concrete walls of the villas, it still felt like a small oasis in the middle of a metropolis. I often found myself fantasizing about the kind of gardens and courtyards they hid. I wondered if the other homes were bigger than the one we were staying at.
Amos stopped in his tracks, as if suddenly realizing something. He placed his hand around my waist and walked me back toward the wall of a house.
I looked up at him, knowing exactly what was about to happen, but uncertain if it was a good idea or not. The staggering rhythm of my heart certainly thought so. It was beating so hard I felt it in my throat.
I could have kissed him a hundred times, and it still wouldn’t have been enough.
“I need to kiss you again,” he said in a low grumble, taking my face in his hands.
“I know,” I mumbled, covering his hands with mine, waiting, wanting, anticipating.
My body was tense, tightly arched around him like the limb of a bow.
I let out a shallow breath just before he leaned in. His lips gently brushed against mine, one time, and then a second time, soft and gentle.
I wanted a deeper, different kiss, but I didn’t dare interfere with his actions.
He kissed me reverently, covering my lips with his.
This kiss was different. It was possibly even more intimate.
A warm rush radiated from my chest to the rest of my body.
I wasn’t used to it, but fuck me, I liked it.
He was treating me as if I was something fragile and precious. I liked it rough and hard, but right then, I appreciated the gentleness of his lips.
It felt good to be cherished for once.
Then, when I least expected it, he switched gears. The tip of his tongue traced between my lips, parting them, capturing me in a slow, maddening, hungry kiss.
His kiss was discovery, need, possession.
I wrapped my tongue around his eagerly, despite my brain trying to tell me to take it slow. I had been waiting for this for way too long.
No amount of kisses was going to be enough.
I wanted every inch of him. He tasted and sucked and nibbled at my lips as his hands were busy exploring my body. My insides tightened, heat spreading in my lower belly.
I needed him to touch me there.
We’re taking this too far, the sane part of my brain reminded me.
We needed to stop, before someone saw us. This wasn’t Portland; people still cared about appearances on this side of the world.
Even kissing was frowned upon; making out was definitely out of the question.
Yet, I didn’t stop him.
His hands grabbed hold of my ass and he pulled me closer. I felt him hard against me, and the realization that his need was as strong as mine caused my insides to tighten up in anticipation. I could feel wetness dampen my underwear, and in that instant, I wanted nothing more than the feel of his skin against mine, the feel of him inside of me.
He broke the kiss, and we both stared at each other in amazement and awe as we caught our breath. He gave me a sultry, devious smile as he looked down the neckline of my shirt. One of his hands ran up my side and gave one of my breasts a gentle squeeze. He leaned down again and gave me a peck on the lips.
I patted his arm, breaking his focus. He searched my eyes, looking wary, as if I’d suddenly told him I didn’t want him.
Far from it, but I needed to pace myself. We needed to take this inside the house.
“We need to go before—”
“Someone sees us. Right. Let’s go.” He smiled and offered me his hand again.
When we reached the house, I let go of his hand, trying to put some distance between us, and headed for the door.
Before I could open the door with my keys, he reached for my elbow and spun me toward him. He kissed me again, slow and tender, but the urgency in his tongue and his breathing made me want to lean forward, wrap my legs around his waist, and tell him to take me to my room immediately.
I was torn in a battle between my head and my heart, unsure if I should be cautious or not.
My heart wanted me to dive in, kiss him, fuck him the way I’d wanted to for months, but my head kept telling me the enchantment was going to break, that I needed to be careful.
I pressed my hands against his chest and broke the kiss.
“I still think we need to talk.”
“About?” he asked with a stupid grin on his face.
“About what this means. About us.”
“Well, look at you. I didn’t think you were one to label things. I always saw you as a free spirit.”
I glared at him. “Shut up.”
He laughed and hugged me tighter, making me feel every inch of his hard torso and most of his erection.
I shivered in anticipation. I was dying to play with it.
I was dying for him to do all kinds of things to me.
“I’ll tell you everything you want to know,” he said in a low tone, his nose brushing against my cheek, placing a small kiss on the hollow under my ear.
“Need to stop,” I muttered, heady once more.
He let go of me and I opened the door. It was still early in the evening, but from the quiet and darkness in the house, it was evident that Rika had gone to bed early.
Even on the days when she was feeling good, she needed plenty of rest, and it was especially true now that she was under the stress of getting the manga finished.
AMOS
Pain.
I was in pain. I couldn’t wait any longer. My dick had been hard on and off since earlier in the day, and I was sporting a terrible case of blue balls.
But, in less than a minute, we’d either be in her room or mine.
I was going to strip her out of each item of clothing, and I was going to make her mine once and for all.
Or so I thought.
Instead, as soon as we got in, we found Hiroyuki lounging in the Western-style den by the entrance of the house, and as soon as he spotted us, he asked us to join him for a shot of sake. Rika was nowhere to be seen, and I suspected she was already lying down, as she oft
en did.
“Amosss,” Hiroyuki said in greeting, raising his glass and pronouncing the s more like su, like the syllable that ended so many words in the Japanese language. “Nomu? One drink, man!” he pleaded, raising the sake shot glass.
“Rena!” he called drunkenly. “Come on! One drink! Onegai!” Hiroyui pleaded.
“Sumimasen. Honto tsukaretadesu,” Lena told him with a slight bow, trying to get out of it by saying she was very tired. I pursed my lips to hide a smile.
Tired—not until I got to her.
I was about to tell him the same thing when he made a more pressing invitation, shoving a glass of sake in one of my hands. Hiroyuki said it would just be one drink, but I had sat down with him before, and it was never just one drink. It always ended up being an hour-long drinking session, at least.
“If you don’t want them to suspect anything about us, maybe I should humor him,” I told Lena in a low voice, knowing Hiroyuki was just drunk enough to miss the exchange. He did, as I’d expected, but I hadn’t expected to see disappointment in Lena’s eyes. She’d been the one suggesting being careful around Rika and Hiroyuki.
“Sure. You’re probably right,” she said in a somber tone. Then she gave my arm a subtle squeeze and said, “Hurry up, okay?”
I gave her a long look and a wink then muttered, “Later,” before sitting down with my Japanese friend.
LENA
As I expected, while I sat in my room and waited for Amos to come back, I was a ball of nerves. I kept thinking about his lips, his hands, and the dark look he’d given me right before I excused myself. I looked at my reflection in the mirror.
I had that wide-eyed, just kissed look, my lips slightly red, my cheeks flushed.
I kept replaying in my head what had happened.
His actions earlier that day…his teasing…what he’d said about wanting me.
His kisses—my God, his kisses. Just thinking about the way his tongue felt and tasted sent a chill down my spine. I needed to feel his hands and his tongue everywhere.
I had fantasized about it for so long.
It had been a fantasy. He was someone I could never have.
But now, he was about to be mine.
My mind kept racing, my body lit like a Ferris wheel at night, a kaleidoscope of colors and feelings and emotions bubbling up inside of me.
The Art of Us Page 19