She turned towards Lucky again, blinking her eyes and feeling panicky. “Lucky, I think my makeup is melting, I’m perspiring already.”
Lucky shook her head, assuring her that her makeup was perfect. Esha held onto Lucky’s hand. “I think you would have done this so much better than me. It’s really not …”
She was cut off from continuing by the voice over the microphone making an announcement and the applause from the audience as the models began walking down the ramp.
Esha looked at the girls walking one by one and even though she was the last one to walk on to the ramp, she felt her turn came very quickly. She looked at Lucky one last time and with her number being called, she climbed the steps up to the ramp. As she took her place at the top of the ramp, she felt a warm hand take one of hers. It held her hand tightly in its grip. It was Siddharth. This wasn’t part of the sequence they had rehearsed. Why was he holding her hand?
She felt the colour drain from her face and her knees began to shake. He was holding her too close, his body was brushing against hers, sending warm vibrations throughout her body. She could feel the hair at the back of her neck standing up.
She could not escape from his hold and kept walking until they reached the centre stage. He finally let her go and she stood absolutely still, not knowing what was coming next. Should she turn around and walk back up the ramp or should she just wait to see Siddharth take the next step?
What he did next, shocked her to the core. He bent down on one knee, took her hands in his and kissed them gently. He slowly looked up to her. “I love you,” he said. Esha wasn’t sure she heard him correctly. Did he say he loved her? The words were screaming in her head.
She felt as if she was dreaming. This couldn’t be happening in front of so many people. It wasn’t possible. Her head was swarming with so many thoughts – What would her mom say? What would she tell her? What must all the people there be thinking?
His words and gesture would have made any girl happy, but Esha couldn’t believe what had happened and wished that the ground would swallow her up.
The crowd began to cheer and clap. She realized that they must have heard what he’d said. ‘Oh no!’ she thought, ‘Now the whole world will know what he said.’ She panicked, tore her hands from his grip and ran towards the exit. She didn’t even hear Lucky calling her as she ran past her as fast as her trembling legs could carry her.
***
She opened the front door of the house with shaking hands and stood inside against the wall to stop her body from collapsing. Just then, Siddharth and Lucky burst through the front door.
Esha ran straight to her room and started throwing her things into a bag. Lucky came after her, grabbed her by the shoulders and turned her to face her. “What’s wrong with you? Why are you behaving like this?” she yelled at her.
Esha looked at her with bewilderment. “Didn’t you see what happened? You love him, why don’t you tell him that,” she said angrily.
Siddharth was standing in the doorway. “Lucky, is that true?” he asked looking confused.
Lucky turned her head towards Siddharth and said, “Yes, I love you, but as a good friend.” She turned back to Esha. “He is like a brother to me, nothing more.”
Esha stood there with her mouth open and stared in disbelief at Lucky.
Lucky put her arm around her. “Esha, what’s wrong with you? How could you imagine us to be in love? There is nothing like that between us. I always knew he loved you. Why do you think he was always coming here? It wasn’t for me, but to see you. I could see how much he loved you, but you refused to see it.”
Esha raised her voice in protest, “But... he has a girlfriend!”
Lucky looked at her in disbelief. “He has a girlfriend, you say?” She looked at Esha with raised eyebrows. “Maybe he had one before...but not now.”
“He has a girlfriend. It’s Rakhi,” replied Esha adamantly.
Lucky and Siddharth both started laughing. She quickly realized that maybe she was wrong to have thought that.
“Rakhi is my cousin,” said Siddharth. “She’s my mother’s favourite niece and very much a part of our family.”
She sat down on the couch feeling very embarrassed. Holding her bunch of clothes against her chest, she said, “But….”
Siddharth cut her off. He was disappointed and unhappy. “But what?” he asked. “You always have so many things running around in your head. Tell me what you are thinking.”
Lucky said, “Yes, tell us what are you thinking now?”
Esha looked at the two of them shouting at her. She shouted back, “How can I when nobody will let me speak?”
Siddharth stared at her and said, “Lucky, can you leave us alone for a few minutes. I have to sort this out. I want to hear what she has been thinking and take care of all her ‘buts’.”
Lucky left, closing the door behind her, while Esha looked like a child going to a school for the first time and watching her parents leaving her there.
There was silence. He sat down on the bed next to where she was standing. He pulled her by the hand and made her sit down beside him and gently asked, “Now tell me what you have been thinking.”
Esha didn’t know how to tell him. The grip of his hand was still tight, making sure she didn’t run away. She felt her body reacting warmly to his touch. She looked at him watching her intensely. She looked down at their hands.
Siddharth loosened his grip and asked her, “Did I do something wrong?”
“How could you do that in front of all those people? What will they think of me? You asked me to wear one of your designs and walk down the ramp. But you created a scene in front of so many people,” she said, once again feeling the enormity of his action.
Siddharth looked frustrated. “Damn it! I expressed my love for you in front of hundreds of people. If someone should have been really scared or nervous, it should have been me. I didn’t think you would react like that and run away. All I wanted to do was to show the world that I love you.”
He continued. “Please, if you are scared about this affecting your good girl image, then be rest assured that it has not been harmed. If anything has been hurt, it is my image because you ran away. But that doesn’t matter to me. I just wanted to tell you how much I love you. Nothing else.”
Esha could believe what he was saying. She bent her head down and said, “But love ……,”
Siddharth took her face in his palms, “But love? What about it? You don’t love me, is that it?”
She was so dumbstruck, she couldn’t speak. He brought his face close to hers, and placed his nose against hers. She felt his breath on her mouth. His closeness was evaporating all thoughts from her mind. It felt so good.
“Tell me you don’t love me and I will get out of your life. You will never see me ever again,” said Siddharth, looking with such anguish into her eyes while making his way deep into her soul.
She stumbled over the words. “I can’t trust anyone or love anyone,” she said with so much sadness, it almost broke his heart.
“I don’t need you to trust me or love me back,” he said earnestly. “But give yourself a chance and trust your heart and listen to what it says. Doesn’t it beat every time you see me? Doesn’t your body feel something when I am close to you?”
He pressed his cheek against hers and whispered, “Doesn’t your face take on a glow when your eyes meet mine?”
She felt the adrenaline rushing through her body. She wanted to hear more. She knew every word he said was true.
Keeping his cheek pressed against hers, he whispered again, “Tell me, does your heart say you can’t trust me?”
Esha closed her eyes, the power in his words struck right to her soul.
He was silent for a minute and then moved away from her. She wanted to feel him close to her again. She looked at him, her eyes shining with all the love she had for him. He came closer. She didn’t take her eyes away from his. She wanted her soul to absorb the way he made her
feel.
“Esha….” he said, and she could feel his suffering. He so desperately wanted her love.
She looked at him as he stroked her cheeks lightly with his fingers.
She was lost in the love in his eyes. All she wanted was to be near him, to hear him say he loved her.
“Esha, if you still feel you don’t love me. I can leave and…”
She shook her head slowly and placed a finger on his lips. The heat of his lips almost burned her finger, but she kept it there. “Don’t say that,” she begged. “I can’t bear the thought of never seeing you again,” she sobbed out.
Tears escaped his eyes and ran down his cheeks. She wiped his tears and placed her palms on his face.
“I can’t lie anymore,” she said with tears in her eyes. “Since the day I first saw you, I felt something inside me change. I could no longer control my emotions and feelings. You have made me so happy but also sad and angry at times, frustrated and even jealous. But when I am with you, I feel stronger and I can overcome anything. I have never felt so many emotions rush through me, but I was always scared of my mother. She wanted me to be a good girl. I thought by showing my love for you it would break her trust in me, but I can’t do it anymore. If I need to be bad, it’s ok, but I can’t hide it any longer. I have loved you always, from the day I first saw you. Since I have met you, despite all that has happened, you have always been in my heart.”
Siddharth enveloped her tightly in his arms, “My Esha,” he said lovingly. “Expressing your love doesn’t make you a bad girl. Keeping your love inside you and letting it burn up within is bad. There is nothing good or bad outside, it is just what you feel inside. If you feel happy inside, that means you are good. You don’t need to show anyone you are good, just feel it inside.”
She could feel his heart beating strongly against her with every word he said.
They remained holding each other. Being in his arms was like magic. They made her feel better, safe and loved. “Esha?” he asked.
Esha moved her head away from his chest and looked up at him. “Yes?” she asked.
Siddharth took her hands in his and cleared his throat. He looked at her with such emotion in his eyes and with so much joy. “Will you marry me?” he asked, looking at her expectantly.
Esha’s smile got bigger and bigger, her eyes were shining with love. She couldn’t look away from his gaze. She let out a deep sigh.
He said her name again. She hid her face in her palms and quietly said the word he had been waiting to hear, “Yes.”
He pulled her hands away from her face and lifted her chin, so he could see right into her eyes.
“Say it again,” he said with a smile on his face. “Yes, I will marry you!” she said in a strong clear voice.
Siddharth shouted with joy and swung her around in his arms. Lucky came running into the room. She looked at both of them and asked, “What’s happening?”
Siddharth waved her out and said, “Nothing, just give us two more minutes.”
Lucky smiled and left the room, closing the door behind her.
Esha’s happiness started to fade when her mother came to her mind. “Mom will never agree,” she said disheartened.
Siddharth smiled, taking her hands in his. “Who says?”
Esha looked at him in surprise when he took out his phone. He held out the phone so she could see who he was calling. He was making a video call to her mother.
Esha shook her head, “No, please don’t call her.”
But the call had already connected and her mother appeared on the screen. Siddharth held the phone in front of her. “Hi, Esha!” said her mother with a big smile on her face.
Esha smiled back at her and then didn’t know what to say. She was feeling so overwhelmed, happy and nervous at the same time. Siddharth could see that she was almost in shock. He turned the phone towards himself and said to Esha’s mother, “Aunty, can I marry Esha and make her mine?”
Esha could feel herself blushing. She feared what her mother’s response would be to Siddharth’s question.
“I couldn’t be happier. I hope you both keep smiling like this always. I don’t think there could be anyone better than you for my Esha,” her mother said sounding extremely happy for them.
Siddharth smiled at her mother and then looked at Esha who couldn’t believe what she had heard her mother say.
Siddharth muted the phone speakers and asked Esha, “Do you want to ask my parents too?”
Esha eyes widened and she said, “What? Are you crazy?”
Siddharth unmuted the speaker and asked, “Aunty, where are my mom and dad?”
Her mother turned the phone towards Siddharth’s parents who were sitting on a sofa near her.
He smiled and asked his parents, “Mom, Dad! Do you agree to this marriage?”
His mother smiled and said, “Of course, we do. Why else would we be here together? We all agree to this marriage. And I want Esha to be my daughter-in-law as soon as possible.”
Siddharth blew a kiss to his mother and disconnected the call. He looked at Esha.
She asked, “How did you manage this?”
Siddharth smiled and replied, “I told you, my mom was looking for a girl for me. When I mentioned your name, she screamed with joy and said she would talk to your mother. They spoke on the phone and your mother agreed to the marriage instantly. I arranged for my parents to visit your mother to make all the other arrangements.”
Esha narrowed her eyes and looked at him closely. “And my mom agreed to all of this?”
Siddharth stroked her hair and said, “She loves you, but she also trusts me.”
She looked at him for further explanation. “Actually, your mother and I have been in touch before this. I used to call her and sometimes she used to call me after she went back home from Mumbai. So, I guess she knew all along how I felt about you. Does that explain everything?”
Her eyes sparkled and she still felt ecstatic from the love he had shown her.
Siddharth knelt down in front of her. His chest touching her knees, he held her hands and asked, “Once more, please.”
Esha blushed. “Once more of what?” she asked knowingly.
Siddharth raised his eyebrows and watched her closely. “You better say it again before I start kissing you right now. Now that we have our parent’s approval, I’m allowed to do that.”
Esha wanted to hide her face again in her palms before saying those words to him. She suddenly felt shy but he held onto them as if he was never going to let go. He looked at her impatiently. “Esha, please.”
Looking shyly at him and with a trembling voice she said, “I love ….”
Before she could finish, his lips were on hers. His kiss was as soft as the touch of a butterfly. She could feel her heart beating rapidly in her chest.
A strange sense of wonderment ran through her body. She lifted her hands and held his head lightly. She felt his hands drawing her into his arms.
She moved into his arms wanting to feel him close. It felt as if the whole universe had embraced them and they didn’t need to worry about anything. Neither good nor bad could touch them anymore. Bliss had poured over them as they held each other.
They were still holding and kissing each other when Lucky called out to them. “Can I come in now?” she asked.
He moved away, breaking the spell and he whispered in her ear, “Now that you are mine, we can do this again and again. Those lips are mine.” Esha blushed and giggled at his words.
“Lucky, please come inside,” called out Siddharth releasing Esha and sitting down.
As Esha heard Lucky’s footstep approaching, she moved a little away from him, but he held her hand in his and made her sit down with him, “I’m not letting you go again,” he said in a serious voice.
Lucky came in and stood smiling at them. “I’ve been waiting so long for this day. Wow, I’m so happy for both of you.”
Lucky ran to Esha and kissed her. Esha couldn’t stop smiling at
her.
Lucky turned towards Siddharth and said, “Please don’t say that you are going to live together right away.”
“Lucky!” Esha said indignantly.
Siddharth blushed with joy and said, “That would be great. I don’t want to be apart from her now, but we will only stay together once we are married. Or if Esha feels fine about it, then we could….”
Esha looked at him horrified. “No, no. I could never do that,” she said proudly.
Lucky and Siddharth started laughing, while Esha hugged Lucky again.
Epilogue
Esha opened her bags and started unpacking the clothes that she had brought for the honeymoon trip. Each item made her smile and brought back glorious memories of their special time together. She missed him already.
Moving to the door and latching it, she went to take a quick shower. She was alone in the house and Siddharth had already left for work. He had promised to get back home as early as he could that evening.
She took a long, warm shower. Her body glistened from the steamy spray of water. She dried herself and changed to a baby-pink coloured suit and sat down to put on her sindoor.
The red colour of the sindoor looked wonderful against her skin and her face was radiant.
She looked at herself in the mirror and the memories of her wedding day began flashing before her eyes.
Since early that morning, people had begun pouring into the venue and her mother had been running around like a machine. Even so, at times she would come and stand close to Esha and give instructions to the ladies saying, “Do it well. Everything must be perfect. It is my darling’s wedding.” Kissing her cheeks gently she would say, “My Esha…” and then before Esha could hug her back or say anything, her mother would dash off to do something else.
The makeup artist did the final touch up and said, “Done. Look at yourself now.” The makeup artist then turned towards the other females in the room, and said, “Have a look and tell me how you like it.”
They all gathered around Esha, the young ones giggling while the older ones said, “Simple and beautiful.” One of the ladies made her way to stand next to Esha, stared at her for quite some time and said, “But all will be gone tonight…the makeup, the clothes, everything. After all, it is her first night as a bride and wife.”
Rhythm Of Love Page 8