Patience was watching her. “Constance, we can do something for you, but will you do something for us in return? We’d like you to be part of our plans.”
Constance considered lying. Just long enough to get Harper away. But she couldn’t do it – lies would trip her up. “I’m not much of a joiner. Besides, I’m babyfused: my baby comes first.”
She felt Patience tapping for admission as she tried to mindmap. She resisted. Patience’s mouth turned down, and she tried to convert it into a smile.
“I’m running ahead of myself. Of course your baby has to be your priority. We can talk about this again. Now, we’ve considered your suggestion about helping this man to escape. But we can do better than that. How would you like to have him live with you here in Sisterland?”
Constance stopped walking. “Is that possible?”
Patience halted too. She stepped close to Constance, so close she could see where her skin was attached.
“The Nine wants us silenced. But why not silence the Nine? Why not replace it? Constance, we can have a Silent Revolution! And afterwards, we’ll set up new structures.” Her tone became confidential. “Some of us have been disappointed with the way our society has developed. It’s too controlling. Too closed against new ideas. We’d like to see Sisterland progress along different lines.”
“No more separating men and women?” A nod. “Would we be allowed to live together? In families?”
“I’m afraid that won’t be possible for every sister. Not at first. But for some, yes. For exceptional sisters, like you.”
“There’s nothing exceptional about me.”
“You stand for something. Silence isn’t with us. But you are – you’re a link to her. You can be our figurehead. And in return, you’ll find us willing to reward sisters loyal to our vision. We could arrange for you to share a twoser with this man you appear to have bonded with.”
Constance was dumbstruck. The Silenced were offering her the chance to make a home with Harper. It was beyond anything she had dreamed was possible here in Sisterland. Delight surged. But even as it did, the terms being set snagged on her joy.
“A figurehead? I wouldn’t know how.”
“It’ll be a walk in the park.” Patience had an unconvincing laugh. It tinkled now. “Just be yourself.”
“You wouldn’t expect any more from me?”
“Some speeches, as well. You have talent. Your oratory will swing sisters all over Sisterland to our cause.”
“I’m not interested in causes.”
“You’re interested in a different way of life, though. The benefits will be tangible. You’ll have incentives, Constance. Sweeteners.”
Temptation nibbled, and she struggled against it. “We’re all meant to be equal in Sisterland. Privileges are wrong.”
“They exist already. Some of the perks are hidden in plain sight, and some are hushed up. Let’s see. The Shaper Mother has a private chef. The Peer Mother has a travel permit. Some of the mating mothers have the right to Himtime without a babyfusion licence. Mothers in all disciplines who reach certain targets are entitled to larger living spaces, and join a waiting list for threesers.”
“I never even knew they existed!”
“You’d be surprised what’s available to the top tier. This society needs to be reformed, Constance, and to do that we need talented sisters like you.”
“But you’re offering me perks! That flies in the face of reform.”
“It’s not ideal. But let’s focus on the positives. In time, we’ll extend as many privileges as possible to every sister. For now, we intend to start by offering them to those we consider friends.”
Again, Constance felt Patience’s willpower circle her mindmap, hunting for admission. She fended it off. “And when I have my child? Does she live with me, too?”
A ripple whisked across Patience’s face, and she dropped Constance’s arm. “We don’t seek to sweep aside everything in Sisterland. That’s wasteful. Girlplace works well. We’ll maintain it. Your daughter stays with you for the first year, then she goes to girlplace. You can see her often there. Maybe we could bend the rules about no source visits during the first month.”
“I want to keep my child. I don’t want her sent away.”
“But who’d look after her when you’re carrying out your duties?”
“Harper.”
“Is he the man you want us to help?”
Constance nodded. Patience beat her fingers against her mouth, considering the proposal. On tenterhooks, Constance watched her. What a gift, if she was allowed to keep both her baby and Harper beside her.
However, Patience shook her head. “You overestimate a man’s capabilities. Your bond with him blinds you to his limitations. After the Nine is replaced, we can set up an education programme for men. In time, some will manage to accept certain responsibilities. But childcare is the highest calling – not even an outstanding man would be fit for it. We mustn’t expect too much, or rush the pace. It’s unfair to make them take on more than they’re capable of.”
“Harper knows how to love. That’s all he’ll need to care for our child. You’re offering me a deal, Patience. Those are my conditions.”
“This is a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to be an agent for change. Yet you’re half-hearted about it. Though you show a great deal of interest in how the Silent Revolution can improve your life.”
“I have to look out for myself.”
Eyes glittering, Patience scanned Constance. Without further speech, they reached the flower gardens. Patience stopped by a Harmony Parks worker combing the grass to make it grow in the same direction. “Where are the sunflowers, sister?”
“Gone. They’ve been vandalised. Someone hacked them down overnight. Such a sorry sight this morning. All those golden heads lying in the dirt.”
“Why would they do that?” asked Constance.
“Your guess is as good as mine,” said the gardener.
They moved on.
“It must have been your supporters,” said Constance. “Attacking beauty isn’t the way to challenge Sisterland.”
“Some of them can be a little misguided.”
“Perhaps it’s because even flowers are controlled – their scent, their flowering seasons.”
“Let’s inspect the damage.”
There was no sign of wreckage, however. Already, it had been cleared up, and anemones grew where the sunflowers had blossomed.
“Sisterland remains beautiful,” said Constance.
Patience did not acknowledge the sarcasm. They continued on their circuit, and arrived at Beloved’s statue.
“I saw the red scarf on Beloved yesterday,” said Constance. “It was a declaration of war, wasn’t it?”
“War? That’s overstating the case. What’s warlike, after all, about a red bow? But it made the case that Beloved doesn’t belong to the Nine. She belongs to all of us.”
They steered towards the Virtue Boulevard gates, Patience cloistered inside her thoughts, while Constance hoped against hope that Patience would give her what she wanted. She supposed asking for both Harper and her child was excessive – it looked as if the gamble hadn’t paid off. Constance longed to be indoors, and able to remove her skin. A rash was itching beneath it – either babyfusion didn’t agree with her skin, or her skin didn’t agree with it. Who was she to make conditions? This Silent Revolution was her best chance of survival. She considered telling Patience she’d changed her mind, that her child would go to girlplace like every other Sisterlander. But loath to look weak, she held off.
“Goodbye, sister,” said Constance.
“Wait. You strike a hard bargain. But you have your deal.”
Constance’s spirits leapt. Here was the best of all possible worlds! “Thank you, Patience. I’m grateful. You’ve no idea how much this means to me.”
“We’ll expect a lot from you in return.”
“I’ll do my best for the Silent Revolution. Is there anything you want me to do
now?”
“Not yet. You’ll be told when the time comes. Wait here for five minutes. We shouldn’t arrive at Shaperhaus together.”
Constance watched the retreat of the straight spine and precise steps.
Unexpectedly, Patience doubled back.
“I presume you’ll be at the Memoryday ceremony in three days’ time? For Honour’s sake?”
Constance nodded.
“Make sure your seat is near the steps to the stage. They have more space round them. It’ll be full to capacity, and a babyfused sister shouldn’t risk being caught in the crush.”
So even Patience had a soft spot for babies! “I’d need a priority pass for one of those places.”
“So ask the Shaper Mother. Do it for your baby. Public events can be unpredictable beasts.”
Chapter 31
That night, Constance went to Harper’s eat-easy. Graffiti that was now a familiar sight was printed on the wall outside.
We will not be SILENCED
Beside it, a removal spray in her hand, was Serenity. She pouted, as red as the paint.
“That slogan’s springing up all over town, sister. I’ve tried scrubbing it with every cleaning product on the market, but it’s impossible to budge. They even painted it on a wall in the Sistercentral grounds. Hard to believe, with all those scrutineers. But my other saw it with her own eyes. Back looking for calcium soup?”
“I didn’t order it in advance.”
“As it happens, I did. I knew you’d be back. Anyone who tastes our rice squares always comes back for more.”
They went inside, where Constance hovered by the counter, trying to make conversation so that Harper would hear her, until Serenity said, “I’d take the weight off my feet, in your condition. Swollen ankles are no joke. I know all about them in my line of business.”
Constance sat with a view of the kitchen hatch. She thought she could detect the back of Harper’s head, but it was impossible to tell with a hood. How hot it must be for men in kitchens. Yet they weren’t permitted to unhood. No allowances were made for working environments.
After eating, she lingered, until Serenity hinted about closing time. Outside, Constance waited at the back of the office building where she and Harper had spoken a few days previously. It was an uncomfortable wait, her tolerance levels compromised by babyfusion. Her feet were throbbing, her armpits itched and her hairline was slick with perspiration. By the time Harper arrived, she ached all over.
“I heard you talking in the easy.”
“I hoped you would.”
“You look different.”
“Because I’m babyfused? I seem to be ballooning.”
“No, because of the skin.”
“You don’t like me in it? I was wearing it the last time we met, but you didn’t mention it.”
“It makes you remote.”
“I’m still me under it, Harper. You look different, too, in that hood. But I try to see past it.”
“A skin masks a woman’s face. It’s a copy of what lies beneath, but it hides something essential.”
“Fair point. But I wear it to guard against environmental damage and not to cover my face.”
“Though it does.”
“Though it does,” she conceded. “Look, let’s not waste time. Those women I mentioned. The ones who don’t like the way Sisterland is run. They belong to a group called the Silenced. They’re planning a Silent Revolution – for a different kind of Sisterland.”
His eyes became twin torches. “They’ll help me to escape?”
“Something better than that. At least, I think it’s better. You’ll be able to stay in Sisterland, and live with me and our baby. If you want to, I mean. You can look after the baby while I work – they want me to play some kind of figurehead role. It’s because of Silence, my other. Those details don’t matter, though. What matters, Harper, is there’s a movement to replace the Nine. And it wants change. Conditions will improve. For men. For everyone.”
“The Nine won’t go quietly.”
“True. But there’s a chance it will happen. We have to hope.”
“What else will they change? Will they do away with hoods and skins? With matingplace and Hutchtown? Will they pay men for their work?”
“Maybe. I only know what I’ve been promised: that we can be together. That’s how it used to be, in PS days. You didn’t know, did you? Women have hidden that from men. We used to live together, and raise our children. Would you like that?”
“We’d live together in my forest?”
Her pleasure in the deal offered by Patience was checked. She hadn’t factored in how attached he was to his forest. “We have to live in Harmony, Harper – your forest’s a long way from here. You see, the new regime will expect speeches from me. I’ll have to appear at rallies, and so on. That’s the price we’re obliged to pay. I know you love your forest – I know living away from it would be a sacrifice. But surely who we’re with matters more than where we are. This allows us to be together. With our child. Wouldn’t that be enough for you, Harper?”
At first, he said nothing. Then he pushed back his hood, and his eyes fastened on hers. “I’ve forgotten what a tree looks like.” His voice was desolate.
“I don’t understand.”
“The Hutchtown Mother. To keep me under control, she’s had things taken away from me.”
“What things?”
“My mind picture of trees. I know the names, and I know they matter to me, but I can’t call up the images any more. Constance, I’m a forester, and I don’t know what a tree looks like. They say, ‘It’s dangerous to remember too much’ but they’re lying. It’s dangerous to remember too little.”
“You’ll remember them again one day. The memory will break through. It won’t stay smothered.”
“The man I work with in the easy says there are trees in Harmony. But if I’ve seen them, I don’t recognise them for what they are. I don’t connect with them.”
“We have some trees in the city, along boulevards and avenues. They’re small – we use them for decoration. And there are beautiful trees in the grounds of Sistercentral – not that you can go in there, I’m afraid. When you see a forest again, you’ll remember trees.”
“I hope so.”
“Concentrate on afterwards. When we’re allowed to be together. I live near the riverbank, it has a few trees. Not many. But it’s peaceful there. You can see frogs, and fish, and all sorts of insects. Well, maybe not all sorts – many are extinct. But some still survive. We could build a good life, Harper. If everything goes according to plan.”
He took her hand between both of his. Turning it over, he kissed it on the inner wrist against the pulse point. “If, Constance, if. You’re not free here, any more than I am. And how free will you be with this new group of women? Using you as a figurehead because of something your other did – that’s another control. Another untruth. I don’t like the sound of it.”
“I know it’s not ideal. They say I’ll be part of an elite. That sets warning bells ringing for me, too. But what alternative do we have? Trying to escape is riskier. I can’t go yet, I’m babyfused. Even if we wait till after the baby, Outsideland is a total unknown. At least Sisterland is knowable. And we can be together.”
“We could be together in Outsideland.”
“They’re not offering to help you escape. This is the deal. I become some kind of figurehead, they let me be with you. And we raise our baby together. Think of it, Harper! That’s an amazing prospect! You can teach our child about the forest, and the creatures living there. Perhaps the three of us might be able to visit there one day. How about it? Isn’t it worth a try, at least?”
“I guess so.” In a rush, he said, “Don’t get in any deeper than you have to, Constance. Not for me, not for anybody. This is dangerous.”
Constance filled her chest with oxygen. “I didn’t want to tell you, but things are unsafe for me anyway. I don’t fancy my chances after I become a source. The
Shaper Mother’s protecting me, but she won’t be able to keep me out of harm’s way for much longer. Not now, when I won’t spy on the Silenced for them.” She laid her hands on either side of his face. “The truth is, I don’t have anything to lose by accepting this deal. But I have you to gain, Harper.”
He tilted her chin, drawing her face closer, mouth fastening on mouth. And possibilities glimmered.
When they drew apart, he said, “All we do is talk about me. How are you feeling? How’s our baby?”
“It wants me to eat all the time, and then it gives me heartburn.”
He laughed, low in his throat, and the love she felt for him caught at her. She pressed herself close to him, feeling his body heat against her through the coarse material of his clothing. She longed to believe the Silenced would succeed against the Nine, and she could be with Harper. But she didn’t know if she truly could believe it. It had to be an act of faith. For now, she’d have to make herself believe. It would keep her putting one foot in front of the other.
As they prepared to separate, he asked when they could be together again.
“Not till after Memoryday. Will you have the day off? Most of the easies are closing.”
“I’ll be in Hutchtown. Out of sight, out of mind. That’s how your sisters like men.”
“Not me. I’ll be thinking about you. Always. I suppose the Silenced might try to make an impact at one or other of the events. It’ll be too good an opportunity to pass up.”
“Keep your head down, Constance. You don’t owe them anything.”
“But I do, Harper. I owe them for you – for what they’re promising to do for you.”
With an abruptness she wasn’t expecting, he stepped back, pulling up his hood. She knew, without being told, that he resented his dependence on her to free him.
“If this revolution of theirs fails, there’ll be discontinuations, Constance. Stay on the sidelines for as long as you can.” He backed away, into the darkness.
“Wait! Harper! You’re frightening me! I’m not one of the leaders.”
About Sisterland Page 27