by Leigh Bale
Seeing him sitting by himself, Katie felt her heart give a powerful squeeze. She naturally homed in on him like a heat-seeking missile and couldn’t help wondering why. She told herself it was because he was Chrissy’s dad. It surely had nothing to do with his rustic good looks. Or did it?
When Chrissy waved at him, he gave Katie an uncertain smile and winked. At least he hadn’t winced when he’d heard his daughter call out to him. Katie realized how much courage it must have taken for him to come here today. A powerful surge of compassion swept over her when she contemplated how hard he was trying to be a better man. Going around town to perform good deeds and right the wrongs he’d done as a youth. Coming here to church when he wasn’t sure he’d be welcomed.
Charlie swiveled in his seat, saw Reese sitting there and immediately stood. Without a word, he clasped his cane in one hand and Chrissy’s hand in the other and led her to the back pew, where they joined Reese. Numerous people watched this scene, leaning their heads close as they whispered together.
This time, Katie couldn’t contain her groan. Great! Just great. Having raised her daughter out of wedlock, she thought she’d become immune to the gossip. Where Reese was concerned, she was wrong. Now her family was sitting in the back pew. Without her. She was the one who was all alone. No matter what he’d done to her, unintentionally or otherwise, Katie couldn’t abandon Reese. She was ashamed that it had been her father who first stepped forward to do the right thing and welcome him to church.
Standing, she hurried to the back to join her family. She almost bit her tongue when Charlie saw her coming and quickly reached over and pulled Chrissy in to sit between him and Reese. Since her father sat against the end of the pew, Katie had no choice but to sit next to Reese.
“What are you doing here?” she whispered as she settled beside him.
“Honestly, I was wondering the same thing.”
His boyish grin and sparkling eyes did something to her insides. No matter what promises she’d made to herself about not becoming attached to him again, she couldn’t help wanting to comfort him. Especially after the things he’d told her the day before.
“Don’t look so shocked, Katie. The building isn’t going to fall in on top of us.” He glanced up at the ceiling. “At least, I don’t think it will.”
“I...I’m glad you’re here. There’s nothing wrong with worshipping God. In fact, I think most of the problems in the world would be cured if people would include God in their lives,” she said.
He lifted one shoulder. “I figured it was time.”
“It’s good to see you here.” Charlie reached behind Chrissy and patted Reese’s shoulder.
To make matters worse, Chrissy snuggled against her daddy’s side, as if she belonged there. And Katie figured she did. But people were watching. There would be no way to keep this quiet now.
Reese lifted an arm and wrapped it around Chrissy just as the meeting began. And suddenly, Katie saw him with different eyes. No longer was he a belligerent, rebellious teenager. Now he was Chrissy’s daddy. A man who the little girl freely loved and trusted.
Looking up, Katie saw several people gaping at them in open curiosity. She could see the questions in their eyes. The wonderment as they tried to figure out her relationship with the man. And something hardened inside her. No matter what they thought, it was none of their business. Katie had to live her life. She had to do what was right for her daughter.
Locking her jaw, Katie stared right back, until their faces flushed red with embarrassment and they turned frontward. They sang a hymn and later listened to a sermon from the Gospels on feeding the five thousand with a few loaves of bread and two small fishes.
As Katie contemplated the message, she glanced at Reese and saw that he also listened intently. Out of small things, great things were accomplished. Out of faith, miracles occurred.
She was so grateful that Reese had come this far. That he was interested in being a father to their daughter. That they could be friends. But she doubted they could ever be anything more. Reese would move on with his life and possibly find someone else to love and marry. He might even have more children one day, and that thought left Katie feeling sad and empty inside.
The meeting soon ended and Reese, Katie and her family congregated in the outer foyer with numerous other people. Reese edged toward the door, as if eager to escape. Maybe he’d had enough. But Chrissy cut him off.
“You’re coming to Sunday dinner, aren’t you?” she asked.
“Of course he is,” Charlie said.
Reese glanced at Katie, his eyes filled with doubt. “Is that okay?”
She scoffed. “Yes, you’re always welcome in our home.”
But something held her back. A fear she couldn’t explain. As though she were facing a heartache she wouldn’t be able to bear. And the more time she spent with this man, the closer they became, the more intense the feeling.
“My daddy’s a hero.”
Katie jerked around and saw Chrissy talking to Caleb and June Marshall. The two kids were a bit older, but they were friends and often had playdates together.
“I think anyone who survives a wildfire is a hero,” June said.
“Yeah, our dad is a hero, too. He saved us from a fire last year,” Caleb said.
Megan and Jared Marshall stood nearby, smiling and listening to every word. They didn’t comment, but Katie saw their knowing gazes shift between her and Reese. Well, no sense in hiding the truth. Katie met their eyes, keeping her composure.
Jared stepped forward and offered Reese his hand. “I’m glad you could make it today.”
“It’s good to be here,” Reese said.
Katie listened with ambivalence. Yes, she was glad Reese was here, but she had no idea what it really meant. Nor did it change anything for her and Chrissy. Once Reese left town, their lives would continue like before. Maybe he’d return now and then for a brief visit. And that was good. Chrissy needed to see him. It was all that Katie dared ask for. Wasn’t it? Right now, she wouldn’t hope for anything more.
* * *
“Hey, Reese. It’s good to see you.” Sean Nash clapped him on the back.
Turning, Reese saw the man standing with his wife. Reese had met Tessa that day in the restaurant when they’d all crowded around him. He’d had a major panic attack. Now he waited for his PTSD to strike again, but it didn’t. He felt uneasy with the numerous people looking at him, putting it all together that he was Chrissy’s daddy. But no one was looking at him with censure or disapproval. They just smiled. And for some reason, he didn’t want to run away. Not this time. In fact, he felt their camaraderie. Their genuine friendship.
“It’s good to be here,” he said, liking this new feeling.
He glanced at Katie and saw a flash of doubt in her eyes, but she smiled. She was holding up well, considering their daughter had announced openly to everyone that he was her dad. Maybe he shouldn’t have come here. A sinner like him might not be acceptable to the Lord. And that was when an idea occurred to him. Maybe God hadn’t abandoned him, after all. Maybe it was he who had abandoned the Lord.
“Do you know what this young man did?” Mrs. Watkins came out of nowhere, pushing her walker in front of her. Her elderly voice vibrated with happiness as she spoke to the group. “He cleaned up my entire yard and mended my fence, too.”
“I saw the story in the newspaper. Our town needs more positive news like that,” Megan said.
Reese blinked in response. He hadn’t intended for anyone to find out.
“He brought me two cords of wood for the winter and chopped and stacked it all into a neat pile,” Mr. Coleman said.
Charlie smiled widely. “He reroofed my shed.”
Reese shifted his weight, a nervous flush of embarrassment heating his face. “It was my pleasure.”
He longed to flee, but there’d be no quick escape
now. Not with Mrs. Watkins clinging to his arm and several other people blocking his path to the door.
“Have you got somewhere to go for Sunday dinner?” Tessa asked. “I’ve got a roast in the slow cooker at home and you’re more than welcome to join us.”
“Oh, no.” Mrs. Watkins frowned. “Why don’t you come over to my house? I’ve got a nice chicken I’m frying.”
Reese glanced at Katie. She stood beside her father, her face pale. No doubt this day was rather difficult for her, and he couldn’t help wondering how she was taking all this in. When he’d come here, he’d had no idea that Chrissy might blurt out that he was her father. He hated causing Katie any more difficulties.
“I’m sorry, but I’ve already got an invitation for Sunday dinner. But thank you. Maybe another time,” he said.
Frankly, there was nowhere he’d rather be than with Katie, Chrissy and Charlie. But he was surprised when a brief look of relief flashed in Katie’s eyes. Or had he imagined it? Surely she didn’t care if he came to supper. Did she?
“Let me see, you two graduated from high school together, didn’t you?” Mrs. Marley asked Katie.
“Um, yes, we did.” Katie’s voice sounded even enough, but her smile didn’t quite reach her eyes.
“And Reese is Chrissy’s father?” Mrs. Marley persisted, her eyes narrowed like a hawk’s.
Katie turned aside and waved to her daughter, ignoring the question. “Come on, Chrissy. We’ve got to get home.”
She started edging her way toward the door, and Reese couldn’t blame her. He hoped that, now people knew he was Chrissy’s dad, they would just accept it and move on. He couldn’t help feeling compassion for Katie. During all the long, lonely years when she’d been the brunt of the town gossip and had to bite her tongue, he hadn’t been here to comfort her. To offer her support and reassurance. But he was here now.
He faced Mrs. Marley and squared his shoulders. “Yes, I’m Chrissy’s father.”
The woman blinked in surprise. “Oh! So it is true.”
“Yes.”
Turning, he took Chrissy’s hand and led her outside into the summer sunshine. Katie and Charlie followed. And when they stood in the parking lot, Charlie helped the little girl into her booster seat while Reese opened Katie’s door for her.
“You didn’t need to be rude,” she said.
“I’m sorry, but I’m not very good at suffering fools.”
She didn’t look at him. From her locked jaw, Reese could tell she wasn’t happy about today. He felt the urge to say something soothing. Something to let her know she didn’t need to suffer this on her own any longer.
“Katie, I’m sorry about how it happened,” he said. “But at least the news is out there now. No more hiding. You don’t have to pretend anymore.”
She slid into her seat, careful to keep her flowered dress from hiking up and showing too much leg. And he couldn’t help thinking what a beautiful, modest woman she was. A woman much like his mother.
“Yes, everyone will know the truth. And after you leave town, I’ll be left here to deal with the whispers behind my back.” Reaching out, she pulled the door closed, effectively cutting off his reply.
“See you over at the house,” Charlie called.
The man gave Reese a half smile, but it didn’t help much. Right now, Reese was feeling like a heel. He nodded, wondering if he was still welcome to dinner. But deep inside, he knew he had to show up. No more running away. No more cowardice, no more hiding. It was time to put his past behind him. If he ever hoped to build any kind of future for himself and receive the healing power of God’s redeeming love, he had to make a drastic change. And while he’d taken the first step by seeking the Lord, he now realized he needed to exercise some knee-mail and pray. Although that sounded simple, it wasn’t. Not for him. In many ways, prayer was the most frightening thing Reese had contemplated facing since he’d returned to town.
Chapter Eleven
Katie leaned forward and set her half-empty glass of lemonade on the coffee table in the living room. Looking up, she glanced at Reese. He’d rested his head back against the recliner and closed his eyes. Chrissy lay cuddled at his side, clutching her teddy bear to her chest. Her eyes were shut, her fringe of lashes long and thick against her pale cheeks. She breathed deeply, telling Katie that she was asleep.
After Sunday dinner, they had washed the dishes as a family, then retired to watch some TV. Church had been rather exhausting for all of them. When Chrissy had announced that Reese was her daddy, Katie had been ready to run for the door. But now she reconsidered. She had to accept it. For good or bad, the news was out there. She had to take care of Chrissy. People could think what they liked. She had no control over anyone but herself. Besides, she’d never liked keeping secrets and now she didn’t have any. Except for one. And she wouldn’t share that with anyone, nor allow herself to dwell on it, either, because it would only lead to more heartache.
Reese shifted in the chair and brushed his hand over Chrissy’s arm, a careless, gentle caress. Maybe he wasn’t asleep, after all, but just dozing.
A powerful surge rushed through Katie. A protective impulse to keep both Reese and her daughter safe and happy.
Charlie lay sprawled across the sofa, his soft snores stuttering in the air, along with the whoosh from the swamp cooler. The staccato voice of the evening news reporter made Katie wonder how any of them could sleep with all the racket. But the serene atmosphere was calming, the white noise soothing.
Stifling a yawn, she glanced at the clock hanging on the wall. Almost eight o’clock in the evening. The summer sun still glowed through the window, but Reese should get going if he didn’t want to drive up the mountain in the dark. She was reluctant to disturb him. The serenity felt good. And she knew this was what she’d always wanted. A family of her own. What she would never dare hope for.
Reese opened his eyes and looked straight at her. She flinched, embarrassed to be caught staring. He gave her a lazy smile that caused an encompassing warmth to fill her heart. She couldn’t describe how seeing him here in her home, holding their daughter in his strong embrace, made her feel. He’d loosened the collar of his white Oxford shirt and removed his paisley tie. Open and casual. He blinked his eyes, a jagged thatch of hair falling over his high forehead.
“Are you okay?” he asked.
“Yes, of course.” She picked up her knitting and started another row, her hands moving like lightning as she twined the delicate yarn through her fingers.
“What are you making?” he asked.
She paused. “A baby afghan for Helen Sanders. She’s due next month and a group of us are throwing a baby shower for her. You remember Helen, don’t you?”
She waited for his nod, then started knitting again. Helen had been a year older than them. A cute girl he’d dated a couple times.
“My mom used to knit,” he said.
“That’s right. She made an afghan for Chrissy. I’ll have to show it to you sometime.” She glanced at him, noticing his faraway look.
“I find the click of your needles strangely comforting.”
What an odd thing to say. But she liked it anyway.
“I’ve got a friend who works for a construction company in Reno. He says they’re hiring and he thinks I could get a job there,” Reese said.
She tightened her fingers around the knitting needles and missed a stitch. She’d known this day would come. That he’d leave town, and she’d be left to raise Chrissy on her own again. But what other option did he have? He couldn’t fight wildfires anymore. She accepted that. And he couldn’t live in the cabin on Cove Mountain indefinitely. He had to find gainful employment and that wasn’t likely to happen in this sleepy town. He’d have to leave. Eventually. And that thought made her stare.
“I’d come home regularly on weekends for visits,” he said.
Home.
Funny how he’d used that word. He had no family here anymore, except their daughter. Yet he still considered this his home.
“That would be nice. I’m sure Chrissy will miss you,” Katie said.
He shifted his weight in the chair. “I’ll miss her, too.”
“Maybe I can drive Chrissy to Reno to visit you once in a while,” she said.
“That would be nice.”
They were talking like two old married people making plans for their life. And they weren’t. Two old married people, that was. Yet Katie could hardly stand the thought of him leaving town for good. And she didn’t understand why.
She finished the next row of her knitting, then set it aside in a wicker basket and padded across the room in her bare feet. After church, she’d changed out of her frilly dress and high heels and now wore faded blue jeans and a simple shirt. He gazed at her feet.
“I like your pink nail polish,” he said.
She felt the heat of a flush rise up over her cheeks. She stood beside him, gazing down at their daughter. The soft light of love filled her heart and a warm fullness enveloped her chest.
“She’s really out of it,” Katie said.
Reese chuckled. “Yes, definitely tuckered out.”
“Sunday seems to do that to a person. We come home ravenous, and after we eat, we just want to relax.”
“No doubt the Lord knew we needed a rest day. That’s probably why one of the commandments is to keep the Sabbath day holy,” he said.
She blinked, stunned that he knew about that. All these years, she’d thought of him as a heathen who knew nothing about God. But he had surprised her once more.
“Maybe you’re right.” She felt self-conscious with him sitting so close. She almost reached out and took his hand, but she resisted the urge. What was wrong with her? She was feeling sentimental and lonely tonight, which didn’t make sense.
“Can you carry Chrissy into her room? It’s her bedtime,” Katie said.
“Sure.” He lowered the footrest. It gave a soft click as he sat up slowly, cradling their daughter in his arms.