A shadow moved at her window.
Her heart stopped. She jerked up her head as a cold pang of fear slithered down her spine. Oh God! Someone was there.
Scrambling up belly-first from the chair as fast as she could, she grabbed her hairbrush from the dressing table and held it up like a knife as the sash of her window jiggled and swung open with a creak. A dark figure slipped inside her room. As he turned to pull the window closed behind him, she raised the brush to throw it—
“Emily, it’s me.”
Grey. Her heart panged painfully, partially from thinking he was an intruder, partially from him.
She shook the hairbrush at him. “You can’t be here,” she pleaded angrily, careful to keep her voice low as she approached him. “I don’t know how you got up here, but you—”
He grinned. “I lowered myself from the roof by a rope.”
Her lips parted at that, stunned, and she stared at him incredulously. He’d risked his neck scaling down the house to sneak into her room? Her heart now pounded for a whole new reason.
But no matter how daring his entry, he had no right to be here.
“Then you can just leave the same way.” She glowered at him. Arrogant, egotistical, stubborn…oh, the devil take him! Giving an irritated sigh, she placed her hands on her hips and turned toward the door. “And quickly. Before I call for Thomas—”
Grey’s hand clamped over her mouth from behind, his lips at her ear. “I need to see you, brat.” When she hesitated, his hand covered hers and tenderly squeezed her fingers. He slowly caressed up her arm, and goose bumps sprang across her skin. “Please.”
His deep voice seeped into her back and straight through to her breasts. Her nipples tightened traitorously beneath her night rail, and she couldn’t bring herself to step away from his warmth. She nodded, and his hand slid away from her mouth.
“What do you want?” she demanded, but her voice sounded not at all threatening as she let him take the hairbrush from her hand and set it on the vanity, most likely to keep her from brandishing it at him again.
“I wanted to make certain you were all right after this afternoon,” he answered gently. Then he turned her to face him. “Are you all right?”
She swallowed hard. “You need to leave—”
“Emily.” He brushed her hair over her shoulder, tenderly tucking a stray strand behind her ear, then repeated with grave concern, “Are you all right?” They both knew he wasn’t referring to the accident.
Her chest sank. How was she supposed to answer that? If she told the truth, that her heart had shattered from having to reject his marriage proposal, he would only pity her. She couldn’t bear that. And if she lied, he’d leave, and God help her but she didn’t want him to go.
Exhaling slowly, she demanded, “Why are you really here, Grey?” She tried to move back, but he stepped forward, closing the distance between them and taking her shoulders in both his hands to keep her close. “You were here earlier. I’m certain Thomas told you that I wasn’t harmed by the phaeton. As for the other…” She raised her hands to push at his chest, but instead of moving him away, her fickle hands clasped his lapels. “I was very clear with my refusal. There’s nothing more to be said.”
“There are volumes left unsaid between us,” he drawled, lifting a disbelieving brow.
“No, you—”
“Damnation, brat!” His hands slid up to cup her face, drawing her toward him even as he stepped her backward across the room. “I can’t lose you. Don’t you understand that?”
He kissed her, openmouthed, hard, and hungry, like a starving man wanting to devour her. She shuddered from the intensity of him even as she wrapped her arms around his neck and welcomed his kiss.
“I won’t lose you,” he promised, his words frustrated and fervent as his mouth slid away from her lips to caress along her jaw and down her neck.
“But I don’t want to hurt you, Grey.” Her fingertips dug into the hard muscles of his shoulders and back as she sought to pull him closer even as she knew she had to let him go. “And that’s exactly what will happen if I marry you.”
“How could you ever hurt me, Emily,” he groaned as his tongue darted out to lick at the throbbing pulse at the base of her neck, “when being with you brings me such joy?”
She rolled her head to give his mouth access to her throat, then bit back the whimper of pleasure rising on her lips when he pulled loose the bow at the scooped neckline of her nightgown and pushed the material aside to trail his lips across her bare shoulder. Heat swirled through her and landed with a shiver between her thighs.
A soft shudder of arousal swept through her. It had been so long since she’d touched him and kissed him, so very long…How did she survive the past weeks without him? Dear God, how would she carry on when he left?
“Grey,” she whispered pleadingly, unable to find the willpower to step away.
“Only you, Emily.” His words tickled against her throat, her ear, her cheek as he swept his mouth back to capture her lips with an aching groan. “I haven’t been with another woman since you.” He kissed her so tenderly, so lovingly that she sighed against his lips. “And I don’t want there to be anyone but you ever again.”
A soft sob tore from her, and she knew she was lost.
Her body pressed hard against his, welcoming his hands stroking over her as the two of them carefully moved backward across the room toward the bed. His palms fluttered over her breasts and across her hips. Everywhere he touched, heat prickled beneath her skin and left her yearning for his body to invade hers, for his heart to love her.
He lifted her into his arms and placed her on the bed. As he knelt over her, he stroked his fingertips across her cheek and down her throat to the hollow between her breasts. “No matter how hard I try, I can’t quit you, brat.” A shiver fell through her, a soft mewling of arousal and need passing over her lips as his fingertips drew tantalizing circles against the inside swells of her breasts. He smiled at her reaction. “And neither can you.”
Her heart pounded with equal parts desire and bittersweet pain. She knew she should push him away and end this now, but she needed him too much. Tonight, she wanted him—all of him…his laughter and his smile, his strong arms holding her close, his body moving so satisfyingly inside hers. She would deal with the pain tomorrow.
Somehow.
She reached down between them to unfasten his trousers and free him to her seeking eyes and hands. A shiver swept through her at the sight of him. Already he was hard for her, thick and hot, and tonight, for this last time, he was hers. When her fingers closed around him, a guttural sound of pure need tore from the back of his throat.
Without a trace of shame, she began to work at him as he held himself poised over her, one hand sliding up and down his shaft while the other circled the flat of her palm over his enlarged head. Drops of his essence gathered at his tip. With her thumbs, she rubbed them over his skin until he was slick in her hands and easier to stroke as boldly as she knew he craved. She tightened her grip on him, squeezing his thick girth and sliding the soft skin against her palms over the steely hardness beneath until his body stiffened and he shook.
He was ready for her, and with her hot wetness gathered between her clenching thighs, the sweet ache of arousal pulsing inside her, she was more than ready for him.
“Grey, please,” she whispered as her hand grabbed her night rail and pulled it up to her hips, baring her trembling thighs to the cool night air. “I need you.”
“The baby—” He shook his head. “I don’t want to hurt you.”
Her chest tightened hard with emotion. He didn’t want to hurt her, but he had no idea the pain he’d cause her if he didn’t give her this last night together. “It’s all right,” she assured him, running her hands over his chest to quickly unfasten the buttons of his waistcoat and strip it down over his shoulders and off.
He glanced down at her with uncertainty.
“Unless—” Her fingers stilled, a
nd she swallowed hard to free the knot in her throat and whispered, “Unless you don’t find me…attractive…like this.”
“Oh, brat.” He cupped her face and kissed her, hard and deep, as if trying to prove to her how much he desired her. “When I said you were beautiful, I meant it.” His mouth caressed her lips, her cheek, her jaw, her neck. “You’re the loveliest woman I’ve ever met, Emily, inside and out. This baby is part of you, and it only makes you more beautiful.”
Hot tears stung at her lashes. If it were possible, she fell in love with him all over again.
With a gentle push of her hands against his shoulders, she rolled him onto his back. Her body may have wanted his, but her heart needed him.
Her hands found his manhood again, and this time, she followed down with her mouth, to pleasure him the way she’d fantasized about since that day in the carriage when he gave her that wicked, wanton kiss between her thighs. If kissing her there brought her that much pleasure, then surely, if she kissed him here…Her hand closed around him to hold him still as she placed a delicate kiss on his tip.
A low groan rose from him, which emboldened her even more. Her lips closed around him to pull him into the moist heat of her mouth and suck gently. When he shuddered, shivering against her tongue, her chest soared that he liked what she was doing to him as much as she enjoyed the pleasure she gave. She tightened her grip and pumped harder up and down his length even as her mouth drew him deeper, savoring the salty-sweet taste of him on her tongue, the essence that was life and love and pure man. Pure Grey.
“Emily,” he rasped, his teeth bared in a strained half-smile of restraint.
His erection jerked in her mouth, and she moaned around him. In response, her body dripped wet for him, all the muscles inside her folds clenching in a hard spasm that made her gasp, with nearly the same intensity as if he were inside her, stroking her with his body.
“Come here, love.” With trembling hands, all of him tense and shaking now, he took her hips in his hands and shifted her carefully over on top of him. “I need to be inside you. Now.”
Not bothering to remove any more of their clothing, with her night rail gathered at her waist and his trousers only halfway down, she straddled him. His strong hands on her hips guided her as she lowered herself, sliding him inside her inch by wonderful inch, until he was fully sheathed by her body.
She sighed and closed her eyes. With one hand beneath her belly for support, her other hand resting on his chest so she could feel his racing heartbeat, she began to slowly move her hips over him. There was no urgency, no hurry to end this and rush into the dawn, and she wanted to savor this moment as long as possible.
He thrust up gently beneath her, and she rocked herself back and forth along his length to meet each thrust, to withdraw at each retreat before he slid deep inside her again. As the arousal inside her grew toward climax, her hand on his chest fisted his shirt between her fingers, and her thighs clenched tighter against his sides. Her lips parted in a soft gasp, her body tensing around him—
Release rose inside her not as the desperate desire she’d experienced with him before but as a billow of warmth, radiating out from her core to fill all of her with his strength and heat. She rolled back her head as her sex quivered around him, his name a soft whisper on her lips in the darkness.
“Emily…my sweet Emily,” he groaned as he released himself, and she sighed again as his life’s essence flowed into her, claiming her as his once more.
When he’d recaptured his breath, he eased back against the pillows and drew her possessively into his arms as she slowly slid off him and nestled against his side. His large body trembled around hers, and she thrilled to think that she did this to him, that she was able to bring him such shuddering pleasure.
She closed her eyes beneath his loving caresses as he gently stroked his hand across her back, her hip, even tenderly across her belly. The moment had been so special, so overwhelming that she hadn’t realized tears had gathered at her lashes until he kissed them away.
“You have no idea how hard it’s been to stay away from you, brat,” he murmured against her feverish lips, “when what I wanted to do was break down the front door, storm up here to your room, and…well, do that.”
When he grinned wickedly at her, she laughed. A peaceful warmth filled her, from the tips of her fingers to her toes, and she slipped her hand beneath his shirt to feel his heartbeat beneath her fingertips. This was how she wanted to stay, to somehow find a way to stop the dawn from coming so she could remain here with him like this forever.
He placed a delicate kiss at her temple. “I also wanted to just hold you in my arms and tell you that I missed you. That I missed your laugh and that radiant smile of yours. That I care about you and that little baby inside you.” His voice came as a trembling murmur. “That somewhere along the road from Yorkshire I fell in love with you.”
Her heart stopped. Grey loved her? She stared at him through wide eyes, not daring to believe…and when her heart began beating again, the foolish thing didn’t know whether to leap for joy or shatter into a million pieces.
“Grey,” she choked out painfully, her traitorous fingers curling into his chest as his heart raced beneath her fingertips. “You can’t…”
“But I do. I lie awake every night fantasizing about you, Emily, and not just how good it feels to be inside you—but dreams of escorting you to the opera on my arm, waltzing with you at balls, and walking with you through the park.” He cupped her face between his hands and kissed her so tenderly, so lovingly that he stole her breath away. “I want to create a respectable home and a life with you, and I want to put children of my own in your womb.” He drew a shaking breath, taking a moment to steady himself. “I’ll admit—this terrifies the daylights out of me. I’d never considered marriage to anyone before, but now…” He caressed a fingertip over her bottom lip and smiled faintly when it trembled. “Now I can’t imagine not being married to you.”
She froze for just a heartbeat as his words cascaded through her, leaving her trembling and pulsating with love, her heart somersaulting with joy. But the pain came crashing back just as fiercely a few heartbeats later, because nothing had truly changed.
Yet the temptation of what he was offering was too strong, and if she didn’t put distance between them right now, she’d lose whatever thin thread of willpower she had left when it came to him. So she slipped from his arms and stood, her hands shaking so much that she could barely straighten her disheveled night rail. “But I have nothing to offer you…” Except heartache and regret.
“Emily, you are everything I want,” he assured her.
She shook her head as the anguish rose inside her. If only it were that simple, they’d be back on the road right now, this time driving furiously for Scotland. The wedding would be easy, but the marriage would be brutal.
“Marry me, Emily,” he cajoled.
Oh, how much she wanted to do exactly that! She wanted to marry him, give him a family and a home, grow old together surrounded by children and grandchildren…But at what cost to the future he deserved? And to her heart? She’d survived being abandoned once by a husband who grew to hate her; she would never survive it by Grey.
“I can’t,” she breathed, her hand pressing hard against her chest, as if she could physically prevent her heart from breaking.
“Because I’m not good enough for you,” he said quietly, his voice carefully even.
She nodded, unable to put words to her deceit.
“That same old lie again, brat?” With a tired sigh, he pushed himself out of bed and walked slowly toward her. “I didn’t believe it the first time you told me, and I don’t believe it now.”
“It’s true! We are different.” She pushed at him to put him away, but the blasted man only shifted closer, until he held her once more within the circle of his arms. “You weren’t born into society—”
He shrugged. “I’ve achieved it.”
“Not completely.”
She shuddered with dread, knowing he was fully prepared for battle this time. “You’re an army officer—”
“I’m a major.”
“But everyone believes you’re the son of a blacksmith who has the audacity to climb into their ranks.”
“And you’re a widow who can have the audacity to do as she pleases. Including marrying the son of a blacksmith who became a major.”
Her heart wrenched in aggravation at his arguments. “You’re a born adventurer. For heaven’s sake!” She pointed adamantly at the window. “You came through my window on a rope! Any normal person would have come announced through the front door.”
With a wolfish grin, he lowered his head and brushed his lips along the side of her neck. “I couldn’t have made love to you if I’d come announced through the front door.”
A groan of frustration rose from her as he looped a finger over her neckline and tugged it down to run his lips over the top swells of her breasts.
“Grey,” she pleaded, knowing she was losing the battle. And if he kept touching her like this—she gasped as his tongue slipped beneath her night rail to lick across her nipple—oh, dear heavens, she’d lose the war!
“Who wants normal, anyway?” he purred. He gave another tug at her gown and freed a single breast completely to his greedy eyes and seeking lips, and his tongue teased at her nipple as much as his words teased at her heart. “Normal is boring. Normal is for county squires and society dullards who have nothing better to do with their days than waltz at balls and—”
He froze, his lips stilling against her.
When he lifted his head to stare down into her eyes in the dark shadows, she caught her breath at the accusation on his face. He’d figured out the truth, this man who had always been able to read her so easily—God help her, he knew!
Along Came a Rogue Page 25