by Tanya Stowe
Just a little smile, and sunshine filled Sunny. It spilled out of her into the interior of the dark car, making her whole world brighter. Just like that. Absolute joy, so strong it frightened her. She caught her breath, released Jackson’s hand, turned, and started the car.
~*~
Jackson resisted the impulse to reach over and shut the car down. He wanted to twist Sunny back around and kiss her, but he stopped himself. They’d shared a special, unique moment, and like a scared bunny, Sunny ran into a hole and pretended it didn’t happen. Gritting his teeth, he fastened his seatbelt. As the car pulled into the sunshine, he marked the fact that they’d just spent over an hour in a dark parking lot doing nothing but talking. Pretty amazing.
Sunny was amazing. Behind all that bright hair, glowing skin, and bubbling personality lay incredible strength. He sensed it, felt some steel even through the flood of tears after her open sharing of a past no child should ever have to endure.
Her past drove Sunny, pushed her relentlessly. Because of it, she was determined and strong and possessed impenetrable walls. Those walls had come up and surrounded her, severing the connection he’d felt with her from the moment they’d met. He wasn’t sure why she felt the need to shut him out, but he’d find out, one way or another. What happened between them, that understanding and connection…it was real. The light that surrounded them when they were together was worth fighting for.
Jackson’s groceries were ready. A young man delivered them to the curb and accepted Jackson’s payment on a handheld credit card processor. Then they were off.
Traffic was light so they made good time down Sunset Boulevard and up the coast. This time they had the garage door opener so Sunny pulled straight in.
Jackson clicked it closed behind them, effectively shutting out the sound of the busy highway. He opened the back of Sunny’s SUV and pulled out his suitcases. “I don’t think I could stand the noise if not for these conveniences.“
“Let’s hope the sound of the waves doesn’t disturb you.”
“Oh, I sleep like a baby when I sleep. It’s the everyday noise of speeding traffic that would get to me.”
She lifted a bag of groceries.
“I can get these, Sunny. You should go on. I feel guilty eating up so much of your time today.”
“I told you, it’s been wonderful.”
Yeah, all except for that moment of truth when we should have said more but you turned away.
Sarcasm wouldn’t help her lower her defenses either. He needed to shift his attitude. Hefting the cases in his hand he grabbed the door key out of his pocket. “In that case, can I talk you into having a steak with me? I think I saw a grill on the deck. I can barbecue like no other, and I make a fruit drink you’ll love.” He opened the door.
She stepped through into the compact kitchen.
He was sure she’d say no…until she caught a glimpse of wide, blue ocean waters beyond his front room windows. Then a soft, sweet smile drifted over her lips.
“Thanks. I’d love to have dinner on your deck. It’ll bring back more good memories.” She set the bag on the kitchen counter. “But only if I can help.”
“No problem. You can find a place for all these groceries while I carry this other stuff upstairs.”
“Don’t you want to give me an idea of where you want things?” she called out as he took the stairs two at a time.
“I think you’ll probably do a better job of organizing than I would.”
Her laughter floated up the stairs as he hurried into the bedroom and dropped his cases. He practically ran back down, determined to get dinner on before she changed her mind. After he set his guitar and stand in the front room near the fireplace, he threw off his jacket and headed to the deck. The brisk, brine-scented air hit him in the face. He was glad he’d rushed dinner. Sunset was coming quick and bringing a chill with it. He didn’t want to give Sunny any excuse to leave early. “The grill is full of gas and ready to go. Now I just need a pitcher and a cutting board.”
Sunny pointed to a cabinet above his head. “I saw a pitcher in there, and here’s the cutting board.” She pulled one from the cabinet.
For the next few minutes, they worked side by side, Jackson preparing his fruit drink as Sunny finished putting away the groceries. It felt right for them to be working together…in fact, everything about Sunny Bates felt right to Jackson.
“OK, that’s done.” She folded the last of the bags and tucked them beneath the sink.
“Here, try this.” He plopped a pineapple cube and a cherry into a tall glass of pink fruit juices and handed it to her.
She sipped. “Wow. You were right. I do love it.”
“Good. Sit down and enjoy while I whip up this salad.”
She meandered into the living room. “Hey, it looks as if they delivered the files and demo CDs of the contestants you’ll be working with.”
“Great. Why don’t you put one on while I grill these babies?” He held up a plate with the seasoned steaks. Soon the sound of a soft soprano drifted to him on the deck.
Sunny came outside and headed to the edge of the balcony to gaze at the waves. Obviously, she’d enjoyed her years in the beach house. Why had she never returned after her father sold the family home? Perhaps he’d learn the answer another day, but now wasn’t the time to ask. This moment, this time, was for quiet and peace, a peace that seemed to fill him every time he was with Sunny.
When the steaks were done, they sat at the small table for two. Jackson asked her to say the blessing. He wanted to know what she was thinking, what she was thankful for, and wasn’t disappointed when she mentioned this time near the ocean. Even though she didn’t say it, Jackson knew her prayer included him.
They ate in silence, with the singing voices of his contestants providing an interesting backdrop. His mind wasn’t completely on them. He’d listen again later, but for now, he was pleased with the quality of voices he’d be working with.
Sunny pushed her plate away. “I have to say, that was one of the best steaks I’ve had in a long time.”
“Thanks. I do take pride in my barbecue skills. But we won’t talk about the stove or the oven.”
She laughed and looked toward the waves.
The sun was low on the horizon, tipping the water with gold. Another sunset with Sunny. Now Jackson was feeling blessed. A chilly breeze whistled by.
She shivered.
“Here, let me get my jacket.” He retrieved it from the back of the sofa. When he returned, Sunny was leaning against the waist-high railing of the deck. He wrapped the jacket over her arms and lifted her hair from beneath. The silken threads wafted the scent of sweet oranges toward him.
She looked over her shoulder and murmured her thanks.
The expression on her face was almost wistful. Was she as sad as he that their day together was ending? Did he dare hope it was true? He stepped beside her and leaned his elbows on the railing to watch the fireball sink a little further into the dark blue waves.
“You said your assistant won’t be arriving until Tuesday.” Her tone sounded almost as wistful as her expression had seemed.
“Yeah, Buzz needed a break. I told him to spend some time at the ranch and ordered him not to come until Tuesday.”
“Buzz? I don’t remember dealing with someone with that name.”
Jackson chuckled. “Connor Maise, my cousin.”
“Ahhh, of course. That, I recognize.”
“We call him Buzz. When he was a kid he was full of energy. Always buzzing around, being annoying. My aunt guided him in the direction of public relations, thinking he had the perfect energy level for the work. She was right. He’s great.”
“So he’ll take care of rounding up transportation for you?”
He nodded. “I’ll be in the studio most days after we wrap up filming for the show. It’ll be a tight schedule, but it’ll keep me focused.”
They stood in silence before Sunny glanced his way. “Why the ranch?”
&nb
sp; “Pardon?”
“Why did you tell Buzz to spend some time at the ranch?”
Jackson shrugged. “It’s the most relaxing place I know. My parents sort of have an open-door policy. All of the family heads there when they need time. They can always use an extra hand and well…working with the horses kind of quiets you down, puts you in touch with the Lord. Also, spring is the best time at the ranch: blue skies, gentle rains, and the smell of cut grass first thing in the morning.” He closed his eyes, remembering the sweet scent, and when he opened them, he found her watching him.
“You love it there.”
“I do.”
“I can see why coming here was such a challenge for you.”
Jackson leaned closer. He let his gaze sweep over her face to land on her lips. “It has its benefits. I wouldn’t have missed spending these few days with you, Sunny.”
Those full, pink lips parted, opened slightly in surprise.
Jackson didn’t hesitate. Looping his arm around her waist, he pulled her close, grasped her chin with his other hand and kissed her. At first, she was unyielding and stiff. But then one tentative hand touched his chest. He swept his hand beneath her hair, tilted her head slightly, and fitted her mouth to his. Like everything else about her, it felt right. So right.
She tasted sweet, like her fruity drink. Her lips were full and soft and opened to him with a little sound. She smelled like a fresh California orchard mixed with a tangy ocean breeze. Both her arms went around his waist, and he pulled her against him. The feel of her slender body in his arms was like a shot of adrenaline. He wanted to run his hands down the sweet curves, to grasp her hips and pull her closer. He wanted to pick her up and carry her inside.
Too fast. Everything was happening too fast. Groaning, he grasped her arms and gently moved her back to lean his forehead against hers.
Sunny took another step back, putting more distance between them. She frowned, as if she was confused. Touching her lips, she gave a slight shake of her head then grasped a lock of hair and began to tug on it. “That kiss was…was…”
“Explosive.” Jackson finished for her.
She shook her head. “No. It was dangerous. I have very strict boundaries, Jackson. No drugs or drinking. No unhealthy relationships, and especially, no sex. That path led to my dad’s destruction. I intend to stay on the straight and narrow.”
Jackson smiled. Reaching across the space, he grasped her fingertips. “So do I.”
She stopped winding that lock of hair around her finger but didn’t release it. “Are you kidding? Every picture I’ve seen, you have another starlet on your arm.”
Sagging, he leaned against the railing. “Yes, on my arm. That’s all. To tell you the truth, Sunny, this whole super stardom thing has hit me pretty hard. Sure, I wanted to make my music, and I hoped for a certain amount of popularity like my dad and his band. But this…women ripping my shirt off, and stalking my every move…that’s something I didn’t see coming.”
Her lips quirked a little, as if she was trying to suppress a smile. “It’s kind of hard to feel sorry for you, standing here on this beautiful deck, on some of the most expensive property in Malibu.”
Shaking his head, he grinned. “Agreed. There are lots of perks. I don’t need your sympathy, but I sure could use your friendship. People throw themselves at me, Sunny. Men and women anxious for recognition, for a helping hand…everybody wants something and none of it is real. They don’t care about me or what I want.”
Her green eyes softened. “What do you want, Jackson?”
He gestured to the sinking sun. “This. Someone to watch the sun sink into the ocean with me. A friend I can talk to like we did this afternoon. A person who understands how hard it is to remember what’s real and important when you’re in a business where everyone treats you like a precious commodity. I want to stay grounded. I want to never forget that my cousin Kelly’s daily problems with her toddlers are just as important as mine.”
Her head tilted to the side as a real smile teased her lips. “Those are really nice things to share with someone.”
“I think so, and it’s even better when that someone looks like you.”
She ducked her head and laughed. “You’re not so bad to look at yourself.”
“See? We like each other. We want to go in the same direction. Can’t we walk that path together?”
Sunny sagged and released the lock of hair she’d been tugging so hard it had to hurt. After a few moments of thoughtful quiet, she nodded. “OK. But let’s take it slower, Jackson—much slower.”
“I agree. Just one question left. Do you promise to give it a real chance?”
She nodded, too slowly for Jackson’s liking. “I promise.”
“Good.” Before she could stop him, he pulled her in and kissed her until they were both breathless. Forgetting that kiss would take a long time…maybe forever. And that’s what Jackson had aimed for. He had the feeling that in spite of her promise, Sunny would try really hard to put him out of her mind.
7
Sunny adjusted her headset, pushing the mic away so she could speak to her assistant. “Amanda, can you check on Brittany’s makeup? It sounds as if she’s about to have a meltdown.”
Amanda nodded and took off, her petite, black-clad body weaving in and out of workers and equipment like a slinky animal after prey.
The youngest of the contestants on the program, Brittany needed the most coaching and consoling. The young girl had been a pain to work with, and Brody hadn’t helped. As her mentor, he’d talked her up, made her over-confident, and now she needed constant reassurance. Sunny couldn’t help feeling that if Jackson had been the girl’s go-to celebrity, she’d be on a better track.
Jackson. The mere thought of him made her smile. They’d been working together now for weeks. Rumors of a work place romance were the last thing either of them wanted, so they’d kept their encounters low key: an occasional lunch with other coworkers, and a few quiet meetings behind closed doors. Between Jackson’s studio sessions and Sunny’s work gearing up for the first taping of the show, there’d been little time for them to see each other outside of work, but that first weekend shimmered in her mind like a scene in a perfect glass snowball.
The smell of bacon triggered visions of Jackson teasing Dorothy. His smile from across the room brought back the sensation of his lips on hers. And that kiss…! Weeks later, the memory still made her tingle.
Everything about that weekend had a golden glow. Time hadn’t dimmed her wonder. Something wonderful was just around the corner. She could feel it. Sense it. That unrelenting excitement thrilled her and frightened her at the same time. But she was content to let it stay “just around the corner.”
For some reason, she hadn’t told Jackson about her father’s infidelities. Toward the end of her parents’ marriage, her father had slept with one woman after another, and each new fling broke her mother’s heart a little more.
Most of her mother’s tearful outbursts came after witnessing her father’s blatant affairs. Sunny was so young she probably shouldn’t have understood what was going on, but she did. Every heart wrenching moment when her father appeared with a new woman was etched on her memory like a cut across her skin.
Her pastor had helped her recognize her father’s lack of esteem. The minister’s explanation made sense. Long before the affairs began, Sunny’s dad deemed himself unworthy of his wife’s love and subconsciously sought to prove his own lack of merit. Sunny remembered him saying, many times, that he was no good for her mother.
Still, his infidelity was painful to Sunny. Each and every affair meant a rejection of her and her mother, of the love they’d shared as a family…of those treasured moments when he’d kiss her mother’s hand on his shoulder and turned to look for Sunny.
As much as she appreciated Jackson reminding her of good times, those memories also proved to her that love was fickle. Even the most loving and sincere relationships could fall apart. She’d seen her
parents’ marriage, and countless other Hollywood relationships fail. Falling in love was a rocky road full of pitfalls and heartbreak, and she wasn’t sure she wanted to walk down that path.
Besides, she had a mission, a God-given purpose. She’d worked hard to become a bankable asset. If this year’s show was as successful as she felt it would be, she’d be poised to ask for backers for her company. A romantic relationship would get in the way of her goal. She couldn’t focus on creating a production company and someone like Jackson, who seemed to consume her mind, her common sense…her very breath. She couldn’t afford to let anything or anyone derail her when she was so close.
But Jackson made her feel happy. Plain and simple. Sunny couldn’t remember many times in her life when she’d been happy. There’d been periods of relative peace and contentment with her place in life. Pleased for her mother. Satisfied with her work. But happiness was a new and heady emotion. Maybe that’s why she always worked so hard at making others happy, because she’d never really known that elusive state of mind herself.
Still, Jackson could walk into a room and her world brightened. A spark of happiness lit inside her. If he laughed, she laughed. If he nodded in understanding, she felt it deep down inside.
Even though she’d promised to give their relationship a fair trial, her heart of hearts told her it could only work as long as they kept things light and easy. They could have more beautiful, uncomplicated weekends, maybe some adventures, but no more of those wonderful, dangerous, explosive kisses.
Amanda returned and placed a hand over her mic. “Disaster averted. Good thing that girl goes on first. I don’t think she’d make it if she had to wait.”
Sunny sighed. “We need to come up with a plan of action. Brittany will have to stand on her own two feet. Make it or break it.”
Amanda nodded.
Over the headset, they heard the director’s call to action. The studio MC had been prepping the audience—talking, asking questions, warming them up. Now the show was about to begin with the intro of the new panel of judges.