“Lace. Look at me. Lacy.”
Dane’s voice wavered in her foggy state. Lacy felt the rough wood of the pier scratch the bottom of her toes as she pretended to fall off the edge. She felt the cold water against her skin as her toes broke through the surface and she slipped beneath, her eyes closed tight, as if she were seven years old again. She’d popped up above the surface quickly, kicking her feet wildly, excited and worried about fooling her parents. Something strong and cold—a car, it had to be a car—dragged its full length against her thigh—hard and painful. Spears of anguish seared through her. A car. I’ve been hit by a car! The water turned red around her, and it had taken a second before she realized it was blood. Her blood. Wait. That can’t be right. Cars don’t go in the water. Daddy! Daddy!
Dane’s face blurred before her. Her heartbeat was drowned out by the sound of Dane’s insistent voice.
“Lacy!”
Someone’s hand touched her cheek. They were pulling her toward them. She was being carried, laid on her back. Lacy flailed, trying to get away from the water, but her arms were met with something firm. A mattress. I’m on a bed.
“Lace, you’re okay.”
Dane. I’m with Dane, on a boat. Reality crept back to Lacy as Savannah’s voice came through her foggy mind.
“I’ll get water,” Savannah said.
“Panic attack. I’ve seen it a million times,” Hugh said.
The right side of the bed sank beneath someone’s weight. Then Dane’s arms were around her, holding her tight, comforting her. She could smell him. Dane. Dane.
His breath was warm on her cheek. “It’s okay, Lacy. I’m right here. You’re safe.”
Safe. I’m safe. Lacy blinked, trying to push away the memory. She was cold, so very cold. Even with Dane holding her, she still trembled. She held tight to him, her eyes finally coming into focus. What the hell happened?
“I’m…I’m sorry,” she whispered.
“It’s okay,” Dane assured her, kissing her forehead.
Savannah came rushing through the door—the door that just an hour earlier Lacy had locked so she and Dane could fool around.
“Is she okay?” Savannah handed a cup of water to Dane.
“She’s gonna be just fine.” Dane sat up, and Lacy wrapped her arms around his waist and clung tightly to him. “Lace, drink some water.” He helped Lacy take a sip, steadying her shaking hands.
Lacy nodded. “I’m okay,” she said, avoiding Savannah’s worried stare.
“What happened? One minute we were talking, and the next, Lacy looked like she’d seen a ghost,” Savannah said.
Lacy covered her scar with her hand, and a shiver ran through her again. She moved closer to Dane, wishing she could crawl beneath the safety of his skin.
“I can take us back in,” Hugh offered. “Why don’t you stay with Lacy? Savannah, let’s give them some privacy.” Not only did Hugh race cars, but he’d also spent a few summers racing boats.
“You gonna be okay? She’s a big one,” Dane asked.
His eyes never wavered from Lacy; his grip remained strong and secure. There was no doubt in Lacy's mind that he was not going to leave her side—even if it meant staying out on the boat all night.
“Sheesh. Piece of cake,” Hugh said.
Hugh and Savannah left them alone, and the room became excruciatingly quiet, bringing Lacy’s embarrassment to the forefront.
“Lace, talk to me,” he urged.
“I’m so embarrassed.” What is wrong with me? Lacy hadn’t thought of her run-in with the shark in such detail for years. Why would it send her into such a tizzy after all that time? Why hadn’t she seen some clue over the years that she was that scared? She grasped for answers, wishing Danica were there with her. She’d have the answer. She’d help her to understand what was going on in her crazy head.
“Don’t be silly. The first time I went down in a shark cage, I freaked. Really freaked.” He smiled. Dane reached up and tucked a wayward curl behind her ear. “Want to tell me about it?”
I’d rather be locked up with Jeffrey Dahmer. Lacy shook her head.
“Okay. I’m here if you want to.”
Slowly, the tension in Lacy’s body drained, the shaking subsided, and she realized that Danica had already given her the advice she needed. Her sister’s voice ran through her mind. He deserves to know. She needed to tell Dane what she’d been through, even if she didn’t understand the depth of her fears.
“You said you thought you were afraid of sharks, but I had no idea it ran so deep,” Dane said.
Neither did I. He’d never want to see her after this nonsense. Hell, she didn’t even want to be around herself, but if she’d learned one thing from her mother’s affair with her father when he was still married to Danica and Kaylie’s mother, it was that living honestly wasn’t just the right thing to do—it was the only way to live. Filled with doubts over what might come next, she drew courage from his strength.
“I want to talk about it.” No, I don’t, but I should.
Dane didn’t rush her, or push her to spill her guts. He simply folded her hand into his and stroked her back. He snuggled against her, and Lacy couldn’t remember a time when she’d felt so loved, which she knew was completely ridiculous. He was being kind, comforting, nothing more. She had to remember that. He was doing what anyone else would do in that situation. Was he? Would any of the men she’d dated have done the same? She doubted it. She thought most of them wouldn’t have known what to do. How does he?
Savannah appeared in the doorway. “Are you guys okay?” She walked into the room slowly and touched Dane’s shoulder. “What can I do?”
Dane looked up at his sister. So much love and appreciation passed between the two of them in that instant that Lacy’s question was answered without ever being asked. Of course he knew how to handle silent fears and unspoken emotions. As the second-eldest, he must have cared for his siblings in some fashion after his mother’s death.
“We’re okay,” Dane said. “Thanks, Vanny.”
Vanny. She loved the way they were there for one another and the way Savannah looked at her, with tenderness in her green eyes that matched Dane’s concern—absent of judgment and filled with empathy.
“Okay. Hugh’s got everything under control, so take your time.” She came to the side of the bed and touched Lacy’s shoulder. “The first time I had to meet with a celebrity, I had a panic attack. I was struck numb. It took me twenty minutes to remember my name.” She smiled. “I think it’s a show of strength in some ways.” She shrugged when Lacy crinkled her nose in question. “Think about it. It’s easy to be suave and cool, but it takes real courage to come back after falling flat in front of others.” She bent down and whispered in Lacy’s ear, as if she had read her mind, “Hang in there. He’s worth it.”
Lacy looked at her then and was surprised when Savannah squeezed her shoulder. She smiled again, feeling the warmth and generosity of another Braden. She watched Savannah leave the room and took a deep breath.
“She’s so nice to me,” she said.
“She likes you. I can tell.” Dane placed his hand beneath her chin and lifted her face so she was looking into his eyes. “I like you.”
She smiled and dropped her eyes. I like you too—too much. They sat quietly for the next few minutes, the boat moving swiftly, the gentle rocking soothing Lacy’s worry.
“It was a shark,” she said, touching her scar. “I was seven.”
“I wondered,” he said, and covered her hand with his.
“Why?”
“At first I wasn’t sure. It could have been a rock-climbing accident, or maybe a viscous fight with sandpaper—that you lost. I work with sharks, Lacy. There isn’t much I haven’t seen.”
“Right.” Of course you’d know.
“It could have been a hundred things, but when I saw your reaction to Savannah’s comments and the way you reached for your scar. You were kicking your feet, thrashing around like you were swimmin
g, which is very different from running, I might add.” He brought her hand to his lips and kissed it.
“We were in Bora Bora, at this restaurant, which was more like a hut on stilts. I jumped into the water next to the kitchen.” Her eyes remained trained on her scar.
“And that’s where they threw the excess and rotten fish and meat, which drew the sharks,” he said.
“How did you know?” How did my parents not know?
“You’re talking about twenty years ago, on a remote island. It’s not like the United States, where everything is micromanaged. I’ve done a lot of research, Lacy. There’s little that I haven’t heard about or seen when it comes to sharks.” He placed his hand on her scar, and when she tried to move it away, he held firm. “Sharks don’t go looking for humans, Lace. You were in their chum bucket. I wish you would have told me.”
So you could end it before we even got started? You can’t get serious with someone who is afraid of sharks. “I didn’t realize I was that afraid,” she said honestly.
“You went into the water seamlessly in Nassau.”
He held her gaze, and Lacy could see that he was waiting for an explanation of some sort. She sifted through her mind, reaching for something, anything that might explain why the fear returned at that moment—but she drew a blank and finally looked away. “I don’t understand any of it.” But I know now that it’s a problem—a big problem.
“We’re all afraid of something,” he said.
Lacy inched away from the safety of his arms. It wasn’t fair to allow him to be close to her. After what she’d just experienced, she was keenly aware that the fear was bigger than any emotion she could control. Or maybe even overcome. Dane deserved to be with someone he could share his life with, and his life meant his work, his travels—his career. I can’t let myself fall for you any more than I already have. We can’t be together. I can’t ruin your life. God help me.
Chapter Eight
IN THE SAFETY of her room at the inn, Lacy flopped across her bed facedown and buried her head under a pillow. Less than five minutes later, she was startled by several frantic knocks on the door. She groaned into the mattress.
“I know you’re in there, Lacy. Open up.”
Kaylie.
“Go away,” Lacy yelled into the mattress. She didn’t really want Kaylie to go away, but she didn’t want to get up from the safety of her hiding place. If only she could hide there forever.
“Open up or I’ll tell housekeeping that I’m afraid you’re committing suicide and they’ll open the door.”
Lacy reluctantly climbed off the bed and threw the door open. “You are such a drama queen.”
Kaylie rushed in, grabbed Lacy’s hand, and pulled her over to the bed, where they sat side by side.
“How did you even know I was here?” Lacy asked, wanting to crawl beneath her covers and hide again.
Kaylie’s skin had already turned golden brown from just one afternoon in the sun. She wore her hair in a high ponytail, which swung from side to side with each of her fast movements. “Savannah texted Josh and told him that Hugh was bringing the boat in and asked him to find me and Danica. She was worried about you.”
Lacy groaned and fell backward on the bed, covering her face with her hands. “I’m mortified.”
Kaylie got up to answer another knock at the door.
“Where is she?” Danica pushed past Kaylie and rushed to Lacy’s side. “Are you okay? How are you feeling? What happened?”
“Give her time to breathe,” Kaylie said with a sigh.
“I just want to go home.” Lacy sat up and faced her sisters’ concerned glares.
“You poor girl,” Danica said. She sat down beside Lacy and wrapped her arm around her shoulder.
“She had a panic attack. She didn’t break a leg,” Kaylie said. She plopped down next to Lacy. “She’s embarrassed, not hurt. She flipped out in front of Dane. Wouldn’t you be embarrassed?”
“May I just remind you that I passed out on my wedding day?” Danica cast a harsh glare at Kaylie.
“Yeah, yeah. And I went into labor at my baby shower.” Kaylie’s twins, Lexi and Trevor, were now three years old.
“Can we focus on me for a minute?” Lacy said louder than she meant to. “Danica, what the hell happened to me? Savannah was talking about seeing sharks, and suddenly I was seven years old again. I don’t get it. After twenty years? Why did it all come back like that?” Lacy shook her head and twisted out from between her sisters. She rose to her feet and crossed her arms over her chest, pacing in her cover-up and bathing suit. “What am I going to do now?”
“What do you mean? It’s almost four o’clock. Shower, dress, and we’ll go to the family function, have dinner, and move past it,” Kaylie said. She walked to Lacy’s closet. “Want me to help you get ready?”
“Jesus, Kay. Give her a minute to figure this out.” Danica rose and leaned against the dresser. “Lacy, it was a panic attack. That’s not all that uncommon, and there’s nothing to be embarrassed about.”
“Oh, right. A guy like Dane doesn’t need to deal with a girl who’s afraid of the one thing he deals with every day. A guy like Dane doesn’t need someone who freaks out without any warning. A guy like Dane—” Lacy swallowed past the growing lump in her throat. When had she begun to care so much?
Danica stood before her, stopping her from her frantic pacing. “A guy like Dane cared enough to ask me to check on you.”
“A guy like Dane is lucky to date you, sis,” Kaylie said. “I don’t care if he’s gorgeous and wealthy. You’re stunning, smart, funny, and incredibly sexy.” She winked, and Lacy couldn’t help but smile.
“You’re my sisters. You’re supposed to make me feel better.” She covered her face with her hands and groaned.
“Don’t worry. I’m right here, and I’ll stay with you all night if you need me to,” Danica assured her.
“What if it wasn’t a panic attack? What if it’s something else? Something worse?” She gasped a breath. “What if—”
Danica grabbed her shoulders. “Breathe, honey, or you’ll end up all anxious again. This all makes sense.”
“Did he really ask you to check on me?” Of course he did. She thought of the concern she’d heard in his voice and the empathy she’d seen in his eyes when she’d regained her focus on the boat.
“He really did,” Danica answered.
“He probably wanted to make sure that I wasn’t an insurance liability,” Lacy snapped. She didn’t believe her own words, but she couldn’t allow herself to continue to think about Dane as a prospective boyfriend and lover anymore. It would be a mistake to get any closer to him. She needed to forget how comfortable things were between them and the way he was so attentive to her. Lacy had to let him go. She couldn’t be a noose around his neck, and the last thing she wanted was to be around sharks now that she knew how deeply the fear was seeded. She had to concentrate on getting home, where she could lose herself in her work and focus on things other than the feel of his lips on her skin or the strength of his arms as he held her. Stop it!
“Oh please. That man needs to worry about insurance like you need to worry about your hair being too straight,” Kaylie teased.
Danica shook her head at Kaylie’s lighthearted comment. “Lacy, panic attacks can be managed. I know this probably scared you, but you can learn to deal with your fears.”
Lacy shook her head. She was too confused to deal with any of that right then. When she closed her eyes, she saw Dane. She smelled his cologne; she felt his touch. When she opened them, the overwhelming panic that consumed her on the boat came rushing back. She wished she could walk the fine line in the middle without teetering toward either side, but that was unrealistic, and Lacy saw that as clearly as she saw no way out of attending the family function in less than an hour.
“I don’t know, Danica. I was totally blindsided by this. I realized today that all those trips my mom took me on in the summers, trips to the library, museums—e
verywhere but to the beach—they were probably guided by a well-defined plan to keep me from freaking out. I can’t go with Dane tonight.” Lacy clenched her teeth and reached for her phone.
Kaylie grabbed her arm, stopping her in her tracks. “Before you get too wrapped up in all of this, don’t you think you should talk to Dane about it? I mean, the guy probably knows a zillion people who are afraid of sharks. He might not be put off by this at all.”
Lacy stared into her older sister’s eyes, which usually looked so much like her own, but at that moment, Kaylie’s eyes held hope, while Lacy knew hers reflected a brick wall that she was unwilling to force her way through.
She pulled her arm free. “Kaylie, I’ve seen him once in fifteen months. I’m nothing more than a blip on his radar screen—and a short blip at that.” Lacy turned away before her sisters could see the tears in her eyes.
Sea of Love (Love in Bloom: The Bradens, Book 4) Contemporary Romance Page 7