His breath created a ripple of pleasure in her ear that raced down her body and settled, quite alarmingly, between her legs. Damn… she had to watch herself here. She really could fall for this guy who seemed to innocently flirt with her mind, her body, and her soul. Jeez, concentrate on the dance. He wasn't for her, she mentally rebuked herself. Besides, it was obvious from all his late night absences that particular space in his life was already occupied. Yet somehow, the thought of him in another woman's arms did make her back stiffen a little.
He twirled her out, and for some unknown reason, she found herself letting go of his hand and standing there, staring at him. He stood, inhaling deeply, and stared right back, as though wondering what she was going to do.
Casey felt the surge of determination rising in her veins. Slowly, deliberately, her fingers grasped her green skirt and, clutching it to her hip, she actually stomped her foot in challenge!
Luke seemed startled for just a moment. She saw it in the slight widening of his eyes, and then watched as he slowly pulled back his shoulders while bringing both of his hands to his hips. He not only stomped, but threw in a few extra intricate steps. Casey saw the challenge was accepted and sighed deeply, drawing in energy from someplace and willing her feet to perform as she had practiced with Rosa.
Attitude. Now was the time to bring it on full force.
From some untapped reservoir deep within, she found more attitude than she had originally thought she possessed. Lifting her chin, she stared right back and answered his footwork with a staccato of her own and a flip of her petticoats to show him she wasn't about to be intimidated.
"Brava!" Luke broke the tension by clapping and laughing. "I see you have been practicing… Rosalinda has been helping you?"
Casey raised one eyebrow and grinned slyly. She was pleased by his praise; even Manuel had stopped playing and was tapping the side of his guitar. "Yes, the girl has been wonderful," she exhaled, allowing her shoulders to relax. "Rosalinda said all I needed was more attitude." She pronounced the last word with her best Spanish accent. Suddenly she felt a little let down that he had stopped the momentum they'd been building in their dance. Especially the thrust of her newly found attitude, for if she wasn't mistaken, she had just seen something in his eyes… something with primal intensity aimed directly at her.
He now appeared delighted and moved across the tiles to her. "A very good subject… attitude. Perhaps, after this dance, you would allow me to escort you through the garden once again?" He finished by tilting his head invitingly… with that smile again.
It was the first time he had asked her to stay after the lessons, and she found it pleased her greatly. If he wanted to talk about attitude, fine. She'd talk about anything, just to be in his presence, for there was no denying that there was something unique about the man. He was like no one else she had even dreamed could exist, and she just wanted to be around him, to be in his company. Everything didn't seem so scary then; as crazy as it might seem, it was starting to make sense. He had the uncanny ability to calm her down, to soothe her fears, to—
"If you are otherwise entertained, we could always speak at some other—"
"No," she interrupted, and then realized he might be confused. "I meant… yes," she blurted out. "I would love to walk with you again."
Jeez… did that sound desperate or what?
A quick smile of agreement and then he held out his hands again. "Let us begin once more then." He nodded to Manuel to resume playing, and Casey came back into his arms. "We shall surprise more than a few guests next week. You are quite good, Casey."
Hating the betrayal of her own blush, Casey said, "Oh, I don't know, Luke. Here with you is one thing, but dancing in front of others… ?" She turned slightly away from him and added, "I… I just don't know."
"It's about trust, Casey. With me, yes," he softly said, touching her arm to turn her back to face him. "But more so with you. Trust yourself."
"Myself?" she said, gazing up into his penetrating eyes. "I've never even attempted to dance like this before in my life, and now with a little less than a week's practice, you're saying I can be trusted not to make a fool out of myself in front of hundreds of strangers?"
He laughed. Laughed!
"I'm glad you find me so amusing," she muttered, wanting to slap his shoulder.
"There will not be hundreds of people. Okay, maybe a hundred," he chuckled.
"Oh, okay then. That makes a big difference. Now I feel so much better." She surrendered and joined his laughter.
"Listen," he said lowly, grabbing her attention with a more serious face. "Trusting yourself is merely believing in your own self-worth. I'm telling you, Casey, you are a good dancer and you can trust that gift."
Well, she'd always thought she was a decent dancer, but she'd never had a partner like this, and now it was getting just too serious with the thought of an impending performance.
"Hey, just have fun," he added with a lighter tone. "This is a dance of passion, señorita, the male and female energies coming together as equals. It's quite a show."
Male and female energies coming together as equals… what exactly did that mean? Sounded more like making love to her. "I don't want to perform any show," she muttered.
"What do you want?"
And what could she answer to that? That she wanted it to be private, like this… ? Wasn't that the reason everyone thought she was learning this dance? A performance? No one suggested it was for personal reasons. "What I want…" She paused, refusing to allow the thought of what she really wanted to enter her brain again. "Is not to look foolish," she finally answered.
"If you haven't learned yet to trust yourself, at least momentarily"—he winked—"trust me. Ginger Rogers has got nothing on you, señorita. I assure you, you will not look foolish. You will look equal to anyone who may be watching. And they will know it."
She sighed, thinking about how he always seemed to turn all her fears around. How did he know just what to say, to respond so perfectly to how she was feeling? It was eerie, and yet comforting at the same time. How could she not want to stay around him? What woman wouldn't?
"Okay," she said resignedly. "Let's continue practicing then."
Nodding, Luke pulled her closer. As she placed her hand in his, Casey knew that though she was fighting it like crazy, she was losing her inner battle. She really, actually, insanely, was starting to fall in love with the most weird person she had ever encountered in her entire life!
She couldn't help it. She laughed at herself.
And it felt good.
A half hour later, she was sweating from her efforts and her legs were aching and tense. They had danced the fandango and flamenco until she felt like a weary woman with a rapidly waning attitude. She wanted to call a halt to the lesson and walk in the garden, anything but have to pull together more energy to match Luke's.
"You are tired, señorita," he said, releasing her. He turned quickly toward Manuel and thanked the man in Spanish. The older gentleman got up and bowed slightly, tipping his floppy straw hat and leaving them.
"Gracias, señor," Casey called out with a smile to the kindly man who had played so well, and for so long.
"I apologize for becoming so carried away," Luke exhaled as he walked toward a table where a pitcher of water and goblets were waiting.
Watching his fluid movement, she realized during the last half hour Luke's hold on her had been less rigid, more relaxed, as though he was now trusting she could carry more of her own weight in this dance. "Yes, I think I've had enough for now," she admitted with a smile, pleased at her realization. It was very complimentary, even if it was raising the bar another rung and she had to focus more now. Still, it was nice to know that he respected her.
The sun was still high and Luke poured fresh water into both goblets and handed one to her. "You have much stamina, señorita." He smiled, raising his glass to her in toast.
She accepted the goblet with a nod. Hmm. That was an interesting comm
ent, she thought. Don't contemplate it now, Casey, you haven't the strength, she mentally advised herself. "That was a good lesson. You had me concentrating to keep up."
She watched as he drained the goblet and couldn't help staring at the movement of his Adam's apple while he swallowed. She had to remind herself it was water she was thirsty for and not anything else. Bringing her own glass to her lips, she took a huge gulp and then turned toward the garden path. "I need more shade," she announced, and starting walking. She didn't even care now if he wanted to walk with her. Maybe it would be better if he didn't. She was so rattled by the realization that she was falling in love that she was going to need some privacy to figure this out.
"Your rhythm is excellent, Casey," he said, coming to walk beside her. "It's been quite some time since I have danced."
"Really?" She glanced at him and smiled. "I would think you would do it a lot… considering you're such a good dancer."
What was this? Were they verbally dancing now? There was just too much irony with the innuendos flying between them, Casey mentally suspected.
"Well, thank you, but it's been quite a while. I believe it was my last visit here," he said, looking up to the branches of the trees and nodding. "It was about four years ago."
"Wow… I mean, why were you here? Did someone else get thrown back and you—"
"No," he interrupted, as he held his hands behind his back and settled into the stroll. "I was alone." He glanced at her and grinned. "Not that time can make you forget, you understand, but you gave me a good lesson in remembering that I can dance… as I tried to keep up with you."
Her heart expanded even more with his genuine smile. "I think you have that backward. I was trying to keep up with you."
"Oh, you think so?"
"Yes." Sheesh, wasn't it obvious to him?
He stopped abruptly, and after a few steps, she turned back to him.
"You really have no idea about your self-worth, do you?" he asked.
It came right out of left field, no preparation, no gentle setup for such a personal question. Flustered, she tried to get her mind to function. "What are you talking about? I… I like myself," she stammered. It was a way to buy time until some neuron found a receptive connection in her brain… somewhere. Jeez, this man could rattle her.
"Yes, but I'm talking about your self-worth, Casey."
Deep down she knew what he was talking about and wished she could change the subject quickly, as it sounded like it might begin a dissection of her ego. She really didn't want to go there right now… It was enough that this man could read her feelings so well; she didn't want to reveal anything more.
"I wish you could see yourself through my eyes."
His words interrupted the barriers she was mentally building to shield her emotions, and a pull took hold of her to look up into his eyes. She wished she could too! It sure was a different picture than she was seeing.
After what seemed like a very long pause, he asked, "Would you like to know what I see, Casey?"
She could imagine herself, like Alice, falling further down that rabbit's hole if she even acknowledged she would love to hear his answer. "Okay, what?" God, she was so easy!
Walking again, he passed her and continued down the path with an invitational wave to join him as he said, "I see a woman with great potential who, for whatever reason, has hidden from it… yet she is seeing glimpses of it, but believes it is better to be humble and not admit it to herself, or anyone else for that matter." She swore she could hear the smile on his face as he continued. "Actually, it is very funny to watch someone pretending to be less than who they are." He paused, turning back to her, as though waiting for her to resume their walk. "Haven't you ever secretly thought that a greater destiny awaited you?"
She almost stumbled into his arms with that last statement. The first part felt like a nudge and the last like a shove, as if to awaken her from sleepwalking. She sure as hell felt like something was happening as this man seemed to lead her down a path not only in a garden but also in her mind. How much did she dare reveal to him? How vulnerable would it make her? Unsure in this exposed territory, she merely shrugged.
"I think you have," he added, when it was obvious she wasn't about to speak. "I think all humans do at some point in their life. They may have been young, and have forgotten, but I'm sure they did. It's part of the human condition, that realization you are more than what you are being told you are. That you are here for a purpose. Your life is no accident."
"Okay," she admitted, deciding it didn't make much difference now if everyone thought it at least once in their lives. "There was always this nagging thought," she murmured. "I mean, I…" How could she explain this?
"I know," he answered in a soft voice, and then began to walk again.
She quietly walked beside him. For once she didn't feel the need to fill the silence with words. He knew the feeling she was talking about, as though something was waiting for her…, pulling her forward through time to find her purpose. And somehow, as crazy as it might seem, she was also beginning to feel she might have traveled back in time to find it.
After a few minutes, Luke said in a quiet voice, "You brought up a good subject earlier. Attitude. It ties in well to self-worth, don't you think? Ironically, our mischievous Rosalinda hit upon a powerful topic."
Casey grinned. "She certainly has attitude aplenty. I like her a lot."
"As do I. She has not yet lost her belief in the magic of love."
Surprised, she asked, "You think love is magical?"
"Don't you?"
She shrugged. "I don't really know."
"I've seen love transform situations that seemed hopeless. Nothing physical was necessary, just love and its many derivatives."
Derivatives? Casey was wondering what he meant when he began to answer her mental question. She was getting used to that now.
"Like forgiveness or humor."
"Hmm, yes, you're right. I've seen that too. So love is an attitude?"
He glanced at her and grinned. "Love is magic."
She stopped again and waited for him to halt and turn around. He did.
"Okay, what are you? A time traveler? A magician?"
"Both," he answered as she watched that twinkle come back into his eyes.
"Are you one of those New Age people with all their belief in love and light and crystals and… bizarre stuff?" It was time to find out.
He chuckled. "First of all, there is nothing new in New Age. Truths are timeless, and they can be found everywhere, in all cultures and movements. I do not belong to any organization or church, if that's what you mean."
"Well, that's good, 'cause I don't understand them. How can everything be all light and love? It's not. In the real world ugly things happen. It's just not realistic."
He was nodding. "There is darkness. And that comes from the other side of love, the denial of it. That's fear. You know how fear makes you feel, don't you?"
She couldn't help it, she laughed. "Ah, yeah! I think I've had a few good opportunities in the last week to experience that one."
"Yes, you have," he answered with a widening smile. "How did it make you feel?"
"Scared!"
"And did it make you feel heavy? Tired? Like you just wanted to lie down and not get up?"
She paused, recalling the sensations. "Yes, it did."
He nodded and then waved his hand toward the path to continue their walk. "Fear carries a very heavy frequency to it. It's a difficult thing to handle when you have so much gravity pulling you down to begin with. Adding that band of energy can make life grueling." When she caught up with him, he asked, "And how did you feel when you surrendered to the situation, accepted where you were, made a choice to stop fighting it and stop putting up resistance?"
She didn't want to admit that she was actually enjoying herself more now than at any other time of her life. There was just so much of his being right she could acknowledge!
"Are you a preacher or some
thing?" Now, wouldn't that just be her luck!
He threw back his head and laughed again, this time from his belly. "I am not a preacher. I apologize if I sound as though I have been preaching, Casey. It was not my intention."
She couldn't help joining in his good humor. Chuckling, she said, "No, not preaching, but everything you say does sound… I don't know, like everything is about life and how… how…"
"How magical it is?" he volunteered.
She stopped chuckling. "Yes, like that. How do you do that? How do you take everything I say and make it so… so meaningful? I don't get it. Who are you?"
The twinkle in his eyes was even brighter when he said, "I am no different than you… just a fellow traveler."
Yeah, right! She began shaking her head with her own abstract amusement. "No, see… I was born on the East Coast of this country… on this planet!" She mentally mimicked his inflection: A fellow traveler, indeed! "C'mon, tell me… where do you come from? What planet are you from? I mean, people can't just up and time-travel, like it's a freakin' vacation or something!" Okay, that should put his asteroid in park for a while.
"Really?" he broke in without hesitation. "Explain you and me walking this garden path then. In this moment you could very well imagine it is the year 2000, and although you are dressed in a costume, right now just imagine, outside that wall are automobiles and telephones and TVs and computers. For this moment you could imagine that, and yet something within you… something you can't define, reaffirms you have done something few others have. You have time-traveled into the year 1878. Quick," he ordered, as he suddenly grabbed her shoulders and stared into her eyes. "Tell me what is in your heart. You can't see the house. Where are you? Are you in the past, a place you have already visited? Are you in the future, a place you are only wishing to visit? Or are you here, on this path, right here, right now… where all the presents are?"
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