by April Munday
“And Anna spends most of the day alone in the library.”
“She writes poetry. Sometimes I sit with her. We ride out together every morning.”
“And inspect cottages.” She rose from the chair and stood over him again. She had had many years practice using her impressive height and her additional fifteen years to dominate him. “Don’t you know how to court a woman?”
Lady Caroline was angry again and Meldon slammed his hand on the top of his desk.
“Enough! She will marry Finch and that’s an end to it.”
“I think it might be the end of you.”
Lady Caroline swept out of the small room.
Meldon made a cradle of his arms and dropped his head onto them. He knew that she was right.
After dinner the general had made it clear that he wished to speak to Meldon and Finch alone. Since Vincent’s death Meldon had had doubts about his household. He was certain that one of them had sent Vincent into the arms of his murderer. This meant that the kind of conversation the general wanted could only take place out of doors. This could be managed during his morning ride, but Finch would have to ensure that Anna could not hear them. Meldon found that he was grinding his teeth at the thought of giving them even more time alone together.
Confident that they had arranged this in such a way that anyone listening would not have understood, Meldon took a seat as near to Anna as he could. There would be no playing cards after tonight and, if he could not enjoy her company tomorrow morning, he would enjoy it now.
Meldon noticed that, however hard his brother-in-law tried to join them, Caro distracted him and made it impossible.
“Do you dance?” he asked after he had watched Finch take a wide path around them to get to the countess on the other side of the room. Had Caro had words with him, as well?
“Of course I dance. Surely you know enough gentlemen’s daughters to know that they dance.”
Damn! He’d insulted her. Then he recalled that he had seen her dancing at his house. He really wasn’t thinking properly.
“I meant to ask if you enjoy dancing.”
“In the right company.”
“And the waltz? Do you approve of the waltz?”
Anna blushed prettily.
“I believe even some respectable women dance it.”
“Would you?”
“With the right partner.”
Meldon hesitated. She was looking at him shyly as if waiting for him to put himself forward as that partner, or perhaps thinking about Carstairs taking that position.
“And you, my lord?” It was clear that he had somehow frustrated her by not saying something. “Do you find it disreputable?”
“Slightly,” admitted Meldon. Finch was right; he was a fool. How could he now propose dancing with her when he had just told her that he thought it would soil her reputation?
To his surprise Anna smiled.
“You are quite old-fashioned, my lord. No wonder it scandalises you to see me in breeches.”
Meldon didn’t trouble to correct her error. He very much enjoyed seeing her in breeches. Now that she no longer felt the need to complete the disguise by flattening her breasts or moving like a man, he found her almost more feminine in them than in her dresses.
“There is no need to court ruin,” he said seriously, then smiled as she frowned. She laughed when she realised he had been joking.
Still smiling, she said, “I thank you for all the care you have taken for my reputation. I have not always been as grateful as I should.”
“Then will you allow me to be reckless for once? Will you dance a waltz with me tomorrow?”
She surprised him again. Not only was there no hesitation when she answered, but she said, “I will dance as many waltzes with you as you wish.”
He didn’t understand why she was quite so serious about it, but he had spent so long standing on the edge of ballrooms that he no longer understood the nuances of etiquette involved in dancing with a woman. Perhaps Caro could explain it to him. Then he remembered that it had been a very long time since he had danced with a woman.
“My lord? My lord, are you unwell?”
“I’m sorry, Miss Smith, I just realised that I don’t know how to waltz.”
She laughed again. How easy it was to make her laugh when he wasn’t trying.
“Then come with me now and I’ll teach you.”
She started to rise, but Meldon stayed her with a raised hand.
“You forgot your reputation. Just a moment.”
He rose and crossed the room to his sister.
“Caro, Miss Smith is going to teach me to waltz. Would you mind accompanying us to the library?”
Lady Caroline looked smug as she excused herself from her husband.
“So you have finally decided on a strategy,” she said quietly.
“I think you might be right,” he agreed.
As he walked back to her, he noticed that Anna was frowning as she looked at him.
“Something’s wrong?”
“Your leg. How long can you support your own weight?”
Now she had him. Meldon tried to remember if she’d even seen him walk without his stick. Even at the duel he’d been leaning on it until he’d shot her.
“Long enough for a waltz.” It was not a lie, just not the whole truth. He could dance a whole evening of waltzes without too much difficulty; it was sitting that did the damage. He thought ruefully of the last time he had held her in his arms, on the journey here. Any pleasure he might have had from it was destroyed by the harm he inflicted on himself in the effort to keep her from harm. He had not been able to walk without his stick for a week afterwards. Now, however, he would hold her and she would be held willingly.
Anna smiled, reached for his outstretched hand and allowed him to help her up.
“Miss Smith is just going to teach me to waltz for tomorrow night,” he explained to his mother and his guests. He smiled as he left the room for he knew it would give them plenty to talk about.
It was cold in the library and Lady Caroline sent one of the maids to bring her shawl down.
Anna placed herself in front of Meldon and showed him where to place his hands. Then she explained the steps. Since this proved difficult for him to follow she demonstrated with Lady Caroline. They began to dance. Meldon smiled as he watched, for Anna was leading.
They stopped in front of him.
“Did you pay attention?” asked Lady Caroline.
“I’m not a child to be told where he needs to look,” said Meldon and looked at Anna who was now waiting for him with her arms in position.
She smiled up at him confidently. The smile disappeared when he whispered into her ear, “You’re not playing the man now.”
She blushed and lowered her arms.
Lady Caroline laughed. “Perhaps you could let her lead, George. She, at least, knows what she’s doing.”
Meldon ignored his sister, touched his hand to Anna’s, counted to three and set off. Two steps later he was on the floor and Anna was looking down at him, with her face showing her concern.
He heard his sister laughing at him.
“I might have broken something, Caro,” he growled.
“Only your pride.”
“I’m alright,” he said quickly, for Anna had paled at his suggestion.
“I’m sorry,” she said, "I don’t know what happened.”
“It wasn’t your fault,” he said, as he started to get up from the floor. He got up smoothly so she would know that he really was unhurt.
“It’s been so long since George danced,” said his sister, “that he’s forgotten quite how badly he danced when he did.”
Was she right? Meldon didn’t think he had been a clumsy dancer, just a man who wasn’t very interested in dancing. But he was the one getting up from the floor.
“At least I didn’t take you down with me,” he said to Anna.
“Perhaps I should have tried to break your fall,” she
looked close to tears, but he couldn’t stop himself.
“I’m not a damned invalid.”
Anna took a step away from him.
“I’m sorry. That was uncalled for. Caro’s right; my pride is damaged. Can you forgive me?”
“Yes, my lord.”
Meldon wondered what he was doing here, shouting at her and making her afraid of him.
“Can we start again...please?”
Anna nodded and placed herself close to him again. When he had asked her to teach him, he had expected to impress her with the ease with which he would waltz. What was happening could only make him less in her eyes.
“Perhaps, my lord, if you stand further away from me, I can watch your feet and see what’s happening.”
Obediently he took a step back. They danced a few steps.
“Ah,” said Anna and they stopped.
She lifted her face to his.
“I have an idea. Will you follow my lead for a moment?”
Meldon knew he must look like a disappointed schoolboy when he nodded, but Anna stepped close enough to take all his cares away and they started again. He knew at once where he’d gone wrong.
“Ah,” he said.
Anna smiled and they stopped. Neither of them spoke, but he felt her relinquish the lead to him and it was as if she was giving him a gift. He didn’t even count, but set off and she followed.
Whether he had danced well before or not, he was no longer indifferent. Dancing with Anna became the single most important thing in his life. Her smile was reflected on his own face and it was only when she began to laugh that he stopped.
“Don’t stop,” she begged, “please.”
“But you’re laughing. I must be doing something wrong.”
“You’re doing nothing wrong. I’m laughing because I’m enjoying myself and I won’t be able to laugh tomorrow.”
Meldon laughed with her. There seemed no other appropriate response. Then they set off again and he knew happiness.
“I’ll show you how I did it if you want.”
Anna watched Meldon and Finch exchange a glance. They were in Meldon’s dressing-room drinking whisky and playing cards. Even though it was time shared with someone else, usually Perkins, this was Anna’s favourite time of the day. She and Meldon rarely spoke as they played, but it seemed she knew him better then than at any other time of the day.
“We know how you did it; we just don’t know why we didn’t see it.” Finch was exasperated. It was he who had brought up the trick she had played on Meldon in order to call him out. Meldon had told her some time ago that he had worked out how she had done it and they had not mentioned it since. Finch had just complimented her on her skill at cards after she had caught him trying the same trick on her. She acknowledged that he had not been trying to cheat; he was just curious about how she had done it without being seen, since it had been easy enough for her to catch him out. Anna sighed; they would not like the answer. She was glad Perkins was not with them.
“You were none of you looking at my hands or the cards.”
“Yes, we were,” said Finch. “We always look at hands, just to make sure.”
“No, we weren’t,” said Meldon, reluctantly, although she thought he must have been relieved to realise that he wasn’t the only one to be confused by his reaction to Jonas Smith.
“Of course we were,” blustered Finch.
“Think about it if you wish, but do not ask Miss Smith to explain it.”
“But Meldon...”
“Do not ask her,” repeated Meldon slowly and forcefully.
Anna wasn’t sure if it was for Finch’s sake or her own.
They continued their play, but Anna watched Finch’s face more often.
“Miss Smith, perhaps it would be better if you retired to bed now.”
Meldon had caught her watching his friend.
“There’s no need, unless you wish to go, Miss Smith,” said Finch. “I understand now how you did it.”
“I am not proud of it, Mr Finch.”
“I am just surprised that such a young woman should have such knowledge of men’s basest natures.”
“It’s because she’s a beautiful young woman.” Meldon spared her the embarrassment of an explanation. “We all reacted to a beautiful young woman and we couldn’t admit it to ourselves, because we thought she was a man.”
“You’re a very clever young woman,” said Finch turning to her.
“I didn’t feel very clever,” said Anna. “I didn’t know that’s how it would be, you must believe me.”
“But wasn’t it a big risk?” asked Finch.
“Not really. If I was seen, Lord Meldon would call me out, or so I thought. Now I know that I was mistaken. I should have known...”
“Enough,” said Meldon, kindly. “There’s no need to distress yourself.”
For a long time Anna had known how men reacted to her. It still troubled her that men’s eyes became dark with lust when they were introduced to her. She had learned to be cool so that they were not encouraged to pursue their desire. When some men had reacted in the same way to Jonas Smith, she had wondered whether she might be able to use it to further her plans. She should have been pleased when Meldon reacted so strongly to her, but her reaction to him had been equally powerful. Torn between love and hate, she had chosen hate, for he had made love impossible by killing James.
“I’m sorry, my lord.”
Meldon frowned. “I wish you would stop calling me ‘my lord’.”
“What else can I call you?”
“George.”
Anna was so distracted by the thought that she smiled, even though she realised that that was his intention. She thought carefully before she answered.
“I should very much like to call you by your name, but I fear that it would elicit gossip that would harm us both.”
“When we are alone, then.”
Since they were so rarely alone, it was a promise easily given.
“Or with Finch.”
Anna gasped and knew that she blushed. Meldon looked pained.
“Perhaps you’ve had enough to drink, Meldon,” suggested Finch.
“Perhaps I have,” conceded Meldon, although Anna had noticed that he had been even more abstemious than usual. Meldon drank little, whilst appearing to drink a great deal. Anna doubted Finch thought his friend was drunk. He might not be as clever as Meldon, but he was more observant.
“Another hand?” suggested Anna.
Finch shook his head. “If I’m to dance with beautiful women for many hours tomorrow, I must sleep tonight.”
He stood and Meldon followed. Reluctantly Anna stood as well. There could be no more evenings like this.
Chapter Eight
Meldon and General Warren rode side by side slightly ahead of Finch and Anna. Meldon guessed that Warren either wanted to tell him the outcome of what he and Finch had done in Kent or give him a new mission. He wasn’t expecting what the general was telling him.
“We intercepted a package going to France. There was news of your man Carstairs.”
Meldon held his breath; the rumours had been right.
“I don’t want you to do anything about it at the moment and you must promise me that you won’t.”
Warren was silent.
“You’re going to tell me something that will make me want to harm Carstairs.” It was a statement, not a question.
“Yes,” agreed the general.
Meldon thought for a moment. He was already reining in his desire to harm Carstairs because of Anna. Where his country was concerned his head always ruled his heart, but he had little self-control where Anna was concerned.
“Very well. You have my word.”
“Carstairs killed Vincent.”
The knowledge affected Meldon less than he had expected. His first thought was that he must keep Anna away from Carstairs tonight and every other night. Then he knew anger.
“Meldon?”
“I was thin
king about Miss Smith.”
“Yes,” said Warren. “When I heard about Carstairs’ desire to court her, I thought she might be your first concern. You can’t tell her and you can’t warn him off.”
“I know.”
Meldon was already working through the possibilities. “But you will allow me to be the one who kills him.”
“When the time comes.”
“I can tell Finch?”
“Of course. I thought I might have to rely on him to restrain you.”
Meldon wondered why. He had controlled his passions for so long it was a surprise to him that anyone could think he would ever act without calmly working out his strategy to the last detail.
Today they eschewed the cottages in favour of the sheep, who had arrived the day before. Anna had expressed a desire to see them and Meldon wished to keep her as happy as she had been yesterday.
As he helped her down from her horse he thought she looked pale. He recalled that he had not heard her laugh on the way here.
“Are you ill, Miss Smith?” He was unable to hide his concern.
“Only tired, my lord. I slept ill last night.”
“I am sorry to hear it.”
He took her hand and tucked it into the crook of his free arm, careful to make it look impulsive. He, too, had had little sleep as he had put the finishing touches to his strategy for what he had convinced himself would be their last easy day together.
As he had expected, she smiled up at him and walked beside him. She gave no sign of being unbalanced by his uneven gait.
“I don’t know what you see in sheep, Meldon,” said Warren as Meldon signalled the shepherd to start moving the sheep in their direction.
“Wool,” said Meldon. “My wealth is founded on it, but my great-grandfather lost faith in it and sold the flocks. I want to build them up gain. This land is good for sheep.”
The shepherd came up to him and Meldon asked how the journey had been and how the sheep had coped. All the time he was aware of Anna’s hand on his arm. She asked questions, too, and Josh, the shepherd, showed his pleasure as he answered them.
“I see Miss Smith shares your interest in sheep,” said Warren as they walked back to the horses.