by Evergreen
"Aggie told me what you do for a living."
"She had no right to!"
"Don't be angry with her. She told me months ago. A person has to talk to somebody, you know."
"Well, am I doing anything so terrible?" he burst out.
"She's not used to things like that."
"And I am used to them?"
"Of course not. Except that you seem able to stand it. You feel you have to. But she's made differently and she can't face it. That's why she takes a drink, don't you see?"
"She doesn't help herself that way. She doesn't help us."
"I'm sure she knows that, and it makes her feel worse."
"Do you always understand so much about people?"
She looked up quickly. "Are you being sarcastic?"
"Iris! For God's sake! I meant you understand so much, and you're only seventeen."
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"That's funny. Most of the time I think I don't understand very much at all."
He put his head in his hands. "I wish I could find a decent job but there isn't anything. I've tried, believe me I have."
"I believe you."
"Tell me, do they know at home what I do?"
"They found out. Not through me! Through Cousin Ruth. You know she has relatives who keep up with Wolf Harris. It seems all some people do is talk about other people."
"Did they have anything to say about it? The truth."
"Ma didn't. She waited for Pa the way she always does. And he said it was a disgrace, a scandal."
"Then can he get me anything better?"
"You never asked him to."
"Would you, if you were in my place?"
"Don't make me take sides."
"Why doesn't he call me? Answer that!"
"He's older, Maury. He is the father, after all," Iris said quietly.
Agatha was still asleep when Iris left. He ran the water for Eric's bath and wondered how she was with the child while he was away. She could be so delightful! She loved to sing, and often he had heard her singing while taking her own bath or working in the kitchen. He hoped she wasn't silent all day. Since Eric had been born he'd been reading the child-care articles in the newspaper and learned that babies can sense moods and read expressions. He hoped the boy was getting a good start.
Eric was sleepy after the bath and Maury lifted him up and held him. The child was a comfort to him; wasn't that odd? This tiny sleepy thing to comfort him? His mind darted, darted. He laid Eric down and went to their closed bedroom door. Seven o'clock. She ought to have something to eat. His hand was still on the knob, half unwilling to turn it. He had an odd flash of recall: long before they were married they'd had a conversation, about being behind a closed door together, and he thought how strange it was that once they would have almost died as a price for one hour alone together, behind a closed door.
She was just waking up. "What time is it?" She sat up, startled, frightened, apologetic. He sat down on the edge of the bed and took her hand.
"Aggie, I am, I really am going to try to find some other job," he said.
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They gave him a new stop. Timmy's place, they said: be there around eleven for the pick-up. It was a summer day, one of those days when the sky is lofty blue as porcelain, and anywhere else but here the air would smell of grass.
He drove out New Lots Avenue and turned left. The landscape was familiar: the ragged, unkempt edge of the city, with a few rows of attached houses among empty lots and some one-storied buildings with small stores. Taxpayers, they were called, which meant that they just about paid for themselves and no more; you kept them until times were better, then tore them down and built something that would show a real profit. Until times were better.
He stopped in front of Timmy's. It was a candy store on a neglected street. You couldn't do much business here unless there was a school somewhere in the neighborhood, he thought idly. Then it would be busy after three o'clock and on warm nights when the kids would congregate. He went inside. A couple of fellows, a short one and a tall one, were at the magazine stand. They didn't look like cops but he glanced at them to be sure, raising his eyebrows at Timmy for a signal.
"Come in," Timmy said and they went in back, so the men must be all right, not cops. Timmy had expected him, of course.
"I'm Maury, expect you'll be seeing more of me," he said by way of affability and took what Timmy handed him and put it in his pockets. On the way out, just to be sure, but also out of friendliness, he bought a pack of Luckies, then went outside and started down the block to where he had prudently parked his car.
A car had drawn up behind his. If it's cops, he thought, I'll just keep walking steadily. He heard running steps behind him and, turning, saw the two men from the candy store. He stepped aside but they slammed into him where he stood and knocked him to the ground. Somebody in the car opened the door and he was dragged in yelling and kicking. There was nobody on the street, which was empty as a cemetery. Not cops, he thought, but who—? And then he was on his back on the floor and the men were holding him down. The car roared away.
"What are you doing to me? For Christ's sake, lemme go, what do you want, I'll give it to you—"
"He'll give it to you, Shorty, you hear that?" the big one said.
The car filled with laughter and he couldn't tell whether there
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were one or two in the front seat. Shorty brought his fist down on Maury's nose. The pain was dazzling.
"Who are you?" he cried. "What do you want? Just tell me. Please. I'll do what you want, only don't—" The tall one had slid half off the seat, digging his knee under Maury's ribs.
"You tell us," the big one said. His knee ground deeper. "You tell us what you were doing in Timmy's place. We know what you were doing, we just wanna hear you tell it."
"If you know, then you know I was picking up for Scorzio . . . Jesus Christ!" Maury screamed. Shorty brought his fist down and when Maury twisted away in time to save his eye, it caught the cheekbone and the side of his bleeding nose. "Ask Scorzio. Call him. He'll tell you-"
"You're a friend of Scorzio's? Ain't that nice?" "Call him, ask him!"
Someone in the front seat called back, "Christ, is this fruit for real? Where the hell do they pick up a fruit like this?"
"Bull, you tell him," Shorty said, mincing his words. "This is my friend Bull, this gentleman. His real name's Bullshit but we call him Bull. He'll tell you all about it."
Bull's knee dug deeper. I'm fainting, Maury thought, fainting or dying.
"Look dearie," Bull said, "you got yourself into a helluva lot of trouble just now and Scorzio can't help you out of it. You and Scorzio just happened to cross over the line into our territory. Now, Scorzio may think it's his, but he's thinking all wrong because it ain't his, it's ours, and you goddamn son of a bitch better keep the hell out of it." He caught Maury's ears, and pounded his head against the floor of the car.
"I didn't know—" Maury was crying, weeping, screaming. "So help me God, I didn't know, so help me, I wouldn't have—"
"Shut the friggin' bastard up," someone said. "Toss him the hell out, we're through with him."
The car lurched and swung and slowed. They were opening the door; it fell wide; they were shoving him, lifting him, kicking him; he heard his own screeching terror, and grabbed crazily, blindly at the door beyond his reach, then at the running board, then at the air.
It was dark and there was a distant humming as of bees or traffic on a highway. He struggled to discern it, raised his head and
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felt a pain so sharp that he thought a knife had been thrust into his ear. He screamed and suddenly everything flashed light; he was in a room; there was a fluorescent bulb on the ceiling and someone was standing over him; there were low voices. Then one by one things floated into reality. These were nurses and he was on a bed. It had been their voices, humming and buzzing.
"Mr. Friedman," one said, "you're feeling better."
The other
voice inquired: "Do you know where you are?"
He frowned, not comprehending, and then came a white rush of clarity and he understood that they were trying to see whether his mind had been affected. He would have laughed, only his mouth hurt, and he said, mumbling, "Ospil? Ospil?"
"Yes, you're in St. Mary's Hospital. You've been here two days. You fell out of a car. You remember that?"
"Yesh." Remember. Panic, crimson blinding before the eyes. They're killing me. Wet his trousers. Pinned down. Pinned. Screaming, witch voices. Witch screams. Theirs? His? And the opening door, rush of speed, air. Remember.
He shook, gasping.
"There," the nurse said. "There. You'll sleep. Don't talk. I know you understand me. I just want to tell you before you sleep that you're going to be all right. You've had a bad concussion and a cut on the forehead that will heal nicely. Your collarbone is broken, and two fingers. You're lucky to've come out like that. Your wife's been here with your neighbors. We sent her home, and she's all right, too. So don't worry about anything."
Flat calm voice of authority. A mother's voice. He went to sleep.
Later on, a man's voice. Smooth, cool, also authority. "I'm Detective Collier. The doctor says I can have five minutes with you. Can you tell me what happened?"
Alert now, thinking clearly. The fuzz of drugs mostly gone, so the pain is sharp. Face all sore, wonder what it looks like? Careful how you answer.
"They pushed me out of the car." Feign sluggishness. He won't know the fuzziness is gone.
"We know that. Who were they?"
"Two men. Grabbed. Pulled me in. Then pushed me out."
"Yes." Very patient. "Do you know the men, ever see them before?"
"Never."
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"Think, now. Is there anything you remember about them, the way they looked or a foreign accent, or anything? Did you hear them call each other by any names? Think carefully."
Anything I remember? Never forget. Ugly gnarled fellow, left eye wandering toward the shoulder, tall muscular guy like a Western movie, green tie, tie staring at me, he leaning over, pounding my face. Bull, name of Bull. Short for Bullshit, Shorty said, laughing.
"Take your time. I know it's hard for you." Oh, I'd like to see them hang, I'd stand there laughing. But they know who I am, Agatha alone in the house. He shuddered. "Can't think. Sorry, I want to, but—"
"Did you happen to hear the name Bull? Have you heard that before?"
"Bull? Bull? Nope, nope."
The voice, not as patient now. "I hope you're not trying to conceal anything, Mr. Friedman. It's hard to believe you don't remember anything, not one word, that was said from the time you got into that car. What were you doing when they pulled you into the car?"
"I was on trie sidewalk."
"Yes, yes, of course. What were you doing in the neighborhood, what was your business there?"
"Bought a newspaper in the candy store." "Yes. Well, what do you do for a living? You weren't working that time of the morning?"
"I don't have a steady job. Laid off." "Unemployed?" "Yes, unemployed."
"We were at your house to see your wife. You live quite well. Drive a nice car."
What would Agatha have said? He felt strings winding, netting him, and wasn't able to think strongly.
Then another voice, "Sorry, Officer, it's more than five minutes. This man's been badly hurt and you can see he's not fit to answer any more questions."
"I could get at the heart of this in less than a minute, Doc, if only he'd cooperate."
"Cooperate? Officer, take a look at him! He doesn't even understand what's going on! You'll have to go, I'm sorry." Firm. Firm.
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"You can try again tomorrow. There ought to be improvement by then, I hope."
"Look, I'll go easy. Just another minute."
"No, now. You'll have to go now."
Much later, the doctor's voice, tough Brooklyn snarl. "I don't like cops."
"That why you helped me this morning? You knew I understood everything."
"Yeah. I knew. Lie back, I'm supposed to look under this bandage."
Light fingers, almost fluttering. "Am I hurting you? I'll try not to. We don't want any infection under here. Spoil your handsome mug."
Small thrill of pain, tingles down to the belly.
"Sorry, had to be done."
"It's all right." Wincing, looked into narrowed eyes, black brows like caterpillars, intern, about my age, no, has to be three years older. "Why'd you help me this morning?"
"I'm always for the underdog . . . and today you were it. In my experience cops are always against the underdog."
He's all mixed up. Sometimes the cops are the underdog. He's mixed up, but no matter, this isn't the place for philosophy or sociology. "Tell me the truth, Doctor, am I going to be all right?"
"It'll take a couple of weeks. Take it easy, let the collarbone heal and get over the shock."
"Just a couple of weeks, you're sure? I've a family to support, I've gotta get working." All panicky again thinking about it. Feeling the responsibility. Like lifting a ton.
"How many children?"
"One boy. God, I couldn't afford any more, not now."
The doctor stood back from the bed, far enough for Maury to see the whole of him. The stethoscope hung from the pocket of his long white coat. Interns were proud, liked to display that first stethoscope. You could see the pride in him. Also fatigue. Also intelligence, very, very much intelligence.
"And your wife? How is she?"
"She's all right. The nurse said she was coming back today."
"A very lovely girl. And frail."
"Is there something wrong? What did you see?"
"Don't be alarmed, I shouldn't have said that. I only meant I
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could see she's delicate, can't stand up under too much. So I know what you mean by responsibility. Am I right?"
Maury sighed. "You're very perceptive, Doctor."
"That's what they tell me."
His head throbbed with every step. He had been home for three days and the doctor had said he ought to walk a little. He went to the end of the block. There was a grassy space between the houses and he sat down on a stone. His forehead had begun to itch under the bandage, and that meant it was healing. A big gash, they had said, but it will heal fast because you're young. Thank goodness, he'd saved his eyes from those vicious animals. Animals? Animals didn't do things like that to each other. It was a warm day, but he still felt cold. He had even worn a thin sweater. Nervous shock. It would take time to get over it. He was surprised Agatha was doing as well as she was. She had been so scared about him that she hadn't even asked what he was going to do.
When Bruchman had come to the house she had gone into the bedroom with Eric, but she had overheard their conversation. Bruchman had begun by explaining that somebody—he didn't say who—had made an awful mistake, hadn't clarified the new districts, and so Maury had mistakenly been sent into an area that wasn't theirs. But that had been corrected now. Also, the detective who had questioned Maury in the hospital had been taken care of and nobody would be asking him any more questions. By the way, Maury had handled that very nicely. As a matter of fact, as soon as he got on his feet, they would be wanting him in the office, and no more running around the way he had been doing. "No, thanks," Maury had said.
If it was a matter of money, surely he knew that money was never a problem. He could earn double what he'd been getting. Hadn't they paid for his private room in the hospital and come right out here to make sure his wife had money while he was gone? No, it wasn't a matter of money, and indeed Maury appreciated everything, but quite simply he wanted to be through. No hard feelings, he just wanted to be through. He lied to make it easier. He might even be moving away from New York.
Bruchman had tried some more, had even been quite insistent, but then finally, seeing that it was no use, had gone out after shaking hands and wishing Maury good luck.
Agatha
had opened the bedroom door and come out crying.
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The tears were running down her face, but her face was shining and she had clung to him. "Oh, if anything had happened to you, I don't know what I would have done, how I would have borne it!"
"I'll take care of you," Maury had said, "I swear I will." And she had replied, "I know you will, Maury, I know."
But how he would, he had no idea. How? Where? He got up and walked slowly back to the house, remembering the want ads and the patient lines at five in the morning, a hundred men for every job, the lines and lines from the Bronx to Brooklyn and Queens and back again.