by Sable Sylvan
“Diane!” called Natalie, but it was too late. Her friend was already leaving. She turned the other way. The koalas were watching her expectantly. Shizz. Natalie was going to need that liquid courage. She took a large sip of the drink, which surprisingly, did taste like iced tea, and made her way over to the bar stool between the two men.
“Thought you’d never show up,” said Bruce jokingly. “Am I gonna need to go jackaroo on your sweet butt and catch you again? Because trust me, I don’t think Zach could keep me back this time.”
“No, sorry,” said Natalie. “I mean, about last time. I have some shizz I’m sorting through.”
“What kinda shizz?” asked Zach.
“You know how I told you I need to get the key to my heart back?” said Natalie.
“Yeah,” said Bruce.
“Well…I meant that…literally,” said Natalie, taking a long sip from the drink. It was strong, but it was helping her loosen up a bit.
“Literally? How?” asked Zach.
“I used to date this guy, Randall,” said Natalie. “Things were serious. Real serious.”
“How serious?” asked Zach.
“Engagement serious,” said Natalie. “We were engaged. Heck, I was even looking at wedding themes. But…he called it off. Said he couldn’t handle me and my curves.”
“How could he not handle them?” asked Zach. “They’re so plump and luscious, much better than a bag of sticks and bones.”
“Randall and I were both large,” explained Natalie. “But Randall, he didn’t believe that I truly liked him the way he was. So, he went to the gym a bunch, and…there was a girl at the gym. They exchanged numbers. He said she was just a friend, but…I walked in on them having sex, on our bed. I was shocked. I packed up all my stuff and left…except, I forgot one thing, the key to my heart.”
“But what is the key to your heart?” asked Bruce.
“My grandmother, Christine, bless her soul, left me a large heart-shaped box when she passed. The box has been in my family for generations. The box can only be opened with a key. I accidentally left the key in my jewelry box and left the jewelry box at Randall’s,” explained Natalie. “He gave me back the jewelry box…but when I checked, the key was missing. He said he didn’t take it, that he had no idea where it could be, but, where else could it be? He had to have stolen it. Of course, I have no proof he took it, so I can’t go to the cops.”
“You’re sure this bastard has your key?” asked Zach.
“Surer than I have been of anything before,” said Natalie. “I know I can go get a locksmith or jeweler to make a replica key or open the box, but…it won’t be the same without that key. The key and the box are a set. They need to be together. I want to one day pass that box on to my granddaughter, and when I do, I need it to be complete.”
“What’s in the box?” asked Bruce.
“That’s the thing, I have no clue,” said Natalie. “I wasn’t ready to open the box while dating Randall. My grandma passed last year, and I still haven’t gotten over that loss. Maybe I never will. But, when I am ready to open the box, I want to have the right key to open it. I want to do this right. I owe my grandmother’s soul that much.”
“We can get that key back for you,” said Bruce.
“You can? How?” asked Natalie.
“Trust me, we’re Australian,” said Zach. “We get into all kinds of mischief, nonsense, and general rabble-rousery. Getting a key back from your ex, that won’t be any trouble at all.”
“We might just have to break and enter,” said Bruce.
“Breaking and entering? That’s illegal, what if you get caught?” asked Natalie.
“We won’t. Trust us,” said Zach. “We might be koala shifters, but I’m sure we’d make great cat burglars.”
“By this time next Saturday, I guarantee that you’ll have your key back,” said Bruce. “We’ll need a week to come up with a plan, get together the necessary supplies, but…we’ll get you back your key. That’s a promise.”
“I have no idea how to thank you two,” said Natalie. “You don’t have to do this.”
“First of all, we do have to do this, you’re a special gal, and this scumbag shouldn’t treat you this way,” said Zach.
“And secondly…if that’s all we have to do to earn a date with you, you can consider it done,” said Bruce. “Trust us. We’re the men that deserve your curves…and giving you back the key to your heart, well, that’s something we’d do for you ten times over to earn just ten minutes of your time.”
“You’ve got sass, curves, and now?” said Zach. “You’ve got us.”
“I can drink to that,” said Natalie, and she lifted her glass and toasted with the boys. Call it Fate, call it Diane’s meddling, but Natalie was ready to take back what was hers so that she could finally open up her heart.
Chapter Five
That Saturday, Bruce and Zach knocked on Natalie’s door. She had been up early, unable to sleep well. When she opened the door, she couldn’t believe what she saw.
“That’s what you two are wearing for the heist?” Natalie asked, looking over Bruce and Zach. The pair was in striped tank tops, Bruce’s green and blue, Zach’s oxblood and navy. They were both wearing khaki shorts with cargo pockets and had on flip-flops and aviator sunglasses, mirrored, in colors that matched their shifts. Bruce was caring a large pastry box while Zach was holding a box of tea.
“What did you expect, darling?” asked Bruce.
“You want us to get some tactical gear, maybe some all-black latex catsuits?” asked Zach.
“Well…that is what I was expecting,” admitted Natalie. “How the heck are you gonna sneak into Randall’s house wearing that?”
“Don’t worry your pretty little face about that,” said Zach.
“Okay, okay, but you do have a plan, right?” asked Natalie.
“Of course we do,” said Bruce. “Here’s what’s gonna go down. We’re going to go over to Randall’s house today while he’s out of the house. Zach and I, we’ll shift into our koala forms, and get into his house through the air ducts. We’ll get your key, get out, and put the cover back on the air duct. He’ll never realize we were there.”
“How the heck do you know he’s gonna be outta the house today?” asked Natalie.
“Simple,” said Bruce. “Bear Buns has connections to tons of strip clubs in the area. Most strip clubs feature female dancers.”
“Right, I don’t follow,” said Natalie.
“We asked two friends of ours to ask Randall out,” said Zach. “We found Randall’s dating profile, and the gals made a joint profile. We knew that Randall wouldn’t be able to resist a date with two strippers. We were right. He’s got a date with them from noon to four, which gives us ample time to get in and get out.”
“Aren’t you worried about, oh, I dunno, leaving fingerprints?” asked Natalie.
“Nope,” said Zach. “After all, what’s he gonna report? A robbery of property he stole from someone else? He’d have to be a moron to report that. But…Randall was dumb enough to give up your ample curves and sass, so, that is a slight risk.”
“So what’re the pastries and tea for?” asked Natalie.
“For you, of course,” said Zach, walking in with Bruce and closing the door to Natalie’s house. “Nice place you’ve got here.”
“You don’t have to lie, I know it’s teeny,” said Natalie.
“You do? Well, then, sorry babe, but, this is a bodgy apartment,” said Bruce, putting the pastry box down on her kitchen counter.
Zach started her electric kettle, filling it with water and putting it on the electric strand while he found three mugs. He put a bag of tea in each and looked for milk and sugar while Bruce got out plates.
“What kind of tea did you bring?” asked Natalie.
“Australian Breakfast, our special blend,” said Zach. “It’s like an Irish breakfast tea, in that it’s hearty and malty, with a bit of an orange flavor. However, it’s also got cre
am and caramel flavored black tea. It’s best hot, with milk and sugar, like any other breakfast tea.”
“Sweet hot tea and pastries? Aren’t you a little worried about, oh, me gaining some weight?” asked Natalie.
Bruce walked up to Natalie. Natalie looked up at Bruce. He was so much taller than her. He was even broader than her, his muscular shoulders helping his torso form a V. Was he always this much taller than her, or was her apartment so small that it just made him look bigger?
Bruce gently grabbed Natalie by the upper arms. Her flesh was soft under his firm grip. Just touching her was like squeezing a ripe fruit, but instead of juices, he could’ve sworn Natalie’s scent nectar was made of her distilled feminine hormones. It was a scent that signaled to him her dual arousal and surprise hit his nose. As messed up as it was, it was like a perfume to him.
Natalie looked at Bruce’s hands on her arms, and her eyes traced a path from his firm grip up his veiny forearms to his strong, bulging upper arms. Any other man treating her this way, well, they’d receive a slap in the face and a swift kick to the nads, but Bruce…well, he and Zach were her exceptions.
Bruce released one of Natalie’s arms and using his finger to lift her chin up and turn her face so that her eyes had to meet his. His gaze was intense, piercing.
“Trust me, Natalie, if we wanted a skinny mini, we’d go after one, but…Zach and I? What we want is curves, lots of’m. You think you can help us out in that department, miss?” asked Bruce.
The contrast between Bruce grabbing her like she was just a toy and him calling her ‘miss’ turned Natalie on. She felt her honeypot moisten and from the look on Bruce’s face, the barely perceptible whiffing of his nose and his pupils dilating, she knew that he too could tell that her petals were glistening.
“I…I think I can handle that,” said Natalie.
“So no talk of losing weight,” said Bruce. “Some Aussies might want shrimps on their barbies. But Zach and I, we want more than just a chook for a cook. We want a meaty beaut.”
Before Bruce could lean in to kiss Natalie, a beep went off
“What was that?” asked Bruce.
“Just the billy,” said Zach.
“Billy?” asked Natalie.
“The teapot,” explained Zach. “You didn’t think that you Americans were the only ones with slang, did you?” Zach poured the hot water into the cups before adding a lump of sugar to each cup and a splash of milk, extra for Natalie.
Bruce opened the pastry box. Inside, there was a selection of large gorgeous pastries. These weren’t petit fours or mini eclairs. These were all breakfast pastries. There were glistening danishes with berry red centers. There were apple turnovers, their fillings peeking out from their sugar crystal encrusted edges. Cinnamon rolls, their swirls filled with spicy goodness, their tops bathed in frosting, called out to Natalie, begging to be unrolled. Of course, there were also glossy almond-coated golden delights, bear claws, the most popular pastry in the PNW.
“So, what’ll it be?” asked Bruce.
“The bear claws look delish, but, the cinnamon rolls are irresistible,” said Natalie. “I can’t choose.”
Bruce pulled a knife out of his pocket. It was large, in a sheath. Natalie was surprised she hadn’t noticed it earlier. He pulled the knife out of the leather holster and used it to cut a bear claw, flipping the knife as he cut so that he ended up with half the bear claw on his knife. He then put the half bear claw onto a plate. Bruce used the knife to cut a cinnamon roll the same way, except he had to stab through all its layers to keep it together for Natalie. He used a fork to get the cinnamon roll off the knife and then passed the plate of pastries to Natalie with the fork.
“Never let it be said that you can’t put on a show,” said Natalie as she started to dig into the pastries.
The bear claws were perfect, with a flaky top and a moist interior filled with almond and coconut paste. The almond slices on the top of the pastry added some extra crunch to the pastry. The cinnamon rolls were divine, still hot from the oven (where the heck had the guys gone to get hot pastries at this hour?) and covered with a vanilla bean frosting that melted in her mouth. Natalie sipped at the Australian breakfast tea. It tasted like an orange and cream cupcake, and she ended up having a second mug of tea before they left…to get her heart back.
The trio drove to Randall’s house in Bruce and Zach’s shared SUV. Natalie was nervous that Randall’s car would still be in his driveway, but when they got there, the car was gone.
“Stay in the car,” ordered Bruce. He gave her his phone and Zach followed suite.
“If anyone calls us, it’s probably the stripper gals,” said Zach. “If they call and tell you something’s gone wrong, honk the horn, and we’ll come out ASAP.”
“Got it,” said Natalie. “We’ve gotta hurry. It’s already one.”
Bruce and Zach gave Natalie quick kisses on the cheek before they ran across the street to Randall’s house. Natalie had on sunglasses and a hat as her disguise, but that couldn’t hide the fact that she was nervous as heck about this heist.
Bruce and Zach went to the back of Randall’s house and found the air vent. While Bruce undid the screws on the air vent, Zach got changed out of his clothes. Bruce handed Zach the screws, and Zach put them in his pants pocket. Then, Bruce disrobed while Zach shifted into his koala form. Once Bruce was in koala form, his clothes and Zach’s covering the air vent panel behind the house, he and Zach climbed a pipe into a leaf-filled gutter. Bruce was carrying the screwdriver in his mouth.
Bruce and Zach were careful not to get their feet wet. They swung down from the gutter, into the open air vent. Now it was just a case of finding Randall’s room.
Bruce and Zach were light enough not to break the air vent. The first room they peeked into was the bathroom, over a cabinet. Perfect. They carefully used the screwdriver to pop open the air vent panel, which had a simple hinge and no screws, and went into the bathroom, hopping down from the cabinet to the bathroom floor.
Bruce and Zach carefully crawled through the house, peeking into rooms until they found the bedroom. It was a mess. Luckily, it wasn’t too large.
Bruce checked over the desk while Zach looked in the closet.
Nada.
Bruce checked under the bed while Zach looked through Randall’s trash.
Nothing.
This was going to be harder than they’d thought.
Natalie had been reading a book on her phone when she heard a phone ring. She looked. It was Zach’s phone. There was a call from ‘Stacy.’ Natalie answered.
“Hello?” said Natalie.
“Zach?” asked Stacy.
“No, this is Natalie,” said Natalie.
“Ah, the woman of the hour,” said Stacy. “Hon, I don’t have time to make small-talk, but…Randall left the date early.”
“What? Why?” asked Natalie.
“He thought it was suspicious that two hotties would want to date him,” said Stacy. “Somehow that’s less realistic than you wanting to date him? What an idiot. BTW, he sucks, and you are so much better off without him. Anyways. He left two minutes ago. I am assuming he’ll be heading back to his place, so your time…”
“…Is nearly up, shizz,” said Natalie. “Stacy, thank you so much. I’ll make sure the boys are outta there ASAP.”
“No problemo,” said Stacy before she hung up the phone.
Natalie turned the car on and hit the horn once. Hopefully, the guys had found the key and were on their way back to her already.
Bruce heard the honk and looked to Zach. Zach had heard it too. Zach motioned to the door. Bruce shook his head. They had come this far. They needed to find this frikkin’ key.
Bruce went through the laundry and Zach went back to the desk. They had torn the room apart. There had to be something they’d missed.
The desk had a computer, computer accessories, and some boxes. He’d sorted through the boxes already. Maybe the key was on the back of the computer monitor.<
br />
Nope, Zach had to figure something else out. He scanned the room. Was there anything he hadn’t seen?
That’s when he saw it.
Books. In a bookshelf. It was a small bookshelf with only a few books in it.
Zach dropped down off the desk and headed to the bookshelf which was next to Randall’s nightstand. Most of his books were sci-fi or fantasy reads, but one stuck out. It was a romance novel. Zach pulled the romance novel out and got a look from Bruce. Was Zach really about to take up precious time reading?
Nope.
Zach opened the book and shook it. The key fell out. It was on a silver necklace.
Zach put the book back and shook the necklace. Bruce looked. Zach had frikkin’ done it. Now they just had to get out of the house.
Natalie had watched as Randall’s car made its way into the driveway. She couldn’t honk the horn again. Where the heck were Bruce and Zach? And what would Randall do if he caught two furry koalas in his bedroom?
Bruce and Zach made their way back into the bathroom, and Bruce grabbed the screwdriver to pull the air vent panel back into place. They heard a door open. Shizz. Randall must’ve already gotten home.
Bruce and Zach walked through the air vent quickly and gingerly, trying not to make too much sound. They got to the exit and popped out, before quickly shifting into human form and changing. Nothing would be more suspicious than two handsome naked hunks. Zach reached into his pocket and passed Bruce the screws.
“Where’s the last screw?” whispered Bruce.
“What?” asked Zach.
“There are four screws,” said Bruce. “Find the last one.”
Bruce screwed the panel back onto the air vent, hoping to dear life that this wouldn’t make a sound, while Zach looked through the grass for the last screw. Zach ran his fingers through the grass and finally found the screw poking out of the dirt. He passed the screw to Bruce and Bruce quickly put it in the last hole.
Randall was home. That much they knew. Bruce pricked his ears up and listened. Maybe he could figure out where Randall was.