“Dang, Monica. Your behind was snoring up a storm and smiling at the same time. Who was you dreaming about, Drake’s cute ass?”
“Girl, you’s a fool.” Monica started cheesing. “Naw, I swear to God, I was dreaming about Dennis. He was still alive. We were chillin’, watching television, and I was braiding his hair some kind of way.”
Kanina didn’t know exactly what to say at that point. She had been trying to avoid any conversation involving Dennis or Jenette. Soon enough Monica would find out that her mother had literally sold Kayla to her parents. She would also find out that not one time since Monica had been locked up had Jenette thought to inquire about her daughter’s location or the date that she would be released from prison.
Night after night of showing up at the house, threatening to take Kayla if they didn’t give her money that she needed to buy dope, Jenette finally played herself. They knew she was bluffing, but they wanted to be protected with a little insurance just in case. Mr. Cooper had a lawyer friend of his draw up a legal document giving him and his wife temporary custody and guardianship of Kayla. It would be important to have if Jenette ever pushed their hand.
One of their neighbors was a notary public, and the next time that Jenette showed up having one of her crack attacks, the Coopers had him come over to bear witness to and notarize Jenette’s signing of the paperwork. She was so happy and elated to get $500 in her weather-beaten hands, Jenette never once glanced up the staircase to notice her youngest child shaking her head in disgust at yet another despicable act. Kayla was ashamed to been conceived and birthed from such a rotten monster’s infested womb.
Kanina was sympathetic to her friend. She knew the next few days would be kinda hard and full of plenty of major and minor adjustments. After twenty more minutes of driving, they got into the city.
“I know that you’re probably tired from driving, but can you do me a favor?” Monica had a serious look on her face.
“Yeah, girl. What is it?”
“Can you take me to the cemetery where Dennis is buried? I want to say good-bye.”
“You don’t even have to ask that, Monica. I understand.”
When they reached the gravesite, Kanina left her best friend to mourn as she walked quietly back to the car. Monica sat on the ground and made her peace with her little brother. She needed to get a lot of things off her mind, and she promised him that she was gonna make him proud of her one day.
“Dennis, I’m sorry that I left you alone with Mama,” she whispered. “I was only trying to make sure that we ate and I could keep clothes on y’all’s back. You know that I loved you more than life itself. I won’t let Kayla down like I did you, I swear to God!”
Monica had to try to rid herself of all the remorseful feelings she was carrying around. She needed closure to get on with the task of living. Going back to school and getting a degree was on top of her list. Dennis was gone, but she still had Kayla to consider. Now it would be just them. Monica knew Jenette was a lost cause, and she had no desire to share her life with her mom. As soon as she could get on her feet, she would be out of Jenette’s sight for good.
Chapter Nine
Kanina and Monica soon continued their journey home. The mood inside the car was upbeat considering the fact that they’d just left Dennis’s gravesite. Monica had found the closure she’d been seeking for months. Kanina turned onto Malcolm X Boulevard and was passing Monica’s block.
“Hey, you’re missing the turnoff.”
“No, I’m not. My parents want you to come and stay with us, Monica.”
“What are you talking about? Your mom and pops done already did enough. I can’t put them out anymore. I already owe them so much.” Monica was sincerely in their debt and humbled.
“Girl, stop bugging. We family. I know you didn’t think that we were gonna let you go back to Jenette’s crib, did you? Be for real!”
“I really hadn’t thought about it. I’m just happy to be free, even if I have to sleep on the floor. It’s better than being locked up.” Monica had a chill run through her body as she spoke.
“I know Jenette is your mother and all, and I don’t mean to talk shit about her, but come on now, Monica. Living back with her is like being in hell.” Kanina was giving it to Monica straight no chaser, regardless of hurting her friend’s feelings. “Your mother ain’t changed. She still ain’t shit. Now stop tripping and let’s go home. Besides, Kayla is out of school now, and I know she’s waiting for us.”
Monica agreed with one condition attached. “Okay, Kanina. I feel you, but can you at least swing me past Jenette’s to grab some of my stuff if it’s still there?”
Kanina busted a U-turn, drove down the drug-infested street, proceeded to pull up in front of the old, half-occupied apartment building that Monica used to call home. Litter filled the walkway, and a drunk was passed out on the curb as usual.
“Do you want me to go upstairs with you?” Kanina was leery about staying outside by herself, even in broad daylight. She hoped that Monica would say yes.
“I could use your help carrying my things.”
They both jumped out of the car after Kanina made sure to put her Club on the steering wheel and the alarm on alert. “Better safe than fucking sorry.” Kanina smirked. “These folks are off the chain on this block. Do ya ass still wanna lay ya head down in this hood now or what?”
“Girl, you ain’t never lied. These motherfuckers look even rougher than I remembered.” Monica giggled.
They jumped over the drunken derelict on the curb and ran up the stairs. As soon as they stepped foot in the door and took a whiff, they stumbled. The smell was almost unbearable, and both girls felt nauseated. Kanina placed her hand over her mouth and nose to try to block the odor. Monica’s eyes started burning from the stench, which was worse than prison. Being back in the place she once called home was starting to take her back down memory lane. Unfortunately, all her memories were not so great. She got a strange chill but shook it off. The pair went up flight after flight until reaching the fifth floor. Monica led the way as they got to Jenette’s door. She starting knocking repeatedly and got no response.
“Maybe I should leave a note.” Monica tried to sound optimistic as she looked over at Kanina.
“Knock harder. Maybe she’s asleep.” Kanina removed her hand from her face all of three seconds to talk before she felt dizzy.
Monica started pounding again and soon heard a door open across the hall. It was Miss Lila.
“Monica, is that you?” She was cautiously peeking out in the hall.
“Yes, Miss Lila, it’s me.”
Miss Lila opened her door all the way and stepped out in the hall to hug her former little neighbor. “Baby, how are you? I’m so glad to see that you made it home.” She pinched Monica’s cheeks and kissed her forehead. “Come on in and have a seat, you and your friend. I can fix y’all some cookies and milk or maybe a sandwich.”
They sat down on the couch that was covered with plastic, and they revealed their visit would be short.
Miss Lila, regardless of company, went through the routine of turning every single lock that was on her front door. She then went and sat down in her favorite chair. “It’s so good to see you, child. How is my little Kayla doing?”
“She’s fine, Miss Lila. She’s doing just fine.”
“That’s so good.” Miss Lila shook her head. “I always think about her and you. Y’all was always such good girls. I even say a prayer for Dennis every now and then. God rest his tormented soul.”
Monica was growing restless with all the formalities of going back down memory lane, and she cut straight to the chase. “Excuse me, Miss Lila. I don’t mean to interrupt you, but have you seen my mother today? I knocked on the door, and she didn’t answer.” Monica sighed. “Did she come in late? Do you think she’s asleep or something?”
“What are you talking about, child? What door?” Miss Lila seemed confused. “I haven’t seen Jenette in over four or five months now,”
she huffed.
Monica and Kanina were sitting all the way up on the edge of the couch, bewildered by her statement. Monica was close to being frantic. “Four or five months? What are you taking about, Miss Lila?”
Miss Lila hated to be the bearer of bad news, yet she had no choice. “I’m sorry, child. I thought you knew. That’s when the court bailiff came and enforced the eviction notice. They threw all of the contents of the apartment on the curb.” Miss Lila was getting disgusted as she spoke. “Your mama was somewhere getting high or drunk, and by the time she showed up, the neighborhood had taken what they wanted, which wasn’t much.” Miss Lila got up from her chair and got a box out of the closet. “Jenette had sold just about everything that wasn’t nailed down no sooner than they put your little brother into the ground.”
Kanina sat motionless as she watched Monica go into temporary shock. After a moment or two, Monica shook it off and thought about what Sandra and Miss Sims had said to her: “God never gives you more than you can stand.” Keeping that in mind, Monica gathered her thoughts and finally spoke.
“Well, Miss Lila, I really didn’t expect anything more than that from my mother. It should be against the law for some women to give birth, and Jenette is a perfect example. I don’t feel any animosity or resentment toward her, just pity.” Kanina and Miss Lila both nodded in total agreement with Monica. The bottom line was that Jenette was a lost cause. Monica tried her best to conceal the heartache that she was truly feeling. Jenette was still her mother, crack or no crack. “Well, Miss Lila, we have to be going now. I’ll make sure to bring Kayla by next time for a longer visit.”
“Okay, sweetheart.” Miss Lila reached down and picked up the box that she had gotten out of the closet. “Here, Monica. This is yours.”
“Mine? What is it?” Monica opened it up and instantly started crying like a baby.
“I went and got it off the curb. Nobody should be throwing away pictures.” Miss Lila smiled.
Monica was elated that her pictures were safe and sound. She opened up a manila envelope that was on the bottom, and a huge grin replaced the tears. “Thank you!”
“I figured that you would need that one day, so I took that, too.” Miss Lila chuckled.
Monica couldn’t believe it. The high school had mailed her diploma. With her box of snapshots and her high school diploma in hand, Monica and Kanina waited patiently as Miss Lila let them out of her fortress. They practically ran down all five flights and out the door to fresh air. They got in the car, and Kanina sped off as the two headed home.
* * *
Monica and Kanina finally arrived to a house filled with love. Mr. and Mrs. Cooper were standing on the front porch, waiting to greet their new houseguest. Kayla was doing cartwheels on the grass and didn’t see the girls turn into the driveway. Monica peered out the window and thanked God for keeping her little sister safe. When Kayla stopped doing flips and twists, she was dizzy. No sooner did her eyes focus on Kanina’s car than she darted over and almost pulled Monica out of the car.
“I missed you, Monica. Promise me you won’t go back to jail anymore. I was so lonely and sad. First you left, then Dennis got killed, and then Mama gave me away.”
It was obvious that Kayla had been through a lot of hurt and pain in a short matter of time, but she had still managed somehow to maintain an upbeat attitude.
“I like it here. I’ve got my own room, lots of books, and even my very own computer.”
“That’s great, Kayla. I’m glad that you’re happy.” Monica was trying her best to be brave, just like Kayla. “You know that I won’t ever leave you again. I swear.”
The two sisters hugged for what seemed like hours before the Coopers interrupted. “Come on now, you two. We have an entire lifetime to hug. I fixed a nice, big welcome-home dinner for Monica.” Mrs. Cooper was smiling while wiping her hands on her apron. “Everybody go and wash up, and I’ll put the food on the table.”
Kanina and her father grabbed Monica’s two small bags out of the car. Kayla snatched her big sister’s arm while practically dragging her in the house. Mrs. Cooper had prepared a feast fit for a king. Monica was in heaven and ate second helpings of everything.
After dinner was over, Kayla showed Monica every single book that she owned and also every A paper that she had received from school over the past year. By the time that was over, Monica was exhausted. Kanina already had taken Monica’s things to her room. It was the first time that she could have privacy.
Monica went into the bathroom and ran the hottest water in the tub that her body could stand, and she filled it with bubbles just like she daydreamed about night after night in prison. Kanina and her mom had purchased Monica pajamas and a room full of personal items that she needed. Monica undressed and eased her way down in the bath. She soon fell fast asleep, while soaking the entire jail ordeal off of her body.
Chapter Ten
A few months had passed since the day of Monica’s release, and a lot of changes had taken place. After some rest and getting situated, she’d enrolled at the community college just as she had planned before her arrest. Although Dennis was gone and Kayla was happy living with the Coopers in a stable household, Monica still wanted to pursue her dream of obtaining a degree in business management. One day she hoped to own her very own dress shop and make something more of herself than being a common shoplifter.
In between classes, she would write letters to Sandra, keeping her informed of what she was up to. Monica knew how vital mail was to a person who was locked down. If it weren’t for the letters she received from Kayla and Kanina, Monica knew that she’d have been lost in the system. Monica had yet to find a job, so sending any money to her former cellmate was temporarily put on hold. She intended to, but shit was tight. Being young and black was hard enough, but when you mixed in a felony record, finding a job was damn near an impossible feat. Mr. and Mrs. Cooper weren’t putting any pressure on Monica, but she still felt under foot and wanted to be on her own. She was used to being independent and taking care of herself.
Every night, Monica and Kanina talked about moving out and one day getting their own apartment. They calculated that they needed a little over $1,400 to get them started. Kanina didn’t have a criminal record, so getting a job was slightly easier for her, plus she had savings bonds that her parents had been purchasing for her since she was born. Monica just had to come up with her half.
Time and again, the expressions on employers’ faces when reviewing applications ranged from sympathetic to downright rude. Monica was now no more than an awful statistic. She was one of many released from prison who were shunned and looked upon as a throwaway citizen. Aggravated by being unemployed, and having no apparent job prospects in sight, Monica decided to return to the only thing she knew would earn her a constant flow of money: “borrowing.” It was in her blood, and Monica was ready to put everything she’d learned from Sandra to work and go hard!
* * *
Monica sat in the parking lot alone inside of the used car that she’d managed to get on the humble from a crackhead for a hundred bucks. If they were trying to get on, they’d sell their own mama for a hit. The filthy car had rust spots on the doors and a huge dent across the hood. Three of the tires were bald, and the interior was fucked, but the only thing that mattered to her at the time was that she had sounds. The radio was at least able to pump out Monica’s favorite jazz station.
She sat back meditating and getting herself in the zone so that she could accomplish the task at hand. It had been almost eighteen months now since the young girl had been caught, arrested, convicted, and thrown into prison. It was no way in hell that she was ready for a repeat performance of that ordeal. Monica reached down in her slightly oversized purse and pulled out a tube of cherry-flavored lip gloss. After checking her face in the mirror, she was set to put Sandra’s plan into effect.
Monica confidently strolled to the front of Macy’s and took a deep breath. She swung open the doors and did her thing. First
stop was the men’s department. Doing exactly as Sandra had instructed, Monica made sure to ask the security guard at the entrance directions to where she was going. She asked him if he could show her the way because she was running late for her father’s birthday lunch and had to get him a present. Just as Sandra had predicted, the guard was disarmed by Monica’s act of being helpless, and he quickly jumped in to be her knight in shining armor. Sandra was correct. All men, black or white, old or young, short or tall, loved to feel important or needed. They loved a woman in distress or in search of their help, especially the ones who were young and pretty like Monica.
The saleslady saw Monica walking with the guard, and she went on pricing merchandise on the other side of the aisle.
“Thank you for being so nice to me.” Monica gave the middle-aged man a sexy grin as she touched his arm. “I truly appreciate it.”
“Anytime, young lady.” His eyes were glued to Monica’s tight-fitting sweater. “Anytime at all.” He watched her round ass sway from side to side as she walked away in her snug-fitting jeans.
“Okay, that part was easy. Now for part two,” she mumbled to herself.
Upon entering menswear, she marched directly to the leathers that were displayed near the back corner. She slipped out the miniature wire and bolt cutters that were tucked and concealed in her sleeve, and she went to work. Monica made her first target a cream quilted three-quarter-length coat, priced at $980. That was followed by a black butter-soft jacket with a silk lining, priced at $875. She pulled a Macy’s garment bag discreetly out of her purse and smoothly slipped it over the two leather coats. Just like that, it was done with, no noise and no fuss. With both in tow, along with a couple of eighty-five-dollar belts that matched the coats, Monica smiled at the guard. She thanked him once again as she pranced out the door all in less than fifteen minutes.
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